The words had come into his mind without warning. He didn’t even know what they meant. How could someone like him—someone who’d made so many bad choices—ever be truly new?
And yet, it became his prayer. Make me new. On the slopes and off.
He was tired of living the same old life, doing the same things, making the same bad decisions, getting in the same fights. He wanted to surrender his anger, his frustration, his ego as much as he wanted to surrender control on the mountain. That freedom—he craved it.
Happy had agreed to clear his schedule to work with Grady, and together they’d come up with the ideal training and eating program for the two weeks before his last chance to qualify for the team. His last chance to keep his promise to Benji. His last chance to prove to the world that they were wrong about him.
The days were full. He was surrounded by people. Coaches who’d all but written him off seemed open to the new and improved version of him.
On Saturday, while Grady was packing up after practice, Brian stopped by. So far, Grady had only spoken to him in passing.
“Looking good out there, Benson,” Brian said. “Seems like you finally got that left leg to cooperate.”
“You mean I finally started listening to my coach?” Grady stood and faced the other man.
Brian gave him a wry grin. “Something like that.”
“Figured it was about time,” Grady said. “Hoping I can redeem myself next weekend.”
“You keep skiing like you have been this week, and I think you just might.”
“Thank you, sir.”
Brian started for the locker room door.
“Coach?” Grady called out.
He turned around.
Grady’s eyes found the floor. “Look, I wanted to apologize. Officially. I behaved badly for a lot of years, and I always thought I’d float through. I disrespected you, and I am sorry for that.”
Brian stuck his hands on his hips and gave Grady a quick once-over. “You mean that, don’t you?”
“I believe I do, sir.”
The coach lifted his chin, peering down at Grady as he did. “Apology accepted.”
“Thank you, Coach.”
“What’d they do to you in that little town?” Brian asked.
Grady laughed. “I guess they made me want to be a better man.”
Slowly, Brian started shaking his head. “I never thought I’d see the day.”
“Sir?”
“When Grady Benson actually fell in love.”
“No, sir, I’m not—”
“Whoever she is, she’s good for you,” Brian said. “That’s when you hold on. Both hands. Don’t let her go.”
If only it were that easy.
“You going out tonight?” Brian’s question felt like a test—one Grady was confident he could pass.
“No, sir. I’m heading to the hotel to get some rest.”
“Good answer.”
But it was in these times, when he was on his own, resting, that Grady’s mind started working him over. During the day, it was easy. There were people everywhere. Coaches, Happy, other skiers. But now? When he was in his suite staring at the dark ceiling? The only thing he could think about was Quinn and how different he wished everything could be.
He’d tried texting her. He’d even called her twice, but the calls went straight to voice mail. She didn’t want to talk to him—obviously.
And while he should take the hint, he couldn’t get Brian’s advice out of his head. Hold on. Both hands. Don’t let her go.
If only there were someone to tell him how to hold on to someone who didn’t want to be held.
CHAPTER
36
SATURDAY. RACE DAY. Nerves bounced around in Grady’s stomach as he woke up early, got dressed, and did something he had never done before a race his entire life.
He prayed.
The past two weeks had been lonely ones, and while he called Jaden regularly for updates on Harbor Pointe, being separated from Quinn was harder than he thought it would be. Happy had helped him harness his disappointment, turning it into something that drove him forward, made him push harder, but he’d already decided that once the race was over, he was going straight back to Michigan to get Quinn back.
She’d taught him to fight for what he wanted. Well, he wanted her.
And so he’d fight.
But first, he had to secure his spot on the team.
He arrived early and warmed up, staying focused and keeping his goal right in front of him.
That goal? To win.
He could come in first, second, or third and be eligible for the US ski team, but first place would go a longer way with the coaches and the committee. He’d made a decent impression, but if he didn’t back up his change in attitude with a stellar performance today, he could forget about the Olympics.
He could forget about the gold medal.
He stuck his earbuds in and flipped on his music—anything to tune out the crowd. He’d run the course so many times the last two weeks, he knew it by heart. He supposed he should thank Quinn for kicking him out of Harbor Pointe early—it had been good for him.
And yet, he couldn’t be completely glad he’d had the extra time, not when it meant he’d missed out on days with her.
“You eat this morning?” It was Happy, checking in as usual. Grady hadn’t heard him over his music, but he’d read his lips.
He tugged the earbuds out of his ears. “I ate. I stretched. I ran the course in my mind.”
“So you’re ready.”
“I hope so.” Grady let out a sigh.
“That didn’t sound too convincing.” The voice came from behind him. He spun around and found Quinn standing there, wearing the poofy white ski coat and a bright-turquoise stocking cap, looking every bit as beautiful as he remembered.
He blinked for several speechless seconds—was she really right in front of him? Finally, he found his voice.
“What are you doing here?”
Her eyes widened. “Should I not have come? I don’t want to mess you up.”
“Are you kidding? No, of course you should’ve come. I’m just—” Floored? Ecstatic? Surprised? All of the above. “Did you drive?”
