Anything for Her

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by Janice Kay Johnson


  You planning to stand out here for maybe an hour or two?

  He muffled a groan and reached for the damn doorknob. It would be just his luck if there were half a dozen women in there, all of whom would turn and stare at him when he walked in.

  The bell tinkled and silence enveloped him.

  “Hello, I’ll be with you in a moment,” Allie called from out of sight, and he was thrown back to that first day.

  He remembered his astonishment at the multitude of fabrics, the colors, patterns, the femininity of his surroundings. But determination had carried him forward, through the alien landscape, until he’d found...Allie.

  Determination set his feet on the same path this time, although his goal had changed. He reached the back room, unlike that first time not even taking in the quilt stretched in the frame.

  Allie lifted her head, shock widening her eyes. The black leather thimble she was using dropped to the quilt top and she pushed back her chair with a jerk and rose to her feet.

  “Nolan?” Her voice squeaked.

  He held up the bags, as if they were answer enough. His hungry eyes took her in. Her hair was up in that ballerina-do, exposing the pure line of her neck and throat. She wore one of her skirts that draped artfully, and a formfitting knit top with three-quarter sleeves. She was bright and beautiful, graceful and so precious to him he ached.

  “I never thought,” she whispered.

  His mouth crooked up. “That I wouldn’t take no as an answer even when you said it loud and clear?”

  “Of course that’s not what I meant.”

  He set down the bags of food. His fingers flexed. It took an effort of will to make them loosen.

  “I told you I love you.” That came out as rough as crude granite.

  Allie took a step closer to him, her glorious eyes raised to him. “Nolan, I was going to come and see you. To tell you...”

  He ignored her. He had to get this out. “I’m here to say that if they decide to move you, Sean and I want to go, too. With you,” he added, to be absolutely sure she understood. “We’re okay with new names and the whole deal.”

  For the longest time she didn’t move, not even to blink or breathe. Nolan tried not to twitch under that stunned stare.

  “With me?”

  “With you,” he repeated. He cleared his throat. “If you’ll have us.”

  She burst into tears.

  * * *

  OH, HELL. Was her reaction good news for him or bad? Either way, he took her into his arms, tucked her head under his chin and held her tight.

  “It’s okay.” He squeezed his eyes shut and laid a cheek against her hair. “God. You don’t have to cry. If you don’t want us, just say so. I’ll go away. I’m not going to become a stalker.”

  She grabbed handfuls of his shirt near his spine. He felt the tension in her fingers.

  Okay, she was holding on, too. His hopes rose.

  He murmured meaningless stuff until her shoulders quit shaking so hard and her body began to relax against his. Then he took a deep breath.

  “I wasn’t being fair,” he said. “I was doing what everyone else always has, demanding you make a choice and assuming you’d choose me. I was an ass. But it’s not going to be that way this time. All you have to do is tell me how much to pack and when we’re going. We’ll be ready.”

  Allie wiped her face on him. Tears and snot both, he thought, his tenderness tinged with amusement. Be honest, tinged with fear, too. Because she might be working her way up to saying, Thanks, but no thanks. And then he’d have to keep his word, turn and walk out of here in the full knowledge he’d never in this lifetime set eyes on her again.

  I don’t know if I can do that.

  I promised.

  Apprehension made him feel big, clumsy, dumb. He had a flicker of seeing himself as the stone man he’d carved, beyond any feelings. Is that what would happen to him if Allie turned him away?

  She let go of his shirt, one finger at a time. He wanted her to keep clutching tight. If the answer is no, don’t say it yet. Let me hope for a little longer.

  Stupid.

  She struggled a little in his embrace, and he reluctantly loosened it so she could ease back enough to look up at him. The tears were smeared but still there on her cheeks. Damp tendrils of dark hair stuck to her forehead and temple. Her usually elegant nose was Rudolph-red. Her eyes were pink, puffy...and held an expression he could only interpret as awe. A smile trembled on her lips.

  “I never even thought of asking if you’d go with me.” The smile wobbled right out of existence. “I never dreamed anyone would. You would be giving up so much.”

