by Dara Nelson
Chapter Five
We woke, again, at dawn this time. The jungle was alive with sounds and the smell of food floated into the hut. I was instantly aware that I didn’t eat yesterday. “I’m starving,” I said.
“So am I,” he grinned, leering at me.
My hands pressed into his cold chest as I tried to push him back (yeah, like THAT was going to happen). “Seriously? Hold up. I need food to keep up MY strength, especially if you want more of what we had last night,” I said.
He stuck out his bottom lip, pouting but his eyes were smiling, “Oh, I most definitely want more, so I suppose I should let you eat,” he groaned.
I smiled, grabbed his (non-scarred) hand and pulled him out the door. We walked over to the group of villagers and they handed me some goat’s milk, a tortilla and a scoopful of stew that I really wasn’t sure I wanted to know what was in it… but I was so hungry it was delicious. I finished eating and the boat-driver stood up.
“That must be our cue that it’s time to leave,” he said. The women brought me a bag that I saw had my old clothes and shoes in it and we turned and walked hand-in-hand down the path and back to the river. The boat ride back was uneventful and very relaxing. I decided to ask a few more questions.
“Do these scars have something to do with changing me?” I said.
He looked at his hand. “Yes they do, but I’m still not exactly sure how yet. But I’m guessing these are the scars that the priest told me about. The scarsthat we sprinkle the powder on,” he said.
“That was my thought too. Okay, next subject: Have any of your friends been… ummmm… intimate with humans? What I’m getting at is… is… well… am I an exception or am I normal? With how I’m reacting, or overreacting, to sex with you. I mean… are all vampires like you or is it just you? Do all humans freak out like I am or is it just me?” I said. Matt’s left eyebrow went up as he smiled at me and I blushed and buried my head in my hands. “God, I’m so embarrassed,” I groaned.
Matt shifted in the boat slightly and scooted down right behind me, wrapping his arms tightly around me. “Don’t be embarrassed, Sarah. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are completely normal… no, scratch that. You are better than normal. You are an amazingly loving and giving person. But what’s truly amazing is how much that comes across…in the bedroom. I’ve never… ummm… been with anyone like you. So I can’t really answer your question. I mean, I’ve heard people say that humans react extremely… positively… when they’re with a vampire. But I’ve never had such a hard time controlling myself around someone before you. It’s taking every ounce of self-control that I have to keep me from making love to you all day and night long,” he said.
I was completely amazed. “You’re having a hard time controlling yourself?” I whispered. He nodded and kissed the back of my neck, sending a chill down my spine.
“Definitely,” he said. Well, that made me feel a little better. I leaned my head onto his chest. We were nearing the dock. SuddenlyMatt sat up. He was straight and tense as he began searching the shore.
“What is it?” I whispered, not exactly sure that I wanted to know.
“Carlos is here. There have been some… developments,” he said. I could hear the strain in his voice.
“The Enforcers have rejoined,” Carlos said when we got to the car he had rented. “They’ve decided to return to your known friends and… ahh… step up the interrogation techniques.”
The concern was clear on Matt’s face. “Don’t fight them Carlos,” he said, “tell them what they want to know. It will still take them some time to pick up our trail. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
Carlos grinned as he climbed into the driver’s seat of the car, “Ahh come on, let me have SOME fun,” he said as he grinned and winked at me. Matt just rolled his eyes and shook his head.
“Are you afraid of anything, Carlos?” I asked.
“Only commitment,” he laughed.
“Because he’s an idiot,” Matt muttered, then he sighed. “You should be afraid of the Enforcers, Carlos.”
“Why?” Carlos asked. “They’re just the Elders’errand boys. Matt, you know the horrible crap I went through before I met you. With Jonas. Going through that changed me. After that I decided that life was too precious to not have fun, to not find good in everything, to not live life to its fullest.”
I looked at Matt, wanting to ask what had happened to Carlos, but he whispered, “Later.”
Matthew climbed into the back seat with me, pulling me close to him. “Ummm, where are we going now?” I asked.
“The airport. I already grabbed your stuff from the hotel,” Carlos said, as he turned and tossed two warm pints of blood onto Matthew’s lap. Matthew went to hand them back.
“Carlos, please, not now,” he said. But I knew he needed it, he had to, so I stopped him by placing my hand on his.
“Matt, it’s fine,” I said and I smiled.
“Yeah, dude, you need to keep your strength up. Otherwise that woman you’ve got is going to wear you out,” Carlos said, grinningfrom the front seat. I turned to look out the window, knowing Mattwas still uncomfortable with me seeing this. Within seconds his hand was under my chin, turning my face back to look at him, the empty pints on the seat next to him. He started kissing me then and I lost all sense of time.
“Uh, break it up guys, we’re here,” Carlos said. How did we get to the airport so fast? It had to be an hour from where we started. I blinked and tried to clear my head as I climbed out of the car. I smiled at Matt. “So, where are we headed now?” I asked. Carlos pulled our bags out of the trunk.
