First of all it was the constant pain of my injuries that kept me from awake and then it was my nightmares. Every time my body eventually drifts off to sleep I’m jolted awake by the images of them together. I still can’t believe she’s really gone, that she’s really left me. She’s left me for him.
Of course I know it won’t last, I won’t let it. I’ll do everything in my power to destroy them and that’s why I need Tammy to speak to the girl as soon as possible. I’ve spent hours thinking it all over, analysing and evaluating it from every angle and this is the only way. I have no idea how else I can get her back or how else I can annihilate the fucker who stole her from me. He stole my daughter, the one and only thing I love in the whole world. I have to find her and when I do I plan on taking her far, far away from here. Somewhere no one can find us; somewhere no one will even think to look for us.
I still can’t believe she’s been deceiving me for all these months. She lied, tricked and fooled me into thinking she was my perfect green eyed angel, she conned me and even though I’ll never admit this to her, I’m impressed. I now see she has a part of me in her, she has the power to persuade and convince people into believing what she wants them to and as much as I despise that she used this against me, I’m dazzled by her capability.
I started to suspect her behaviour a few weeks ago. I could see something had changed in her but I couldn’t put my finger on exactly what it was. I needed to make sure my instincts were right and decided to watch her closely, patiently waiting for her to slip up and make a mistake. It was when I found out she was prepared to lie to me to protect her mother that I knew she’d betrayed me. If she could deceive me over something like that, what else was she lying about?
When I caught them together in the book store I knew something was going on between them. I even gave her the chance to come clean and confess everything to me but she refused. Watching my innocent little girl deliberately lie caused me so much pain. I felt like an idiot for believing in her, for all of the trust and devotion I’d bestowed upon her when she had been undeserving of it the entire time.
I even considered going to the police after that boyfriend of hers beat me to a pulp in my own house. However, I knew having him arrested for GBH would only keep them apart for so long, the fury I saw in his eyes that night unnerved me. I know I have to bide my time and play the long game if I want to get her back, if I ever want to see her again I must be forbearing and wait for the right moment to strike.
I went straight to the hospital with a broken nose that night. They gave me an anaesthetic whilst the doctor realigned the nasal bones and I also needed stitches, he had busted up my nose so bad. For days I stayed at home, in such a state I couldn’t even leave the house. What astonished me the most was the gleam in his eyes, I could tell he really wanted to kill me. I saw it in his eyes, he didn’t want to stop. I don’t think he would have done if Ellen hadn’t come home when she did.
I’ve experienced the same rage as him, I’ve felt the forceful adrenaline coursing through my veins and that’s how I able to understand his hatred for me. I recognised a part of myself in him, I’d kill for Bethany I’d destroy any man who tries to take her from me and that’s why I’m going to destroy him.
I even went to the damn funeral, hoping I’d catch a glimpse of my daughter. I couldn’t stand the old bitch and was glad she was dead but I still went, desperate for Bethany to make an appearance. She thought the world of her gran and I was sure she’d come to pay her respects. I was wrong, I guess I don’t know her as well as I thought.
I seek solace in the thought that she’ll soon be back with me where she belongs. We’ll have to leave this place and run, no one can know where we are or they’ll try to take her away from me again. I considered going away for a few weeks so I could clear my head and come up with a plan to win Bethany back, only deciding against it when I figured out the one place I need to be is at home, surrounded by my memories of her and her things.
If Tammy doesn’t come through for me with this, I’ll just have to find another way. We’ve known each other for twenty-three years; she should know me well enough by now to know she shouldn’t cross me. Our relationship has been a secret for as long as I’ve been married to Ellen and I intend to keep it that way. For years she’s been nagging me to go away with her, demanding vacations and hotel holidays. I’ve always told her it’s impossible and only changed my mind when I got to Ted.
He’s become a good friend of mine and was thoughtful enough to offer me his luxurious caravan to stay in with Bethany. He’s been a good friend to me these last couple of months and he’s the only one I’ve chosen to confide in about my affair with Tammy. We spend most of our time crawling around the local bars and hotels, eating out and enjoying the company of the various women he’s been kind enough to introduce me to. That’s where I’ve been the last few weeks, I needed time to cool off and recharge my batteries. The only reason I came home is for Bethany, I missed her and needed to be close to her again. I told Ellen I was away on business; I knew she wouldn’t ask any questions. I’ve trained her well and she knows when to keep quiet.
The days without her all blur into one and I spend all of my time in complete agony, torturing myself over how I can get her back. I only have one hope and one chance to make this right, my only hope is Tammy, if she doesn’t get this right… I’ll be back to square one.
It’s late at night when I finally get the phone call I’ve been waiting for. Ellen has already gone up to bed and I’m downstairs sitting in the dark, a bottle of whiskey in my hand, the only thing that helps ease the pain these days.
“Tammy, have you told her?” I ask, speaking quietly down the phone.
“I’ve done it, she knows.”
I breathe a huge sigh of relief. Thank God. Thank God she’s done it.
“What did she say? Will she go along with it?”
