by M. Robinson
We didn’t go out that night. She led me to our dining room to a well thought out meal, candles, and soft music playing in the background.
We talked about our days and then exchanged presents.
She loved the beautiful necklace with matching earrings, and made me fasten it around her neck. I kissed the back of her shoulder as I did, whispering that I loved her.
She handed me my gift next. I opened it confused. It was a beautiful silver plated baby rattle with I love you, engraved on the handle.
“Babygirl?” I said, in a question.
“Yes, Sebby,” she replied with a smile. No wonder she didn’t touch her wine. She would have normally been tipsy by then.
“What? When? How do you know? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Jesus Sebby, slow down. You’re going to hyperventilate. I’ve known for a week. I didn’t want to tell you until our anniversary.”
Scratch what I said about not being able to be any happier. That was the happiest day of my life. We had been trying for almost a year. Julia was starting to worry that she was going to be like her mother and wouldn’t be able to conceive. It couldn’t have come at a better time.
The months that followed Julia’s news of us becoming a family were a bit hectic, we bought our first home in Coral Gables; a 4,600 square foot five bedrooms, six baths, waterfront home with a dock. Julia promised that once things settled down, we could buy a 40ft Windy Maestro that I’ve had my eye on. How can a yacht dealer not own a boat?
Julia went full tilt on decorating, painting, remodeling, and furniture. Everyday I came home, something had changed. I had very little input, except for my office and man cave, those were mine. The rest she decided what she wanted to do with. She was absolutely glowing.
Her pregnancy had been good to her with just some morning sickness in the first trimester, other than that, she had been fine. She had the weirdest cravings for whip cream and pickles, not together, although we did find some fun stuff to do with the whip cream.
All the ultrasounds and doctor appointments showed a healthy growing beautiful boy. I was ecstatic to have a son. Julia was thrilled as well; she wanted to have just sons. She said she didn’t want to share her thunder and that she wanted to be the queen of the house, surrounded by her men. We hadn’t even had him yet and she was already talking about having another one.
The house was nearly done and Julia was about ready to pop. She was due in a week in a half, and she was starting to feel uncomfortable in her own skin.
“SEBBY!” She yelled, from our bedroom.
“Yes, Babygirl?” I said, while leaning on our doorframe.
“Ugh…where did you go? I woke up and I was by myself. You said you were going to stay in bed with me all day. You promised to pay attention to me all weekend.”
“I know, I went to the bathroom and then I went to make myself a sandwich. Are you hungry?” She looked at me like I had two heads.
“I’m pregnant with your child Sebby, he eats like you do. Of course, I’m hungry.”
“Okay, do you want me to bring it in here or do you want to come eat out here?” I asked.
“I don’t know. I want to be done already. I want to be skinny again and not be bloated. I want to be able to see my feet again. I can’t even stand for longer than ten minutes without my back hurting.” She had been extra whinny these last few weeks, the closer we got to the due date; the more her squeaky voice came out. I walked over to her and helped her sit up.
“I know, Babygirl. What can I do to help? Do you want me to rub your back and feet? How about a warm bath? We can take it together and I’ll massage all of your body parts.” I said, with a suggested tone and face.
“God Sebby, can you not think about sex. Why would I want another thing inside me right now?”
On that note, “Okay, I’m going to go make you something to eat.” I started to get up and she grabbed my arm.
“No! Oh God, I’m sorry Sebby. I know I’m being a bitch, I can’t help it. Your child is torturing me, he thinks my stomach is a soccer field. He won’t stop kicking me and I’m not sleeping well. All these crazy hormones are getting to me. I don’t know if I want to cry, laugh, or smile. I’m all over the place. I’m just ready to have him here already, and not making a mess of my insides.”
“I know Babygirl, not that much longer. Soon he will be here and you will be missing him being in your tummy.” I helped her out of bed.
