GIDEON . . .
Jamie was heartsick with longing for the quiet, handsome wrangler who’d somehow gone from her best friend to someone she couldn’t live without. But she didn’t regret it.
Why did he have to be so perfect? If only he was a jerk like every other guy she’d known, then she could flip him off and forget him.
Her face burned when she remembered the look on his face after she’d kissed him last Christmas. How deliberately he’d avoided her eyes, as if even that intimacy was too much. How carefully he’d chosen his tone, his words, as if afraid she would clasp them to her love-sick bosom and interpret even the slightest kindness as an admission of adoration.
Aw, James, no.
And he’d given her the old slug on the arm, like she was a buddy, a pal, a chum.
Okay, maybe he was a jerk after all.
So he was a little older than her, so they were different. She made him smile, loosened up that tight armor of his, made him laugh now and then, even. And his calm demeanor settled her somehow.
This was his fault. He’d made her fall in love with him. So one of two things had to happen now. Either she had to fall out of love with him.
Or he had to fall into love with her.
Books by Roxanne Snopek
The Sunset Bay Series
SUNSET BAY SANCTUARY
DRIFTWOOD CREEK
BLACKBERRY COVE
(coming in January 2019!)
Published by Kensington Publishing Corporation
DRIFTWOOD CREEK
ROXANNE SNOPEK
ZEBRA BOOKS
KENSINGTON PUBLISHING CORP.
http://www.kensingtonbooks.com
All copyrighted material within is Attributor Protected.
Table of Contents
GIDEON . . .
Also by
Title Page
Copyright Page
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Epilogue
Teaser chapter
ZEBRA BOOKS are published by
Kensington Publishing Corp.
119 West 40th Street
New York, NY 10018
Copyright © 2018 by Roxanne Snopek
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ISBN: 978-1-4201-4423-9
eISBN-13: 978-1-4201-4426-0
eISBN-10: 1-4201-4426-X
For Ray, forever and always
Chapter One
The New Moon in Aries is a time of great
beginnings.
—Jamie’s horoscope
Jamie Vaughn believed in signs. They were scattered across the universe like cosmic kitty litter, a nudge here, a suggestion there, a roadblock somewhere else. Or, if you weren’t paying attention, the occasional punch to the gut.
Jamie meant to pay attention. She tried. But fortune favored the pigheaded, and decades of elbows-up, barge-in-and-take-it was proving tougher to shake than nicotine.
Her abs were rock-solid from all the gut-punches.
However, almost twenty-six seemed a good age for personal growth so she put on her toughest don’t-care face, shoved her hands into the back pockets of her skinny jeans, and planted her boots squarely in the doorway of the kennel room, determined to get her way.
Haylee looked up from the grooming table where she was brushing Jewel, her Labrador-cross therapy dog. Pregnancy made her look round and cute and soft but Jamie knew that was an illusion.
“You’re about to pop, Haylee.”
As announcements went, it was worse than unnecessary. The quick flare of Haylee’s nostrils told Jamie it was also unwelcome and unappreciated. Not her best opening move.
“I’ve got eight weeks to go. That’s nowhere near popping.” She stuck out her lip and blew a blond curl off her face. “Grab a brush. How does this dog get so much junk in her coat on a thirty minute beach walk?”
“It’s a mystery to all.” Jamie joined her at the table, and began detangling the big dog’s back end.
Determined.
Tough.
Strategic.
“I have a proposition, Haylee.” She took a deep breath and dove in. “I want to take over the program while you’re on maternity leave.”
Haylee’s hand stilled. “We’ve talked about this. Companions with Purpose is my baby.”
Jamie had once dreamed of being a police K9 handler, but EX plus CON equalled a roadblock even Attila couldn’t conquer. Training dogs at Sanctuary Ranch was her lifeline, her chance to get past the screw-ups she’d weaseled under, skated over, slipped around. To catch her breath from the gut-punch that kept on giving.
“I want more than hosing down kennels and exercising the boarders. I’m a good trainer. You said it yourself.”
“You’re a natural, but—”
“I understand suspending the classes.” She didn’t. “But at least continue the therapy visits. Jewel’s slobbery kisses might be the only thing keeping some of those old geezers alive. Let me help. I’ve seen you getting in and out of a car. Juggling the leash, your purse, your keys, your emergency underwear. It’s not pretty.”
“No fair.” Haylee pointed the slicker brush at her. “Let’s see you watch Bridesmaids with a five-pound fetus dancing on your bladder.”
Humor was a good sign.
Jamie switched to a wider-toothed comb, counted down from ten, then took fresh aim.
“Aiden thinks you’re overworking yourself, you know. He told me. In fact, he kind of appointed me your guardian angel.”