“You haven’t even told me what you want her to do. I’m completely in the dark here, Arthur. She was shocked to say the least and a little angry with me for keeping it from her all these years. She’s been struggling lately and finding things difficult, it wasn’t the best time for me to drop a huge bombshell on her.”
I roll my eyes, trying to keep the irritation out of my voice. I don’t give a shit about how the girl feels; she’s simply a means to an end. Of course I can’t let Tammy know this; if I want my plan to work she has to believe that I have the girl’s best interests at heart.
My affair with Tammy has been going on forever. Ellen doesn’t know about it and she never will, even if she did find out there’s nothing she could do about it. When I first met Tammy she was beneath me in every single way, she’s several years younger than me and naively chose to believe every word I said. I was already married to Ellen when I first met her and couldn’t resist her pretty looks and dumb blonde persona. It was never meant to be anything serious, I was already bored with the timid little mouse I’d married and wanted to have some fun. Tammy fell head over heels in love with me and actually believed me when I told her I was just waiting for the right time to leave my wife. Bethany hadn’t been born yet and Tammy couldn’t understand what was holding me back, why I didn’t just divorce my wife so we could be together.
I’d only been seeing her a few months when she told me she was pregnant; I didn’t believe it was mine at first because Tammy had a partner as well. She swore to me it was my baby and that she hadn’t slept with the idiot she was engaged to for months. I was horrified when she told me she wanted to keep the baby, she was nothing more than a hobby to me and there was no way I was going to throw everything away for her and a little brat I didn’t even want.
I was more than ready to put end to the whole thing, I tried to break it off with her several times but she threatened to tell Ellen everything. I didn’t really care if she told her or not, the only thing that made me hesitate was when Tammy threatened to go to the police. She new I’d have a prior conviction, a sexual assault charge from when I was a
teenager. There wasn’t enough evidence to convict me at the time but it was still on my records. If Tammy went to the police and told them I’d assaulted her I’d have been looking at a custodial sentence. The bitch had me over a barrel and I was trapped. She was obsessed with the idea of me leaving Ellen for her and I had to go along with it during her pregnancy to keep her quiet.
She managed to convince the fool she was with that it was his baby and seemed content with our Friday night arrangement. It’s the only night a week I permit myself to see her and over the years it seems to have been enough to keep her happy. She had the baby but I was adamant I wanted nothing to do with it; I swore to her I would end things between us if she ever tried to introduce me to the child. She didn’t like it but had to agree to my demands.
When the girl was five years old I insisted on getting a paternity test done on her, of course it came back that she was mine and I was absolutely furious with myself for getting lumbered with a tart and her kid. I’d been hoping the DNA test would reveal Tammy had been lying to me. I had a three year old Bethany by this time and didn’t want or need another daughter in my life other than her.
I’ve had no interest in the girl I fathered until now. Ellen and I had Bethany when Tammy’s girl was two years old and I absolutely doted on her from the moment she was born. I always loved that little girl, she was my whole world and she always has been. I named Bethany after my mother who I adore and knew I never wanted any other children after her. She was everything I’d ever wanted, my beautiful brown haired little angel.
I down the remainder of my whiskey after my phone call with Tammy. I’ve arranged to meet the girl on Friday night. I hope she won’t turn out to be as infuriating as her mother; I need one thing from her and one thing only. I have no intention of building a relationship with her. She might have been born first but in my eyes she’ll always be second best, she’s the least of my priorities and I’m going to make sure she knows it.
I pace back and forth outside Starbucks, its Friday night and I’m anxiously waiting for Tammy to arrive with the girl. This has to work, it just has to. If it doesn’t I have no idea what I’m going to do. I’ve got the crumpled photo of Bethany in my back pocket, reminding me of the purpose for all this. She’s the only reason I’m here.
“Arthur?”
I turn abruptly and come face to face with Tammy, she’s alone and this fact alone is enough to provoke my anger. If she’s messing me around I’ll make sure she regrets it.
“What took you so long?” I snap.
“I got here as soon as I could…”
“Where’s the girl?” I demand, my eyes roaming through the busy crowd around us. I don’t know who I’m searching for, I have no idea what she looks like; I’ve never even seen a single photo of her.
“Arthur, what happened to your face?” She gasps, taking a step closer towards me.
I thought my bruises were looking a little better but obviously they don’t. She hasn’t seen me since it happened and is clearly horrified by my injuries. I’ve stayed at home for the past week, only leaving the house for the funeral when I thought Bethany might be there.
“I’m fine, stop fussing!” I shout, batting away the hand which was reaching for face.
“Who did this to you?” She asks, ignoring the warning I gave her.
“I told you to drop it! Where is she, Tammy? She better be on her way.”
“Calm down, she’s on her way. You have to understand her hesitancy, Arthur. She was extremely reluctant to come here today and meet you. It took a lot of persuasion on my part to convince her to come.”
I murmur a response; I really don’t care about her daughter’s trepidation. I would have never agreed to this if I had any other choice.
“Shall we go in and sit down?” She offers, motioning towards the coffee shop.
