“Let me get a shower in before I change,” Garrett says, though he gives no real indication as to whether he’s going to Minnie’s or Mrs. Parks’.
“We’ll wait for you.” Beth holds tight to his side, beaming at him, and like she doesn’t want to let him go. “And I can go to Minnie’s if you promise to get me to Mrs. Parks’ by nine.”
“So, that gives us like a half hour max?” Mike rolls his eyes. “Maybe it’s just a me and Paige kind of night.” Then he puts his arm around me and pulls me toward him and looks at me like we’re a team, probably trying to prove to everyone else he isn’t just counting down the days until we break up.
“No,” Evan says, staring straight at us and crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m going even if I have to ditch Lexi.”
“Yeah, me too,” Garrett echoes with his eyes trained on me.
I start to laugh because their responses are so fervent, but I stop because something feels out of whack, and it’s making me uneasy. There is something so subtle in their stance that makes it seem as though they weren’t really responding to Mike or the way he pulled me closer, but to one another, as if they are offering some kind of challenge that only they understand. This feeling in my gut gives a little more weight to the near kiss from Evan I know I didn’t imagine. And the way Garrett has his brown eyes trained on me, the way he found me in the crowd and not Beth, makes me believe, just for a moment, that Evan and Garrett are secretly fighting over me.
No.
Utterly ridiculous.
So, I laugh.
“What’s so funny?” Mike says with an entertained smile.
“Nothing,” I say, trying not to look at Evan or Garrett. “Absolutely nothing.”
I’m the one who eventually finds Lexi. She’s reapplying makeup in the inadequately sized restroom near the bleachers, hogging one of the two sinks I’m sure someone else might want to use to actually wash their hands. I tell her that the plan is to go to Minnie’s, to which she sticks her finger just outside her open mouth.
“Well, Evan’s waiting for you,” I say, only caring whether she’ll go with us or not because of him.
“So, make him wait then.” She’s about to start on her other eyelash, reapplying mascara that doesn’t need to be reapplied when I grab her arm.
“You need to stop,” I say, me being the one who stops myself from saying more, from telling her she needs to quit being a bitch.
She shakes me off, gives me a death glare, but then exits the bathroom without another word. She’s beyond moody when she sees Evan and demands he take her home, “right this very instant.”
Evan goes around in circles, trying to get out of giving in to her demands that will no doubt include coddling her for several hours while the rest of us are at Minnie’s.
But he gives in, like he always has since they seriously started dating the summer before our senior year. They’d only been a blip on the radar back at the eighth grade dance.
“Guess I’m not going,” he says with his eyes trained on mine while Lexi stands a few feet away, pouting even though she’s already gotten what she wanted.
“I’ll see you Monday I guess,” I say to him before he takes off, most of our interactions reduced to seeing one another at school or in group activities where Lexi monopolizes him every chance she gets.
“Yeah,” he says, looking more than a little forlorn.
Lexi leaves me with a nasty glare, one I don’t even bother returning. But as they walk away, I’m left with a mix of relief and bleakness, relief that I don’t have to try to figure out what that earlier near kiss was all about, and bleakness for the ever-shrinking time I’ll have with Evan before he goes to North Carolina next summer.
Once Lexi and Evan are out, Beth gets a text from Mrs. Parks asking her if she can come earlier than planned. A freshly showered Garrett offers to drop her off before he joins Mike and I, and she looks as though she’s just been torpedoed at the idea of only being “dropped off.” Quite embarrassingly, she begs him to hang out with her so she doesn’t lose her mind babysitting the earlier mentioned terror all on her own. And like the gentleman he is, he begrudgingly agrees and then tosses me a disappointed look.
“Looks like it’s just you and me after all, kid,” Mike says, imitating the way guys talk in old gangster movies.
“Sure is,” I say, my mixed feelings about pretty much everything still standing.
