“What?” he said innocently. “I can’t request a meal with my two best friends? There are a few things I want to do, only I’m obviously in no condition to do much, so you two are going to do them for me.”
“What?” Andy had a bucket list? He wanted us to live it out? I shook my head. “What the hell are you talking about? What things?” This was the first I’d heard of any of it.
“You’ll find out what they are as you do them. You gotta give me some fun, right?”
I narrowed my eyes at him, not trusting the sneaking little smirk on his face. What was he up to? “I’m not jumping out of any planes or doing any nudie runs,” I warned.
“What? You’d deny your dying boyfriend of his final wishes?” Andy frowned. “What if I wanted you to jump out of a plane naked?”
“Then you’d be coming with me.”
“Okay, fine. I’ll save the skydiving and streaking for Seth. You’ll do it, right, man?”
Seth shrugged. “Sure, why not?” He winked at me and I blushed, the thought of him running naked along the beach not escaping my mind. Andy narrowed his eyes at me, a thoughtful expression on his face. I cringed, embarrassed at having being caught thinking like that about Seth in front of Andy. Not that he would have had any idea what I was thinking, but still.
“Good man. Okay, first stop is Willows Point. We need to be there at noon.”
“Why?” I already knew he wasn’t likely to answer.
“Be patient, Emsky,” he said patting my hand. “Oh, and wear your swimming suit.” I rolled my eyes at the use of my nickname. I freaking hated it when he called me that, and he knew it.
Chapter Eight
Seth
Willows Point—home to some of the biggest cliff fronts in the northern hemisphere. I had a strange feeling in my stomach that I wasn’t going to like why we were here.
“There we are,” Andy announced, pointing to a van in the far corner of the lot.
I squinted to make out the sign writing: Maximum Jump. Oh, fuck no.
“Cliff jumping?” I gasped. “You’ve got to be freaking kidding me, dude.”
Andy laughed. “You said you wanted to help. It’s on my list.” He shrugged, as if the whole thing was out of his hands. Emily stood behind Andy, giggling. “I don’t know why you’re giggling away, Emsky. You’re doing it, too.”
“The hell I am,” she exclaimed, her eyes widening. I laughed at her reaction. She made a face and flipped me her middle finger.
“If you don’t then I will,” he threatened.
God, he’s serious, too.
“Stop being such an ass, Andy.” She threw him an annoyed look.
“Guys,” he chastised, shaking his head. “These are things I wished I could’ve done. The whole idea is to live life, right? How much living have you two been doing the last few months?”
Em shifted on her seat next to me as my gaze fell downward. Fuck, he had this way of making you feel guilty for breathing.
“Fine. We’ll do it.” I sighed.
Em’s head shot up. “We will?” she squeaked.
I took hold of her hand and gently squeezed it.
She sighed, her breathing ragged. “Okay,” she said in a small voice.
“Great. This is going to be awesome. Trust me,” he said as I opened my door.
“Says the guy who gets to sit in his chair and watch,” I muttered.
“Ah, stop whining, Walkerson. You’re being a pussy.”
I laughed as I unloaded his chair. I was about to jump off a cliff, yet I was being a pussy?
Em grabbed his bag and a blanket, wrapping it around him. She looked hesitant to leave him. “Maybe I should stay with you,” she said.
“No need,” he replied cheerfully. He pointed to the entrance of the parking lot. I put my hand over my eyes to shield them from the sun and watched as a dark-blue Ford pulled into the spot next to us.
“Who is that?” Em asked, echoing my thoughts.
“I told you that you weren’t going to spend the next few weeks stressing about me, and I meant it. That’s Marta—the nurse I told you about.”
Marta looked to be in her fifties. Her graying hair was pulled back into a bun. She was dressed neatly in a pair of gray slacks and a green sweater. Her mouth moved into a tight smile as she acknowledged Em and me. “I’m guessing you’re Andrew?”
“What gave it away? Was it my handsome smile? Or maybe my ruggedly-built physique?” Andy grinned.