  “Not as much as I’d be giving up if I let you go,” he managed to say gruffly.

  “And Sean is really, truly willing, too?”

  “Yeah.” He eyed her warily. “I broke my word to you. I had to tell him everything.”

  “That’s okay. I trust him.”

  She kept searching his face, her expression so astonished and wondering. He knew that no matter whether she wanted him or not, the gift he’d offered meant more to her than even he’d imagined.

  But, shit, he wished she’d say something. When she didn’t, he couldn’t take it another minute.

  “So.” He cleared his throat. “Is this a yes?”

  “No,” she said softly, “this is a thank-you.”

  He backed up a step, his muscles coiling painfully. “Because you’re still mad at me? Or because you’ve realized you don’t love me enough to commit to the long haul?”

  “What?” Crinkles formed on her high, curved forehead. “No! What are you talking about?”

  He unclenched his jaw. “Then what did you mean?”

  “I meant thank you but I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here.” Her gaze was suddenly shy. “If you want me.”

  Shaking his head, Nolan tried to figure out what she was saying. “You mean, your mother has gotten word they won’t be moving her?”

  “No. She doesn’t know. What I’m trying to tell you is that I was an idiot. I love you. I’m staying even if Mom is relocated. I was going to come to tell you as soon as I closed up shop. I need you to know how sorry I am for hurting you the way I did. I will never leave you.”

  He had to take a moment to let it sink in. She loved him. She wasn’t leaving. She’d chosen him. The tsunami of emotions was almost painful. She loved him. She’d forgiven him. She...

  Nolan let out a whoop, grabbed her and swung her in a circle. Laughing, Allie clutched his shoulders. Her nose was still pink, her face still blotchy, but with that smile, she was also lit with all the delicate beauty and promise of sunrise over the mountains. He slowed, came to a stop and let her slide down his body.

  “God, I love you.”

  Her hands left his shoulders to cup his face. “I love you.”

  “I meant it, you know.”

  “That you love me?” She looked perplexed.

  “That Sean and I are willing to go.” Nolan needed her to understand this. “I’m more honored than I can say that you chose me, but I don’t want you to suffer any more losses in your life.

  “Some of what I said to you before was crap. Sure, most of us let go of our parents—but not all the way, like I was demanding of you. I understand why your mother is so important to you. Talk to her before you make up your mind, Allie. My offer is sincerely meant. Say the word and Sean and I will start packing.”

  She shook her head, but he saw a new shimmer in her eyes. “No. I love my store, and quilting, and being Allie Wright. Thanks to you, I can be Allie, with no regrets.”

  He looked into her eyes and saw that she meant it, heart and soul. The tangle inside him was still painful but also so sweet. Having everything you’d ever wanted handed to you was an astonishing experience.

  “Does that mean you’re not going to take my name?” Lightening the moment seemed like a good idea.

  Allie’s smile brightened. “Actually, I would love to take your name. I’m not al
l that attached to the name Wright, you know. You promised that I could keep Radek forever. I like that idea.”

  “Yeah.” His arms contracted around her. “Forever sounds good to me.”

  “Me, too.” She lifted her face for a kiss.

  Kissing her was a damn good idea, too. He kept right on doing it long after hearing a stupid little bell ring somewhere.

  One month later

  “I HAVE THIS horrible feeling we’ve forgotten something important. Rushing is never a good idea.” Mom paced almost to Nolan’s dining room, then back across the kitchen. She frowned. “Flowers.”

  “Done, Mom.” Knowing perfectly well why her mother was so nervous, so lacking in her usual confidence, Allie could be patient.

  “Your dress is perfect.”

  Allie smiled at her. “So is yours.”

  “I can’t believe tomorrow is your wedding day.”

  Allie could. She’d been ready from the moment she told Nolan that she was staying with him no matter what happened with Mom.

  Their first thought was to get married immediately in a civil ceremony so Allie’s mother could be there. But when it became apparent that she wouldn’t be relocated, after all, they had decided to arrange a somewhat more traditional wedding.

