by Lisa Rector
“I hear you, Einion,” answered a quiet, melodic, unfamiliar voice—not in his mind but in the next chamber.
Startled at her understanding of his thoughts, he whispered. “Who are you?” His voice would not go any louder, and movement of his broken jaw splintered agony through his head.
“Meinwen would know me.”
Silence… while Einion connected the dots. Someone Meinwen would know, from long ago. The emrys who’d left Gorlassar. Meinwen’s granddaughter.
“You’re Siana,” he mumbled through his lips, not moving his jaw.
“Yes.”
Einion studied her light with his mind. Despite this dark corner of the world, she shone like the sun.
“How do you stay so…?”
“How do I stay so bright among all this wickedness?” Siana asked.
“Yes.” Einion still had not moved. He didn’t try to lift his head.
With a swish of cloth across the floor, Siana knelt beside him. Her hand touched his jaw, and he felt heat mending it so he could speak. Her hands lifted his head and placed a cup to his lips. “Drink. I’ll help you.”
“How…?” Einion asked after he sipped the sweet water.
“You find a place within yourself. Guard it from the outside world. You will find, though chaos may ensue around you, you’ll be centered and steadfast. It took me years to learn that, Einion.”
“Won’t you be in trouble?”
“No one will know I’m here. I have abilities, able to cloak my presence from others. I’ll fix your body, though your heart will have to mend on its own.”
Siana gently laid his head back down. One hand lay on his heart and the other on his forehead. Einion closed his eyes and fell into a soothing, warm heat that crept over his whole body. He felt his flesh becoming whole, one component at a time, one beat of life into each fiber. Siana was a master at this, he knew, more so than when Einion had laid his hands on Rhianu to heal her from her lightning strike. The healing flowed out of Siana with grace from the Master of Light.
When it was done, Einion sat up and thanked her. Siana waved him off. “The pleasure was mine. I can see she loves you, Einion. Though her actions might say otherwise, this experience has changed her.”
Einion looked at this emrys. She had golden blonde hair and the green eyes typical of so many of them. Her porcelain features and her face shone with a beauty Einion recognized in the earlier generations. Siana was mature in age, though she looked like a young woman. She smiled at him, and her eyes twinkled from a ball of light Siana floated in the air. She sat cross-legged in a plain dress that did not detract from her glory.
“She doesn’t want the child. She said the pregnancy was a punishment.” Einion couldn’t hide the sorrow in his voice. “She’s gone to me.”
“I think given the choice, she’d choose you and the child.”
“What makes you sure?” Einion couldn’t hide his bitterness. Rhianu spent months lying to him. He couldn’t see how he could ever trust her again.
“Tell me of your relationship with my daughter, young king, and I’ll tell you of hope in return.”
Her daughter. Of course Rhianu was Siana’s daughter. Rhianu must be older than he thought.
“Yes, Rhianu is my daughter. Please…” Siana gestured to him.
Einion closed his eyes. It hurt to relive the details. He fought within himself, trying to push the heartache away as he thought back to that fateful meeting. “I will tell you from the first day.”
He talked for many long minutes about every single detail he could recount of his time with Rhianu, from the joy they had found in their friendship, to the sadness over the girl’s death, to the explosion of shame over the kiss they shared. Einion spoke with his eyes closed, holding the memories in front of his mind, baring his soul for this emrys to see. He found his voice became weak again, and he couldn’t hold back the tears. Einion wept in front of Siana, this stranger who’d be his child’s grandmother.
Einion stopped, and silence filled the room. Siana passed him the cup of water again, and he drank with deep gulps.
“Why didn’t I listen to the warnings in my heart?” Einion mumbled after he swallowed. “Why didn’t I guard myself against this loss?”
“You saw Rhianu for more than her past. You saw her for who she could be.”
“I was a fool.”
“I promised I would tell you of hope.” Siana touched his hand. “I must start from the beginning, Einion. You have told your story, and so I shall share another.
“All beings born into this world have light. The Master of Light bid it to be so with all his creations. Some beings have more light than others do, and where less light exists, darkness holds the place like a void. For you see, darkness is nothing, space waiting, hoping to be filled with light someday. The simplicity of the principle is thus, light shines into space, filling it up. Darkness cannot exist where light does. You open a door and light shines through it; darkness does not. Does this make sense so far?”
“Yes, lessons I’ve been taught since I was a child.”
“Good. Mortal men are born with this light.”
Einion looked at her, unbelieving.
“Yes, I see your skepticism,” Siana said. “With mortal men, the level is imperceptible to most, but it’s there. Meinwen would see it. Within the emrys, you’re able to see this light.
“Being born with light doesn’t mean you’re always good, and having darkness in you doesn’t make you bad. Carrying light can’t keep you from making mistakes or from choosing wrong. We all have agency. But this First Evil, the voice that whispers to men, tempting them, convincing them of another way—this Evil is the influence that gives the darkness depth, making it tangible. Until a person gives in to that tempting, that whisper, their darkness is a void of nothing.”
Einion indicated that Siana should go on.
