“Thanks.”
“I’m really pleased for you, Quinn.” Her voice warmed. “You’re going to be a terrific dad.”
The impact of her joy for him was like an arrow to the heart. She hadn’t merely given him a lift, she’d carried him straight up into the stratosphere. Unable to help himself, he drew her close for what he planned to be a quick kiss.
At first, she resisted. All right, the lobby of the building where she worked wasn’t the best place to lock lips, even if the two of them weren’t in plain sight. But he didn’t let go of her and, slowly, she relaxed into his embrace.
For a minute, only one, they were lost in the kiss, and it was everything he remembered. Hot, hungry, exciting. Then Summer pulled away, sighing in a way that let him know she wished they were somewhere else. So did he.
“Sorry.” Quinn was quick to apologize. “My timing could be better.”
“That’s not the reason.”
“Right.” There was no need to rehash their previous conversations. A romantic relationship was off-limits for both of them.
“It’s complicated. In more ways than you realize.” Her eyes misted. “I love seeing you and Teddy together. You can’t imagine how I feel when I see him respond to you.”
“I’m glad. He’s a good kid, and I like him.”
“I’m glad, too. But seriously, Quinn, can you imagine him as a permanent part of your life?”
“I haven’t thought about it, to be honest.”
“Right. Why would you? We’re not to that point yet.”
Yet? It cheered him that she wasn’t ready to give up on them.
“If we were to get to that point sometime in the future,” she continued, “you’d need to think long and hard about parenting a special-needs child. Teddy won’t ever get better and may get worse.”
“You said yourself he’s making progress.”
“At managing his disorder. Which improves the quality of his life and makes mine easier. But there’s no cure.”
“I know that, Summer.” Quinn wanted to hold her again. He also doubted she’d allow it.
“Hal insists he wants more visits with Teddy. The sad truth is he can only handle an hour or two before he reaches his limit, and he’s Teddy’s father.”
Quinn wondered if perhaps there was more going on than she admitted. “I realize Hal hurt you.”
“And I don’t want to be hurt again.”
“No one does.”
“The thing is,” she said haltingly, “I have more than myself to worry about. There’s Teddy. He’s completely vulnerable, and I couldn’t stand it if he were to suffer because I made a wrong decision.”
“You and I aren’t a wrong decision.”
“Teddy’s very fond of you. I can see it in his face. He rarely makes eye contact, and he does with you. What if you find out you can’t cope with him? Not that I’d blame you. Eventually, we’d break up, you’d leave and Teddy would be devastated.”
“I wouldn’t just leave.”
“Quinn, be realistic. You’ve been through some very difficult years, I grant you that. Nothing, however, has prepared you for parenting an autistic child. The hardships are intense and unending and can sometimes outweigh the rewards.”
“I’m used to hardships.”
“I know you mean well.” She squared her shoulders. “I have to get back to work. Marty will be looking for me.”
Quinn walked her to the elevator. “I care about you, Summer. A lot. And I won’t give up on us that easily.”
“I can’t ask you to wait.”
“What if I’m willing?”
“Quinn.” She stopped and gazed fondly at him. “Whatever happens, promise me we’ll still be friends.”
Here it was. The dreaded let’s-be-friends proposition.
Because she looked so forlorn standing there, he said “Absolutely,” and pulled her against him for a hug, hoping against hope it wouldn’t be their last.
Chapter Seven
Pacing didn’t burn off any anxiety. Hadn’t Quinn learned that in prison?
According to Jenny’s last text message, they’d arrived at Sky Harbor Airport just before two. After a quick stop at her mother’s to rest and borrow the car, they’d be on their way.
It was now three thirty. Quinn estimated they should be there any minute. Even then, they’d have less than two hours at most for this first visit. That was, if he hoped to make the wedding rehearsal in time.
Jenny had hired a local attorney, sending Quinn an email even before the attorney made contact with Marty. As yet, there’d been no discussion of child support, custody or DNA testing. Only the visits for this weekend. When, where and for how long.
Summer had suggested Quinn not bring up any sensitive topics and focus solely on getting to know his daughter. She was right, of course.
Not one of the texts or emails he and Jenny had exchanged this past week contained a picture of Corrine, though Quinn had asked for some. No matter. He’d take plenty this weekend to make up for it. His parents couldn’t wait. They also wanted to video chat. Maybe tomorrow.
Jenny had conceded to a longer visit on Saturday in order to compensate for today and Sunday being cut short. He planned on taking them to breakfast at the Cowboy Up Café sometime during the weekend, depending on how things went. Perhaps the park in town, as well. Summer had mentioned the playground area as a place where a three-year-old might have fun.
“Not here yet?” Raquel asked. She’d come into the living room while Quinn was staring out the large picture window.
“Shouldn’t be long.”
She patted him on the arm. “Try to relax.”
“Easier said than done.”
Gabe’s mother was both matriarch of the Dempsey family and head of the household. Nearing sixty, she was pleasingly plump and still attractive. She frequently watched Josh’s two kids while he and Cara worked and treated them as if they were her grandchildren even though they weren’t technically related.