I groaned internally. Had he purposely chosen a nurse that completely reflected the opposite of his personality? Because that was something he would do.
“I must admit, when the agency told me to meet you out here I was confused.” She glanced around, her eyebrows rising as she spotted the van. “And now that I’m here, I’m still confused.”
“It’s simple, really: I’m making these two live out my bucket list while I’m still alive enough to enjoy it.”
Marta nodded slowly. “And watching them . . .” She squinted at the van. “. . . cliff-jump is going to give you joy?” she asked as she crossed her arms over her chest.
“If you knew these two, you wouldn’t even have to ask. She’s scared of heights,” he said, pointing at Em, “and he’s just a pussy.”
I rolled my eyes. Marta shrugged and took control of the chair. We walked over to the van where a guy in a bright pink and orange T-shirt and ripped jeans was waiting for us. I eyed the ropes and harnesses that were piled in the back of the van.
“Hey, you must be Emily, Seth, and Andy. I’m Pete.”
I shook his outstretched hand, noting his strong Australian accent. His long scruffy blonde hair was in dire need of a wash. He looked like he hadn’t seen a shower in months, and his glazed over expression made me wonder if he was high.
I was supposed to trust this guy with my life?
“Nice to meet you,” I said as he threw an old black wetsuit at me.
“Chuck that on. And one for you.” He threw an identical one at Emily. “What about you, old girl?” he asked Marta.
She narrowed her eyes at him, crossing her arms over her chest again.
“I’ll take that as a no.” He chuckled. “You get changed and meet me at the van. I’ll run through the jump, and then you’ll be set. Cool?”
“Sure. Cool,” I replied as Andy sniggered, his video camera in hand. Yeah, laugh it up, Andy. He was already enjoying this way too much.
Em and I got changed back over at my car. We both wore our swimsuits under our clothes, so it took literally a few seconds to strip off our clothes and pull on the wetsuits. Mine was too small and felt constricting in places I didn’t want it to be. I glanced at Em, pretending I didn’t notice how sexy she looked in her tight suit.
“So, you’ll be harnessed to this. It’s all pretty simple, really. The only thing you want to remember is when you jump, jump out—otherwise you run the risk of splattering yourself all over the rocks.” The color drained from Em’s face as her eyes widened. Pete laughed. “Nah, I’m kidding. It’s pretty safe. The key is to pick a jump that allows for deviation.”
“So there’s no chance of…” Em’s voice trailed off as she looked out over the cliff. If I didn’t feel so sorry for her I would’ve laughed. She looked terrified.
“Hitting the rock? No. I’ve been doing this for ten years, honey. Believe it or not, I know what I’m doing.”
Em blushed and took a step closer to me, her hand falling into mine. I squeezed it and gave her a wink. “I’ll go first, okay? I’ll be down there waiting for you.”
She nodded. “Okay. Let’s just get this over with.”
Stepping forward, I waited as Pete hooked up my harness and ran through some last minute tips. I felt dizzy as I looked out over the drop. Holy shit, that’s a long way down. If I said I wasn’t shitting myself, I’d be lying.
“Here we go,” I mumbled under my breath. One, two, three. I sprinted for the edge and jumped. For a split second, it felt like everything stopped, except f
or the pounding in my chest as I floated down. I hit the water with a massive splash, surfacing a few seconds later.
Holy fucking shit, that was amazing. I laughed and floated on top of the water, staring up at Em and Pete at the top of the cliff. I can’t believe I just did that.
“Come on, Em!” I yelled as she stood back from the edge. I laughed, reliving in my mind those few seconds before the leap. And then she jumped. She screamed as she hurtled toward the water, disappearing under the surface below me.
“Oh my god.” She bounced up from beneath the water, her eyes wide. “Did I really just hurl myself off a cliff?”
I laughed and began swimming toward the shore. “You did well, Em. How terrifying was it, just standing up there and looking down?”
“I know,” she laughed, her cheeks flushed with color. “I just can’t believe we did that.”
