by Amelia Grey
“Why didn’t you tell me this at Valleydale? You are the impulsive one. You should have blurted it all out to me.”
She struggled to find the right words to say to make him understand her feelings at the time. “I don’t know. When I first arrived, you were so brusque I hesitated to tell you anything. And later, I didn’t want to burden you with my troubles. You were already doing so much for me by allowing me to stay in your home. I had no idea Mr. Rajaratnum would follow me to England or that he would harm anyone. He has the formula. Why would he come for me? Why would he kill anyone else?”
Morgan let go of her and said, “Sit down and tell me everything, from the beginning. And do not leave anything out.”
They sat on the settee facing each other, and Arianna quickly told him the story, starting with when her father said they would be going back to England. Morgan sat quietly and didn’t interrupt her. She finished with Beabe telling her she thought she had seen Mr. Rajaratnum a day or so ago near Mr. Warburton’s house.
“And you didn’t think your maid would know the man who killed your father?”
For the first time since he arrived, Arianna felt his tone was accusing, and that hurt. A breathless fluttering filled her chest. “I think I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t want to believe he had followed us to England. It’s not the first time she thought she saw him.”
She gazed into his anxious eyes and, all of a sudden, it hit her anew that this tragedy was her fault. She shouldered the blame because one servant was dead and another was severely wounded. That grieved her.
What have I done!
She must do something. She rose from the settee. “I’ve put your employees and mine in danger. You are at risk, too, and Mr. Warburton. I must warn Mr. Warburton, and then I’ll leave London immediately.” She spun and was going for the door, but Morgan jumped up and grabbed her arms, holding her back.
“Arianna, you aren’t going anywhere.”
“I have to,” she said, knowing she was close to losing control. “I can’t put anyone else in danger. Let me go, Morgan.” She struggled against his hold. “He’s killed twice now. I can’t let him hurt anyone else. It’s me he wants. If I leave London, he will follow me, and then you will be safe. Beabe will be safe, and Mr. Warburton will be safe to continue to search for the formula.”
“Where do you think to go?”
Her chest heaved, and her heartbeat raced. Inside she trembled. Her forearms rested tentatively on his chest. His face was so close to hers she heard his raspy breathing.
Her heart was so heavy with pain and guilt she could hardly speak, yet she continued to try to wrest herself free from his grasp. “I don’t know where I’ll go. I don’t care. I can’t let him hurt you or anyone else. Please, Morgan, let me go.”
His hands tightened on her arms, but his eyes softened, and his features relaxed. “I’m not going to let you run away.”
She couldn’t bear his sympathy.
No, not that!
She didn’t deserve it. She was unable to keep her eyes from filling with tears.
“Don’t cry, Arianna. Do not let that monster reduce you to tears. You are too strong for that.”
She bit back a sob. “No, you don’t understand. I’m not.”
He gave her a little shake. “Yes, you are. You are too strong for him. He will not make you cry, and he will not make you run. Do you hear me?”
Morgan was right. Her father deserved her tears, but his killer did not.
“I don’t know what else to do,” she said on a broken gasp and felt the first tear roll down her cheek.
He placed his warm hands on each side of her face, his thumb raking away the lone tear. He looked deeply into her eyes. “You don’t have to do anything. I’m here. Trust me, Arianna.”
She closed her eyes against his compassion. She loved him so much her body ached. “I do trust you,” she whispered earnestly. “You know I trust you.”
“Arianna.”
As if with a will of their own, her lashes lifted and she met his blue, blue gaze. She knew he was going to kiss her. She didn’t want to stop him but knew she must.
His head descended toward hers, and she twisted her face away from his. “Don’t,” she said softly. “Don’t kiss me, Morgan. I’ve told you I don’t want your kisses.”
“I don’t believe you,” he said huskily. “You said you have never lied to me. Are you lying now?”
Why must her own words come back to haunt her? Especially at a time like this when her own heart was wounded from the pain of what Mr. Rajaratnum had done to her father and Morgan’s servants.
