by Nancy Thayer
“So cancel the wedding. Or postpone it.”
“No, Poppy. That’s not going to happen.” Alison was angry now, working hard to remain cordial. She presented her offering. “Well, the wedding is going to happen, but David and I could postpone our honeymoon. That way he could be here while you have your baby, and he could hand over the control to you more gradually.”
Poppy stared. “You would do that? You would postpone your honeymoon cruise?”
“Of course I would, Poppy. If that’s what David wants, of course. It does seem like a good idea, doesn’t it?”
Poppy bit her lip. She stared at the floor. In that moment, Alison saw the young woman in Poppy, the daughter of a mother who had died four years ago and was not there to share this new pregnancy with Poppy, to counsel Poppy, to intercede in all matters with Poppy’s father on Poppy’s behalf. Poppy was a woman alone, surrounded by males, her father, her brother, her husband. It really was too bad that Ethan refused to take any part in the management of the company. He could share the burden with Poppy; he could lighten her load. Poppy was brilliant and assertive and capable, but she was also a mother and a pregnant woman and a wife and a daughter. And now she was about to see her beloved father joined to another woman, the archetypal wicked stepmother.
Alison wanted very much for Poppy to consider her a friend, not an enemy. And at this moment, she experienced an unexpected surge of love and sympathy for the young woman who had so much on her hands—and in her body. Yet she was certain that if she attempted to make a conciliatory move—to embrace her, make a joke—if she tried to do that, Poppy would snap like a trap and take off Alison’s hand.
So she waited quietly.
At last Poppy spoke. “That might work. I’ll think about it.”
“And, Poppy, one more thing.”
Poppy squinted suspiciously. “What?”
“I’d love to have your advice about the wedding present I want to give David. You’re the only one I can ask, really, because I need it to be kept a secret, something my daughters find impossible to do. Plus, you know your father best of all of us.” She was flat-out flattering Poppy, and the younger woman seemed receptive.
“I can keep a secret,” Poppy said. “Ethan, not so much.”
“That’s what I thought. So. I’ve spent time walking around town. I’ve noticed that many houses have quarterboards, like those on ships, with clever names, like PLEASANT DREAMS on Pleasant Street or LOVE OF FAIR on Fair Street. This house doesn’t have a quarterboard, so I thought I’d have one made to give to David as a wedding gift.”
“Hm. What would it say?” Poppy still looked suspicious.
“I was thinking GLAD TO BE HERE. Because your father’s last name is Gladstone. And we’re all glad to be here, right?”
“That’s kind of corny.”
Alison bit her tongue. “Too corny? What do you think of the idea in general?”
“I like the idea, but…”
“Okay, well, what about this one? GLAD TIDINGS. Because the house faces the ocean and the tides—”
“I get it. Yes, that’s kind of clever. I like that one.”
“All right then! I’ll get right on it! Glad to have your input!”
“Don’t tell Heather,” Poppy said. “She’d be sure to tell Dad.”
“Okay, good idea. I won’t tell anyone else. It will be our secret.”
Poppy almost smiled before she left the room. Fine, Alison thought, now Poppy believed she was making the decisions not only about the company and about her father’s honeymoon plans but also about Alison’s wedding present to David. So she and Poppy weren’t friends yet, but they were collaborators in a major secret. That was a good start.
Jane flew in later that afternoon and made her way to the house in a rental car. Ethan arrived in the early evening. David spent a great deal of time with his grandchildren, and Alison saw how that made Poppy ease into a happy state that Alison hadn’t seen her in before. Everyone was in a good mood, so for a day or two, Alison relaxed.
seventeen
Ingrid lived in a house, a real house, not a rented apartment like many of the young people who worked for Green Food. It was large, airy, and uncluttered, a house that could have been photographed for a magazine, everything crisp and dove gray and cream, open plan, the living room segueing easily into the dining room and kitchen. Glass doors slid open to the patio and swimming pool.
