as Sparrowhawk sailed on, completely unhurt. ‘Your
pathetic raft is so small we didn’t see you!’
‘Har har har,’ guffawed Dogsbreath the
Duhbrain.
The ramming sent The Hopeful
Puffin into one of her spins.
For a long time she spun round in
wobbly circles, like a confused
28
sea-urchin.
Eventually, Hiccup
regained control of the
rudder and Fishlegs picked
himself up from the bottom of the boat,
moaning slightly.
The Hopeful Puffin completed her final spin
and began moving swiftly forwards.
But the fog had come down again, if anything
even thicker than before. After all that spinning,
29
Hiccup had absolutely no idea which direction they
were facing. And when the last faint echoes of
Snotlout and Dogsbreath’s jeering had faded away,
they sailed on in spooky silence.
‘Where is everybody?’ asked Fishlegs.
‘Ssssh,’ scolded Hiccup. ‘I’m trying to listen.’
The boys were quiet for ten long minutes.
The only sound to be heard was the lapping of
water against the sides of the boat and a brisk wind
filling out the sail. They were gliding along at quite a
rate now, but where were they going? Hiccup and
Fishlegs strained their eyes into the fog and their ears
into the silence, desperate to see or hear something,
anything at all.
But there was nothing.
It might have been Hiccup’s imagination playing
tricks on him, but it seemed to him as if the air
suddenly felt just a tiny bit warmer, and when he trailed
a finger briefly into the water it felt just a tiny bit less icy
than it should have done. And then he got to thinking
about the Summer Current and Sharkworms and a
prickle of fear ran all down his back, and everywhere
about him the drifting, ghostly fog seemed to be taking
the shape of Sharkworm fins…
30
‘Just out of interest,’ asked Fishlegs casually,
‘how does a Sharkworm attack you, exactly?’
‘Well,’ replied Hiccup, changing direction yet
again in the hope of getting back to the safety of the bay,
‘Sharkworms should only attack if you are wounded.
Even if you’re not in the water they can smell the blood
and that drives them crazy. And then, because they have
legs as well as a fishy tail, they can actually CLIMB
ABOARD a ship to get you. That’s where they got their
nickname of “Pirate Dragons”, because, although they
can survive at least ten minutes in the air, they generally
drag you back into the water to kill you.’
‘Oh, brilliant,’ said Fishlegs, frantically
checking himself all over to see if he had any grazes.
‘Do you think eczema counts or does it have to be an
actual cut?’
‘I’m not sure,’ said Hiccup. ‘I’ve never actually
met a Sharkworm.’
‘Better and better,’ said Fishlegs. ‘It’s at times
like this that I am so glad that I was born a Viking and
not a Roman.’ (The Romans were the Vikings’ deadly
enemies – a very bossy lot who wanted to take over
the world and had jolly nearly got there.) ‘Think how
BORING it would be to be a Roman. All those warm
31
baths and lounging around in togas when you could be
out here enjoying the fresh air and the multi-fanged
blood-crazy carnivores…’
‘Ssssh,’ said Hiccup, changing direction for the
ninth time. ‘Let’s just see whether we can hear
anything this time…’
But again there was silence, and the splash of
seawater coming over the side on to Hiccup’s ankle
felt definitely warm.
‘I’m h-h-hungry,’ said a deep little voice from
Hiccup’s chest and both boys jumped at the sudden
sound.
The nose of Toothless, Hiccup’s disobedient
little dragon, poked out of the top of Hiccup’s shirt,
closely followed by the rest of him. He crawled
sleepily up Hiccup’s neck to his familiar perch on the
top of Hiccup’s helmet, where he shook out his wings,
had a quick rummage for dragonfleas, and gave an
enormous yawn, revealing a very pink forked tongue
and the fang-free gums that gave him his name.
Even though he was only a Common-or-
Garden dragon, the most ordinary of the dragon
species, Toothless was a beautiful little creature. He
was a deep emerald green in colour, fading to
32
shimmering pearl on his tummy like a mackerel,
lightly sprinkled with pale brown freckles.
Enormous, innocent, grass-green eyes peered
out from between absurdly long eyelashes.
Appearances, of course, were
deceptive, for dragons are among the
most selfish animals on the planet,
and Toothless was, in fact, a shark in
a baby seal’s clothing.
‘You can help us, actually,
Toothless,’ said Hiccup. ‘This is
IMPORTANT. We need to find
ourselves back to the bay. We’re a bit
worried that we might have
accidentally got ourselves into the
Summer Current and we don’t want to bump into any
SHARKWORMS, now, do we?’ Hiccup laughed
nervously. ‘So what YOU could do is flap around and
look for boats so we can get back on the right course.’
‘Ask Horrorcow. Toothless h-h-hungry,’ said
Toothless grumpily. He had woken up in a bad mood.
Hiccup raised his eyes to the heavens before
explaining patiently that Horrowcow was asleep and
there was no way she was going to wake up.
