Finally, when she could no longer endure the overwhelming sensations, she released herself totally with a cry of rapture, before slowly sinking back to rest on his rapidly moving chest, which was shimmering with the visible signs of his exertion. They stayed locked together, Kate contentedly sheltering in the crook of his arm, her eyes half closed as she revelled in the luxury of being in love with the only man who had ever mattered to her.
It was with great reluctance that she finally dragged herself away from him, but she longed for a cool, refreshing shower before they faced the long trip back to Mombasa.
The bush was always full of mystery and excitement, but for Kate, today, the colours were more vibrant, the sky a clearer, brighter blue than ever before, and the animals examples of perfect form and beauty. Sebastian held her hand, his thumb gently stroking over hers as if he would never let her go.
‘It will be so much fun, won’t it?’ he said. ‘Together again and you joining the family firm.’
Kate turned to smile at him and she nodded. She knew now that her working days for the charity were numbered and she was about to begin a new and exciting part of her life—with Sebastian.
‘I can’t wait, but I wonder how Daddy is going to react—and your mother?’ she said, suddenly anxious.
‘Delighted, I’m sure,’ Sebastian told her firmly, drawing her back in his arms, and she settled down, confident that everything was going to be all right.
The villa was empty when they returned.
‘They must have gone out for the day,’ Sebastian said, returning to Kate who stood waiting in the hall. The look of disappointment on her face was palpable. ‘It’s all right. We can tell them the good news tonight.’
Kate nodded in agreement It was so hard not to scream the news from the rooftops!
‘I’m going back into town. There’s some work I really must see to,’ Sebastian explained, lightly planting a kiss on Kate’s cheek.
‘I’ll come,’ Kate said, dreading the thought of them being apart. ‘I can go to the charity offices in Mombasa. I’d like to see some of my projects in action,’ she continued, failing to see the dark shadow that fell across Sebastian’s face.
‘Don’t you think you’d best stay here?’ he argued. ‘For when your father gets back,’ he added as an extra incentive.
Kate shook her head firmly, feeling disappointed that Sebastian seemed reluctant to take her along.
‘All right, come on,’ he said, extending his hand, but Kate sensed he was unhappy with her decision.
He dropped her off in the main square and Kate said she would take a cab back home as neither of them knew how long they would be. She went and looked around the spartan charity offices—a complete contrast with hers in London. There was no computer, no fax-machine or photocopier, just a couple of very old desks and an old Bakelite telephone.
The filing system consisted of an assortment of cardboard boxes and the charts on the paint-peeling walls were yellowed with sunlight and age. Kate listened attentively as Moses, her Kenyan co-worker, gave her a full commentary on all her work. She felt a stab of regret as she left the small bungalow building and realised she would never be part of that team again.
‘Allan!’ she cried in surprise as she recognised the familiar face. ‘How are you?’
‘Kate. How delightful. What are you doing here?’ he asked in surprise, nodding to the building she had just come out of.
‘It’s where I work—at least I work for its counterpart in England,’ she explained.
‘How marvellous! Such good work but so frustrating. I’m still struggling with local officials but it would seem that Duplas win the day,’ he said regretfully, shaking his head.
‘Duplas?’ asked Kate, something stirring in her memory.
‘You remember I told you about them? They are opening a plant here. It is bad for the people, bad for the environment, but I can do nothing,’ he said in a resigned tone.
‘Maybe I could help through the charity,’ Kate said hurriedly, hating to see his disappointment, and the thought of this company so blatantly exploiting the area.
‘I fear, Kate, it’s too late. The man from Duplas signed the papers only moments ago. Yet another victory for free enterprise,’ he added bitterly.
Duplas, Duplas, Duplas: the name rang through Kate’s mind. She had heard it somewhere, but couldn’t quite place it.
‘Kate, Kate, what is it? Are you ill?’ demanded Allan, watching in horror as all the colour drained from Kate’s face. Now she recalled where she had heard the name before! Her head was swimming as she tried to focus her mind. It couldn’t be true—not Sebastian; he wouldn’t, would he? she questioned herself, remembering just how ambitious Sebastian was. No wonder he hadn’t wanted her father to know of his plans to diversify. Howard would never have agreed to such a plan!