“To Africa, specifically Nigeria,” Matt said.
An hour later, after saying our goodbyes to Carlos (laughing as he hugged me and said, “Come on, Sarah. Give us a kiss so you don’t miss me too much. I promise to keep my tongue in my mouth.”) I was relaxing back into the fully reclined, leather first class (of course, I thought sarcastically) seat. Matt kept teasing me during the long sixteen hour flight since I had to down his drinks as well as mine, and pick at his food as well as mine so we didn’t draw unnecessary attention from the flight attendants. All that eating and drinking meant numerous trips to the bathroom.
“I really do not miss that,” he said when I returned from yet another bathroom break. I pulled the armrest up and laid my head in his lap.
“I don’t think I will either,” I mumbled as I quickly started to drift off to sleep with Matt’s hand lightly caressing through my hair. A while later we were safely tucked away in a Nigerian hotel room. We had just gotten there and I was trying really hard to control myself, but all I wanted to do was tear his clothes off and tackle him… that seemed to be all I could ever think about now. I was biting my lip and trying not to look at him, which, of course, he noticed.
“Sarah, honey, is something wrong?” he said as he took a step toward me.
“Stop,” I whispered, which he did instantly. Then he waited.
“I just… I just… damn it Matt. I don’t want you to get sick of me, but I can’t control myself around you. All I can think about is you, naked, on that bed, right now.”
He grinned at me. “Sarah, I could never get sick of you,” he said as he began peeling off his clothes. He lay down on the bed and held his arms out to me… that was all the invitation I needed.
A while later, he sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands, clearly shaken up by what had just happened (truth be told, so was I but now wasn’t the time to show it). I leaned over him, wrapped my arms around him, kissed his cheek, and said “It’s okay sweetheart.”
“Oh, come on, Sarah. It is not okay. It’s about as far from okay as we can get,” he said. “I don’t know why that just happened. I don’t know how it happened. And that probably scares me more than the fact that it did happen.”
I glanced down at my hand, which was still white, but was beginning to tingle slightly as the blood began to return. I was still a little light-headed. I rubb
ed my finger over the tiny pin-prick on the end of my thumb and thought about what had happened. We had been taking advantage of our free afternoon (his friend Omoruyi wouldn’t be picking him up until ten o’clock tonight to take him to see his great-grandfather, Olatunde, a village elder). I tried to make sense of it: While in a moment of incredible passion (although they all seemed to be incredible with him) I had innocently slid my thumb across his lips, parted them and then slid it in his mouth and left it there. At the moment he climaxed, I felt a sharp pain in my thumb. I cried out and fell back onto the bed. My heart was flying in my chest and I was dizzy. Somehow, his climax had caused his fangs to release and one of them pricked my thumb, and in the split-second it took me to pull my hand away he had drained enough for me to notice it (I had never felt this weak after donating blood).
“Okay,” I said, and kissed his ear, “let’s look at this logically, see if we can figure it out.” I climbed out of bed, certain that he noticed that I had to steady myself on the night stand as I grabbed a pen and paper. I sat back down on the bed next to him and began to write. “Okay, so when you, mmmmm, peaked, your fangs dropped down and one of them pierced me. Do you think it has something to do with the link, how it’s changed to allow you to be near me, be with me? Or maybe it has something to do with the change process? Or maybe the changed link has changed how you can feed? Maybe it’s because you’ve never been intimate with a human, or maybe it’s because you’re intimate with the human you’re linked with? Maybe it happens with other vampires? Has Carlos ever said anything about it?”
He gave me an exasperated look, “We’re close Sarah, but not that close.”
“Well, you could ask him you know,” I said.
He shook his head. “Uh-uh, no way,” he said, “I do not want ask him that. If you want to, you go right ahead, but I can’t.”
“Okay. I will the next time I see him,” I said. “But, regardless of why or how it happened, I still feel completely safe with you. I think this just happened because my thumb happened to be near your fang when it descended, it didn’t feel like you actively or instinctively went searching for my blood. Anything I missed so far?” I asked.
“No,” he whispered.
“So here’s my thinking,” I went on as I rolled onto my stomach and he gently began tracing his finger down my spine. “You’ll just have to really pay attention, see if you begin to have strong cravings when you’re near me… and I’ll make sure to keep my fingers out of your mouth,” I smiled.
“I guess,” he replied, “but I’m really scared that I’m going to hurt you. I’m wondering if, as much as it hurts me to even think about it, if I shouldn’t take you home and continue on alone until I think I’ve found all the answers.”
My face fell, my lower lip quivered, “Wwwhhhat?” I stammered. “Wait a second, don’t you think that’s a little extreme? I mean, these clues that we’re getting, they’re complicated. I could see something that you don’t. If I’m not here, you could miss something. You said this feels like something that’s important we do together, I feel that too. And for the first time in years, I’m actually feeling something, feeling alive, please don’t take that away from me,” I whispered.