“Come on, let’s go eat in the living room, maybe a change of scenery will help. I’ll make you a ham, turkey, and pickle masterpiece. And then, we can watch whatever movies you want to watch for the rest of the day. I will rub your feet and your back. I promise my magical hands will make you feel much better.”
“Alright.” She said in a mopey voice. I didn’t know how much more I could take of this. I didn’t like seeing her in pain. I couldn’t imagine what she was going through, I was trying my best to comfort her.
We watched movies all night and we both fell asleep on the couch. Julia was lying on my chest and I awoke to something wet on my legs.
“Julia…Babygirl…Jules…wake up.”
“Hmm…” She stirred.
“Baby, you’re wet.” She opened her eyes.
“What?” She looked down at herself. “OH MY GOD, I peed myself.” I laughed I couldn’t help it.
“No Babygirl, I think your water just broke.”
“Wait…what…I’m not due for another week or so.”
“The doctor said it could happen sooner. Have you been having any contractions?”
“I don’t think so. I mean maybe a little bit, I just thought they were Braxton Hicks.”
“Okay, you stay here, I’m going to go change, grab your bag, and some clothes to change into.” I said kissing her forehead.
“No wait, don’t go. I’m not ready. I’m not ready Sebby, it’s going to hurt so bad. The nursery still isn’t ready. We have to wait.”
“Babygirl, it doesn’t work that way. Come on, you’re going to do just fine, you’re going to be so happy when we finally have him in our arms and we bring him home. Focus on that.” She nodded, I could still notice the nervous look in her eyes.
I never thought that I would be the calm one when it came to our child coming into this world. Julia was nervous and scared. After fourteen hours of labor we welcomed Christian Aidan Vanwell into this world. He was 7 pounds 6 ounces, blue eyed, blonde haired little prince.
I didn’t think it was possible to love anyone in this world more than I loved my son. He completed me. He was the missing piece in my heart and soul. The first time I held him I was in complete awe of him. He had such tiny fingers and a fragile body, I investigated his mouth, nose, eyes, trying to decide who he looked like more, Julia or me. I breathed him in and wanted to learn all his sounds and noises. I brought him to my chest and held onto him like I never wanted to let him go.
I looked over at Julia and she was crying. I went to her and laid down next to her, we put Christian in the middle and just sat there in perfect silence, as we embraced our child.
We were a family and I was a father.
<>*<>Y<>*<>
Three more years had gone by and my life got better and better. I had no cause for complaints. I loved being a VIP, if anything I loved it more with every passing day. My life was far from routine and ordinary, it was my life and the only one I knew. I was twenty-three years old and had the world and men at my fingertips. Everything was at my disposal at the drop of a dime.
Never having to worry about anything was my norm. I know some would think that I was cynical, I was living the life that people only dreamed of. I never felt an ounce of regret for the choices that I had made. They made me who I was, and I was motherfucking fantastic.
Madam had become my confidant and mentor. I knew that in many ways I truly was her favorite. I don’t know what it was about me, I could see it in her eyes every time she looked at me. We had this unspoken bond and connection. The other women c
ould see it too, there weren’t any problems though; we were all a family.
The mystery and allure of her was still there, she had broken down some walls with me and I got to know her as a person. She could be a brutal bitch if she needed to be. You made sure to make it point not to cross her. I had seen her in action several times, nobody fucked with Madam. She could ruin you just by smiling.
She not only owned Miami, but it was also worldwide. She always knew what I wanted or needed. She knew that with all of us. It was a sixth sense for her.
Madam loved to keep me busy. You might think that I would become lonely since part of my profession kept me at arm’s length from all of my clients. My job was just to appear that I loved them. It was all a façade and one that I had perfected.
The older I got, the more I started to think about love though. I had seen the look in many of my clients’ eyes when they were with me. I wasn’t shy of hearing them say they wanted to take me away from it all. To give me everything and anything, it became a joke to me after hearing it so many times.