“The Dark Master preys on the confusion in the half-emrys, the constant unbalance between light and darkness. Thus he’s able to wield them as weapons, unlike the mortal men. I could not become his vessel because I carried no darkness in me, but I took a husband, a mortal man, and introduced the flaw into my bloodline. Rhianu was the first half-emrys. The Dark Master chose her, and she was a willing participant. Rhianu loved the strength she felt when the Evil bestowed some of his power into her. She conquered this land of mortal men with her half-emryn army.”
Siana paused.
“Where did this army come from?” Einion asked.
“I had seven children, and each child in turn had children, and so on. It took hundreds of years for Rhianu’s army to grow, but it did. I regretted my choice in following the voice of the Dark Master. I still remember that day, standing on the ledge in the mortal realm and hearing his voice whisper to me—”
Einion’s eyebrows lifted. His voice whispers. He knew how the Shadow slipped deceit into thoughts.
“—because in the mortal world all are subject to his influence. The voice spoke of wisdom and power that I could only dream of, and I was young and impulsive and seeking adventure, so I followed it here. My actions led me to destruction and death. But I would not leave my children, so I stayed.”
The horror.
“Until Rhianu took the light, I’d been close to giving up many times. When she assumed the guise, I hoped Rhianu would return to a Half-Emrys of Light, but she needs to rid herself of the power from the Evil to make the change. If that influence were severed from her, she might be able to make the choice.”
“Are you saying: if the Evil were taken from her, and she made the choice to return to light, she could become a Half-Emrys of Light again?” Einion asked.
“Yes.”
“When I met her, she had a lot of light inside her. Meinwen mentioned she had evil as well, and I knew it was different from my darkness.”
“Rhianu had forced the power into her mind, so her body was empty. I gave her my light to fill the space. The light was a guise, and as soon as the Evil erupted aga
in, it took over.”
“So how do we do this? Do you know a way?” Einion found a slight hope in that burning pit in his chest. “Is there a way to help Rhianu?”
“I know a way, but it would be at a great cost. What are you willing to give up for your child and its mother?”
“Anything, I would do anything.”
“Do you love her, Einion?”
Do I love Rhianu? Einion wasn’t entirely sure. He cared for her, yes. But love? After her betrayal? Einion shrugged. “You can read my feelings. You know how I feel about Rhianu.”
“I want you to say it to me. What are your feelings for my daughter? Would you give your life so she and the child could be free?”
Give his life? For his child, yes. For Rhianu? His heart was bitter. He had counted her as a friend. A close confidant. Einion thought of the images Rhianu had shown him of the night they shared, forced upon them by fey magic. But he saw how he tenderly touched her. He felt how she had responded and how she succumbed to the magic—not because the magic made her, but because she wanted it. She believed that with his touch she was his. But it had been deeper than that. Einion had initially missed a connection that night due to the effects of the fey. He swallowed. Master of Light, could it be that she does still love me—beyond the physical, above the betrayal?
He had desired her at one point in time. The kiss he’d stolen from her lingered on his lips. The unforgettable divot of her lips… but this was lust. Einion knew this. Lust was not love. Einion closed his eyes and thought back through everything he told Siana. He and Rhianu had laughed together.
He had trusted her.
But wasn’t that belief in her broken?
Trust can be repaired. You can heal from this.
Einion shouldn’t have been able to say the words turning at the edge of his mind, but he found them leaving his mouth before he could stop them. “Yes, Siana, I love Rhianu. I would give my life for her.”
He felt it then. By saying those words, all the confusion left. He knew they were true.
Siana smiled, and lines crinkled around her eyes. “Good. I know a place not far from here. I can take you there. It lies deep underground. The passages are treacherous with trials to overcome because of the magic that guards the way, but in its depths is a chamber where the Dark Master is imprisoned. Touch your hands to his prison barrier, and the power will be transferred from Rhianu to you.”
“How’s that possible?”
“The Dark Master gives his power to only one. You can take it from Rhianu, and she will be left with only her light and darkness. Cysgod’s essence will not be in her, but in you.”
“You expect me to become the Vessel?”
“Yes, to save her. It’s the only way. The power cannot be forced from her or released from her. It can only be taken.”
“Why does Meuric not have the power? Can’t he take it from Rhianu?”
“He doesn’t want it. He’s seen what the power’s done to his sister. He despises it.”
“If he despises it, then why’s he never done this for Rhianu?”
“Meuric has tragedies in his past that he cannot face. Were he to take the Dark Master’s power, he fears what this would do to him. He’d find no way back.”
“And you think that I can fight my way back from this power?” Einion asked.
“I have faith that you will.”
“Because of my light.”
“Because of your light and your love for Rhianu.”
“My love for Rhianu? If what you say is true, it sounds as if Meuric has just as much love for his sister.”
“He’s always been loyal to Rhianu and never sought the power for himself. But believe me, Einion. Meuric has suffered far worse than you know. I cannot ask this of him.”
“So you want me to have compassion for the man who beat me to near death.”
“Yes.”
“Is everything always black and white with you?”
“Yes.”
Einion wished he had half the faith that Siana had in her misguided children. “Well, Meuric certainly found great satisfaction in taking his displeasure out on my hide.”
