Lily could not argue that point. The tips of the gray waves did indeed leave a wildly beautiful trail of frothy foam in their wake. Her gaze swung out over the wide blue sky before them. She breathed deeply of the salty sea air. What a glorious day! She would not allow any thought of Tristan to mar this time with Sabina.
It would not last forever.
The strange wave of sadness she felt made Lily turn to Sabina and speak with more emotion in her voice than she knew. “Which way, dear heart?”
Sabina smiled widely, her gray eyes excited as she pointed along the upper pathway. “That way.” Lily felt herself respond to that enthusiasm. To the child every moment was an adventure.
Lily swallowed the lump of feeling in her throat as Sabina reached for her hand once again. Slowly she took the tiny fingers in her own. She carefully checked her speed as the wee one trotted up the incline.
Sabina seemed content to go on in silence now, appearing to require all her concentration to negotiate the narrow path. Lily felt her heart swell anew as she noted the frown of perseverance that creased that smooth ivory brow.
Once again she found herself wishing…
But down that road was only sorrow. There was no way this tale could have a happy ending, no matter what the truth might be.
So occupied was she with her own confused feelings that she did not take note of the fact that they were no longer moving uphill until Sabina actually came to a halt at the edge of a wide flat plateau. Lily frowned in consternation at what she saw.
It was not a geographical detail that caused her expression, nor even the enormous stone structure rising up ahead of them. Though the tall circular building must be near completion, the fact that it was not yet finished was evidenced by the scaffolding that ringed it and the men who moved busily about the base. This was obviously the signal tower Tristan had designed. The reason Lily had not seen it before was that she had never had an opportunity to visit this plateau, clearly the highest point along this stretch of seacoast.
Never having glimpsed the structure, Lily had assumed that it would be farther from the castle. Benedict had said only that Tristan was working. Could he be here rather than away, as she had so childishly hoped?
Lily knew she did not want to take the risk. She wished above all else to avoid contact with that man. She looked back the way they had come, saying, “Come, Sabina, we—”
Yet before she could finish, the little one had slipped her tiny hand free. She trotted across the short coarse grass, calling gaily, “Da!”
Lily’s frown deepened. Obviously the child believed her father was here.
“Da! Da!” Sabina continued to call, making their slipping away unobserved highly unlikely.
Slowly Lily followed after her, trying desperately to think of some way to avoid seeing the man who so plagued her. Perhaps, she told herself hopefully, Tristan was not even here.
She quickened her steps and caught up with the little one. This was a construction site, and there might be any number of hazards that could cause the child hurt. As she and Sabina came around the edge of the structure, she saw that she had been wise to think thusly.
A wagon stood off to the side and three men were busy unloading what appeared to be very heavy stones. Not far from them, another man was mixing what looked like mortar in a hollowed out place in the ground. More men were taking the stones and tying heavy ropes around them, while still others then pulled them to the top of the tower.
It was a scene of intense activity. All the workers seemed far too busy to attend a very curious and precocious three year old. Indeed, it appeared that no one had even taken note of her and Lily’s arrival.
Hurriedly, Lily reached down and took Sabina into her arms. She had not seen any sign of Tristan, but that was the least of her concerns now. This was no place for a small child.
Sabina squirmed. “I want Da.”
Lily spoke gently. “We will see him back at the keep, sweeting. We should not be here.”
It was then that Lily saw a man appear from around the edge of the stone structure. There was no mistaking Tristan’s tall, wide-shouldered frame and tousled dark hair. His hands rode his lean hips and he moved with purpose, his face a study of concentration. As he looked up and saw them, he stopped still, a scowl marring his brow.
Sabina cried out loudly with glee, making several heads turn in their direction. “Da!”
Tristan focused all his attention upon his daughter, smiling with warm affection as he came toward them. Realizing that she did not wish to be holding the child while Tristan spoke to her, Lily gently set her on her feet.
As Sabina trotted toward him, Tristan stretched his own arms wide. She ran to him, and he scooped her up into the air, swinging her about. Lily moved forward slowly as Sabina squealed wildly with delight, and even more loudly when Tristan pulled her close to hug her tightly.
Lily felt her own heart flutter then as he looked up, his still-warm gaze coming to rest on her face. That happy expression disappeared immediately, replaced by a look of wariness that made her falter.
Whatever was the matter with him? It was she who had been insulted and hurt by him.
Regret made her chest ache for a brief moment before she forced herself to go on. She would not allow herself to react to Tristan. For the thousandth time she told herself that she was indifferent to him and his opinion of her.
Nothing short of complete acceptance of all the things he had told her about herself, and a subsequent condemnation of her father and mother, would please him. She could not afford him that.
Lily stopped a few feet from the two of them. Tristan nodded stiffly, and she bobbed her head in return.
He spoke abruptly. “I had not expected you here.”
Lily stiffened even more. “I assure you, my lord, I had no intention of troubling you. Sabina and I were simply taking a walk. When the path forked, she chose the one that led here. I can only assume that she has been to this spot previously and hoped you would be here.”
