“I can’t speak for Jed, but I could see you were workin’ out some personal demons. Lord knows I have plenty of my own that I struggle with. I love you, Neely Kate. If you need to spend a day lookin’ for a lost girl to deal with yours, I’ll gladly give it to you.” I put my hand on her shoulder and looked her in the eye. “But I wish you’d share your nightmares with me. You know I won’t judge you.”
She gave me a weak smile. “I’m workin’ my way up to it. I’ll get there.”
“And I’ll be here to listen whenever you’re ready.”
She pushed me toward a kitchen chair. “Drink your coffee before it’s cold.”
I sat down and took a sip, and she took the seat across from me.
“We need to call Kermit,” I said. “He’s gonna be ticked he didn’t make any money off this one.”
She grinned. “I already called him. I’m a little deaf in one ear, but he’ll get over it. Even he can hardly blame us that our client was killed.”
We sat in silence for a few seconds before Neely Kate leaned over, cradling her coffee cup and looking up at me. “Today’s the day you’re supposed to give an answer to Skeeter. Have you made up your mind yet?”
I shook my head. But that vision of me in bed with him, wearing an engagement ring . . . that had kept me up into the small hours of the morning. Had James asked Carter Hale to change his will because of whatever we were discussing in bed? Did it mean I should have done something different last night?
“Rose, do you want my opinion about your answer?”
She shook me out of my musing. “You’ve already told me your opinion,” I said with a sad smile. “Many times.”
“I’ve been thinkin’ about it since our last conversation.” She paused. “It’s obvious you and I see two different men, and Jed swears you make Skeeter a better person. I still think it’s a bad idea, but there’s no denyin’ you have a thing for him, and the heart wants what the heart wants.”
“So you’re tellin’ me I should say yes.”
She hesitated. “I’m not going to tell you what to do. Only you can do that, but I know you haven’t been happy these past two weeks, Violet aside. You miss him. There’s no denyin’ that. And we both know he makes you happy.” She gave me a soft smile. “But I’m scared for you. Bein’ with Skeeter Malcolm is dangerous. So if you say yes, be careful. With your heart and everything else.”
“Thanks.”
* * *
I went upstairs to get ready for the day. After I was dressed and ready to leave, I stopped in Marshall’s room before I headed downstairs.
He was sitting up in bed with a somber expression, looking a little older and hopefully wiser than when he’d first shown up in my barn.
“I hear you’re goin’ home today,” I said.
He jumped, looking startled, then settled down. “Yep. Jed said I should be good to go.”
“Where will you go?”
“Back home, I guess.” He stared down at his lap, makin’ it clear he wasn’t happy about it.
“I don’t think there’s any evidence tying you to the robbery, and Kip Wagner’s dead. I don’t think you’ll have to be lookin’ over your shoulder.”
He nodded. “I heard you were the one to kill him.”
I didn’t correct him. I was sure he wasn’t the last person who would mention it over the next few days.
I moved to the side of his bed. “Marshall, you’ve been given a gift. You’ve been given a second chance. Make it a clean slate and stick to the straight and narrow. Find a girl who deserves the risks you’ll take for her. Find happiness in the small things, not the moments of excitement. Don’t waste all the effort I spent tryin’ to keep you safe. Make me proud, and always know you have a place here if you need it. My farm will be your refuge.”
He stared up at me, then swallowed. “You saved my life, Lady. Thank you. If you ever need anything from me, ask and I’ll give it. Whatever it is.”
I gave him a soft smile. “The only thing I ask is that you live a good and full life.” I leaned forward and placed a kiss on his forehead. “Goodbye, Marshall.”
* * *
Bruce Wayne’s crew looked surprised to see me when I showed up an hour later with Muffy in tow. My hair was pulled back into a ponytail, and I was wearing a RBW Landscaping T-shirt, jeans, and work boots, making it obvious I hadn’t just shown up for a chat.
As soon as Bruce Wayne saw me, he brought me a shovel and gave me a task, no questions asked. There was no way he didn’t know I’d been part of a quadruple murder the night before, and he had to know I’d need to exorcise some demons.
I’d worked with most of the crew before during the spring, so they didn’t baby me. They knew I could pull my weight. They left me to myself, as though they recognized I was working things out too. Besides, they didn’t need me for entertainment, not when they had Muffy. They spoiled her rotten.
It was a hot day, and I wasn’t used to working out in the sun, so Bruce Wayne made me take an extra water break around two, saying he wanted to discuss an install he had in a couple of days.
We sat under a shade tree, and he briefly discussed some minor issues he foresaw before falling silent. We sat like that for nearly a minute before he asked, “Are you still playing your role as the Lady in Black?”
I had a moment of panic that the crew could hear us, but they were too far away, and it didn’t really matter. My secret identity was out, more or less.
“If you’d asked me yesterday morning, I would have wholeheartedly said yes.”
“And now?”
“Now I’m not so sure. I think Wagner was right. It’s naïve to think I can make a difference.”
“But you are, Rose.”
I turned to look at him. “What?”
“You’re makin’ a difference. Word’s gotten out about that kid.”
The blood rushed from my head. “What kid?”