It was nicer than the house Noah and Felicity owned. As Felicity sat on a lawn chair, smearing sunblock on her children and putting water wings on Luke, she listened to the talk around her as other employees came out to the pool. “Wow,” they said, or “Awesome,” but no one asked how it was that Ingrid had such a house. So they must all know, and Noah must know, and there was another important matter that Noah shared with Ingrid but not with Felicity.
The other wives and significant others and female employees all wore bathing suits, mostly bikinis that showed off their already tanned bodies. When did they have time to tan? Felicity wore a bathing suit, too, and it was also a bikini, but she was self-conscious about the weight she carried on her hips and her sagging-from-nursing breasts. The worst thing was that there were no other children at the party. No other mothers. Not even one. Felicity knew she was not the oldest person there, but she wasn’t young and carefree and cool and hip, or whatever they called themselves these days. She didn’t even know what they called themselves, which made her feel at least another decade older. But when Alice took Luke’s hand and tenderly helped him down the steps into the water, Felicity forgot about everything and sat smiling, lost in the beauty of her children.
A woman swept up. “Hello again! Remember me? I’m Cynthia Levine, we met at the Christmas party. I’ll sit here, okay? We’ll be the old married section.”
Felicity smiled as Cynthia, bravely displaying dimpled thighs and a bulging belly in her black one piece, joined her.
“Your children are darling. I hope this little guy is as cute as yours.” Cynthia settled herself on a lounger, setting a beach bag spilling over with towels, crackers, water, sunblock, and a chiffon cover-up next to her.
“You’re pregnant! Congratulations!” Felicity’s pleasure was real. At last, another mother on the Green Food wives’ team.
“Yes, and I love it. I never have to hold my stomach in. And the Horny Bachelors have stopped flirting with me. They avoid me like the plague.”
“The Horny Bachelors?”
“Don’t tell me they haven’t hit on you. They’re young and obsessed with work and awkward in social situations and desperate to get laid without consequences. They especially like married women. See the guy with the man bun? And the guy with the tattoo? And the guy in the Hawaiian shirt?”
“Those guys have hit on you? Why don’t they hit on the women on the staff?”
“Okay, well, first, there aren’t enough women to go around, and second, the women want a relationship, the scariest word in the Green Food guy world.”
“Well, I’m insulted,” Felicity joked. “No guy’s even talked to me and I’m married.”
“You have children, another scary thing. Plus, you’re married to the Big Guy and no one wants to get on his bad side.”
“I wish someone would hit on her,” Felicity whispered, nodding her head toward Ingrid, who was deep in conversation with Noah. “Actually, I wish someone would just hit her.” Immediately, she said, “Oh, I don’t mean that. I’m just jealous of the time she gets to spend with Noah. And how close they are because of work.”
Cynthia gave Felicity a long look. “So you don’t know?”
A frozen shiver of fear slid through Felicity’s heart. “Know what?”
“Well, honey…I think your husband and Ingrid are close outside work. Okay, maybe not technically outside the building, but—”
Felicity clasped Cynthia’s ar
m. “Cynthia. What are you saying?”
Cynthia patted Felicity’s hand gently. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have told you like this, here at a party, but we never see each other any other time so—”
“Is Noah sleeping with Ingrid?”
“I wouldn’t say sleeping, exactly.”
“Oh, for heaven’s sake, I’m going to explode if you don’t just say it!”
“Well, you have to understand, I wasn’t there, Terry, my husband, told me, and he got it secondhand. Topaz, the redheaded girl over there? She went to the supply closet for some more toner, and it was locked, but she wriggled the handle and the door opened and Ingrid and Noah were in there all over each other. Kissing. And Noah had pulled Ingrid’s skirt up and had his hands on her bum. So that’s not actually having sex and it’s certainly not sleeping—I’ve never understood why we use that term, sleeping, it’s not exactly descriptive of what is actually happening.”