Mike can be all kinds of fun, but as we sit amongst the truckers and foul-mouthed waitresses, I’m really missing Evan and Garrett who are usually good at bouncing jokes off of one another, even if Garrett gets all red faced when they turn dirty or Lexi gets into one of her moods and tries to bring the entire table down with her. I miss Evan always ordering a beer, just to prove he can, the waitresses at Minnie’s never carding him because he could pass for twenty-two or twenty-three while Mike’s baby face only gets him soft drinks.
“This is so good,” Mike says for the third time, obsessed over his burger that’s dripping grease and globs of cheese all over his plate. I wonder how many poor animals had to die in order to create something so unappetizing.
“It looks gross,” I say, focusing on my giant plate of fries and the crisp carbonation of my Coke.
“You’re just jealous because you’ve turned your back on meat,” he says, wiping the grease off of his hands.
“I’m hardly jealous,” I say and toss a fry into his lap.
After we finish eating, Mike drives me straight home. He says he’s sorry if he’s been a jerk lately, has been too honest for his own good, or has failed in any number of other boyfriend categories. I tell him not to worry and flash him that same smile. Sadly, the thought of our relationship ending in six months just isn’t something to get too upset about.
“You haven’t worn your fuzzy red coat yet this year,” Mike says after I loosen my seat belt.
I shrug. “I gave it away. It didn’t feel like me anymore.”
“Gave it away? I loved that coat!” Next to Garrett, Mike is probably the most conservative dresser at Basin Lake High, his hair always cut perfectly short, his jeans just the right length and fit, and his shirts always basic, never with graphics or outlandish colors. It’s like he doesn’t want anyone to notice him, and yet he’s said more than once that he’d always been drawn to me for the exact opposite. He liked that I stood out, maybe not just for my wardrobe but for the fact that I’m tall for a girl—between five foot seven and five foot eight depending on who’s measuring—and am from the biggest city in the state, which can either be romanticized or demonized in our little town.
“It’s just not really me anymore,” I say, having ditched a lot of the outlandish patterns and materials I used to wear in exchange for a wardrobe that borders on the mainstream, save for the dark nail polish and bright colors I occasionally wear to remind myself I’ll never be the follower I accused Britt, Trinity, Beth and Lexi of being back in the fourth grade.
“I guess not,” he says with a bit of melancholy. “Sometimes I just miss the old you.”
“So that’s why you can’t wait to get rid of me?” I say it with innocent sarcasm.
He looks down for a moment and then looks at me quite seriously. “I wish we could work long term,” he says, “but you know…”
Do I know? I’m really not sure except for the fact there just isn’t a spark with Mike—that died out somewhere in the tenth grade, our trips to Spokane and our make-out sessions last summer one of the few things keeping us afloat.
Before I can respond to him—not that I had anything particularly important to say—he makes a move, stretching his arm across the seat behind me and drawing his face close to mine. He closes his eyes, and I’m guessing he’s going in for a kiss, maybe even with tongue, but his heater barely works, and it’s too cold to lock lips on a night like tonight. So I give him a saintly kiss and make a run for it.
CHAPTER THREE
EVAN
I should be all levels of bummed that tonight
was the last Friday football game of our high school lives, but I’m not. Since tenth grade, I’ve been inwardly pissed that I got kicked off the team and have had to watch Garrett and my buddies out there while I’ve been stuck in the stands. It’s not because of any athletic shortcomings that I got pushed off but because of what my dad used to call “poor life choices.” He seemed to think I’d made a lot of them, but now that he lives in Charlotte, North Carolina, I hear a little less about how much I’ve disappointed him.
The only thing I’ll miss about Friday nights in the fall is how close I got to sit to Paige and how for a few hours I could kind of ignore the fact that my girlfriend, Lexi, was on my other side, grabbing onto me like a vice grip. Before her, it had been Amanda, then Becka, briefly Salina, followed by Jennifer Peters and then Jennifer Cartwright until she and her family moved to Spokane at the end of junior year. None of them lasted because none of them were Paige.
It’s been both heavenly and tortuous to be so close and not be able to do anything but smile or maybe hug her. All I ever really wanted was to keep my arm around her and kiss her on the lips and not even give a shit about the game. But she and Mike have been solid since the eighth grade, though that’s finally beginning to deteriorate.