I nod my head towards the small sofa by the window and leave Tammy to go and order the drinks. There’s a small table and an armchair opposite the sofa and I sigh as I take my seat, this is the last place on earth I want to be right now. I suppose I should be thankful that this meeting is taking place now. It could have taken me months to convince Tammy to arrange this and time is something I don’t have a lot of. I need to set the wheels in motion if I want my plan to work.
I glance over at the door every time it opens, waiting for a twenty-two year old girl to come in by herself. I grab a newspaper which was left on the table and take a look through it, unable to focus on anything except Bethany. I can feel her photo burning a hole right through my pocket and it takes all of my strength and willpower to keep myself from looking at it.
The sound of someone clearing their throat forces me to look up and I finally come face to face with the daughter I’ve never known. I don’t bother to stand up, there’s no need for me to greet her and I want her to know from the start that she means nothing to me. I could walk past this girl on the street and I would never have known she was my daughter. The only similarity we share is our piercing blue eyes and that’s the only thing we have in common.
“So, this is awkward.” She speaks with confidence as she takes the seat opposite.
I’m already trying to read her character, I want to find out what her motive is for meeting me today and what it will take for me to convince her to do exactly what I want. She stares back at me, refusing to break eye contact and I can already see how fearless and bold she is. She’s the type of girl who won’t step away from a challenge and that’s another thing I admire. It’s hard to explain but there’s something about her mannerisms and cold facial expressions that makes me believe she’s the perfect type of girl for what I want her to do.
“Your mum is already in the queue; I don’t know if she knows what you want to drink?” I tell her, deciding to play nice until I get to know what motivates this girl.
“I’m good, I don’t want anything.” She replies coolly.
“How did you know who I was when you walked in?” I ask, remembering how she came straight over towards me.
“Mum showed me a picture of you when she told me the truth, when she told me you were my father.” She narrows her eyes at me, glaring angrily.
I try to hide my disgust when she called me her father. I hope she realised I have no interest in becoming her parent. I’m here for one reason and one reason only. Bethany.
“Well, I appreciate you coming here today; you must be wondering why I asked to meet you after all of this time…” I pause when I realise I don’t even know her name; I raise my eyebrows at her, waiting for her to offer it to me.
“My name is Sarah.” She says bitterly, fixing those spiteful eyes on my own.
“I’m sorry, I should have known that.” I lie, knowing she expected me to apologise.
“What’s this all about anyway? What do you want from me?”
Her penetrating eyes burn a hole right through me, she has long blonde hair and looks absolutely nothing like Bethany. As I continue to observe her I start to notice the arrogance and conceit that surrounds her permeates her whole demeanour. She’s absolutely perfect for what I have in mind, she’s beautiful and that’s also a bonus.
“I’m glad you’ve got straight to the point. The fact of the matter is I haven’t been a part of your life for twenty-two years and I really don’t see why anything should change between us now. You don’t know me and I don’t expect you want to after all this time.”
“Go on.” She encourages me to continue.
“I don’t know if your mum told you this or not but I have a daughter. She’s a couple of years younger than you and she’s just left home. She’s abandoned her whole life and forgotten about the people who love her so she could run away with some boy. I want her back; I want her back with me where she belongs.”
“That’s a fascinating story, it really is. The only problem… I really don’t care.”
She smiles at me sweetly and I can’t help but laugh, she reminds me of a younger version of myself. She’s still just a bab
y but there’s already so much malice and contempt for the feelings of others. She’s definitely my daughter.
“Believe me, what I have to offer you will be worth your while.”
“Go on then, spit it out. Don’t keep me in suspense.”
“The boy she’s with is no good; I want him out of her life. I want to ruin him like he ruined me. He doesn’t know it yet but I’m going to destroy him.”
“He’s the one who did that to you then?” She doesn’t even try to conceal her smirk, motioning towards the bruises on my face and my broken nose.
“He did and he’s going to pay for it.” I say decidedly, swallowing down the hatred I feel for the piece of shit who stole my daughter from me.
“I still don’t get what any of this has to do with me.” She says, inspecting her fingernails in boredom.
“I want you to be the one who comes between them.” I tell her.
Her mouth falls open in surprise, she certainly wasn’t expecting that.
“Why the hell would I do that? I don’t care about this girl or the guy who’s screwing her. She has nothing to do with me. Why don’t you go and find some other mug to do your dirty work for you?”
She starts to rise from her seat but I stop her by grabbing hold of her wrist firmly. She tries to yank her arm from my grasp but I hold on, determined I’ll make her do as I say.
“You’re telling me you’re willing to turn down an awful lot of money just so you don’t have to involve yourself with a stranger and her boyfriend?”
She pauses, the mention of money finally capturing her attention.
“How much money are we talking?” She asks, slowly sitting back down in her seat.
“As much as it will take, I don’t care what it costs me. All I need you to do is come between them. He’s young and what you might call handsome; his commitment to Bethany won’t last for long, not if you enter the picture. You’re a beautiful young woman; any man would find it difficult to turn you down. He’s bound to cheat on her eventually, no matter how honourable his intentions are”
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