He narrowed his eyes. “The kid that got shot during the Ripper Pawn robbery. They say you took him in and held off Wagner’s men to protect him.”
I nearly passed out with fear. “How many people know?”
“Don’t worry. Joe Simmons won’t find out.” He paused. “Believe it or not, a lot of guys who follow men like Dermot and Wagner and Skeeter can be loyal to their own, in their own strange way. Now a lot of them will be loyal to you. Their lives are shit, and they need to know they belong somewhere—and when things go south . . . well, now they think they can come to you for help. You’re like their Wendy in Peter Pan.”
I stared at him wide-eyed. “I think this is too big for me to handle. I almost got myself killed by a guy named Gerard and his mountain men sons, all because I was cocky and thought I could handle myself.”
It was his turn to stare at me wide-eyed. “Gerard Collard?”
“I don’t know his last name. He lives in the woods with no electricity or running water.”
He let out a low whistle. “That’s him. He’s bad news, Rose. Stay away from him.”
“He kind of didn’t leave me a choice. His son showed up and invited me at gunpoint. I guess I could have run away or screamed. Brox probably wouldn’t have shot me, but I went anyway and got all sassy because I got too big for my britches.”
“There’s no denyin’ you seem to find danger, and I understand if you want to stop, but you’ve given a lot of guys hope. Just remember that.”
I leaned my temple on his shoulder. “Thanks, Bruce Wayne. I needed to hear that.”
“That’s what partners are for.”
* * *
We finished the job around four, and Muffy and I headed home, where I took a long, hot shower and then headed to bed for a nap. It was raining when I woke, and I could see it was getting dark outside. I grabbed my phone to check the time—nearly eight o’clock. Neely Kate had sent a text that she was spending the night with Jed, but she promised to come straight home if I didn’t want to be alone.
I texted her back, assuring her I was fine,
before I remembered that I still needed to give James an answer. What was I going to tell him?
Should I follow my head or my heart? I decided to follow my instincts. They hadn’t failed me yet. I sent James a text.
I have my answer. Can I meet you at your house? I want to tell you in person.
He answered about ten seconds later.
9:00?
See you then.
* * *
A storm was brewing to the west when I left home. Muffy hated thunderstorms, so I took her with me, holding her close when I carried her out to my truck. She cuddled on my lap during the drive, hiding her head when the rain began to come down in sheets.
Between the rain and the dark, I nearly missed the turn onto James’ gravel driveway a few minutes after nine. I parked in his circular driveway in front of the front door and worried that I’d beat him there. The only lights in the house were the soft glow emanating from the shuttered living room windows.
I rubbed Muffy’s head. “Just wait here, girl. This should only take a few minutes.”
She gave a soft whine when I set her down on the seat.
James didn’t have a roof over his front door, so I dug under the seat and grabbed an umbrella. Cinching my thin raincoat around my body, I left the car, popped the umbrella, and ran up to the porch.
The front door opened before I knocked, and James started to back up so I could come in. His face was an emotionless mask.
“Wait,” I said, clutching the umbrella tighter as a gust of wind tried to lift it up. “I have a few things I need to say.”
He moved back into the doorway and waited. He looked so tempting in his jeans and the pale gray V-neck T-shirt that showed off the curve of his pecs and his thickly muscled arms. His hair was damp like he’d just taken a shower—or a walk in the rain.
Focus, Rose. I almost chucked my speech, but if I didn’t say it now, it might never be said.
“First,” I said. “Your world scares me. I know I’ve jumped in feetfirst to be part of it, but yesterday . . .” I took a breath. “While I’ve always known you’re involved with criminal activities, I saw some things that really brought it close to home. I struggle to reconcile the man I see standing in front of me with the cold, ruthless man other people see.”
“I know,” he said softly.
“Second, if we were to do this, we would have to treat it like a dirty little secret. No showing you to my friends and family. No date nights at Jaspers. No walking down the sidewalk hand in hand. We’ll have to sneak around like we’re havin’ an affair. Like I’m ashamed of you. I hate that.”
He leaned into the doorframe, his bare feet and the bottom of his jeans getting wet from the rain bouncing off the porch onto him.
“My sister’s dyin’, James. She’s got months to live, but I suspect it’s gonna happen sooner than that. She’s made some super-secret changes to her will, and I’m pretty sure it has something to do with me bein’ able to see her kids after she dies, since my brother-in-law is convinced I’ll be a danger to them. And after the last few days—shoot, the last few months—who’s to say I’m not? And when she dies, if you and I were together, I’d need you.” My voice broke. “I’d need you by my side at her grave, and holding my hand during the visitation, and holding me in bed while I cried myself to sleep. But you couldn’t do any of that. If we were together, you couldn’t be with me when I need you the most.”
“I know, Rose.” His voice sounded strangled. “It kills me to know that I can’t.”
“Mason’s back, and he’s gonna move heaven and earth to bring you down, and I suspect he’s gonna try to use me to do it. Which means I’m dangerous. If we were smart, we’d end this right now.”
He didn’t respond.