What the fuck is Mike’s deal anyway?
He’s been my friend since we were in pre-school, and we played soccer together until we aged out in the eighth grade. We’ve had some good times, but I’ve seriously wanted to kick his ass lately. For whatever reason, Paige saw fit to couple up with him when she could literally have anyone in this town, and now he can’t wait to get rid of her. Every chance he gets, he mentions the fragility of high school romance and how it’s all just a phase of life and whatever other bullshit he feels like spewing.
Where is he even getting that stuff?
“I’m still mad at you,” Lexi tells me, sitting on her bed while I’m in the chair in front of her desk and trying to figure out why the hell I’m with Lexi at this moment when I should be with Paige at Minnie’s. She’s alone with Mike, and I can only imagine what kind of crap he’s filling her mind with about how he can’t wait to spread his wings and fly out of her life.
“Yeah, I know,” I say, trying not to sound pissed off at her for fear of pushing her over the edge.
“You know, it’s going to be really hard without you here.” She’s under her covers, sitting up, her arms crossed over her chest, and now she’s starting to cry.
Fuck. My. Life.
“I’ll be a phone call away,” I remind her, sitting up and trying to look as though I care, which I do, but honestly I could do without this, without being Lexi’s anchor and attempting to keep her from crumbling. I owe it to her, but man if I don’t get tired of it.
“It’s not the same!” she sputters out. “I just don’t get why you have to go to North Carolina anyway.”
“Because I do,” I say. Jesus, if it were up to me, I’d be going to WSU where I could be close to Paige, where I could see her almost every single day. But even if, by some miracle, that happened, I’d still have to hand Lexi off to someone else. I’ve tried to be her crutch for the nearly six months we’ve officially been together, but I can’t go on doing it forever.
“You could have tried harder,” she says, sniffling and giving me a cold stare. “And I still don’t understand why you don’t want me there—probably because of Paige, but at least she won’t be anywhere near you either.”
I sigh and rub a hand through my hair.
Paige.
I almost kissed her tonight. I was so close. If Garrett hadn’t interrupted us, I think I would have and not given a single fuck as to what the fallout would have been. I would have told Mike he was shit out of luck and told Lexi I was sorry, but my feelings for Paige have been brewing for the last eight years and just couldn’t be helped.
“You know, Garrett at least pretends he cares about Beth,” she continues in an accusatory way. “He doesn’t tell her that she should go off with the first guy in this town who thinks she’s hot.”
“That’s not what I said.” I shake my head, feeling a headache coming on, exasperated by Lexi’s constant accusations about what a horrible boyfriend I am. And it’s always Garrett who is so much better even though it’s obvious to me he’s just biding his time. Maybe he and Beth are still having sex—I really don’t know—but he’s not going to continue their relationship once he’s at WSU. How would he have the time with football and all? He’s going to have to hook up with girls that are already there. Girls like Paige.
Shit.
I hate the thought. Them hooking up is one of my darkest nightmares. But it’s totally possible because of the proximity they’ll have at WSU, and I could swear he threw the gauntlet down tonight. When I said I was going to Minnie’s with Paige even if I had to ditch Lexi—if only I could have—he got all territorial looking. Maybe I was just seeing things, but I didn’t like it.
“I can’t trust anything you say!” Lexi says, burying her face in the pillow on her lap.
I lean back in the chair, knowing there’s nothing I can say that will ease Lexi’s suffering or the anger she has at me. I’ve allowed myself to be her punching bag for the last half or our relatively brief relationship because I’ve wronged her, and I’ve wanted to do the right thing, to not be the loser my parents and stepdad seem to think I am. But is any of it worth it?
Maybe I should finally do something for myself. Maybe I should finally tell Paige how I really feel, even if I’m likely to get struck down. Maybe then I can finally sleep without that empty feeling in my gut.