“Meuric is a formidable man. But he loves Rhianu. I witnessed a tender parting between them before Rhianu left Morvith. He too stays for her. I have no doubt if circumstances were different, he would forsake this life of darkness.”
“You have such hope for your children. Why did you not act before?”
“I was weak,” Siana said. “And afraid to face my wrongdoings. I didn’t always choose the right. Just because I carry light inside, doesn’t mean I’ll use my agency for good. I’ve had plenty of things to atone for. I’m still atoning for them. I’ll see this through to the end. I’m determined to make restitution.”
“Meinwen would say there’s always hope, there’s always forgiveness.”
“Indeed she would.” Siana smiled, as if thinking of some old memory. “Oh, how I miss her and my father and mother. I shouldn’t have left Gorlassar. But I cannot find the way home now. I destroyed that part of my memory to protect the dragons.”
Einion grabbed her hand. “I’ll take you. It’s time to go home, Siana. Home.”
She nodded, and Einion knew she was choked up.
“I think we’ve been sitting idle long enough. Show me the way.” Einion rose to his feet and extended a hand.
“You did not ask what would happen to you once you became the Vessel. Aren’t you afraid of what it might do to you?” Siana asked.
Einion didn’t have to inquire. He could only imagine every horror, every ugly, impure emotion—everything he feared coming to life. He’d become the darkness that haunted him, the darkness he couldn’t separate from himself. Already a part of him, it would become magnified beyond comprehension. Death would be better.
“I will trust, Siana, if you can’t find a way to free me after your daughter and grandchild are well away from here, I give you permission to end my life.”
“Let us hope it does not come to that.”
Einion narrowed his eyes. “Agreed.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
THE PRICE
The strength and the power the evil gave Rhianu almost restored her to her former self. Confidence focused her mind. Rhianu was glad to be rid of all those months clouded from memory loss, unsure of who she was, grappling in the dark, and playing with the feeble light. Except… she had been wounded. Love. Bah! It was a pox—a festering pox that would take a long time to heal, resulting in an ugly scar. Rhianu hoped her feelings would go away, but the repercussion grew inside her.
Barely over a month along, she felt an annoyance at this baby in her womb. Weakness. Meuric looked at her differently, as though she might rupture. Perhaps he felt she was unworthy. Meuric had softened toward her once he understood this was a punishment. He’d tell himself she deserved it. But this love she held for Einion… Rhianu had been upset when Meuric beat Einion to near death, but she resisted the urge to go to him, purposely distancing herself and hoping, with time, her feelings would fade.
Rhianu drummed the table with her fingers, having picked up this bad habit from Meuric. He and several of his captains sat with her in the council room and gave report on the ranks and units assembled. The men were making the final preparations to fly into battle.
Her irritation was not from the tedium of the meeting. It would be short and to the point. But Rhianu couldn’t escape this feeling, this sensation—this agitation under her skin. Her drumming grew louder.
Meuric lifted his eyebrows at her and cleared his throat. Rhianu caught his gaze and scowled at him. When had he started to treat her as though he were the older sibling? I knew it. He had lost faith in her and her abilities.
I don’t think that’s it, Aerona said.
Where’s this irritation coming from? She would like to stand and sink her fingernails into the flesh of the man droning on. If Meuric doesn’t look down on me, then what is it?
Misplaced guilt. You’
re feeling guilty over what you’ve done to Einion.
Over what I’ve done! You were on board with the plan. You supported me in this. You wanted to come home to Morvith just as I did.
Yes. But I’ve accepted what you cannot. You’re fighting so hard not to love Einion.
Why are you defending this? This is treason!
I FEEL you. I feel your love for Einion. It’s pressing into ME, Rhianu! How did you think your dragon sister would react? Confront these emotions and accept them.
Don’t they disgust you?
No, Rhianu, they don’t. You’re going to be a mother.
You want me to be a mother? But I’m the Vessel. I’m the chosen one. He wants me. I am his. I do his will. A child is not in his plan.
Then why did he punish you in this way?
It was a test. It’s always a test. I am loyal to him—
Because you want the power. Because you want to conquer the world. What good is the world if you don’t have love?
Rhianu slammed her fist down on the table and stood.
The room fell silent.
So now you’re on board with love. Aerona, how dare you defy me in this! We are one heart. One mind.
Sometimes the heart is confused. The mind might be logical, but the heart needs help. I’m helping you see another way.
Meuric stood and moved to Rhianu’s side. “Your Highness?”
He always maintained proper decorum in front of his men, but right now Rhianu slayed him with her eyes. “Silence!” She screamed this at Meuric and at Aerona and at the whole confounded world.
Rhianu closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and backpedaled. They were going into battle. Her men didn’t need to see how unstable she was.
“So that’s it? Meuric, you can handle the rest from here. You know my wishes.”
“Yes, Your Highness.” He nodded at her.
Rhianu turned to leave. All the men in the room stood as she left. Rhianu had enough of this planning, enough of this guilt, enough of this fuming. Tomorrow, they’d be flying out. First Rolant would fall and then the rest. Slaughter would commence—glorious, bloody slaughter—and the ground would bleed. One enterprise could steady Rhianu, and that was battle.