“Yes,” she said honestly. “You know I want your kisses.”
“Yes, I do know.”
Morgan’s lips came down on hers with such hard driving passion and desperation it took her breath away. Arianna had never felt such intensity in his kisses. The depth of feeling should have frightened her, but it thrilled her, and she matched his ferocity. She shoved her hands beneath his coat, her body craving his warmth. His hands tangled in her hair. Their lips and tongues clung together. There were no words, no thoughts, just hunger, deeply rooted hunger.
With nimble fingers, Morgan quickly untied the knot in her shawl and threw it onto the settee. They fell together on top of the shawl, and Morgan rolled on top of her. With frantic movements of hands working together for a common goal, her dress was thrown up and her drawers pushed down. His trousers were unbuttoned. Their kisses were wild, fierce, and uncontrolled. The feral sounds they made were soft, whispered, but eager and passionate.
Morgan’s body bore down on hers with something thick, hard, and probing. In a single motion he thrust inside her. It was sharp, burning, and painful. Her gasp of surprise was caught by his mouth and swallowed. As the pressure built inside her, she felt full. Suddenly Morgan moaned as if something exploded inside him, and then he collapsed on top of her, shuddering and quietly gasping.
Arianna winced silently when she realized it was over almost before it began. It hadn’t lasted nearly long enough.
“Oh, damn,” Morgan whispered on an uneven breath into the warmth of her neck. “I can’t believe I did that to you. Arianna, I didn’t mean to be such a violent, greedy beast.”
She loved the feel of his weight resting on her body. Her hands moved languorously over his strong back. “What do you mean? You were not violent, nor were you a beast.”
“Do not try to assuage my shame or my guilt. I have no excuse for my clumsy haste, for taking my own pleasure and not thinking about you. I wanted you. I wanted you with such fury that I didn’t care that I was ruining you. I didn’t care that your servants might come in and catch us. I cared for nothing except possessing you.”
Arianna didn’t understand his remorse. “I am not unhappy about what happened, Morgan. How could I be? I was able to do for you what you did for me on the coast. I’ve wanted this, and for the first time you wanted me. How can that upset me?”
Morgan chuckled into her neck and then raised his head and looked deeply into her eyes. “No, not for the first time, Arianna. I have wanted you a million times since the first night I saw you. It has never been my right to take you. But tonight I felt your fear and saw your tears, and the only way I can explain it is to say I could no longer control my emotions. I never intended for this to happen, and I certainly didn’t intend for it to happen like this.”
His words pierced her heart with such sadness that all she could say was, “I know.”
There was so much uncertainty in her about where she should go from here that she suddenly wanted to weep again, but she dare not show him her weakness a second time. She swallowed hard, closed her eyes, and summoned an inner strength.
When she lifted her lashes, she pushed at Morgan’s chest. “We shouldn’t be doing this, not now, not knowing what happened to—”
“Shh.” He silenced her by placing a finger tenderly upon her lips. “Listen to me. Nothing can be done for the man who is dead except for me t
o take care of his family, and I will. I have already dispatched a doctor from here in London to go to Post. The man is already on his way. All that can be done for him will be done. There’s nothing more I can do right now for him. I have already talked to a man on Bow Street, and by now, there should be runners arriving to guard your house and to make sure no one gets in here. What I can do now is right the wrong I did to you.”
She was puzzled by his words. “What wrong?”
He touched her cheek with his fingertips and smiled. “I’m going to show you how a man makes love to a woman, starting right now. Where are your servants?”
Suddenly Arianna felt as if a million butterflies were fighting to get out of her stomach. “All retired but Mrs. Hartford, who is in the music room playing the pianoforte.”
He smiled. “So that is real music I hear?”
“I asked Mrs. Hartford to play the pianoforte while she waits to show you out.”
He chuckled low in his throat before saying, “I always hear music when I’m with you, so I had no idea there was someone actually playing this time.”