“I flew.” She looked proud of herself.
“You flew?” He shook his head, drinking her in. She flew—to be there with him?
At his side, Happy cleared his throat.
“Oh, sorry. Quinn, this is my trainer, Happy.”
Quinn smiled—that perfect, warm smile—and shook Happy’s outstretched hand.
“I guess we have you to thank for whipping our boy into shape?” Happy asked.
Grady scoffed. “He’s just kidding.”
“No, he’s right. You do have me to thank.” She grinned. “I’m very bossy.”
“It’s good to meet you, Quinn. I’m going to go take a look at the lineup, Grady. I’ll see you in a little bit.” Happy walked off, leaving him standing there, still in disbelief.
He studied her as if she were the only person there. “Am I dreaming?”
She smiled up at him, the kind of smile that made the rest of the world melt away, then sobered. “I was so stubborn and stupid.”
“I understand why you were upset.”
“No, it was wrong of me. My dad told me the truth about everything. And I was mad at him, too, but I know you didn’t tell me about my mom because you didn’t want to hurt me. She left without saying a word to me, and that does hurt. I know I may never understand all of the real reasons why she stayed away—why she didn’t fight for us—but none of that was ever your fault, and I’m sorry if I acted like it was.”
He reached over and brushed a stray hair away from her face. “Forgotten. I’m just so glad you’re here.” He pulled her into a tight hug, drawing in the scent of her, mapping the moment in his mind.
She pulled away and brought her eyes to his. “Are you nervous?”
He shook his head. “I’m ready.”
“I’m going to
be here cheering you on—no matter what. And Jaden and Carly and my dad and everyone else are watching the race in the clubhouse at Cedar Grove. They’re all really excited for you.”
He gave her a nod. “I gotta go. You okay here?”
She smiled again. “Don’t give me a second thought. Go do what you came here to do.”
He leaned in and kissed her. “I could never not give you a second thought.” He walked off to where Happy stood and tried to get ready for the most important race of his life, a newfound hope bursting inside at the knowledge that the woman he loved was here to carry him through.
As soon as she saw him, all her hesitations about coming to the race floated away like driftwood on the lake.
Now she stood off to the side, puzzled by the scene in front of her.
“Quinn?” Happy motioned for her to come closer. She scooted through the crowd and stood next to him. “Grady wanted me to make sure you were okay. Said it might all get a little confusing to you.”
“Yeah, I’m not much of a skier.”
“He told me.” A grin from the muscular man, whose eyes were warm and friendly. “Look, I don’t know how you feel about the guy, but he’s changed, and I really do think we have you to thank.”
She shook her head and glanced up at the big screen in front of her, where she saw Grady at the top of the mountain. “I didn’t do anything.”
“You gave him something he’s never really had: a true, genuine relationship. He’s like a different guy. Humble, willing to learn. Yeah, he’s still got some rough corners, but he’s trying—he’s even asked me a few questions about God, and I never thought I’d see that happen.”
“Really?” Quinn had hoped—and prayed—that Grady might’ve finally made his peace with God. Could it be true?
“Yeah,” Happy said. “It’s good you’re here—he needs you, no matter what happens today.”
Quinn let the words soak in. She’d never really felt needed before—and she’d never let herself need anyone else. She had a feeling those days were over.
Risky as it was, it was worth it. He was worth it.
“Here he goes.” Happy squeezed her arm, and she turned her attention back to the screen.
“What does he need to do to qualify?”
Happy glanced at her, then looked back at the screen. “Technically third place or higher, but you know Grady—he needs to win.”
The realization sent a nervous chill down her spine, but her panic was short-lived. He took off like a shot just as a text came in from Carly. A photo of so many familiar faces gathered at the clubhouse at Cedar Grove. The caption read, Go Grady! Your Harbor Pointe family is cheering you on!
She wished it had come in a little bit sooner, because now she wouldn’t be able to show him until he finished.
She glanced up and saw him shoot down the hill, taking each jump with the relaxed coolness of someone who didn’t have a care in the world. He landed each one perfectly.
She leaned over to Happy. “He’s doing well, right?”
Happy’s laugh bubbled over. “He’s doing awesome!”
Quinn watched, holding her breath whenever there was air between his skis and the ground, but each time, he nailed the landing and shot forward.
The crowd cheered with every jump, every turn, every smooth maneuver by a man who’d once lived for that praise. She had a feeling, though, that after this last month, maybe Grady was looking for something a bit more lasting than the fleeting affirmation of a fickle crowd.
At least she hoped so.
As he made another turn, he came into view—not just on the big screen, but in front of them, in living color.
“He’s in first.” Happy let out a cheer.
She folded her hands and pressed them to her lips, whispering a silent prayer as he crossed the finish line to the sound of more cheering.
Her phone buzzed as text messages from her family came in alarmingly fast.
He did it!
Grady Benson is back!
Tell him how proud we are of him!
She tucked the phone inside her coat pocket, drinking in the moment along with the rest of Grady’s adoring fans.