Felicity couldn’t breathe. Sounds around her dimmed, and her sight went wonky. She pressed her hands against her stomach and bent forward.
“Felicity? Are you okay? Oh, damn, I’m sorry I told you.”
“I’m okay. Just shocked. Give me a minute.” Felicity breathed through her nose. She stared at her feet for a few long moments. Sitting erect again, she asked, “Is Topaz a reliable source?” Immediately she burst out laughing, rather hysterically. “Listen to me, I sound like a journalist.”
“Felicity, I’m so sorry. And they were only making out. And yes, Topaz is a truthful person. She’s nice. She’s kind of odd, all about computer stuff, but she wouldn’t make this up. And my husband, well, he’s a straight arrow, drives me crazy sometimes, and he didn’t snicker about what Topaz said. In fact, he was, well, uncomfortable about it. He wondered how this would affect the company.”
“The company,” Felicity snorted. “I’m beginning to hate the company.”
“Mommy! Look!” Alice was waving to her from the pool. She was walking backward in the shallow end, towing Luke with her hands.
“Oh, good girl, Alice!” Felicity called. “Lukey, are you learning to swim?”
“I’m a tanker, Mommy. Alice is a tugboat!”
“Awesome!” Felicity yelled. Looking at Cynthia, she said, “I need to go play with my children. You’ll find, once you have your little one, that you become an ace at being schizophrenic. I’d like to stab Noah and Ingrid or at least throw rocks at them, but instead I’m going to be happy mommy.”
“Is it okay that I told you?” Cynthia asked.
“Yes. It was exactly the right thing to do.” She rose and walked down the steps into the pool. “Oooh,” she said to her children, who came swimming to her as if they’d been born with fins. “It’s cold.”
“Do what I do, Mommy,” Alice advised. “Just get wet all the way to your shoulders. Get it over with in one big shock.”
“Excellent idea, Alice,” Felicity said. She slipped beneath the water, swam down to touch the bottom, and came up dripping wet.
“Are you okay, Mommy?” Alice asked.
“Absolutely,” Felicity responded and dove down again to tickle her son’s foot.
* * *
—
Her children were sleeping. Alice had been so tired she’d closed her eyes and drifted off at once, but Luke was overexcited by the day of swimming and had trouble relaxing. Felicity sat on the side of his bed and lightly ran her fingers over his back, singing lullabies very softly. She was in no hurry to leave her children’s room. Because when she did, she had to confront Noah.
Finally, Luke slept, lying on his belly, face turned to the side, long lashes brushing his sunburned cheeks. Such innocence, Felicity thought, with a pang in her heart. This child adored his father. Luke was only five years old. How confusing it would be if his father left this home to live with another woman. Felicity felt as if her heart was being ripped open.
She rose from the bed, pulling the monster truck sheet up over his shoulders. She left the room and walked into the bathroom, where she locked the door and stood staring at her face in the mirror. She had showered with the children, and her hair was still damp, but the same rosy glow that brightened her son’s cheeks brightened hers. She wore a light cotton caftan she’d got at a thrift shop. She seldom wore it because it fell to her ankles and tripped her going up the stairs. But tonight she wanted the extra material coverage, as if she was going into battle.
And she was going into battle.
Noah was in the kitchen, standing at the sink, drinking down a glass of ice water.
“I think I’m dehydrated,” he said, facing the window.
“Noah. We need to talk. Now. Please.” Felicity put her hands on the back of a kitchen chair for support.
Her husband gave her a weary glance. “Babe, it’ll have to wait until tomorrow. I’m beat. All that sun—”
“I know about you and Ingrid. Cynthia Levine told me what Topaz saw.”
Noah’s mouth twitched in an oddly childish guilty smile. “And what did Topaz see?”
“She saw you with Ingrid. Kissing Ingrid, and—” Felicity gagged. She put her hand over her mouth.