Truth was a fluid thing, Jamie believed, that the interpretation of facts changed according to the lens of the viewer. And what she’d said could have been true.
“Aiden thinks I need an angel?” Haylee met her eyes, gave a slow blink. “With Olivia and Daphne already vying for godmother, the last thing I need is more hovering.”
Jewel yipped and Haylee dropped the comb. “Sorry, baby, that was a bad tangle.”
“Mommy’s mean, isn’t she?” Jamie fished a piece of freeze-dried liver from the treat jar, fed it to Jewel, then stroked the greying muzzle.
“You’ll mi
ss your visiting, won’t you, Ju-Jube? But it’ll be okay. You’re probably tired of all that helping anyway. You’re an old dog, you’ve earned your retirement.”
“Passive aggressive.” Haylee flicked a chunk of bramble-laden fur into the trash. “Nice.”
“Active aggressive isn’t working so shit-hot. A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.”
The laugh she tagged onto the end sounded as fake as her boot-black hair. Pathetic. But she couldn’t help herself.
Haylee ran one hand over Jewel’s coat, checking for more burrs. “You were hired for the kitchen. I already take too much of your time.”
“Wow, low blow.” She handed Haylee a spray bottle of coat conditioner. “All those hormones must be poisoning your brain. You used to love me.”
“I still love you. But I’m hot and fat and my back hurts.” Haylee ran the back of her hand over her forehead. “Everything but the boarding kennel is on hold for now. Therapy visits. Rescues. Training. We’ll revisit your role when I’ve figured out life with a new baby.”
A scuffing noise sounded beyond them, and a long, tall shadow flickered through the sunshine.
Gideon.
Jamie’s heart lurched like a newborn foal.
“Hi,” she said. It came out like a gunshot and she felt blood rush into her cheeks. She’d been fine for a whole year. More than that. Then one day, that rough voice sent tremors to the pit of her stomach and just like that, she lost her mind. She didn’t know where to put her hands or what to say. Her feet got big. Her mouth got bigger. She forgot how to breathe.
“Ladies,” he said, tipping his hat and giving them that slow, narrow-eyed smile. “You’re looking lovely today, Haylee.”
“No ladies here. We’re women.” Jamie tossed her head, which felt like it weighed fifty pounds, and her hat fell off. “Oops.”
Her conversation skills went straight down the drain when he was around.
“No disrespect intended.” He turned to Haylee. “You, Haylee, look lovely. Glowing.”
“You’re such a liar. It’s one of your best qualities.” Haylee gave her dog a kiss, then helped her down the steps from the grooming table. “What’s up?”
Jewel shook herself and ran to Gideon, who braced his muscular legs for the onslaught. She wriggled her big body, rubbing herself against him while he stroked and patted and murmured.
Jamie watched his hands roam over the dog’s fur and her skin tingled, imagining.
“Wanted to let James know I don’t need her for the trail ride tomorrow, after all,” Gideon said. “Huck’s coming instead.”
The tingles evaporated. “Don’t call me James.”
“Daphne will be glad to hear that,” Haylee said, running a sticky roller over her pants to get rid of the dog hair. “Me too. She’ll have time to feed the steers for me then, tomorrow.”
“Gosh,” Jamie said. “Did I forget to take off my secret invisibility cloak again? I’m right here. And can’t I take an extra turn on barn-cleaning rather than feed Charley and his cohort? You know how I feel about them.”
“We all told you not to name them.” Gideon’s smile faded. He glanced at Haylee. “She’s not on the schedule, is she? For, you know.”
“Again, right here!” She waved her hand in front of Gideon. “And no. I’m exempt from the final episode on religious grounds.”
“Vegetarianism isn’t a religion.” But his smile was back.
“Buddhism is.”
“You’re not Buddhist.”
“I could be Buddhist!”
“If I could interject,” Haylee broke in, drawing Gideon’s attention. “Jamie will be working elsewhere at slaughter time. And don’t mind her. She’s pissed because I’m not handing over the reins of Companions with Purpose to her while I’m . . . busy.” She made a circular gesture toward her abdomen.
Gideon’s eyebrows moved slightly. “Huh,” he said.
“I don’t want to take over. I just want to be a trainer.” Jamie signalled for Jewel to sit, then gave her another treat. “I figured acting as Jewel’s handler for a few weeks would be a good way to start, plus helping Haylee in her time of need. Win-win. And Jewel loves me. Look how well she responds to me.”
Haylee put a hand to the small of her back and sighed. The skirmish was already lost.
“Look, I don’t have the time or energy to argue. You get plenty of time away from the kitchen with Gideon and the horses already. And yes, I appreciate what you do around the kennels immensely. You’ve got a great heart.” Haylee hesitated, and Jamie’s guard went up. “But you’re not ready for more, and I don’t have time to teach you, even if you were. Sorry, James, it’s just the way it is.”