His words thrilled her. Arianna felt as if her heart opened up and was filled with Morgan.
“Is there any chance she’ll bother us?” Morgan asked.
“I don’t think she will come until I call her.”
Her lips parted for a final, feeble protest, but all they found was the warmth of Morgan’s mouth covering hers, softly, sweetly, briefly. He cupped her waist with one hand and with the other gently massaged her breast. He rocked his lower body against hers, and Arianna felt him filling her again. All the pent-up tension left her body, and she melted beneath his gentle touch.
“All right, you had your turn, I’ve had mine, and now it’s time for our turn. You and me together this time.”
Arianna smiled. “I would like that.”
As he kissed her lips, her cheeks, and her eyes, his movements were confident, commanding. His mouth and tongue ravaged hers in a hungry kiss, and his body leaned heavily, deeply into hers, pressing his hardness into her softness. She met his ardor with a surprising fervency of her own.
He propped himself above her with one hand, and with the other, he grabbed hold of the neckline of her dress and pushed it off her shoulder and down her arm. With little work, he freed her breast and cupped it before closing his mouth over her nipple.
Arianna gasped with pleasure that was too wonderful to put into words. Her nipple stiffened beneath his gentle touch. Waves of pleasure radiated through her. He bent his head and closed his mouth over the rosy tip of her breast and suckled. Arianna moaned with exquisite delight. She slid her hands up to let her fingers tangle in his thick, luxurious hair. Her hand traced the line of his shoulder and down his muscled arm. His hand molded over the fullness of her breast, and he gently sucked, giving her immense pleasure and satisfaction.
Pulling his neckcloth and collar down with her teeth, she nuzzled the warmth of his neck with her nose and lips, letting her tongue explore his scratchy skin, tasting him. Her hands combed over the solid wall of back, hips, and buttocks.
“Lift your hips and move with me, Arianna.”
And she did, matching his rhythm as he pressed against her. He kissed her lips, her eyes, the tip of her nose, and down to her breast again.
“I have dreamed of this, Arianna, so many times.”
Suddenly, when that sensation she couldn’t explain, couldn’t control, settled in her womanly core, her heart beat so loudly in her ears it was frightening, exhilarating.
His lips left her breast and brushed up her chest and across her shoulder. He buried his nose in the crook of her neck. Arianna rose up to cup his body to her, and an explosion of sensation spiraled through her that was so heavenly she thought she might lose her breath and faint. She wanted to cry out that she loved him with all her heart, but she swallowed the words and kept them hidden in her heart, and the sensation slowly ebbed.
Moments later, Morgan’s body jerked, his rough breathing slowed, and he settled himself deep within her. He moaned softly, breathlessly, and kissed that soft area between her neck and shoulders.
Morgan slipped his arms beneath her back and hugged her tightly to his chest before raising his head and looking down into her eyes. “I didn’t want this to happen between us like this, Arianna, but now that it has, I can’t say I’m sorry it did.”
She smiled. “I’m not sorry either. I’ve wanted this for a long time.”
He nodded. “Forgive me for being in a hurry. I will make it up to you.”
To Arianna there was nothing to forgive, but if he thought there was, she wanted him at peace. “You’re forgiven,” she whispered.
He kissed her so tenderly Arianna wanted the kiss to last forever, but she knew that couldn’t be. They lay that way only for a few moments before Morgan rose, turned his back, and quietly started adjusting his clothing. Arianna rose and quickly did the same to her clothing and hair.
When he turned to face her, he said, “I have many things to do, Arianna. You’ll be safe here. I don’t want you leaving this house until I get back to talk to you.”
He reached down and picked up the shawl that was spotted with the evidence of her virginity and handed it to her. “You don’t want your maid to see this. Now go call Mrs. Hartford and tell her I’m ready to leave.”
Twenty
My Dearest Grandson Lucas,
I’m sure Lord Chesterfield had a particular person in mind when he wrote this, but he never made mention of the name. “A strange concurrence of circumstances has sometimes raised very bad men to high stations, but they have been raised like criminals to a pillory, where their persons and their crimes, by being more conspicuous, are only more known, the more detested, and the more pelted and insulted.”