“I don’t want to, but I have to keep you safe,” he said.
“How do you feel right now?” I asked. “Right now, you’re inches away from me, you can smell my blood, you can feel it pulsing, you can hear my heartbeat. Do you feel the same hunger you do when you’re near the blood that you do feed on?”
“No,” he replied, thinking hard. “Not at all, all I want to do is love and protect you.”
“Then it must have been an accident, there must be some sort of sexual trigger, and we’ll just have to be more careful when we’re together… at least until I’m like you.”
I must have convinced him because he smiled then, leaned down and began kissing me. I stopped suddenly and pulled his face away, staring into his eyes.
“What! What is it? Are you afraid? Do you want me to stop?” he said.
“No, silly,” I smiled. “I just remembered something I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while, but you seem to distract me so often that I keep forgetting.”
He sat up on one elbow. “Anything, ask me anything at all.”
“Do you remember your life at all before you were changed?” I asked.
His sad eyes answered before he did, “Yes.”
“I’d really like you to tell me about it, if you’re okay with that,” I said.
“Of course I’m okay with it,” he said, “I want you to know everything about me, it’s just that the end was a very sad and hard time for me. It’s difficult to talk about.” He took a deep breath and continued. “I was a police officer in Boston. I was still grieving the loss of my wife Ginny, she had passed away during childbirth a year before. We had been married for ten years and she so desperately wanted to give me a child. I wanted one too, but I could see the toll that every loss was taking on her. She had already suffered several miscarriages and was told it could be dangerous to try again, but she stubbornly convinced me to try one more time and things really seemed like they were going to work out this time. She went in to labor late one Friday night and I sent for the doctor. She seemed to be in such pain, more than what my friends had told me about. Our son, Samuel, was stillborn. When the doctor told her, she cried out in anguish and that was when the horrendous bleeding started. The doctor tried so hard but he couldn’t get it stopped. She died later that night.”
He wiped the tears that were streaming down my face and continued. “I went back to work but I was a robot. I requested the night shift, seeking out the most dangerous parts of the city. One night I heard a muffled scream coming from a dark alley. I went to investigate and surprised a man who was assaulting a woman. I shoved him away and turned to tell the woman to run, but he pulled out a pistol and shot me, in the chest. I fell to the ground and the woman screamed and ran out of the alley. The man shot at her and narrowly missed her head. I knew I was dying. I could feel the blood running out, much too fast. He had to have nicked an artery or the bullet penetrated my heart. Just before death came, though, I suddenly had the sensation that I was surrounded by someone or something. I felt myself being lifted and floating through the air. I thought I was dying, and I was glad. I awoke several days later in an ancient looking fortress and was told what had happened to me and what had been done. I was very angry at first because I wanted to join my Ginny in death. But I spent the next six months studying with them and learning. I saw all the good in what we do. I left with a small sense of purpose after those six months… and my second kill was the man who had been trying to rape that woman.” He stopped then, emotionally exhausted, and I didn’t ask him to tell me more, not then, it would have been too much.
I put my arms around him and gently caressed his hair, saying the only words I needed to say, “I’m glad you didn’t die.” That was enough, for now.
We stayed that way for hours, too emotionally drained from everything to move. A while later there was a light knock at the door. I grabbed the robe off the chair, tied it around me and turned around to see Matthew, fully dressed (of course) and walking to the door. “Must be nice,” I said, smiling at him and shaking my head, looking down at me in my robe. He introduced Omoruyi to me, who politely shook my hand. He had a wonderfully kind face with eyes that sparkled. Matthew knew it was time to leave but seemed reluctant to go. “I’ll be fine,” I said. “I’ll order room service and watch a movie” He took my palm and lightly traced my scar.
“I’ll let you know when I’m on my way back,” he smiled. He wrapped me in his warm embrace, kissed me, then turned and was gone. I locked the door and then picked up the phone. I ordered a sandwich and soda. There wasn’t any cell service here, so I couldn’t spend any time listening to voicemails or sending emails, but I decided to compose a few emails anyways, saving them to send later. There wasn’t much in the way of TV, but I managed to find Casablanca and I settl
ed in to watch it. I love that movie, but I was so exhausted that it wasn’t long before I was sound asleep.
My eyes flew open, thinking someone was in the room. It was dark – what had awakened me? I smiled and relaxed when I felt my scar tingling and knew what it was. He was letting me know he was on his way home. I rolled over and looked at the clock, two a.m, and then began tracing my own scar for him – this was better than a cell phone any day. I tried to keep my eyes open, enjoying the sensation but soon drifted off to sleep again with a smile on my face. The next time I woke there was someone in the room – no fear this time though for I instantly knew it was my Matthew – and I was definitely enjoying the way he was letting me know he was back.