Happy scooted out. “You coming?”
“No, no, go ahead.” She didn’t want to get in the way.
She watched as Grady pulled his helmet and goggles off, bent over at the waist for several seconds as if he needed time to recover. He stayed like that for longer than Quinn expected him to, then reached down and took off his skis.
Happy reached him, and Grady stood and pulled his trainer into one of those tight guy hugs, the kind that seemed to only accompany victory.
And as he leaned away, his eyes searched the spectators. Happy pointed in her direction, and Grady found her, then waved her over.
When she didn’t move, he ran over to the stands, ignoring the cheers of the fans, eyes zeroed in on her. “Get down here, Quinn Collins. This one was for you.”
She smiled and inched her way out from behind the teenagers who were now gawking in her direction.
He took her hand and pulled her out of the crowd, then wrapped his arms around her.
“I’m so excited for you,” she said. “You have to be on cloud nine.”
He kissed her—right there in front of everyone—as the next racer took off like a bullet out of a gun. “I couldn’t have done this without you, Quinn. You—you’re everything I never knew I needed.”
She felt the smile wash across her face. How did she respond to that? She felt exactly the same way about him.
“You got some time for the reporters, Grady?” Happy stood at his side.
She expected to go back to her seat, but Grady slipped his hand in hers and led her off toward where the press was waiting.
But before they reached the expectant throng of paparazzi, Grady came to a halt. His face had gone pale, any trace of excitement gone.
“What’s wrong?” She followed his gaze to a small group of people standing off to the side. “What is it, Grady?”
“It’s my family.”
CHAPTER
37
HOW LONG HAD IT BEEN since his parents were in the stands at one of his races? He’d lost count of the years. There was too much distance, so much that Grady had given up on ever reconciling with them.
It was only Benji he cared about now.
Even so, it had been years since he’d seen his brother too. They spoke on the phone or texted back and forth. It had always seemed like enough, but looking at him now, Grady regretted the lost time.
Quinn slipped her hand inside his, and he drew strength from her presence. She knew so little about his family, yet it was like she understood instinctively. He’d only ever alluded to what had happened to Benji—surely she must have questions now, seeing him here, in his wheelchair.
The air became tense as they approached his family, waiting off to the side as if they were just another group of fans. His mom’s eyes glistened in the sunlight of the clear Colorado morning, and his dad stood there stoic and serious. Clearly it hadn’t been his idea to come.
Benji’s face beamed with the kind of pride only an older brother could have.
Grady stopped short of actual physical connection with any of them. “You didn’t tell me you were coming.”
“We wanted it to be a surprise,” Benji said.
“Benji wanted it to be a surprise,” Mom said. “He got his new chair, and he’s a lot more mobile, so they cleared him to make the trip.”
“Thanks, Gray,” Benji said. “You know I didn’t expect you to chip in for that.”
“It was nothing,” Grady said. The Spectre check had been enough to catch up on his bills and get the chair, something Benji’s physical therapist said would be good for him. It was all Grady needed to hear, and he ordered it the next day.
“Who’s your friend?” Mom smiled cautiously at Quinn, who straightened, probably unsure how to navigate the tension.
“Oh, this is Quinn.” Grady
turned to her. “Quinn, these are my parents, Randall and Charlene; and my brother, Benji.”
Her smile was polite, but her eyes were full of questions. “It’s so good to meet you all.”
“Ah, so you’re the one who got him back on track.” Benji winked at her, and Grady didn’t have to look over to know her cheeks would be pink.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Quinn said. “He was already pretty amazing.”
A pregnant pause. He bet his father would disagree.
“Why don’t we go get something to eat?” Benji was obviously going to power through the strain in the air.
“Grady probably has people to see.” Those were the first words his father had spoken—an excuse to get out of spending more time with him.
“Actually, Grady is all yours.” Happy had found them standing there, and what a time to insert himself into the conversation. Happy had made it clear more than once that Grady needed to at least attempt to repair things with his family, but Grady didn’t want that reminder right now.
“Great,” Benji said after Happy introduced himself around. “You wanna come along?”
Happy shook his head. “You all go ahead. I’ll see you when you get back, Grady.”
Way to hang me out to dry, dude.
He turned to Quinn. “You’re coming, right?”
Her eyes were wide. “Do you want me to?”
“Yes, please.” Did he sound as desperate as he felt? “We can just go inside and eat here if that works for you guys,” Grady said.
“Sounds wonderful, Grady.” His mom looked like she might burst as she lunged forward and threw her arms around him. “It’s so good to see you.”
The hug was one-sided for several seconds, but finally he wrapped his arms around her and hugged back. When she finally pulled away, she had to wipe her cheeks dry.
“We’ll see you over there,” Grady said. “I’m just going to talk to the coaches quick.”
“Make sure you’re on the team,” Benji said. “Give us a real reason to celebrate.”
Grady nodded, then walked off, wishing he could rewind to the moment before he spotted them. If only he’d headed in the opposite direction, he could’ve pretended he never saw them at all.
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