“She gave it to Levi?”
“Uh huh,” he said. “I didn’t know it was money, though. I thought maybe she was giving him drugs or something. She didn’t have any problem dealing backstage.”
I shook my head. My hands were starting to shake. Levi? Oh, he was holding things back from me, all right. He sure as hell was.
* * *
“Molly, what are you doing here? I thought I told you—”
I shoved the envelope in his face, pushing past him to get into his apartment. “You have an envelope like this? You have the rest of the fucking money?”
He stepped away from me. “Well, uh, yeah, I do. Cori gave it to me.”
“And you never thought to tell me that?”
He shut the door to his apartment. “Uh… I was going to tell you. I meant to tell you. I—”
“Bullshit, Levi,” I said. “You need to come clean now. You need to tell me everything that you haven’t told me.”
He dragged a hand over his face. “Look, Molly, when you and I first started working together, I wasn’t exactly in a position where I wanted to share every little detail with you. I was being cautious. And so I didn’t tell you that Cori gave me a third of the money to hold onto for her. And then later, I guess, it sort of slipped my mind. We’ve been focusing on who killed her, not on the money.” He gestured to the envelope I was holding. “Where’d you find that?”
“Jonah King,” I said. “Cori stuffed it in the bottom of a vase of silk flowers.”
He chuckled. “That sounds like something Cori would do.”
“You’re changing the subject,” I said. “You expect me to believe you when you say you forgot about two thousand dollars? Money I need to pay back Professor X?”
“It’s not like I forgot about the money. I just never got around to telling you about it.”
I folded my arms over my chest. “That’s convenient.”
“Look, it was always my plan to try to convince you to let me meet with Professor X. I was hoping that I’d be able to get you to agree to it. I knew I had two grand, and I figured I could get the other two grand, and then I could meet him—”
“And then infiltrate his group and kill everybody for what they did to your brother.”
Levi squeezed his eyes shut. “I’m not trying to kill them.”
“So, what’s the gun for, then?”
He turned away from me, clenching his hands into fists. “God damn it, Molly, stop asking about that shit. I can’t tell you.”
I sucked in breath. He didn’t want to come clean with me? Fine. I didn’t care about his stupid secrets anymore. “Whatever. Why don’t you just give me the money, then?”
He turned back. “What? I’m not doing that.”
“I need it,” I said. “I’m going to set up the meeting with Professor X, and all of this will be over.”
“You shouldn’t go to meet him. You give me your envelope. I’ll go.”
I stuffed the envelope into my purse. “No. I don’t trust you. Besides, when I left earlier tonight, you said you weren’t going to involve me in your little revenge scheme anymore. You said you wouldn’t use me. That’s what you’ve been doing this whole time, isn’t it? Using me?”
“No,” he said.
“No?” I crossed my arms over my chest. “This has always been about Professor X for you. It’s never been about me.”
He shook his head. “It’s been all about you. Sure, it was that envelope that made me notice you in the first place, but after that…” He stepped closer to me. “You don’t know. It’s like a typical, stupid girl thing. The only girl girl I’ve ever known who did know was Cori.”
“What don’t I know?”
“How fucking attractive you are. You think you just walk around at some party—a new girl no one’s seen before—and that no one’s noticing you. But everybody was. And I—” He shook his head again. “I knew that girls like you were off limits. But it was never this hard before. Because you’re so beautiful.”
I wasn’t sure how to take that. Part of me felt shy and embarrassed and flattered. But part of me thought he was losing his mind. “I’m not anything special, Levi. There are lots of other girls who are a lot prettier than me.”
“But are they driven like you are?” He raised his eyebrows. “You want justice for Cori, a girl you never met. You’re willing to put yourself in danger to make sure you find a way to do it. And that just… gets me.”
I bit down on my lip. I didn’t say anything.
He moved closer to me. “I know that right now, I should be doing everything to get you out of my apartment, because I don’t have any business trying anything with you.”
“You really don’t.” My heart was starting to pick up its pace from his nearness. “You lied to me about the money. You’re still lying to me about something.”
“So, why can’t I shove you out the door?” His voice had dropped several octaves. “Why is that all I want to do is touch you?”
My breath caught in my throat. “You don’t get to act like that. I’m angry with you.” But I didn’t sound angry. I sounded excited.
“You probably should be.” He touched my face, running the back of his knuckles over my cheek. “But I want you to understand something. The stuff with Professor X, yes, maybe I was using you. But the stuff between us? You and me together? That’s never been… I never want to hurt you. I care about you.”
I swallowed. “Then why did you kick me out earlier?”
He shut his eyes. “I was trying to do the right thing.”
“The right thing? Why is being away from me the right thing?”
“Because… you’re too young.”
“I’m not that young.”
His voice dropped to a husky whisper. “It doesn’t matter. I can’t handle it, anyway. I want to do the wrong thing, Molly. I want to do the wrong thing with you over and over and over and—”
I kissed him.
He caught me in his arms, crushing me against him.
I molded myself against his body, loving the feeling of his strong arms encircling me, loving the feeling of his mouth on mine, his tongue on mine.