She’d also been kind to Quinn, going above and beyond to make him feel at home.
“For the nina?” She nodded at the stuffed purple pony Quinn held.
He set the pony on the coffee table. “Yeah.”
Another of Summer’s suggestions. Quinn had actually started a list.
“She will love it.” Raquel smiled approvingly. “All little girls love horses.”
“We’ll see.”
“I made some snacks. They’re on the kitchen table. Cold drinks are in the refrigerator.”
“You didn’t have to, but thanks.”
“You’re welcome. I’m excited to have another young one in the house.” She started to leave, then paused. “If you need anything, let me know.”
He couldn’t believe all Raquel had done to help him with Corrine’s visit, considering the house was in a state of chaos. The party store had recently delivered rental tables and chairs for the wedding reception tomorrow. Friends and family members were readying the backyard, frantically erecting canopy tents, cleaning and decorating. Even some of the therapy program parents had volunteered to help. Raquel was in charge of the kitchen. Not trusting the caterers, she’d insisted on cooking the pulled beef and pork herself.
On impulse, Quinn went over and gave her a friendly hug. Not until that moment did he realize how much he missed his mother and the rest of his family. Weekly phone calls weren’t enough.
“You’re a sweet one.” Raquel smiled kindly. “Someday, some lucky woman will figure that out.”
Quinn’s phone suddenly beeped, alerting him to yet another text message.
“I’ll let you get that.” Raquel padded away, returning to the kitchen.
Removing his phone from his pocket, Quinn checked the screen. The text wa
s from Jenny. They were close.
The length of the living room was exactly twenty-one feet. He knew because he’d walked it at least that many times. He’d owe Raquel new carpeting after today to make up for the wear and tear he’d put on it.
Seeing an approaching car through the window, he tensed. For months, he’d imagined this moment. How he’d react, what he’d feel. Would he and Corrine have an instant connection? Recognize each other on some kind of instinctive level?
What if she feared or disliked him on sight? It was possible—she wasn’t yet three. Did she even comprehend what was happening and who he was? How much had Jenny told her?
His stomach tied in vicious knots, he grabbed the stuffed pony off the coffee table and made his way outside.
Jenny parked in the driveway, following his instructions. By the time she shut off the car, Quinn was standing there, convinced his legs were about to give out. He hadn’t been this nervous before any of his national championship rides. Not even when he faced G.I. Joe, the bull who reputedly held the record for breaking more cowboys’ bones than any in history.
Jenny got out and smiled tentatively at him over the car roof. “Hi there. We made it.”
Quinn forced his legs to obey his brain’s signals and walked toward her. “Good to see you.”
“Is it, or are you just being nice?”
Unsure if she was being funny or serious, he chose to ignore the question. “You made good time.”
They stood face-to-face, the awkward moment stretching into two. Jenny was still attractive, her blue eyes vivid and her skin flawless. Once, a long time ago, she’d enticed her share of cowboys, Quinn included.
Now, as he studied her, he realized her looks left him lukewarm. He found Summer’s beguiling hazel eyes and the smattering of freckles across her nose much prettier and much more to his liking. And that lush mouth of hers? Infinitely sexier.
He wanted her with him now, with an ache that surprised him. Hopefully, she’d show up later. Would it look bad if he called her in front of Jenny?
“How was the flight?” Quinn finally asked.
“Could have been worse. Corrine didn’t cry a whole lot. Maybe she’s getting used to it.”
This took Quinn aback. “She’s flown before?”
Jenny snapped her mouth shut as if realizing she’d revealed too much. “We’ve visited my mother before.”
She traveled. Evidently a lot. It was on the tip of Quinn’s tongue to ask if Jenny had ever wanted to see him in prison. Summer’s words returned to him. Don’t bring up any sensitive topics.
Instead, he asked, “Where’s Corrine?”
“In the car.” Jenny shut her door and opened the rear one.
Quinn caught a flash of movement and heard a small voice say, “Mommy, Mommy.”
He inched closer and craned his neck to see into the backseat. A head covered in curly brown hair bobbed from side to side. Small hands reached up and grabbed Jenny. Quinn clutched the stuffed pony tighter.
All at once, Jenny straightened and stepped out from the open door, a beaming little girl in her arms. Quinn went still, his heart threatening to explode.
He wanted to say it was paternal love coursing through his veins, but that wouldn’t be accurate. The feeling was more akin to wonder and fascination. He’d fathered a child. A strikingly beautiful one.
Corrine noticed him at last and stared with enormous dark eyes the same color as his.
“Wow” was all Quinn could manage to say, his throat having gone completely dry.
At the sound of his voice, she averted her head and buried her face in Jenny’s shoulder.
“I know paternity testing is one of your requests,” Jenny said, “but I can assure you, she’s yours.”
“I believe you.” He swallowed. “Does she talk?” His nephew Nathan wasn’t much older and talked up a storm.
“Yes. But she’s shy around strangers.”
