He was going nuts. He needed her touch, her warmth, her body.
Nick brought himself to the limit of his endurance and worked out till he dropped from exhaustion.
It was the only way to ease his constant arousal every time he thought of Jenna.
***
When Jenna entered the house that night, she immediately sought out Nick. Gracie was at the café, and wouldn’t be home until after one a.m.
It was good to have a night off. Jenna slipped off her sneakers and socks, wiggled her toes, and headed toward the dining room.
How natural it had felt in the past few weeks to have him close.
Don’t get used to it, she reminded herself.
But she felt good tonight, and wasn’t going to dwell on the past. She wanted his company and wasn’t going to restrict herself from talking to Nick and enjoying it.
The tantalizing scent from the two brick oven pizzas she'd made in the café immediately filled the rooms with melted cheese, spices and tomato sauce. Placing the pies on the dining room table, she decided to take a shower, then call Nick and they'd share the pizza.
Hurrying into her bedroom, she heard Nick coming from his room, and froze. He was wearing a towel around his waist and one around his neck.
Now what, Jenna? Make up your mind. He's inviting you to touch him, take him.
"Do I smell pizza?"
"You do." She moved closer to him. "So if you're hungry, just let me…."
He lassoed his towel around her neck and pulled her in.
"Oh I'm hungry alright," he murmured, whispering and nibbling at her ear.
Jenna's heart beat so loud, it was a wonder he didn’t hear it.
He smelled of soap and shampoo, and his chest was muscular, tight, and ripped.
His shoulder was a little red. A small scar was visible, but he didn’t look any the worse for wear.
"What do you say we have a banquet of our own, hmm?"
Run, Jenna, don’t do it. This will only make things harder once he goes back to California.
Tell him….but only one word came out of her mouth.
"Yes…"
He backed her into her bedroom. It was late fall and already dark, lending the moon shadows to her window. Just enough light for them to see each other.
He backed her into the bed, she felt the mattress hit the back of her legs.
"Nico…" she was at a loss for anything more than his name.
"I know baby. I want you more than I want to breathe right now."
She took the initiative because if she didn’t, she'd run. She unhooked the towel from his waist, threw it on the floor, next to the towel he'd hooked her with.
Looking down she spied his erection, stiff, long and hard, and ached for him. He was hers for the asking.
"My turn."
He lifted the sweat shirt from her, threw it across the room, then unsnapped and unzipped her jeans, while his mouth crushed hers, taking her breath from her lungs.
His palms caressed and rubbed her breasts through her thin lace bra, making her cry out. Her nipples tightened to hard points when he squeezed them through the fabric.
"I missed your body, loved always your breasts. Fit so perfectly in my hands."
His hands slid down her tummy, and came to her navel ring, which was actually a tiny gold baseball.
He fell to his knees to check it out. "I'll be damned. How long have you had this?"
She felt herself blush. "After you left for college. Before the accident."
He tenderly kissed her navel, then gently fingered the ball. "And you never got rid of it," he said almost to himself.
"No, Nico, I never did."
He pulled her jeans off, her thong with it, and he stayed on his knees, kissing her thighs and the V between her legs.
"I want to taste you."
She nodded, dug her fingers into his scalp, and braced herself for his onslaught.
He gently divided her legs, and buried his tongue into the heart of her.
"Nico, Nico…." Was all she was capable of.
"Come for me, Jen. God I missed you, missed your taste, your heat. Go over for me now, and I'll catch up, I swear I'll catch you."
He rubbed the tiny skin in the hood of her womanhood while his tongue, and then two fingers dove into her, making her wetter, hotter, wilder.
"Almost there, come on Jen, come on."
And then she approached the crest, and Jenna took it. Higher and higher, his tongue and magical fingers took her over and over, till she broke apart in his arms. Nick caught her when her legs couldn’t support her weight. He gently placed her on the bed and followed her down.
He held her tight through the racking tremors of her body, kissing her face, murmuring things he was going to do to her.
He lifted himself over her and settled himself between her legs. She could feel the tip of his erection touching the heart of her.
He belonged there, she told herself, as she kissed him, reveled in his mouth and lips, swirled her tongue around his, and encircled his beautiful shoulders, pulling him down to join his flesh with hers.
They lay face to face in the dimness of the room, moonlight making its way onto the bed, as if the bed were lit by the rays.
"Tell me we don’t belong like this, Jen. Tell me this is wrong, that we've missed so much these past years. Please tell me this is where you need to be. With me."
She couldn’t deny it any longer. She loved him. Never stopped loving him. She was going to tell him the truth. She felt better knowing the truth would be out and whatever happened, she would be free of the guilt and lies and secrets she’d kept all these years.
Nico deserved to know everything, and she was going to tell him.
But not now.
"Nico, I need you," was all she said.
And parting her legs, lifting her hips, where he palmed her ass and pulled her into him, she was home. “Nico, make love to me."
"Are you sure?"
She nodded then pulled his head down to hers. "Very."
In one long stroke, he was inside her heat. His mouth trailed from her mouth to her chin, to her neck and then her breasts.