He slammed me up against the wall, his mouth never leaving my skin. His hands were everywhere, cupping my breasts, skimming my hips, dancing over my waist. “I want you,” he murmured.
“Yes,” I managed, reaching for his belt.
* * *
I lay on my side, Levi’s body wrapped around me from behind. He was inside me. His fingers were between my legs. I felt assaulted by sensation. He was stroking me inside and out, and I was a tight ball of building frenzy. It felt so good that I could hardly make noise. I just gasped again and again, each gasp seeming to push me further and further toward my brink.
His lips were at the back of my neck. He groaned softly.
I felt cradled by him, like he was gently nudging me, like I was a gradually opening flower, a layer of petals falling open each time he dragged his fingers over me, each time he thrust into me.
We were getting closer and closer to the brightly burning center. He was taking me there, and I wanted there so badly.
I moaned.
“You close?” he whispered.
I couldn’t form words. I only gasped again. The pleasure inside me was growing more and more intense. I could feel my whole body begin to tremble in anticipation, and I willed it not to resist his touch, to let him bring me over, the let it, let it, let it—
I made another noise, something almost guttural.
And then it happened. I climaxed in his arms. Bright, searing light seemed to pulse through me. I convulsed and bucked against him, my mouth open in a silent scream of delight.
And then his fingers—his fingers were too much. I needed them off me. I scrabbled to find his hand, to yank it away from my now too-sensitive flesh.
“You okay?”
“Oh yeah,” I panted. “I’m really okay. It’s just it was too much… after…”
; “After?” There was a satisfied purr to his tone. “Did you come?”
“Uh huh,” I breathed.
“Good,” he groaned, moving faster inside me. He pushed me over onto my stomach, still buried deep inside me. He drove himself in and out of me, quickly, and he was so deep now. And my body was still experiencing aftershocks, the last traces of my orgasm leaving me.
But then he stopped moving. He grunted.
And I felt him pulse inside me too. It felt similar, like an echo of my own release, the same mechanism, only turned outward.
I sighed into the pillow.
He kissed my neck, the back of my shoulders. And slowly pulled out of me, rolling off my body.
I made a small sound of displeasure. I missed the way he’d felt inside me. I felt almost… empty now, and I didn’t like it.
He sprang off the bed.
I rolled over so that I could see him. “Where are you going?”
“Condom,” he muttered. And he disappeared out of the room.
I heard the toilet flush, and then he was back, crawling into bed beside me. He eased his arm under my shoulders and drew me against him. He kissed me.
He was warm and solid and lovely. I held onto him, happy to have him close again. I had to admit that I’d been a little bit worried. Sex between Levi and me had been awesome before, but I had been a afraid that it was mostly due to leftover ecstasy in our systems. But this… this had been amazing. Perfect. Transcendent.
He moaned, kissing my forehead. “You have the sweetest, tightest pussy, Molly.”
I stiffened at the word. I couldn’t believe he’d just said it. Out loud. After the way we’d been together. I giggled. “Levi,” I admonished.
“What?” He drew back a little bit.
“You just said…”
“Said what?”
“You made it sound… dirty.”
He laughed. “Well, we were doing some very dirty things there.”
“No, we weren’t.”
“Mmm… where we you? Because I was pretty sure you were just with me, here in this bed, getting very thoroughly fucked.”
I giggled again, helplessly. I couldn’t deny that there was something thrilling about hearing words like that come out of his mouth. But they weren’t words I used. Up until this very moment, I’d been convinced they cheapened the entire experience of sex, made it something a little sordid. And what Levi and I had just done was sweet and good and nice.
“Am I bothering you?” He was grinning.
“It’s only those words…”
“What words?”
“You know…” I hid my face in the pillow, feeling embarrassed.
“Oh.” His voice was darkly teasing. “You mean like pussy?”
I giggled again.
“You don’t like that word?”
I lifted my face. “I don’t know. I didn’t think I did. Somehow, when you’re saying it, it’s not…”
He still sounded amused. “I won’t say it again.”
“No, I didn’t mean…” I scrunched up my nose. “Maybe I kind of liked it when you said it.”
He chuckled. “You’re so innocent, Molly.”
“I am not.”
“Jesus.” He laughed again. “You’re a teenager. I’m having amazingly hot sex with a teenager.”
“I’m not a teenager.” I pushed out of his arms and propped myself up on one elbow. “I mean, I am, but it’s not like that. I’m an adult.”
He reached up and stroked my jaw. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.”
I bit down on my lip. “Do I seem innocent when we’re doing it or something? Am I doing something wrong?”
“No.” He laughed again. “You’re great. Really fucking great.” He pulled me down against him and kissed me again. “I am in awe of you. And your fantastically tight teenage pussy. Now let’s go to sleep.”
I extracted myself from his arms. I rolled over with my back to him.
“Was that bad?”
“Kind of.”
He pressed up against me from behind, his hand gently resting on my upper arm. He kissed my shoulder. “I promise I will never call it that again. From now on, I’ll refer to it as your… tunnel of love.”