We stumbled onto the shore and sat down on the sand. I breathed in heavily, the adrenaline still racing through my veins. I lay back and stared up at the top of the cliff. It looked even more terrifying from down here.
“That was . . . insane,” I finished. Holy shit, that was up there as being one of the best experiences of my life. Rolling onto my side, I studied her as she lay there with her eyes closed. She had the biggest smile on her face I’d seen in months.
“I want to do it again.” She grinned. “Do you think we can?”
I jumped to my feet and reached out for her hand, pulling her up. She stumbled into my arms. I curled them around her waist to stop her from falling. I tried to stop myself from staring at her, but it was hopeless. She looked so beautiful, with her damp, messed hair and a splash of red in her cheeks. Her hold on me didn’t weaken; her eyes didn’t falter. I pulled away, confused by the moment. I could’ve sworn there had been something there.
I had to have imagined it. There was no way . . . was there?
“Let’s go find out,” I said with a grin.
***
We reached the top of the cliff, courtesy of Pete’s partner, Lacey, who had been waiting for us down by the water in a beat up old Honda. Andy was nowhere in sight. I saw Marta and jumped out of the car as it slowed to a stop.
“Is he okay?” I asked, worried about him.
“He’s fine—he’s just a little tired. Don’t worry, he got the whole thing on tape,” she added with a smile. “He’s asked for me to take him home.”
I nodded. “Of course. We’ll be right behind you.”
“No, he wants you to stay here. He is very insistent on you making sure the girl has fun.” She lowered her voice so Em wouldn’t hear. “I’ve only known the kid for a few hours, but he loves her. He’s not concerned about himself at all. Everything is about creating memories for that one.”
Memories that he should be creating with her, not me.
“Okay.” I nodded. “Will you stay with him until we get back?”
She burst into laughter. “Honey, he’s hired me to stay with him twenty-four seven.”
I wondered if Em knew about that.
“What’s going on? Is he okay?” Em came racing over to me as Marta walked off.
“He’s fine, just tired. He wants us to keep going. Marta is going to stay for a few days, apparently.”
“Oh. Okay.” She took a step back, her brow creasing. I got the feeling she felt like she’d been replaced.
“Em, he wants you to have fun. He wants the last few weeks of his life to be full of memories that are going to make you smile, not cry.”
“I know. I get that, it’s just . . .” She shook her head. “I can’t turn things off. I can’t pretend everything is fine, because it’s not.”
“Come on. Get changed.” I pushed her toward the van, my hands resting on her shoulders. She was right: nothing was going to change reality, but I was going to try my hardest to help her escape from it for at least a little while.
“Why?” she asked, unzipping her wetsuit. “I thought we were going again.”
“Nope.” I shrugged my own suit off and stepped out of it, reaching for my towel to wrap it around my waist. “I’ve got a better idea.”
She groaned. “God, I’ve had enough of surprises for one day,” she muttered.
I grinned. I was sure she was going to like this one. My heart pounded as she lowered her wetsuit. Her black shorts clung to her like a second skin while her pink bikini top pushed up her cleavage. She reached for a towel and began to dry her hair.
Every tiny detail I noticed: the way the ends of her hair flicked trails of water down the length of her arms; the way she smiled as the sun hit her face; the way her body curved, creating the sexiest silhouette I’d ever seen.
I dragged my eyes away from her, but not before Pete met my gaze. He gave me a knowing smile. Great. I needed to pull myself together. Bundling up my clothes, I thanked Pete and told Em I’d meet her back at the car.
Pulling my T-shirt over my head, I grabbed my phone. Six missed calls. Numerous texts from Deb and my mom. I groaned. They were both going to kill me.
Flicking open a message to Mom, I texted her.
I’m doing what I need to do for Andy. Please understand. I promise to call if anything happens.
I shut my phone off. There was a pretty good chance she would try and call as soon as the message went through, and I didn’t want to deal with that right now.
“Everything okay?” Em asked, sliding into the passenger’s seat.
“Sure. Just going through the texts and missed calls,” I said dryly.