It also became sort of a sick game for me, to see if I could get them to fall in love with me. I enjoyed knowing that I had someone in this world love me. I’m a sadistic bitch, it gave me pleasure, even though I knew I would never reciprocate it. These men thought they knew me, nobody really did. They loved what they thought I was, and I was what they wanted me to be.
I was the fantasy. I was the dream. I was an illusion.
It was easy to become fucked up, when it came to love. Could you really be with one person? Does love truly conquer all?
<>*<>S<>*<>
“Sebastian, Sebby, wake up. You said you would take care of him.”
“What time is it?” I sleepily asked, hearing Christian’s very healthy lungs coming from the baby monitor.
“It’s almost three.”
“In the morning?” I asked, looking over to my wife in our bed, wearing her sexy as hell reading glasses, looking over to me with a frown.
“No Sebby, it’s three in the afternoon, we’re in bed in the middle of the day. Yes, in the morning, now go get your son.”
“Are you going to be working on that case all night? You need to sleep, Babygirl.”
“Sebastian. Get Christian!” she shouted. Damn.
I warmed a bottle, changed a wet diaper, and sat in the glider as I fed my little boy. He looked up to me as he filled his little belly. I hummed a soothing tone until his bottle was empty, and lifted him to my shoulder for a burp. That took two pats to the back. I nestled my cheek next to his soft baby skin and rubbed his back. God, I loved that boy. He was amazing, I couldn’t get enough of him.
“I’m sorry, Sebby,” Julia said from the door. “I’m just stressed about this case and Christian. I’m not sleeping. Being a mom and working full-time is working out a lot harder than I had imagined. I’m still trying to find a healthy balance. I’m sorry I bit your head off, I didn’t mean to. You are amazing with him, there is nothing sexier than seeing you hold our son.”
“Oh yeah, does this baby throw up over my shoulder do it for you, Babygirl?” I chuckled.
“You have no idea.” She smiled.
We put Christian back in his crib and both stared at him intently.
“He looks just like you Sebby, he has your blonde hair and thin lips.” She suggested.
“I don’t see it. I see more of you in him.”
We kissed him goodnight and went back to bed. Julia took off her glasses and laid down next to me.
“Why don’t you sleep naked anymore?” I questioned, looking at her blushing face.
“I don’t know, I got used to sleeping with tank tops on when I was pregnant. It’s only been six months and I haven’t lost all the baby weight yet.”
Julia was intense trying to get back her pre-baby body. She was taking spinning classes like crazy and eating everything green with grilled chicken.
“Babygirl, you gained twenty-five pounds with Christian and you barely weighed 110 as it was before him. You were the hottest pregnant woman I had ever seen. I can’t even tell you’ve had a baby. What are you talking about?”
“Sebby, you’re just being nice. I still can’t fit in my skinny jeans. Well I can if I don’t want to breathe, I still have six more pounds that I have to lose. I want to look good for you and I’m not comfortable yet.”
“Is this why we haven’t made love, with you being naked since Christian was born?”
“Maybe, plus I just finished nursing a month ago. All the milk has finally dried up. My body has gone through a lot of changes, that I just wasn’t expecting.”
“You’re more beautiful to me now, than you have ever been before, Babygirl. You made me a father. You gave me something that I could have never imagined could be any more perfect. He came out of your body. You carried my son and I love you. I don’t care what you look like, even though I feel like you’re being ridiculous you look fucking amazing.”
“I love you, Sebby.” She exclaimed, leaning over to kiss me. I felt her tongue in my mouth and it didn’t take me long to take off her clothes, get her naked, and wet.
I would never get tired of making love to Julia. She did things to me that no other woman could do...or so I thought.
Chapter 13
I was driving home from the airport on a Sunday afternoon. I had just gotten back from a ‘business trip’ with a fairly new client. He was sort of shy and timid and it was a nice change of pace. His wife had left him for her personal trainer and his buddy had bought me for him. I had spent the last three days with a very emotional man.