Your loving Grandmother,
Lady Elder
Arianna loved Morgan with all her heart, but she simply couldn’t obey his every command. She had to warn Mr. Warburton about Mr. Rajaratnum. She would have loved to have gone straight to bed and dreamed about every touch, every taste, and every whisper from her time with Morgan, but that would have to wait until sometime in the future. Right now, duty demanded that she think about her wants later. The first thing she had to do was go to see Mr. Warburton.
Morgan thought Mr. Warburton could take care of himself, but she wasn’t so sure of that. He was a man her father’s age, and her father certainly hadn’t been a match for Mr. Rajaratnum’s youth and strength. The old man needed to be warned. Arianna was sure of it. And just a note via a footman might not convince Mr. Warburton that he was in danger.
It was bad enough that she had the death of Morgan’s groom, Jessup, on her head, and possibly Post’s, too. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself if any harm came to Mr. Warburton and she hadn’t alerted him. Morgan said he had someone watching her house so that Mr. Rajaratnum couldn’t get in, so she felt comfortable that her servants should be safe.
As soon as Mrs. Hartford showed Morgan out of the house, Arianna dismissed her for the evening. But instead of going straight to bed, Arianna went to her room and found a black, hooded cloak and her reticule. She opened her jewelry chest, took some coins from the bottom of it, and dropped them into the drawstring purse. She had a moment’s hesitation, thinking maybe she was once again being too impulsive. What would she do if it was too late in the evening to find a coach to hire? Arianna pushed those thoughts away as just being jittery. What little she’d seen of London’s streets the evening she went to the ball with Constance, they were very busy with traffic. She would be fine. And just in case she had to wait for Mr. Warburton, as she had the first time she visited him, she picked up her copy of Lord Chesterfield’s letters from her night stand and stuffed the small book into her reticule with the coins. She picked up her cape and turned to leave. Beabe was standing in the doorway.
“I thought you were already in bed,” Arianna said.
“Not yet. I was doing some mending, getting ready for my journey
next week. Right now, I’m thinking it looks like it was a good thing I was busy. What are you doing with your cloak and reticule in your hands at this time of night?”
Arianna took in a deep breath. “It’s not that late, yet. I must go out, Beabe, but I don’t want the rest of the staff to know, so I would appreciate it if you would speak quietly.”
“If you are going out, Miss Ari, I’m going with you.”
“I must do this alone.”
“No, Miss Ari, I can’t let you do that. I told your father I’d take care of you, and I will. I don’t know where you are going, but you are not going without me.”
Beabe was so fearful of Mr. Rajaratnum, Arianna didn’t want Beabe to know that she had been right and the man was in London. “All right, just to keep you quiet, you can ride in the coach with me, but I must go into Mr. Warburton’s house by myself. Now get your cape and meet me at the front door.”
When Beabe came down with her cloak, she also had Benson with her. She had taken it upon herself to wake the driver to take them to Mr. Warburton’s rather than risk the chance of not finding a coach to hire. Arianna easily agreed, seeing the logic and safety in having her own driver.
It took longer for Benson to go to the mews and ready the carriage than it did to drive to Mr. Warburton’s house. But finally, Arianna was standing on the man’s front steps, waiting for someone to answer the door. A steady rain fell, and there was a chill to the foggy air, but somehow she knew she was doing the right thing in coming to see the man.
At last, an older woman opened the door just enough to peek around it and asked, “Who is it?”
“Miss Arianna Sweet. I met you about a week ago when I brought some papers to Mr. Warburton. I realize it’s late, but it’s important that I speak to him.”
“Hold on, I’ll see if he’s available,” the woman said and shut the door again.
Arianna looked back to the coach and waved to Benson to let him know all was fine. A couple of minutes later the door jerked open and Mr. Warburton stood in front of her.