A stranger? Was that what he was? He wouldn’t be if things were different. If he hadn’t gotten angry that night—
“And she’s tired,” Jenny added. “The traveling’s disrupted her schedule.”
Was that a hint they should keep their visit short?
“She’s a beauty.”
Jenny’s smile went from tentative to glowing. “She is indeed.”
“Can I see her? Hold her?”
And, like that, Jenny’s smile disappeared. “Let’s give her a few minutes.”
Quinn clenched his teeth. He wouldn’t argue. That was probably what Jenny expected of him. Instead, he’d show her he’d changed.
“Would you like a tour of the ranch? It’s a little crazy around the house right now, what with the wedding tomorrow.”
In reply, Jenny started walking the short road leading to the horse stables and corral.
“I’m glad for Josh. He had a real rough time with his first wife.”
Jenny had known Josh through Quinn during their rodeo days. Those were also the days when Josh’s wife had been deep in the grip of addiction.
“I forgot how hot it is here.” Jenny paused and shifted Corrine to her other side.
When the little girl peeked out at Quinn over Jenny’s shoulder, he flashed her a grin. She buried her face but not before giggling. A second later, she looked up, and Quinn held out the pony. Corrine’s head shot up, and she reached out.
Jenny pivoted just as Corrine laughed, her small fingers gripping the pony’s mane. She didn’t appear happy.
“Well, say thank-you,” she told Corrine.
The girl muttered it too softly for Quinn to hear. “You’re welcome, honey.”
Jenny frowned.
Did she disapprove of him giving Corrine a gift? “Let’s check out the therapy horses. The stalls are shaded.”
“I’m trying to picture you working with special-needs kids,” she said when they continued walking. “Don’t take this wrong, but it’s not something I ever saw you doing.”
“I actually work with the horses and not the students.”
“You going back to the rodeo circuit?”
“No. Three years is a long time to be away. And besides being sorely out of practice, I’m not getting any younger.”
“What plans do you have for the future?”
The question could be a casual one. Then again, she might be fishing for information. His answer could impact any agreement they came to regarding Corrine.
“I’m still getting my bearings,” he finally answered. “It’s only been a few months since my release.”
“Sure, sure. But ultimately?”
She was fishing, he decided. “I like cattle ranching well enough and working with the horses.”
“So, you’re settling in Mustang Valley?”
“I’m willing to relocate and will if necessary. Whatever it takes to be near Corrine.”
“Not much call for a ranch hand in Seaside.”
“Your mother lives in Scottsdale. She must miss seeing you and Corrine.”
Jenny visibly stiffened. “If you’re proposing that I move, I have a job in Seaside.” She hesitated. “And someone special.”
He should have seen that coming. “Northern California is closer to Seaside than Arizona.”
“Your grandparents’ place?”
“Just tossing out ideas.”
Quinn’s grandfather had offered him a job the moment he was released. He owned one of the largest horse-breeding operations in the area. Quinn had turned him down, wanting a fresh start in a place where people didn’t know him and his history.
He’d live there, however, if it enabled him to be closer to Corrine. Heck, he’d live on the far side of the moon.
The only problem would be leaving Summer. He didn’t suppose it woul
d be possible to have both her and Corrine—
“Mommy, horseys.” Corrine lifted her free arm and pointed.
They’d reached the row of stalls where the therapy horses were housed. Jenny finally lowered Corrine to the ground. She immediately started forward, only to be held back by her mother.
“Be careful,” Jenny warned. “Horses can hurt you.”
Quinn thought it interesting how Jenny had changed. She used to be fearless. Motherhood must be responsible. Summer, Quinn had noticed, was also cautious with Teddy.
“Here,” he said. “Let me.”
Confident they had nothing to worry about with Mama, he grabbed Corrine under the arms and lifted her up, positioning her directly across from the gentle mare.
“No, Quinn!” Jenny tried to snatch his arm.
“It’s okay.”
Corrine squealed and wriggled for about three seconds, until Mama raised her nose and delicately sniffed her. Then Corrine burst into more giggles.
“The horsey kissed me.”
“Her name is Mama,” Quinn said.
“That’s silly.”
“Maybe a little.”
She reached out and patted the mare’s face. “Mama.”
Quinn stared, mesmerized, the paternal love he’d wondered about earlier filling him.
How he wished Summer were here. She’d tell him being a father involved a whole lot more than adoring one’s child, but he’d argue it was a start. And he did adore Corrine.
Oh, hell. Forget Summer’s advice to steer clear of sensitive subjects. Quinn didn’t want to communicate through attorneys. He was the kind of man who spoke for himself.
“Jenny, we need to talk. I’m going to do whatever it takes to make Corrine a permanent part of my life. She’ll know who her father is and not just because he’s someone who comes around once a year at Christmas or in the summer.”
“Not now, Quinn.”
“Then soon. Very soon.”
Jenny’s glance abruptly cut past him, and her frown returned.
Quinn pivoted to see Summer and Teddy appearing at the end of the stalls. They had Hurry Up with them, the small horse that belonged to Josh’s son Nathan. Summer smiled at Corrine with unabashed delight.
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