‘I’m fine. Fine. It must be the heat,’ she pretended. ‘Just get me a cab, Allan. I’ll be OK,’ she reassured him, her voice gaining conviction and strength as she thought of Sebastian’s betrayal. Her mind was in a turmoil. She didn’t want to believe it, but the facts were all falling neatly into place. After years of convincing her she wasn’t ready to join her father’s company, he’d finally offered her a position only when he’d learned of her Third World work and was obviously frightened she would find out about his intentions—as indeed she had.
Kate felt a rush of colour to her face. She had been such a fool, falling for his masterly seduction when all he wanted was to have her safely ensconced in the family business where she could do no harm! As a member of the company she would be forced to agree to his diversification plans no matter how much they went against her principles.
‘Sebastian! Sebastian!’ she yelled, the moment she entered the front door of the villa. She was determined to face him straight away.
The door to the office opened and she spun around, the bitter taste of betrayal and humiliation burning her throat.
‘Kate?’ queried Louisa, her face troubled. ‘Is there something wrong?’
‘Where’s Sebastian?’ snapped Kate, her eyes burning with hot, unshed tears.
‘I’m afraid he’s not here at the moment. He has gone to town to sign some papers.’
‘Has he?’ Kate said with an ironic tone.
‘He’s just telephoned through. He also told me you were returning to the family business.’ Louisa smiled too sweetly, but Kate was far too lost in her own emotions to catch the sound of panic rising in Louisa’s voice.
‘No, never!’ she bit back, knowing that she could never do that, not now. ‘Louisa,’ she said, a dull realisation coming over her, ‘you deal with all the company correspondence, don’t you?’
Louisa looked troubled as she shuffled a sheaf of papers in her hands, her fingers moving agitatedly over the edges.
‘Not all,’ she said quietly.
‘Then who does?’ Kate demanded, knowing now why her father had never answered her letters—he had never received them.
‘Sebastian,’ Louisa told her. Her eyes remained fixed on her papers; she didn’t raise her head to face Kate, who nodded to herself. It was the final piece in the jigsaw. It had been Sebastian all along, keeping her apart from her father. She should have known! How love can put blinkers over your eyes, Kate thought sadly, suddenly feeling drained.
‘I think I’ll go and lie down,’ she told Louisa. ‘I’ll see Sebastian later,’ she added, surprised by the venom in her tone as she said his name.
But she couldn’t rest, despite the throbbing in her head and dull ache in her heart. She felt such a fool. After all this time she should have known that Sebastian didn’t really care for her. Yet part of her so desperately wanted to believe that there was some mistake, and that some simple explanation would clear him of any guilt.
The moment Kate heard his car she rushed downstairs, eager to face him and to know the truth. Inwardly, she was praying that he was innocent, that he did truly love her. She rushed down, breathless with exertion. Seb
astian looked up, frowning when he saw her.
‘Kate, what is it?’ he demanded, seeing the distraught look in her eyes, the bright gleam that warned him something was wrong.
‘I want to know about the Duplas deal,’ she told him, facing him squarely. Her outward manner was tough, despite how she felt inside.
Sebastian stiffened. ‘We’d better discuss this in private.’ His words hung in the air as he made his way into the study.
‘Now, what’s all this about, Kate?’ he said softly, closing the door behind them. His hands came up to rest on her arms but Kate moved away. She knew how his touch affected her and she wanted the whole truth first. His brow creased, confusion and anger flitting across his face.
‘I’ve spoken to Allan Doran today,’ she said. ‘He told me all about the deal.’
‘Told you what?’ Sebastian’s anger was growing now on equal pace to Kate’s, and they stood facing each other, fury welling up between them. Kate delighted in his reaction. She had hit her mark and, though it hurt, she still pressed on, her anger and her sense of bitter betrayal urging her to show him how strong she was.