CHAPTER FOUR
PAIGE
“Early night?” Mom, Claire and Kate are in front of the TV when I walk through the front door of our small, aging house. Technically, it’s Grandma Gertrude’s house, the one we were just supposed to stay in until we got our own, but Mom has since taken over the mortgage, and she reminds me time and time again that raising three daughters on a high school teacher’s salary isn’t exactly cheap, even in a small town like Basin Lake.
“I guess so.” I check my phone, and it’s just after nine.
“I saw they won.” Mom stretches her arms out as my two younger sisters appear to be enthralled by a horror movie on Netflix.
“Garrett threw for the winning touchdown,” I say proudly. Mom is usually at the games with the girls, but they wanted to sled down what barely passes as a hill in the back of the house while there was still a little daylight left, and Grandma hasn’t been feeling so good, so Mom stayed home.
“Nice way to end his high school career. Did you celebrate?”
“Not really. Just went to Minnie’s with Mike. Evan had to take Lexi home, and Garrett dropped Beth off at Mrs. Parks’,” I say and hang my damp jacket on the coat rack behind the door before plopping down on our well-used couch next to Mom. “Is Grandma feeling better?”
“She’s out like a light,” Mom says. “Doctor prescribed her a new medication that’s making her pretty sleepy.”
“Maybe she shouldn’t take them then,” I say. I miss how lively Grandma used to be. Now she seems to spend most of her time in her bedroom upstairs, sleeping, knitting countless hats, scarves and afghans, or watching TV instead of being with us in the small, but cozy, living room.
“Oh, honey,” Mom says like she wants to tell me more about Grandma’s condition but doesn’t have the heart. So, instead, she allows a few moments of silence to pass before she asks me, “How’s Mike? He dropped you off pretty quick, didn’t he?”
I shrug. “Mike is Mike.”
“Shhh…” Claire snarls. She’s sprawled out on the floor in front of the TV, and I can tell she’s been trying to ignore us until now.
“Hmm…” Mom pats my thigh, ignoring her middle daughter.
“Hmm, what?”
“Oh, nothing,” Mom says. “It’s just that I can think of two other boys who I think would get more than a shrug when I ask about them.”
“Stop,” I say, rolling my
eyes. She’s talking about Evan and Garrett of course. “They’re just my friends.”
Kate turns around from her seat on the floor and says, “I have a crush on Garrett,” in a proud, goading way that only a twelve-year-old can.
“Would you guys shut up?” Claire pauses the movie. “You’re seriously ruining the best part!”
“You girls can finish watching in my room, okay?” Mom says, looking tired and like she’d rather fall asleep watching the movie in her bed than down here on the couch anyway.
“Fine.” Claire gets up and throws me the evil eye. “Come on Kate.”
Kate grabs the big bowl of popcorn they’d been sharing before running up the stairs to follow Claire.
“Don’t get too scared,” I call after them, teasing Claire but being a bit more serious with Kate since she still gets nightmares from PG-rated Halloween movies. Mom’s bedroom door slams shut in response, and Mom and I just look at one another like we’d expect nothing less from Claire.
“You should invite them over.” Mom stops the movie and sets the TV to some random channel. “It’s Friday night, and you should be hanging out with your friends and celebrating a big win while you still have the chance, not stuck with me.”
I laugh at that. “Because hanging out with you is so awful.”
“Life is short, honey. You don’t realize how short. And you should spend it with the people you really love.”
I sigh. “Like I don’t love you and my sisters?”
“You know what I mean,” she says. “With friends your own age, especially a certain friend who will be moving across the country and another one who will be up to his eyeballs with everything that goes along with being a college football player.”
“Would you stop with the love connection?” I say, knowing Mom’s words are laced with romantic ideation. “Friendships just get ruined when they become more, don’t they?” I give her a look like I’ve beaten her, like I’m the one being smart about my relationships at the tender age of seventeen while my mother is lost in the clouds. And yet she’s hit a chord because I’ve secretly been wishing for the same thing for years, at least where Evan is concerned.
Between the Boys (The Basin Lake Series Book 1) Page 3