  The intervening month had seemed to drag on forever as far as Allie was concerned. Nolan had been even more impatient. Because of Sean, neither of them was comfortable with her moving into his house before they were a married couple, which meant not seeing each other nearly as often as they wanted.

  And now here they were, less than a week before Christmas, and tomorrow was her wedding day.

  But at the moment, it wasn’t her wedding that had Allie and her mother both fidgety and hopeful.

  They were waiting to hear the sound of Nolan’s truck turning into the driveway.

  Feet thundered down the stairs from the second floor. Claws clattered on the hardwood floor, and Cassie galloped ahead of Sean into the kitchen, her tail and butt swinging with pleasure at finding two of her favorite people there. Allie’s mother had become very fond of Cassie, and was even talking about adopting a dog herself.

  “Something smaller,” she had said. “You know how tiny my yard is. But I think I’d enjoy the company.”

  Allie had privately smiled and suspected Mom would come home from the shelter with a Great Dane mix or something equally inappropriate. Sort of like Lady the beagle, with her wandering gene. How many times had Mom thrown up her hands and exclaimed, “We should find her a home in the country!” just before sneaking a treat under the table.

  “How come he isn’t back yet?” Sean complained.

  “He might have hit heavy traffic,” Allie said. “Or the flight could have been delayed.”

  “I’m going to look stupid in a suit and tie.”

  Allie laughed, went to him and rose on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “You’re going to look handsome, and you know it.”

  His cheeks reddened. “At least no one I know will see me,” he said gruffly.

  “You know us. And now your aunt Anna and your grandparents.”

  Nolan’s parents and sister had arrived the day before but had decided to sightsee and have dinner out this evening. Allie thought they were being polite, not wanting to intrude on this reunion. They planned to return before bedtime.

  Jed’s wife was pregnant again and vilely nauseated, and he’d felt too guilty to either drag her onto an airplane or leave her. Nolan had laughed and said, “That’s an excuse I can accept.” His parents were going home to Chicago for Christmas; Anna was staying to celebrate the holiday with Nolan and his new family.

  Now Sean scowled. “They’re not really my grandparents.”

  Allie smiled at him. “They will be.” She and Nolan were going to officially adopt him after the first of the year. They had given him the choice of keeping his last name if he wanted, but he’d decided to become a Radek, too.

  “Yeah.” He shuffled his feet. “I guess so. It’ll be weird.”

  “Who are you calling weird?” Allie’s mom said in mock offense.

  He looked at her in alarm. “I wasn’t... I mean, I know you. They’re, like, strangers.”

  “Grandma,” she prompted him.

  His blush deepened. But then, suddenly, he flashed her a wicked grin. “Grandma. Shouldn’t you be sitting down? At your age and all?”

  “Brat.”

  They both laughed. Allie watched their interplay with delight. Life couldn’t always be this good, could it?

  No. Jason might have changed his mind and not come. Maybe that’s what had taken Nolan so long. He’d scoured the airport and had Jason paged and maybe finally discovered he had a voice mail message from him...

  She heaved a sigh. Of course Nolan would have called to tell them. She knew that. But sooner or later, something lousy would happen. Sean would rebel and decide these new parents weren’t so cool after all. Or she and Nolan would have a child with a birth defect or... Oh, who knew.

  Yes, but I’ll have him.

  His steadiness would be her anchor, no matter what happened.

  Sean cocked his head. “Hey, isn’t that his truck?”

  “Oh, dear God.” Allie’s mother pressed one hand to her breast and the other to her mouth.

  Allie’s pulse leaped and she listened hard. The deep rumble of Nolan’s diesel engine was unmistakable. It always reminded her of his voice. “It’s them,” she said, excited and terrified all at the same time.

  Dumb.

  Sean and Cassie bounded enthusiastically for the front door. Allie and her mother stared at each other for a stricken moment before following more slowly.

  “I can’t believe this is happening,” Mom murmured.

  “Me, either.”