‘About the deal, the effects the plant will have on the environment and the people.’ The contempt in her voice was now evident, and the scorn on her face added to the cutting edge of her words. ‘And how he tried to stop it…’
‘And you believe him?’ demanded Sebastian, taking hold of her upper arms in a tight, strong grip, forcing her to look at him.
‘Well, it does explain a lot, doesn’t it?’ Kate jeered, longing to hear him deny her accusation—but he didn’t.
‘Does it?’
‘Yes, it does,’ she snapped back, hating the hard grip he had on her, which was bereft of any of the tenderness he had shown the night before. ‘You didn’t want to share details of the Duplas plan, and you certainly didn’t want me back, did you?’ She didn’t wait for a reply. Her own sense of lost love was urging her on. ‘You know, I could never understand why Daddy never replied to my letters, but now I do. It was you, wasn’t it? You were determined to make sure I stayed away so you could implement your plans—’
‘No, Kate!’ he cut in, his grip tightening further.
‘Yes!’ she cried. ‘You wanted to make sure your plans to diversify went ahead without any hitches, but because of my charity work I might have found out, become a threat, and you couldn’t stand the thought of that.’
‘I don’t know what you’re talking about! Listen to me; let me explain.’ His voice was calmer now, more in control, but the throb of a nerve at his temple warned her that he was barely keeping his temper in check.
‘No, you listen! These people are poor—desperately poor—and, yes, they want to work. But you’re taking advantage of that—paying them a pittance while you make huge profits!’
Kate paused, then shook herself free. She saw the stung, hurt look on Sebastian’s face, but her own personal pain was greater. ‘You disgust me,’ she spat out at him.
‘You’re not even prepared to listen, are you?’ he growled, his eyes diamond-hard chips. ‘You’ve already condemned me.’
There was a kind of sorrow in his voice that she had not expected.
‘Then why won’t you deny it?’ she asked, her tone filled with a desperate plea. She longed to hear him tell her it was all a mistake but he remained silent, just looking at her.
‘Why should I?’ he finally retorted, his voice as cold as the icy look on his face. ‘You already know the truth, don’t you, Kate?’ he taunted, and, with that, he turned on his heel and left her alone in the study. The faint scent of his aftershave hung in the air—the only sign that he had been there—and Kate had never felt so utterly alone in all her life.
Kate had been awake for hours. In fact she hadn’t been sleeping properly for weeks. Terry had already left for work. He knew something was wrong and didn’t want to pressurise her. He knew the type of work they did could put people under strain and he could see that the effects were evident in Kate.
She stared at the damp brown patch on the ceiling, the old, yellowing, peeling paint that only added to the dreariness of the room and her heavy, depressed mood. It was three months since her return from Kenya and she had not seen or heard from Sebastian since then.
Not that she wanted to, she reminded herself as she pushed off her quilt and tripped over to the bathroom. She cast an anxious glance at the calendar that was pinned to her door on the way. With each passing day the reality that she might be pregnant became stronger. She was dreading the weekend: it was her father’s birthday and a family party had been arranged, one she knew she had to attend, but the thought of seeing Sebastian filled her with fear.
‘Morning, Kate—you’re in early,’ called Terry, looking up from his papers as she arrived at the office. ‘Moses has phoned from Mombasa. He said you’d asked him to look into something.’
‘Yes—yes, I did,’ Kate replied, showing the first sign of animation in months. Terry looked up at her, studying her features in detail.
‘Don’t get excited. He says he’ll post the details.’
‘Is that all?’ Kate asked, her heart sinking, her shoulders sagging; and she suddenly felt drained again.
‘No. He told me tell you that Duplas were in the clear. I don’t know where you got your information from but Duplas are highly respectable. They’re really concerned with positive development of the environment, and have no intention of exploiting the people or their resources.’
‘I don’t believe it!’ Kate gasped, stunned by the news—and yet hadn’t part of her known that? She had, in her heart of hearts, known that Sebastian was innocent.
She sighed, her mind whirling. Why hadn’t he told her the truth? She just couldn’t understand.