Ouch.
Haylee motioned to her dog and the two of them walked past Gideon and Jamie, leaving them alone in the grooming room.
Jamie began cleaning up, tossing equipment into the basket, sweeping fur off the table, moving too fast in hopes of distracting herself from what felt distressingly like an onslaught of tears.
Haylee was being unreasonable. Jamie could do so much more; she knew she could. All she needed was a chance. She swallowed, and her throat made an awkward, clicking sound.
Then the warm weight of Gideon’s hand settled on her shoulder, stilling her. For a moment, she allowed it to seep into her, like seawater on sun-dried driftwood, making her feel dark and heavy and full of life.
“She knows how talented you are,” he said quietly. “The timing’s not right, that’s all.”
The comforting heat flowed over her like caramel over a ripe, red apple at the fair, taking a plain thing and making it better, sweeter, shinier. That’s how it was with Gideon. He made people feel good about themselves. He made her believe she was more than a stray, more than unclaimed baggage, more than the flotsam and jetsam tossed onto the beach after a storm.
“Try not to take it personally, kiddo.”
Kiddo.
The word hit like a rogue wave, snapping her back to reality, reminding her that no matter the hope he inspired, he still saw her as a girl who’d landed at Sanctuary Ranch with a lightweight backpack, a heavyweight past, and a big question mark for a future.
She shrugged out from beneath his hand and brushed her forearm over her eyes. “Glad you don’t need me tomorrow. I have to get out for a bit before supper. Tell Daphne I’ll be back in time for prep.” She shouldered past him through the door.
“Wait. Where’re you going?”
“Riding.” She headed for the corrals.
“Want some company?”
“No.”
He continued to follow. “James? You okay?”
She gritted her teeth. “You betcha. I’m awesome.”
She disappeared into the tack room and to her relief, he let her go.
Pigheaded persistence, she had it in spades. But her don’t-care face only lasted so long. And all the signs in the world didn’t matter if there was no way forward.
* * *
Jamie gave the bay gelding a solid nudge with her knee to move him farther up the wooded path. She had an hour before Daphne needed her for the dinner rush, and she had to get her act together.
The dense, heavy quiet of the coastal rainforest in summer was punctuated only by the rustlings and calls of the wildlife within it and the soft crush of hooves on humus. But instead of being soothing, the silence made the swirling maelstrom inside her head seem louder.
All she wanted was a chance. Haylee couldn’t keep up with her schedule, not with the baby coming. And Jamie had more than proven herself in the kennel, with dogs Haylee herself had been iffy on. Like Hannibal, for instance. If not for Jamie, he’d be dead. Instead, the massive mastiff mix had raised the social capital of a cute, nerdy paraplegic kid who now had more girlfriends than he knew what to do with.
Nash pulled on the reins, reaching for a stand of juicy-looking grass.
She yanked his head up, then instantly regretted it.
“Sorry, buddy.” She swallowed. “
It’s not you, it’s me.”
Her throat tightened. Talk about paying it forward. Or shit rolling downhill, which was more like it. Poor horse didn’t deserve her today.
Nash whuffled softly through his nose, forgiving her. She gave him his head and listened to his hoofbeats as they thumped softly, rhythmically, hypnotically on the leaf-littered trail. Slowly, the thrashing of her heart and soul subsided.
Jamie could be a great trainer, she knew it. But Haylee was as territorial as any alpha and Jamie was just the new hire who helped out wherever needed—when she wasn’t busy assisting the cook.
On a conscious level, Jamie knew she was overreacting. They were friends. Haylee valued her. The hurt was unintentional. She simply hadn’t considered the idea that Jamie might have more to contribute.
She respected Haylee. To have her look through Jamie like she wasn’t good enough or smart enough or . . . real, hurt.
But what bothered her the most was that Gideon had witnessed it. Heat twisted in her gut again as she recalled his expression. The lifted eyebrows, that surprised blink. Then the sigh, the slightly amused incredulity.
His touch, which she’d thought was so kind and understanding, had been nothing more than pity.
Of course, she knew Haylee’s rejection wasn’t personal. But it didn’t matter.
It made no difference how tough she was on the outside because, on the inside, she was still the new kid, the foster kid, forgotten yet again at school pickup.
The invisibility cloak was real.
And there was no best-before date on humiliation, it seemed.
She reached down to stroke the horse. “You’re a good boy, Nash.”
He was exactly what she needed so she focused on her breath, the moment, the solid warmth of the animal beneath her. Nash was good on trails, energetic but not flighty, compliant without being passive, and most importantly for the ranch, he was reliable with guests. One of the perks of the job was that she could ride as much as she wanted in her off time.
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