  Mom’s “handler” had informed them that all the activity stirring the alarm could be traced directly to the P.I. Nolan hired. There wasn’t the slightest indication of any other interest. Nor was there any indication that the Nelson identity had been penetrated. The U.S. Marshals Service didn’t see why Jason couldn’t resume cautious contact with his mother and sister, and Allie’s dad with her. Jason had flown out to attend the wedding and stay for Christmas; Nolan and Allie had promised to visit her father sometime this spring.

  Hearing her dad’s and Jason’s voices on the phone had seemed wondrous, but also...unreal, she realized now. She was having trouble believing she would be seeing her brother in person as soon as she stepped out onto the front porch.

  Ahead of her, Mom hesitated for the longest moment before following Sean out the door. She had to be even more blown away, Allie realized. Mom had believed she’d never see her son again, and now here he was.

  Taking a deep breath, Allie joined her mother. Sean was already loping down the porch steps to meet Nolan, who was climbing out of the pickup. The passenger side door opened, and a man got out. Allie stared, thinking, Wait a minute—that’s not Jason.

  But it was, she saw the minute he started walking toward them, at first slowly and then faster and faster until he’d broken into a jog. Allie’s mother made a strange sound.

  He’d been a boy the last time they saw him, only nineteen. He was thirty now, a man. His thin body had filled out.

  Eyes filling with tears, Allie started down the steps. They met halfway. He squeezed her in a huge hug that lifted her off her feet.

  “Chloe the dancing girl,” he said roughly into her hair.

  “Jacob. Oh, my God.”

  He gently lowered her, and she felt the moment he looked past her. “Mom,” he said in a low, shaken voice. He set Allie aside and climbed the last two steps slowly, never looking away from his mother.

  Allie had never seen anything like that expression on their mother’s face. It was as if her every dream had come true. When Jason enveloped Mom in a hug, all Allie could see was his back, broader and stronger than she remembered it being.

  Helplessly, she turned to Nolan, who was coming up the steps to her. He was smiling crooked
ly.

  “Sorry we’re late.”

  Unable to speak, she shook her head.

  “You should see your face.”

  Maybe her expression wasn’t that different from her mom’s, she thought. When Nolan reached a hand to her, she took it.

  “You know, if you hadn’t had me investigated, none of this ever would have happened.”

  “You can’t know that.”

  “I do. It was like...like shaking a bottle. All the bad stuff rose from the bottom.”

  He laughed, but not altogether happily. “I wish I could say that’s what I meant to do, Allie. But we both know better.”

  She heard the sound of her mother weeping. When she looked, she saw that neither Jason nor Mom had moved. He held her, his head bent over hers. Allie’s grip on Nolan’s big hand tightened.

  “I love you.” The words trembled with her intensity.

  “And I love you, Allie the dancing girl,” he said, very deliberately, never looking away from her.

  “Not the dancing girl anymore.”

  His smile was slow but sure, like Nolan himself. “Yeah, you are. Every step you take, every movement, is part of a dance. I figure, clumsy as I am, I got real lucky to be picked as your partner.”

  Although her eyes were stinging, she was smiling, too. “In dance, the male role is to lift the female dancer. He helps her fly. That’s what you do for me, Nolan. And I always feel safe with you.”

  He climbed another step so he could wrap his arms around her. “Funny thing is, sometimes lately I think you’ve taken me flying with you.” He kissed her with tenderness more than passion. “Are you happy, Allie?”

  Her smile bloomed until she didn’t think it could get any bigger.

  Past Nolan, Sean waited at the foot of the stairs, his hand on Cassie’s head. Both gazed anxiously upward. There was Nolan, his eyes so blue and intent on her. And when Allie turned, she saw that her brother had his arm around their mother and they’d turned. Mom was laughing through her tears. And Jason...the look in his eyes could have broken Allie’s heart, if it wasn’t also so amazing.

  “I didn’t know it was possible to be so happy,” she told Nolan. She kissed his cheek and then called to Sean, “Come up here and meet my brother.”

 

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