“I brought a disposable with me.” Em grinned. “I left my actual cell at home. I knew I’d cave if Deb got through to me. This way, I can’t.”
“Clever,” I said with a smile. “Kinda sneaky, but clever.”
“I can be sneaky.” She smiled, buckling up her belt.
I snorted.
“What?” she said, her tone indignant. “I can be.”
“Bullshit. You are way too much of a good girl,” I teased.
Her cheeks colored as she leaned over and hit me. “Shut up. Ask Andy how much of a bad girl I can be,” she shot back.
“I’d rather not.” I made a face and she blushed an even deeper red.
“You have a dirty mind. I wasn’t referring to anything sexual.”
“Okay, repeat what you said to me in your head. Do you blame me for thinking that was sexual?” I chuckled as she went red again. Fuck, she was adorable.
She burst out laughing. “I guess not.” She glanced around. “So where are we going, anyway?”
Out of the corner of my eye, I watched her as she gathered her hair up in a loose ponytail. Just when I thought she couldn’t get any more beautiful . . .
What would things be like after Andy was gone? I hated admitting it, but I was terrified about our friendship changing. The only thing worse than not having her as my girl was losing her altogether.
I’d never lost anyone. I had no idea how death would change our dynamics. Would seeing me remind her of Andy? My heart ached at the thought of not having her in my life.
“Seth?” Em raised her eyebrows at me.
“Huh? Sorry,” I muttered. “No, I’m not telling you where we are going. But I will tell you that first we are going to get some dinner.”
“And what’s for dinner?” she asked suspiciously.
“Hamburgers?” I suggested. “There is a great little diner not far from the beach house.”
“Hamburgers sound nice.” She smiled. “Seth?” she hesitated. “Do you mind if we have dinner and then go home? I don’t really feel up to anything right now.”
“Sure,” I said, trying to hide my disappointment. It made sense that she’d want to be with Andy while he wasn’t well. And besides, the carnival would still be there tomorrow.
Andy might not.
Chapter Nine
Seth
Monday morning, the first thing I did was call work. I told them I was sick and wouldn’t be in. I had a few cases coming up which I knew I’d have to finis
h the reports for and send them to my boss, but that could wait until later. Right now, Andy was all that mattered.
After a pretty good night’s sleep, he was up and smiling. He had more color in his face, and I could see glimpses of my old friend in his eyes.
“Want to get drunk on the beach?” I asked Andy.
His eyes lit up as he grinned at me. “You’ll have to carry me out there,” he warned with a chuckle.
“So, not much different from college, huh?” I joked. The number of times I’d had to go haul his drunken ass home was ridiculous. “I’ll get Em.”
“Don’t,” Andy said suddenly. “I thought it would be nice just you and me.”
I nodded, a little taken aback. It was rarely just him and me; it was always the three of us. I quickly scrawled down a note for her so she wouldn’t worry, then went to the fridge and grabbed a six-pack of beer.
“Here,” I said, giving it to him to nurse while I pushed his chair. “Do you need anything first?”
“Nope. I’m good.”
I pushed the chair down to the edge of the sand and then hoisted him out and over my shoulder.
“This is fucked up, man.” He laughed.
Yep, I was carrying a grown man over my shoulder. I guess it was pretty funny. Laying him down on the sand, I popped open a can and handed it to him.
“Are you sure you can drink?” I asked him doubtfully.
He shrugged. “No, but what’s it going to do? Kill me?” he sniggered. Good point. “Marta might kill you for feeding me alcohol, though.”
“Yeah, well, she can get in line,” I joked.
“Has she called much? Mom?” he asked.
“Yeah. Every day. I texted my mom and told her you were fine.”
“Em bought a disposable.” He chuckled. “She didn’t want to risk ratting me out.”
“I heard,” I said, shaking my head. “So . . . how are you?”
“Jesus, dude, will you stop asking me how I am?” he said, rolling his eyes. “No different from the last ten times you asked.”
Shit. The thing was, I always felt like I never knew what to say. I tried to act like myself around him, like nothing was different, but it was.
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