33
Horrorcow was Fishlegs’s dragon – a nice
enough beast, but she spent most of her time asleep.
She was lying, sprawled full length, underneath one of
the rowing benches. Fishlegs had put a coat under her
head to lift it clear of the water so she didn’t drown.
‘T-t-toothless not m-m-moving.’ Toothless was in
a big sulk now. ‘N-n-no food – no moving. Toothless on
strike. Hiccup BOSSY BOSSY BOSSY. D-d-d-do this.
Do that. Toothless a d-d-dragon, not a slave. Work,
work, work, that’s all you make poor Toothless do.’
‘Toothless, you’ve been asleep since breakfast!’
protested Hiccup. ‘And that’s the most unfair thing
I’ve ever heard. I wait on you hand and foot, you know
I do. I feed you constantly, I tell you jokes, I carry you
everywhere…’
‘Toothless h-h-has w-w-weak wings,’ said
Toothless pathetically.
‘You woke me up FOUR TIMES last night…’
‘Toothless had a n-n-nightmare.’ Toothless
opened his big green eyes even wider. ‘Great big fat
horrible h-h-humans with BIG TEETH chasing poor
Toothless all through his b-b-bed, want to get Toothless
because Toothless is so s-s-special…’
‘You wanted OYSTERS!’ howled Hiccup.
/>
34
‘Oysters at three o’clock in the morning!’
‘Oysters g-g-good for nightmares,’ protested
Toothless.
Hiccup ran out of patience.
‘You wouldn’t shut up! You perched on my
father’s bed and said you’d screech in his ear if I
didn’t get them! I had to get up, get dressed, go down
to the Oyster Hoard in Hooligan Harbour and then
when I got back again you wouldn’t even EAT them
because you said they were the wrong colour or
something!’
‘They had b-b-black bits on them,’ whined
35
Toothless. ‘Toothless h-h-hates black bits, they’re
YUCKY…’
‘Oh, don’t be such a BIG BABY, Toothless,’
snapped Hiccup. ‘It was only bits of seaweed and even
when I picked them all off you STILL wouldn’t eat
them!’
‘I hate to interrupt,’ said Fishlegs nervously,
‘but I’m pretty certain I saw the fin of a Sharkworm
over there…’
But Toothless and Hiccup were so cross they
didn’t even hear. They were nose to nose, eyeballing
each other. Toothless had puffed up to nearly twice his
normal size and had turned an unpleasant mustardy-
red colour. Hiccup had forgotten you shouldn’t really
look a dragon in the eye for too long because their
gaze is hypnotic, and he was starting to feel dizzy. But
he was so angry he didn’t care.
This dragon had gone too far this time.
Hiccup had HAD ENOUGH.
He was going to put his foot down.
‘I do ALL these things for YOU,’ continued
Hiccup, ‘and EVERY now and then I ask you to do a
few SIMPLE things for ME, like catch some
mackerel in a Dragontraining Lesson, or look out for
36
Sharkworms so we don’t all get dragged off and torn to
pieces, and what do you do? You go ON STRIKE. Well
you’ve gone too far this time. I’ve HAD ENOUGH.
I’m putting my foot down. You can just GO on strike
then and see if I care.’
‘OK then,’ hissed Toothless. ‘T-T-Toothless
really WILL go on strike.’
With great dignity Toothless flapped off
Hiccup’s shoulder and up to the top of the mast
where he perched, muttering to himself in a furious
undertone, ‘T-T-Toothless a BIG BABY, is he? HA!
We’ll SEE about that, M-M-Mister Smartypants
Hiccup. L-l-let’s just find out how l-l-long you last
37
without the help of the BIG BABY…’
‘What’s he doing?’ asked Fishlegs.
Fishlegs didn’t speak Dragonese, so he wasn’t
sure what was going on. ‘Is he listening out for boats
so we can get back to the bay?’
‘Er, no…’ admitted Hiccup, whose head was
still spinning after the staring contest with Toothless.
‘We had a bit of a row and he’s gone on strike. But I’ve
had it up to here with that dragon. He’s pushed me too
far too often… I’m drawing a line in the mud…’
‘Oh, for Thor’s sake!’ Fishlegs exploded. ‘We
haven’t got time for that now… LOOK!’
Hiccup’s eyes finally swam back into focus.
He looked.
The fog had shifted around, making it difficult
to see, but for a moment Hiccup thought he might
have glimpsed a black fin, with the jagged edge that
made it clear that this was the fin of a Sharkworm,
rather than that of its less dangerous relative, the
ordinary shark…
‘I don’t think that was a Sharkworm, you know,
Fishlegs,’ said Hiccup uncertainly. ‘I think it’s just the
fog playing tricks on our eyes…’
But Fishlegs wasn’t taking any chances. He
38
tried to shake Horrorcow awake but the little reptile
only snored all the harder.