“For Christ’s sake!” Noah swore. “You have no idea how my company works, do you?”
“Maybe not. Would you sit down and talk to me about it?”
Angrily, Noah yanked out a chair and sat. He still had not met Felicity’s eyes.
Felicity waited.
“Look.” Noah sighed, running his hands through his hair. “I really don’t need this right now. I’ve got a company to run and a product to test and an ad plan to create.”
“And I’ve got a family to protect,” Felicity replied.
“Your family. That’s all you care about.”
“That’s not true, Noah. I do everything I can to take care of you. I cook you healthy meals and keep your clothes clean and ironed. The children adore you. If I spend more time with the children than with you, it’s because you’re never here. I would spend more time with you if you were ever here.”
“That’s because I’m working my ass off! Day and night! These are the crucial days and weeks and hours, Felicity, I’ve told you again and again!”
“And making out with Ingrid in the storage closet is crucial to your work?”
“Come on, Felicity, let’s not get into this now.”
Her heart froze. “What is this?”
Noah crossed his arms over his chest and clenched his teeth.
“Are you having sex with her?”
Noah raised his eyes to the ceiling, exasperated.
Felicity’s voice was quiet, steady, although her hands, clasped on her lap, were trembling. “Please, Noah. I deserve to know.”
Grumpily, like a cornered child, Noah said, “No, I’m not having sex with her.”
“But you want to.”
“It’s complicated.”
“Tell me how.”
Noah let out a sigh. “I can’t expect you to understand. It’s like doctors and nurses, Felicity. They’re under so much constant pressure, they have sex whenever and wherever they can to release the pressure, to stop thinking for a moment.”
“So…” Felicity took a moment to gather her thoughts. “So you could have sex with any of your female employees? Have you been in the supply closet with other women?”
“For God’s sake, Felicity. You’re getting irrational.”
“So, it’s only Ingrid you’ve been with. Do you love her?”
Noah dropped his head. Muttered something.
“I didn’t hear you, Noah.”
He lifted his head and looked Felicity right in the eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t think so. But I know she loves me more than you do.”
Stung, Felicity almost cried: Oh, don’t be such a baby, Noah! But she held her tongue. “Oh,” s
he said. “Wow. What a terribly sad thing to think, Noah. It’s not true, you know, I love you more than the world. But romance often gets lost in marriage.”
“That’s for sure.”
Felicity spoke slowly, finding her way, watching Noah’s reactions. “I know you’re tired and terribly stressed. I do know that. I know you’re working toward something enormous and world-changing. I know you can’t find time for a vacation, but really, I think it would help your work if you took just a weekend off. A weekend to come to the island with me and the kids. Alison would spoil you with wonderful food, and you could swim in the ocean—and you know, Noah, the ocean is magical. I mean, scientifically magical. I’ve read articles about this. Being near the ocean, looking out at the ocean, that soothes your thoughts. And you could lie on the beach with the sun on your back and not think of anything at all. And that’s good for your brain, too, I’ve read about that.”
She watched carefully. Noah’s shoulders dropped, the muscles in his neck and jaw relaxed, his breathing deepened.
“So the ocean will give you new energy. And I can take you behind a sand dune and remind you of some of the things we did when we were first married.”
“I’ve got so much to do, Felicity.”
“You can leave it for two days.”
“I don’t know, Felicity.”
“Let’s find out.”
* * *
—
Monday night the Nantucket fireworks were magical, a true extravaganza, made even more exciting by the boats in the harbor that blew their horns whenever an especially fabulous pinwheel dazzled through the air. By the time the grand finale had finished, the children were hoarse from yelling and Alison’s hands stung from applauding. Because of the crowd, the family had to park their cars blocks away. As the Gladstones and Jane hiked back among the throng of other people, everyone, even the children, was too tired to talk. Once they arrived back at the house, Daphne and Hunter went to bed without begging to stay up later.