‘Look, I don’t know what this is all about,’ Terry said. ‘I don’t want to know, I’ve enough to do, but I told you when you first began working here: don’t get personally involved. This work is stressful enough, without adding to it.’ He said this in a kindly way, looking at his young assistant with an air of sympathy.
‘I’m all right,’ Kate protested weakly.
‘Kate, why not take a couple of days off? Go home early, have a rest and a good long think. Maybe this work is getting you down. Perhaps you need a change? A new direction, maybe—just what the doctor ordered?
Kate nodded in reply. A long weekend certainly would perk her up and she knew she had to face Sebastian sooner or later—best to get it over with. Especially if she had to tell him she was pregnant. She couldn’t imagine how he would react.
She had to travel to her family home by train—she still didn’t have a car—and Clare had promised to pick her up at the station, but when Kate got there it was deserted. She scanned the car park, but Clare was not in sight
‘Kate!’ Sebastian’s abrupt tone cut through the still air, and she jumped in surprise as she turned to face him. He cast her a quick glance, frowning at the dark shadows under her eyes, before picking up her case and flinging it into the boot of his car. She climbed in, catching the stray scent of a heavy female perfume. Her heart knotted painfully in her chest Was she jealous? No, of course not! She rolled down the window to rid the car of the sickly smell. Sebastian flashed her a curious look.
‘How are you, Kate?’ His voice was stiff, formally polite, and Kate knew she had to be as formal in return.
‘Fine,’ she lied unconvincingly. ‘And yourself?’ And so they made polite conversation all the way to the house. Kate hated it. She longed to mention the Duplas plant and her mistake, but the dark look in Sebastian’s eyes made the words freeze on her lips.
Finally he drew the car to a halt outside the house, keeping the engine running.
‘Aren’t you coming in?’ she asked when he remained seated, rapping his fingers impatiently on the steering-wheel.
‘No, I’m due back at the office,’ he informed her crisply, not even bothering to take his eyes off the road ahead.
‘Oh.’ Kate was disappointed.
‘I was hoping to talk to you…’ Her heart fluttered as he turned his icy gaze on her.
‘Were you?’ he asked, puzzled. ‘I can’t imagine that we have anything to discuss—can you?’ he added.
‘Can I have my case?’
‘Help yourself.’
‘What a gentleman.’
‘You know full well I’m not,’ he returned.
‘Sebastian…’ Kate pleaded, longing to make amends, but his patience was at an end.
‘I’m late, Kate. Hurry up!’ he snapped, turning his attention back to the road.
Kate wasted no time. Tears were already threatening to fall as she pulled her case from the boot. She slammed it closed. The moment she did so Sebastian roared off, leaving her staring after him. She had ruined everything. There was nothing left between them now—only bitterness.
‘Kate, darling!’ Clare’s warm welcome broke into her thoughts. Kate turned, forcing a smile on her face, but the smile was not genuine and anyone could see the sadness in her eyes.
‘Come and sit down, Kate, and tell me what’s going on with you and Sebastian,’ said Clare briskly, ushering her inside.
‘Me and Sebastian?’ Kate echoed, trying to feign surprise, and failing.
‘Yes, Kate.’ Clare sighed wearily. ‘He’s been like a bear with a sore head since the holiday.’
‘Has he?’ Kate asked, trying to keep her emotions well-hidden in the deepest recesses of her mind.
‘Were we wrong, Kate? We really thought if you went on safari together—’ Clare began, but Kate cut in, surprised by the revelation.
‘That was deliberate?’ She was nonplussed.
‘Well, it could have easily been cancelled—’
‘Then why wasn’t it?’ Kate interrupted her. It could have saved her from all this trouble!
Clare sighed again in frustration. ‘Really, Kate,’ she said exasperatedly. ‘You and Sebastian have loved one another from the day you met, but you looked up to him far too much, and, believe me, that’s no way for a relationship to last. My first marriage—to Sebastian’s father—failed not because he was older than me, but because I changed, matured, wanted him to meet me on equal terms, and he couldn’t.’ She confessed this with a deep sigh of regret.
On Equal Terms Page 15