She lifted her hips higher to gain better access to him, while his tongue and lips sipped and sucked at her breasts, feasting on her like one of her gourmet Italian dishes.
Ecstasy gripped her while her body rocked from his strokes. Nico was a powerful man, muscular and fit, and the strength of him pushing into her in hard sure strokes, had her crying out in pleasure.
"You feel so good," he whispered, threading his fingers through her hair, then taking her hands and wrapping them around the bedpost, along with his own.
"I need you Jen. I've always needed you. Always loved you…always."
She heard his words and tears slid from her eyes unheeded. She answered him as she began to come.
"Love you, Nico. Never stopped loving you."
"Now, baby," he breathed, stroking faster, harder, hotter, the bedpost hitting the wall while they clasped hands.
She knew he was close, and her body reacted the only way it knew how.
Jenna came answering his kisses, crying out as tears slid down her cheeks as the moonlight shone on them.
***
Sated, exhausted and happier than he'd ever been, Nick rolled off her and gathered her in his arms.
"Better than against a wall in the café, right?"
"And more comfortable for your shoulder too I'm sure."
He looked at her. "This changes things, you know that, don’t you?"
She nodded. "Yes, we have a lot to talk about. I need to tell you something, Nick."
"Me first. I'm starving."
Jenna frowned at him. "I bought pizza from the café, but first, you really need to hear this."
Finally, he thought. Nick felt, rather than saw her demeanor change. "Oh sure, baby, I'm sorry. I really don’t want to leave the bed. It feels so good to have you with me. Tell me, what is it?"
He
sat up with her in his arms, and fixed the pillows behind their heads.
"Talk to me. Whatever it is you have to tell me, bring it on."
Jenna shook her head and kissed him, her mouth warm and soft. "It can wait till we eat. I'll bring in the pizza and wine and we'll eat in bed. What do you say?"
"Thank you for spoiling me, and the answer's yes."
She brought in the pizza on two large platters. They sat crossed legged on the bed, enjoyed the tasty dinner, and shared a bottle of wine.
After leaving the bedroom to bring the plates and wine glasses into the kitchen, Jenna re-entered the room, where Nick was sitting up in bed, waiting for her. She swallowed hard and stood at the food of the bed. "Nico, I'd like to talk to you now."
Nick nodded. "Ok, Red, I'm all ears."
Drowsiness, like a veil, covered Nick as he listened to the steady, even tone of her voice. The wine, coupled with his strenuous workouts, left him fairly exhausted. He yawned and thought, I'll just close my eyes for a minute.
***
"I was ready to come back to you Nico, when we were in the accident," she took a deep breath and exhaled, facing away from him, staring out the window. "By the time I was lucid enough to get in touch with you, you were on your way to California."
Jenna let the words pour out as she focused on a point beyond the trees in the back yard. "My parents were dead, Gracie had a head injury and fell into a coma, and I was all alone with two broken legs."
She kept staring out the window. "There were complications, Nico. I was….bleeding, hemorrhaging."
A single tear slid down her cheek. "I was pregnant, Nico, with our baby. I had a miscarriage after the accident. And I didn’t tell you because you'd come to Italy. You were going to give up your shot to play baseball, to realize your dream and I couldn’t allow that."
She waited for the outburst that she knew surely would come. Yet the room was silent. Jenna turned around to face him.
He'd fallen asleep. Jenna covered her eyes and let the tears fall. I'll tell him in the morning.
Finding the hospital records to show to Nick in the morning, she placed them on the kitchen counter, under her bag and house keys.
Mentally and physically exhausted, she settled in the bed next to Nick, and looked at him, so relaxed and handsome in sleep. I love you so much Nico. This would probably be the last time she'd be this close to him. When he found out about the baby he'd never forgive her.
***
The blaring sound of sirens roused Nick from sleep. He opened his eyes, and yawned, then turned his head to see Jenna on her side, facing him. He loved her, loved waking up next to her, and realized he wanted to be with her for the rest of his life. He was going to ask her to marry him again. Finally that void inside him had been filled by Jenna.
The last thing he'd remembered was Jen talking about the accident in Italy. Nick smiled, flexing his shoulder and noting the pain had lessened in the past few weeks to a slight twinge. Must be the workouts and exhausting rehab. He quickly decided to take a shave and a shower, then go for a quick walk to loosen up before Jenna woke up.
He gently pushed an errant strand off her face, and placed a slight kiss on those luscious lips of hers, then soundlessly made his way to the bathroom.
Feeling refreshed, Nick got dressed and decided to walk to the local bakery for fresh crumb buns for breakfast. He remembered Jenna mentioning ordering all her pastries and cakes for the cafe from Barelli's Bakery.
Entering the kitchen, he spied her keys and purse on a manila folder resting on the counter near the front door. He pushed aside her huge black leather bag, but when he grabbed the house keys the folder fell, the pages floating like leaves caught in a breeze.
"Shit." Nick bent over to pick up the papers, intent on placing them back on the counter the way he found them.
But he froze when a word on one of those pages hit him like a punch to the gut.
Miscarriage.