I snorted.
He trailed kisses up my shoulder. “Your slip n’ slide to heaven.” He kept kissing me. “Your little peach glove.” His mouth found my neck. “Your sweet, sweet taco of bliss.”
I giggled, shoving him off me. “You idiot.”
He captured both of my hands and pinned them above my head. He eased on top of me and kissed me long and deep. “Seriously, Molly, I won’t say it.”
My face was inches from his. My voice came out barely audible. “It wasn’t that you said pussy.”
“So what was it?”
“The teenage stuff.”
“Oh.” He kissed my nose. “Sorry.”
“You’re not that much older than me.”
“I kind of am,” he said.
“If I was twenty-one and you were twenty-seven, it wouldn’t be that big of a deal.”
“I’m not saying it’s a big deal,” he said.
“You keep bringing it up.”
He let out an embarrassed laugh. “It turns me on.”
“Why?”
He rested his forehead against mine. “I don’t know. Because I’m male?”
“Is that why we’re doing this? Because you want a piece of young ass? Am I like a conquest or something?”
“No.” He rolled away. “No. If I wanted that, trust me, I’ve had enough chances.”
I felt empty again, now that we weren’t touching. I pulled the covers closer. “Maybe I am innocent,” I whispered.
“You’re not. Or you’re about as innocent as you should be at nineteen. I think I’m just corrupting you.” There was a tinge of guilt in his voice.
I fiddled with the covers. “Maybe I kind of like being corrupted.”
He sighed. “Yeah, and maybe I like corrupting you.”
“I never…” I took a deep breath. “I never had an orgasm during sex before. Or in the presence of someone else, for that matter.”
He turned to me. “Seriously?”
I nodded.
“Whoa.” He was quiet for a second. “So, every guy you’ve ever been with has sucked in bed, huh?”
“Well, um, you’re sort of only the second person that I…”
“Whoa,” he said again.
I seized handfuls of the covers and squeezed them. “Maybe I shouldn’t have told you that.”
“No, it’s okay.” His arms went around me again. He kissed my temple. “It’s actually… it’s a nice feeling. It makes me feel even more protective of you.” He held me tight. “I can be better at this,” he whispered in my ear. “You mean a lot to me.”
I fell asleep wrapped up in him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
“Hey,” said Levi’s voice on the other end of my phone. “How was your class?”
“Fine,” I said. I’d torn out of his house that morning, intent on not missing another day of school. I’d missed too much recently, and I didn’t want to get too far behind. I was already hunting down the previous days’ notes from my classmates with a fiery passion.
“What else you got today?”
“Actually, I’m done,” I said. “I only had three classes today.”
“Cool,” he said. “You want to come over?”
“Well, I was going to take a shower.” I hadn’t had a chance to this morning in my mad dash to make it to my morning class.
“Ooh, a shower,” he said. “I now have very pleasant images in my head of your body covered in soap suds.”
I felt embarrassed but pleased.
“Not too covered, of course,” he said, his voice lower. “Mostly uncovered, in fact.”
“Well, I generally do take showers in a state of undress,” I said.
“Yeah?” I could hear his sharp intake of breath on the line. When he spoke aga
in, his voice had taken on a thick quality that made my body tighten. “You know, I have a shower at my apartment.”
“Levi—”
“And I could really stand to take a shower myself. It seems to me that we have an opportunity here to save the environment and not waste water.”
I shut my eyes. The sound of his voice was waking something inside me. Something deep and yearning. “I don’t know.”
“Come take a shower with me, Molly,” he urged. “I won’t take no for an answer.”
* * *
Levi rubbed a towel over my shoulders, sopping up droplets of water. He kissed me.
I grinned up at him stupidly, feeling languid and happy. “So, I didn’t think that would work.”
“What wouldn’t?”
“You know, sex in the shower. I was pretty sure it was impossible.” Duncan and I had tried it once, and it had been sort of disastrous. Our… parts just didn’t seem to line up.
“Well, it’s all about the position,” said Levi. “There are a lot of things you can’t do in the shower, but there are also a lot of things that you can. And I plan on showing you each and every one of them.”
I kissed him again. “I have to admit it’s not awful that you are so old and experienced.”
He pulled away, feigning offense. “Hey. I’m not old.”
“You are,” I said mock-seriously, pulling the towel away from him and wrapping it around my body. “You’re practically ancient. Geriatric, really.”
He laughed. “Geriatric? Seriously? Take that back, or I’m going to whip that towel off of you and show you how geriatric I am.”
I giggled, dancing out of his grasp.
He grabbed me anyway, tugging me tight against him and kissing me again. “I think you better go get my walker.”
I ran my fingers over his face, tracing the outline of his finely-drawn features. He was a very nice-looking guy. “And your Ensure.”
He groaned. “You’re killing me.”
I placed my palms on his chest. It was still a little wet. It glistened in the lights in the bathroom. “Seriously. I like that you have skills.”
He grinned. “I’m glad you think so.”
I focused on his chest. “But, um, can I ask you a question?”
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