He nodded. “She has come here before with Genevieve.” His tone did not indicate that he was any more pleased with Lily’s presence than he had been before her explanation. There was no mistaking the reference to his betrothed state.
What was she to say to that? Folding her arms tightly across her abdomen beneath the enveloping cloak, Lily looked at the ground. It was true she had once again lost all sense of propriety the moment he touched her last eve, but it was Tristan who had initiated the contact.
Tristan looked at Lily’s bent head with regret, seeing her upset once again, though he had not meant to displease her. If only they were not so at odds. He had not imagined this would happen when he had brought her to Brackenmoore.
What had he thought it would be like? He could not answer his own query.
All he wanted now was to have peace with her. Yet how could he do that with a clear conscience when he could not stop himself from noticing the way the December sun shone on the midnight silk of her hair? Could not help seeing how the breeze shaped her cloak along the length of her slender body? Or how this made him recall just how lovely she was without benefit of any covering at all?
Sabina’s childish voice interrupted the path of his thoughts. “Can we go to the top?” She pointed upward to the top of the tower.
He nodded, grateful for the opportunity to think of something beside his unwanted and unwarranted, yet completely overwhelming, attraction to Lily.
He moved toward the structure. As he did so, Sabina, who had been looking backward over his shoulder, cried out, “Lily, too.”
Tristan stopped and turned. Lily stood where she had been before, her expression at once desolate and defiant. Did she perhaps feel that he would not want her to come? The wave of compassion this thought brought was surprising. He found himself saying softly, “Lily, too. If she would care to come.”
“Oh yes!” Sabina jerked her head with enthusiasm. “It is so high. She will like it.”
Tristan l
ooked into Lily’s eyes, his tone gently teasing as he said, “What say you, fair damsel? Will you go up on high with us?”
She stared at him for a long moment, her gaze uncertain.
Almost without knowing he was going to say the words, Tristan urged, “Come, Lily, join us.”
Sabina added her own encouragement. “Yes, come with us, Lily.”
Again, she watched only him, and Tristan felt she would decline. Then something seemed to snap inside her, for she moved toward them. Keeping her attention centered on Sabina, she said, “I thank you for inviting me.”
Tristan could not stop a rush of consternation. Her words made it clear that she was only humoring Sabina. He pushed it aside with a shrug. “Shall we go on then?” No more was said as he moved to enter the opening that would soon be covered by a heavy wooden door. He tried to concentrate on climbing the wooden steps that ran around the inside of the wall, but he was completely aware of her presence behind him.
There was really no danger even though the steps were fairly narrow. Yet he was careful of where he placed his feet, ever mindful of the precious burden in his arms, and his own preoccupation with the woman behind them.
Lily focused her attention on the rows of stones that made up the wall. Anything was safer than thinking about the way Tristan’s thighs flexed as he moved before her, safer than thinking about how they had felt sliding along her own. Surely anything was safer than thinking about what it would be like if she and Tristan were together, if Sabina were theirs.
Desperately she closed her eyes. Even the possibility of plunging to the bottom of the tower was preferable to contemplating her tumultuous feelings about this man and his child.
When they came to the top of the edifice, the men who were working there stopped what they were doing, casting self-conscious glances toward Lily. Tristan spoke easily. “You may all go down and have a rest for a time. Sabina will only get in your way for now, at any rate.”
When the laborers had left them, Lily felt even more uneasy. Now she was alone with Tristan and Sabina, at the top of the world.
For that was the way it seemed as she gazed off over the landscape laid out before them. On one side was the sea, dark, frothy and mysterious. On the other was the land, the castle and the grounds surrounding it appearing as vast and unchangeable as the sea.
Lily could not help acknowledging that were the circumstances different, she might have taken pride and comfort in the awesome and mighty sight of Brackenmoore. As it was, she could only struggle against an unaccustomed sense of intimidation and bondage. Why, why did she feel that way? Tristan was not trying to hold her here.
Perhaps, whispered a soft voice inside her, it is your own reactions that make you feel thusly. Perhaps you only wish you could stay. Perhaps you only wish the strength and permanence of Brackenmoore were yours, along with the loyalty and fellowship of the folk who dwell there.
Immediate horror made her take in a sharp breath. She had no such wish.
Glancing over at Tristan she found him watching her with an assessing expression that was becoming all too familiar. She lifted her head. Watch her he might, but he could not read her mind, no matter that it might feel as though he could.
Lily pretended her reaction had been to the view, sweeping her hands wide. “It is wondrous, is it not?”
Tristan nodded, his own gaze now turning to the landscape. “Aye, it is. As a child I used to come to this point and think that I would build something here one day, something so tall that it would reach all the way to heaven.” He laughed. “At the time I had no idea that I would think of anything so useful and needed as a signal tower. That idea came to me after my parents were killed along this stretch of coast in a winter storm. They were coming back from a visit to my mother’s aunt Finella in Scotland.”
Lily heard the pain in his voice, though she knew the incident had happened many years ago. “You must have loved them so very much.”
He swallowed, not meeting her gaze for a long moment. “I did love them. They were the center of our world, taught us that family was everything.”