***
Jenna felt liked she was being watched. Nick was standing at the foot of the bed, his eyes dark and empty. Clutched in his closed hand, the manila envelope she'd left on the counter. He'd found the medical records. It was over.
"Nico, I told you last night, but you'd fallen asleep."
"How convenient," he snapped, eyes wide, nostrils flaring.
She slid off the bed, wrapped the sheet around her. The room suddenly seemed to close in on her.
He dug his hands through his hair. "You kept this from me all these years?"
He backed away from her as she held out her hand. "Nico, please, sit down. I'll tell you everything."
"Now you want to talk? No thanks, I think I'll stand." His arms crossed over his heaving naked chest, his sweats sat low on his hips. He was beautiful and enraged and Jenna knew he'd never forgive her.
"I don't even know what to say to you, Jen." He began to pace, and Jenna knew the consequences for this secret betrayal would not end well. The room still held a hint of their lovemaking. And Nico hated her.
He interrupted his pacing and shook his head. His eyes were dark pools of emptiness. His voice cracked with sadness or anger, Jenna couldn’t figure out which. "Why, Jen? Why didn’t you call and tell me this happened?"
Vulnerability a living thing, Jenna held the sheet tighter around her bareness. "Yes, I was wrong. Yes, I should have called you. You're right, but by the time I was lucid enough to absorb the news of all that had happened, you were already in California." Her tears choked her, her throat burned and her words came out hoarse, pained, filled with sadness and regret.
Nick stood there, straight and still as stone. "You could have had a doctor call me. I could have made arrangements to bring you to California. I don't play baseball all year long, Jenna. I could have flown to Naples to at least see you, know you were alive. But instead, you lost our baby and made the sole decision to keep it a secret from me. How could you?"
She pushed her hair from her forehead. "And do what? I couldn’t walk for a long time. Gracie was almost killed."
"Our baby was killed. What was Gracie doing driving the car that day anyway? I'd told you time and time again, she wasn’t ready. But you…"
Jenna watched as reality dawned on him. Grace had been only sixteen when the accident occurred. He took one step forward. Jenna swayed and gripped the bed post; it was useless to stop the tears now. He knew.
"It was you. You were driving."
It was as much an accusation as an angry revelation.
"Yes, I was driving. I never told you, too much guilt, sadness. I'll never be able to make it up to you. Maybe someday you can find it in your heart to forgive me."
Nick rubbed his face with his good hand, as if trying to wipe the anger and sadness away. Jenna thought he was going to say something, but all he did was shake his head and walk from the room.
He slammed the door behind him, leaving her lost and defeated. She'd lost Nico all over again.
He came out of the bedroom ten minutes later, completely dressed, luggage dragged to the front door.
"I called a cab. I'm going back to California tonight. I can't talk to you while I'm like this, Jen. I hurt too much."
There was nothing to say. Her chest ached, her head pounded and her leg throbbed with pain.
Jenna watched as he reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a black velvet box. "I was going to give you this and ask you to come back to California with me."
He threw the tiny square black velvet case to her. She caught it and her hands shook as she looked at him.
"You can have it. I don’t want it back. Pawn it, sell it, I don’t care."
She did open it. A beautiful solitaire diamond winked back at her surrounded by smaller stones. It was beautiful, but she couldn’t speak.
His voice broke as he closed the distance between them, but he didn’t touch her. "I love you. I've always loved you. And I don’t know what to do about it. Right now I can't forgive you for not telling me about the baby, for not lovin
g me enough to trust me. I don’t care where I was. I would have come."
"I didn’t want you to come."
He shook his head as if he'd heard wrong. "What?"
"I did what was best for you, for both of us."
"Yeah well do me a favor; don’t make decisions for me."
A horn honked in the distance and Nick headed for the door. "I'm breaking up inside, Jenna. Honestly I don’t know what I'm going to do. But right now, I'm going back to my place in California, and see if I have a career left."
"I'm sorry Nico," she barely whispered.
"Yeah," he nodded, swiped at his face, at what Jenna guessed was a tear. "So am I."
CHAPTER ELEVEN
After spending all night at Newark airport, Nick finally boarded a flight to California in the early morning hours. He walked into his apartment, a myriad of emotions flooding him.
The woman he'd found after twelve years and had fallen in love with all over again, had kept a secret from him.
They'd lost a child.
He dropped all luggage in the middle of his massive living room, stripped off his sports jacket, then entered his bedroom and collapsed onto his bed from exhaustion.
Closing his eyes, visions of Jenna still plagued him. Haunted by the sight of her writhing in his arms in the midst of pleasure and ecstasy, kissing him with those luscious lips, he missed her already.
Nick loved her, hated her. He wanted to be free of her.
Seeking the oblivion of nothingness, he slept deeply until the next morning, feeling even worse than before.
He stripped and stepped under the cool spray of the shower, still wearing the scent of her on his skin from the day before. Memories of their lovemaking gripped him. Maybe the shock of cold water would help wash the recollections of Jenna away from his heart.
Playing for Keeps/Body Check (Rules of the Game) Page 6