It was endearing and slightly annoying, but I pulled through. I needed to take my mind off of things, I wasn’t used to being around a man with so many feelings before.
“Hey Kid.” Devon spoke into the phone.
“Hi Doll, whatcha doin’?”
“Not much, just woke up, it was a long night last night.”
“Oh…are you about to start gnawing your arm off, because you’re waking up to a coyote?” I laughed.
“Ha-ha, you’re so funny.”
“And charming.” I stated.
“Ok funny and charming, Ms. Telle, what do I owe the honor of this wonderful wakeup call?”
“Let’s do something. It’s a beautiful day outside, lets go to the beach.”
“Umm…yeah, let me call Christine and let her know I’ll catch up with her later.”
Ugh, Christine was Devon’s new girlfriend. She was a bitch, we hated each other.
“Tell her I said hello.” I stated in a perky voice.
“She’ll love that. Come pick me up in an hour.”
“You bet.” I hung up and went right home to change into a bikini and grab a beach bag. I decided to grab some water and sandwiches for us as well.
I picked him up and he looked messy, Devon could work the messy look like no other. Once we got to the beach it was packed. We picked a secluded spot near the water. We relaxed and talked for about two hours before we decided to go cool off in the ocean, after enjoying the refreshing dip we made our way back to our spot where we ate lunch and talked some more. The afternoon sun was searing on my skin and I wanted to take advantage of it by getting more of a tan.
I leaned forward to untie my top which exposed my breasts, and saw Devon gawking at me.
“Seriously? You’re a pig!”
“I’m a man. It’s in our nature to look at beautiful women. You Ysabelle, are flawless, I’m sure there is no need for me to tell you. You know that’s why Christine hates you. She sees you as competition.” He joked.
“Christine is a Miami whore.” I affirmed with a huge smile.
“She is not. She’s actually a really likeable person if you would care enough to get to know her. I think you guys might actually like each other if you gave yourselves half the chance.”
“Mmm hmm, I’ll get right on that.” I grinned, and he nudged my shoulder with his.
“What’s new Kid? Any love life updates I need t
o know about? You breaking hearts?”
“Oh you know me…I love them and leave them.” He chuckled shaking his head.
“So this Christine bitch…you love her?”
“Hmm…I don’t know if it’s love yet, it could be. I enjoy spending time with her and I’m going to be thirty-seven soon, don’t really want to die alone.”
“Oh, I get it you’re settling.” He laughed hard enough for his head to jeer back.
“Only you would twist my words like that. What is it with you and love Kid? You’re fucking jaded about it.”
“I’m not jaded about shit, I just think it’s a waste of time and energy. There are much more things in this life that don’t include love. If you really think about it, it’s actually just a hormone release of a chemical kind of like a drug. What do drugs eventually do, Devon? They wear off!”
“That’s the biggest load of bullshit that I’ve ever heard. You have serious issues with letting anyone in, even me and I’ve known you for five years. I take you as you are. At first it bothered me, and then I accepted that it’s who you are. I imagine it has to do something with your upbringing. I’ve never met one family member of yours and you skipped town when you were sixteen that tells me something. I’m not a fucking idiot, I can put two and two together.”
“So how’s the bar doing?” I veered off trying to do anything to avoid having this conversation.
He looked at me and shook his head in disappointment.
“The bar is great. Anything that includes alcohol will be successful on South Beach.”
“The rich and the lonely.” I chucked.
“Are you lonely?” He said raising an eyebrow at me.
“No.” I reminded.
“No?” As is calling my bluff, he was starting to piss me off.
“What the fuck, Devon? What’s your problem?”
“I don’t have a problem. It’s a simple question. Why can’t you answer it?”
“I did.”
“You never answer anything, Kid. It’s actually quite annoying. I mean when are you going to let me in? What the fuck do I have to do, huh? Give you a job, a place to live, a friendship…oh wait? I’ve done all that!” He shouted.