She looked out over the vast sea, which seemed so harmless now. Yet obviously that could change at any moment. “It explains why you are so close to your brothers. And why you are so bent on seeing the tower completed.”
He looked at her, his eyes holding wry amusement, along with lingering traces of grief. “Do not be sure that I would not have done so if they had not died. Such an attitude is not very flattering. I am not completely without talents, though I am a younger son.”
“I did not…” She halted, biting her tongue in consternation. She had not meant to imply any such thing. But to try to explain without giving away her true feelings would be far too difficult.
He shrugged again, his tone indifferent. “It matters not either way.”
Lily was not unaware of the way the muscles worked in his lean jaw. It seemed a contradiction to his words, but that could not be. She knew he had no care as to what she thought of him.
It was only as Sabina chose that moment to begin squirming to get down that Lily even recalled that the little one was present.
Tristan held her tightly. “No, minx. You may not get down. Not until the upper wall is complete.”
Lily was grateful for the interruption and for the fact that Tristan intended to keep a tight hold on his daughter. There was still a large gap in the low wall that surrounded the top section of the tower, though the domed crown above it had been completed. It looked as though some sort of wide platform was being built into the wall of the unfinished section.
Before Lily could form a question as to its purpose, Sabina made a noise of irritation, even as a wide yawn escaped those pert little lips. Instantly Lily spoke up. “The child is tired. I should take her back to the keep for a nap.”
Tristan looked down at his daughter, clearly noting the heaviness of her lids. “Yes, I can see that she is. Very well then, we’ll go down. It is time the men started back to work at any rate. We are attempting to finish before any really severe winter storms are upon us.”
His relief at the notion of being rid of them—her— seemed almost palpable. Yet she refused to think of that. She simply wanted to be on her way.
They had just started down when there was a sharp cry from one of the workers below. Other excited voices called out immediately.
Quickly Tristan moved to look out over the unfinished wall. “What is it?”
A faint reply came to Lily’s ears. “’Tis master mason Jack, my lord. The donkey slipped on the wet ground, and he was standing behind the cart, talking with one of the workers. His leg seems to have got caught when it happened. The cart’s run over him, my lord.”
Even from here, Lily could not mistake the anxiety in the man’s voice. Neither, it seemed, could Tristan, for he hurried to make his way down, anxiety marking his handsome features.
She followed closely behind him.
When they had reached the ground, Tristan looked down at Sabina and paused. He frowned, then turned to Lily, speaking softly but distractedly. “She has fallen asleep.”
Peering at the child in his arms, Lily saw that it was true. She moved toward him briskly, holding out her arms. “I will take her back to the keep.”
Tristan shook his head. “Nay, ‘tis too far for you to carry her.”
Lily shook her own head emphatically. “It is not. I can manage quite well. You are needed here.”
He frowned, but made no reply to that. Swinging around to look into the grim faces of the men gathered around the donkey cart, he said with barely held patience, “Randel, you will take Sabina.”
When a tall slender man with gentle eyes stepped forward, Tristan handed the child to him carefully. “Have a care and take her back to the keep while I see to Jack.”
The man bowed, settling the babe in his arms in a way that told Lily he was no stranger to children. Though she was irritated with Tristan for his autocratic disregard of her own assurances
that she could manage the task, Lily felt the child was in safe hands.
She turned to go after Randel as he started for the keep, but something made her pause. She swung around, biting her lower lip as she took in the grim expressions of the men. She wondered if perhaps she could be of more help here.
What if Tristan did not want her aid? Another glance at the men’s faces decided her. The devil take Tristan Ainsworth. Her own sense of compassion bade her try.
She joined Tristan behind the cart. He was kneeling beside the man they had called Jack. Lily could see the blood beginning to pool on the ground near his legs. The fellow’s expression was twisted with pain, though he tried to put on a brave face as his master felt his wounded leg.
Tristan’s own face was now as grim as that of the other men.
Lily crouched beside him and saw what had caused his apprehension. The man’s leg was twisted badly, a sharp shaft of white bone poking through the flesh.
She felt her stomach writhe with both reaction to the rawness of the wound and also sympathy for the hurt man. Few ever walked again after sustaining such an injury.
Tristan spoke to Jack. “I will tell no falsehood, Jack. ‘Tis not good.”
Jack, whose fleshy face was the color of fresh whey, nodded, his voice rough with pain as he replied, “I thought as much, my lord.”
Hurriedly Tristan said, “Save your strength for now, Jack. The bone will need to be set.” He then glanced up at Lily, displaying no surprise at seeing her there. “We need to stop the bleeding.”
Ignoring her own surprise that he would ask for her aid, Lily stood and raised the hem of her gown. She then made quick work of tearing a wide strip from the bottom of her shift.
Tristan took it and wound it around the wound, keeping the leg as straight as he could. When he was finished, his troubled gaze met Lily’s. “Will you stay by him for the moment?”
She nodded eagerly. In spite of her worry and fear for the injured man, she felt a warm sense of happiness sweep over her. “Of course.”
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