‘We need Toothless!’ panicked Fishlegs. ‘For
Thor’s sake do something! Apologise! Promise him
something large that he can EAT!’
‘You could be right,’ admitted Hiccup. ‘OK,
Toothless,’ he called up. Through the fog he could just
see the dragon-on-strike perched on top of the
swaying mast. ‘I apologise. We need you. If you fly
down and help I’ll give you all my supper for the next
three weeks!’
‘S-s-sixty seconds,’ said Toothless to himself
with satisfaction. ‘Sixty seconds and they n-n-need
Toothless again.’
‘N-n-not listening!’ he sang down, examining
his talons. ‘H-H-Hiccup not need the help of a BIG
BABY…’
‘Honestly, I think we’re sort of OK,’ said
Hiccup, squinting at the seas around them. ‘I can’t see
anything now and Sharkworms really are only
supposed to attack if somebody has an open wound…’
Fishlegs was too panicked to hear what Hiccup
was saying. He started yelling up the mast.
‘Toooooothlessssss!’
39
‘Not listening! Not l-l-listening!’ Toothless
called back with his wings over his ears.
Fishlegs shut his eyes in the hope that this wasn’t
really happening… and then he opened them again.
‘Listen!’ he hissed with frantic relief. ‘Can you
hear what I hear? Sea-dragons!’
Hiccup sat very still.
And there it was, a very faint noise of dragons
shrieking.
‘A Peaceable fishing boat!’ said Fishlegs joyfully.
‘Just in time, too! This is our lucky day!’ He grabbed
the rudder off Hiccup and swung it hard around to
face in the direction of the noise.
‘Come on, come ON,’ Fishlegs urged The
Hopeful Puffin as the wind caught her sails and took
her swiftly forwards, ‘and please don’t start turning
round in circles.’
To Fishlegs’s relief the noise of screaming
dragons grew louder and louder and the grey shadowy
shape of an enormous boat loomed at them out of the
fog.
It was a far, far larger boat than Hiccup was
expecting. Surely Peaceable fishing boats didn’t
normally have three layers of oars? And the sound the
41
dragons were making was also unusual.
‘Those dragons aren’t hungry, they’re angry,’
said Hiccup slowly.
‘Who cares?’ shrieked Fishlegs, grabbing a
grappling hook that was on a rope attached to the prow
of The Hopeful Puffin. He threw it so that it caught
perfectly over the rim of the larger boat and held.
Fishlegs was not a great athlete. He had tried
this countless times in Boarding-an-Enemy-Ship
Lessons and had never managed to throw it
successfully before.
In fact, several times he had nearly knocked
himself out in the process. Which just goes to show,
it’s amazing what a person can do when he feels he is
in deadly mortal danger.
‘Hang on a second, Fishlegs!’ warned Hiccup.
‘We have to keep our heads here! We haven’t
definitely seen a Sharkworm yet, have w
e? And those
dragons are screaming the most awful things in
Dragonese…’
But Fishlegs was in too much of a twitter of
terror to listen to Hiccup.
‘Have you forgotten? We’re supposed to be
boarding a Peaceable fishing boat right now!’ he
42
The SHARKWORM
One of the scariest predators in the ocean.
You are not safe either in the water or out,
for the Sharkworm has thick muscly alligator
legs that allow it to climb on board ship
to kill.
~STATISTICS~
COLOURS: Black, green, grey.
ARMED WITH: Serrated Fangs, claws etc.
FEAR FACTOR:......9
ATTACK: ......9
SPEED: ............9
SIZE: .........8
DISOBEDIENCE: ..........9
Wings fold into body
cavity when swimming
scolded. ‘Remember Boarding-an-Enemy-Ship
lessons? Remember Gobber? Big chap, bad breath,
muscles like Bashyballs? He’s going to KILL us if we
don’t come back with a Peaceable helmet, right?
Although, of course, it’s a fascinating question
whether or not that was a deadly man-eating
Sharkworm or just a trick of the eyes, I really don’t
feel like staying here and discussing it somehow…’
Fishlegs started climbing the rope.
Again, Fishlegs was normally hopeless at rope–
climbing But this time he was up that rope as quick
as a Shortwing Squirrelserpent scrambling up a tree.
Hiccup hopped nervously from one foot to
another, listening to the furiously angry dragons
shrieking from the enormous ship towering above him.
He couldn’t let Fishlegs board the ship alone.
Hiccup said a quick prayer to Woden, put his
hands upon the rope, and began to squirm up after his
friend.
‘Here goes…’ muttered Fishlegs, as he reached
the top of the rope and prepared to climb over the
edge and into the boat. He pulled out his sword with
one trembling hand. ‘Remember, they’re only
fishermen, they’re scared silly by Hooligans,’ he
44
reminded himself. ‘What was it Gobber said to say
when we went over the top? Oh I know, that stupid
How to Train Your Dragon: How to Speak Dragonese Page 2