“And last, I want a family. I want kids. I want to be married. I don’t want them now, but I know that I will, and you want none of those things. So I go into this knowing it’s a short-term commitment until either one of us decides we’re bored playing house or the other needs more. I’ve never done a short-term commitment. I’m not sure I can.”
He looked heartbroken. “I know.”
“And when I look at all those things, there’s one thing I do know.”
He looked down at my feet. “Rose, you don’t have to say it.”
“I want you.”
His gaze lifted in disbelief.
“I want you, James Malcolm, not Skeeter. Not the man the rest of the world sees, the mask you put on for the world. I want the man standing in front of me, the man who knows my faults and sees them as strengths. No other man . . . shoot, no other person has believed in me even half as much as you do. You see the woman I was meant to be, and you helped set her free.”
I stepped toward him and put my hand on his chest, and he covered it with his own. “I want you, James Malcolm. I want as much of you as I can get, and while there will likely come a day when you can no longer give me what I need, until then, I’m yours.”
He engulfed me in his arms, his mouth covering mine. I sank into him, the umbrella falling behind me so we were both getting drenched.
He hauled me inside, but I stopped him from shutting the door. “Wait.”
“You just told me that you’re mine,” he growled into my ear. “Don’t torture me, Rose.”
“Muffy’s in the truck. I had to bring her. She’s scared of thunderstorms. Neely Kate’s not home and—”
He bounded down the steps and opened the passenger door. Seconds later, he had Muffy snugged to his chest with one arm and the small overnight bag I’d left on the passenger seat. He ran up the steps and got inside just as lightning flashed across the sky and thunder boomed after.
Muffy whined louder and buried herself into his chest.
“You brought a bag,” he said as he dropped it to the floor.
“I can’t keep wearing your clothes home,” I teased.
He started to say something when thunder boomed again and Muffy snuggled closer.
I quickly shut the door, staring in amazement as he stroked her head. “It’s okay, girl,” he said softly. “You’re safe here.” His gaze lifted to mine. “You both are.”
His words and comfort settled her down, and she squirmed, letting him know she wanted down. He set her on the floor and let her wander around as he took a step toward me.
“Maybe I don’t want something safe right now,” I said in a husky tone. “Maybe I want something dangerous tonight.”
A low sound rumbled from his chest. “What about your dog?”
“Unless there’s a wild storm, as long as she knows I’m here, she’ll be all right.” I reached up with one hand and pulled his mouth back to mine while the other snaked around his back and pulled him flush to me.
That was all the encouragement he needed.
He kissed me so thoroughly I felt myself get lost in him. His mouth was on mine again and his hands were everywhere—in my hair, on my hip, sliding up my side to my breast over the raincoat.
I soaked him in, needing this and so much more. I blindly reached for the hem of his shirt and lifted. He broke contact, groaning, for long enough to pull his shirt over his head and then reach for the belt of my rain jacket. When he opened it, his eyes grew wide as he took in my white and black lace panties and bra.
“You drove here in this storm with nothin’ over this other than your raincoat?” he asked, his gaze still sweeping over my body.
He slowly pushed the coat over my shoulders until it fell to the floor, and I shivered, not from cold but from anticipation.
“When we’ve been together before, I never had on sexy underwear . . .” I grimaced.
His hands lightly skimmed down my waist to my hips, his gaze following. “You’re the sexiest goddamned thing I’ve ever seen. Don’t you dare apologize.” His eyes lifted to mine. “Don’t you get it, Rose? You’re what makes you sexy. Not what you’re wearin’.”
His mouth plundered mine as he quickly dispensed with my bra and panties, making them a nonissue
. As soon as my panties were gone, his hand slid between my folds.
“You’re so wet already,” he groaned into my ear, sounding like he was in pain. I felt how hard he was against me. Maybe he was in pain.
“I want you, James,” I moaned, lifting a leg up and around his waist. “Now.”
That was all the invitation he needed. He stripped off his jeans in seconds, then lifted me as he plunged in deep, pressing my back against the solid back door. Grabbing my hips, he held me steady as he drove in even deeper.
I clung to his shoulders as I stared up at him, overwhelmed by how much I needed this man. An entanglement with the king of the Fenton County underworld would surely lead me down the path of ruin, but at the moment, I couldn’t bring myself to care.
His eyes were dark and possessive as he claimed me. “Tell me you’re mine.”
“I’m yours,” I said in a husky voice I barely recognized. “And you’re mine.”
His mouth covered mine again, and I lost all sense of time and place as he filled me, taking me higher and higher until I was pleading with him to finish what he’d started.
When I came, I clung to him as wave after wave of pleasure washed over me, vaguely aware of him groaning my name as he gave one last push.
I was still pinned against the door, my legs wrapped around his waist as he leaned into me, his chest heaving as he recovered.
“Is this what it will be like with us?” I asked in wonder.
He lifted his head, a grin spreading across his face. “This is only the beginning, Lady.”
I grinned back, truly happy for the first time in months.
* * *
Up Shute Creek (Rose Gardner Investigations #4)
November 6, 2018
In High Cotton (Neely Kate Mystery #2)
July 31, 2018
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Hell in a Handbasket: Rose Gardner Investigations #3 Page 33