by Kelex
It felt better than he’d ever imagined.
To finally be inside Chance.
Finally.
Linc exploded, a growl of pleasure torn from his lips. He felt ripped apart as he flooded the condom, suddenly wishing he hadn’t worn it. He wanted to mark Chance as his, his seed laying claim to the man who’d always been his.
Always.
Linc held on tighter as his last strokes emptied him. He slowed, breathing hard.
Finally? Always? Laying claim? What the fuck was that about? Linc rubbed a hand over his face, trying to get control over his raging emotions. He avoided Chance’s stare as he withdrew, holding the edges of the condom. After a quick cleanup in the bathroom, he returned to release Chance from the restraints, still unable to look into the man’s face.
What is wrong with me?
The sex had been incredible. More incredible than any Linc could recall. So why did it suddenly feel so wrong?
As soon as Chance was freed, Linc strode into the bathroom and got a washcloth damp. He headed for the bed and withdrew the plug from Chance’s ass, the silence in the room thick. Once the plug was out, Linc wiped the cloth to pick up most of the excess lube and then jumped from the bed like it was on fire, tossing the cloth back into the sink.
When he was done, he leaned on the doorframe between the bedroom and bathroom and looked in Chance’s general direction. “I’ve got an early morning tomorrow. I should head out.”
Silence met the comment and made Linc feel like an even bigger asshole. He should.
He collected his clothing, pulling on his jeans before simply carrying his boots and shirt. The faster he could get out of there, the better.
“Thanks. For tonight.” Linc looked at his old, worn work boots.
“Get out.”
Linc finally looked up and saw the hurt on Chance’s face. It only made him feel ten times as bad. “Don’t.”
“Just get the fuck out of my sight,” Chance said, pulling the tarp over most of his body.
Linc nodded and turned toward the door. He raced out of the house and into his truck as fast as he could without looking like a bigger ass. As soon as he got behind the wheel, he brought his shaking hands to the steering wheel and tried to catch his breath. His heart was beating a hundred miles an hour, and new sweat had broken out on his forehead.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
Once he got a little control over himself, he started the engine and slowly pulled out of Chance’s driveway, even though he knew he shouldn’t leave things like this.
But he couldn’t stay a second longer.
Chance watched from the darkened window, relieved to see Linc finally pull away.
He’d known it was a mistake, from the first second, yet he’d succumbed so easily. Chance had wanted Linc for so long, that desire had made him stupid.
The moment Linc had seen the plug, the mood had changed. It was no longer a connection between two people but an emotionless fuckfest.
Damn him for not putting his shit away. This was what happened when you didn’t take care of your life and have order and control.
Chance sat back down on the bed and knew this was a sign.
It was time to get the hell outta town. L.A. was calling his name, and now was as good a time as any.
I didn’t even have a chance to tell him about the deal. Great.
Chapter Five
“So how was last night?”
Linc looked over his shoulder and saw Jax leaning in the doorway, holding a Styrofoam coffee cup. He turned back to the cabinets he was putting in and shrugged his shoulders. “Alright, I guess.”
“That good?”
Linc’s mind went back to the night before. He’d replayed the entire evening over and over again all night, not getting a wink of sleep. He wasn’t sure what had gone so wrong, or why he felt so off after the best night of sex in his life.
“I don’t know. It was just… weird.”
“How so?” Jax asked, before taking a sip from his cup.
Linc slipped his hammer back into his belt and turned, leaning on the counter he was about to install. “The sex was great, don’t get me wrong.”
“Woo! So Chance finally got himself some Linc. About time.”
Linc clenched his teeth. He didn’t know how to put what he was feeling into words, and Jax’s hooping and hollering wasn’t helping. “Man, cut the shit. I’ve got a serious problem here. I fucked up big time.”
Jax’s smile melted. “What the fuck did you do? He’s a great friend, and if you fucked up that relationship, I’m going to beat you to death.”
Linc lifted his hands in mock surrender. “Chill out. I gotta fix this, but I don’t even know why I fucked up in the first place.”
“What happened?”
“I took over some food. We talked a little. I kissed him and we headed upstairs. And then I saw some sex toys in his room and I flipped a switch. It got really dirty, really hardcore, really fast and I shouldn’t have taken it there. Not with Chance.”
“Why not with Chance?”
Because he’s special. The thought rocked Linc on his feet. He wasn’t sure how to answer Jax.
“Okay, here’s what I think, if you give a rat’s ass. I think there’s been a little part of you who’s liked that boy since you were in school. That’s why you defended him like you did and kept those asswipes from beating his ass. Then you avoided him because somewhere deep down, you liked his attention and were afraid he’d end up outing you to the world when you couldn’t hide your emotions.”
Linc opened his mouth to object, but nothing came out. He took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. Had he been that transparent? “What gave you that impression?”
“I was by your side through most of school. I saw your face when he came close, before you could hide your emotions. Why do you think I chose him to be our realtor?”
Linc’s gaze captured Jax’s. “You playing matchmaker now?”
“Apparently not well, since you only ignored him all the more. I told Golden about what I thought was true and he took over. That little spiel about how hot he thought Chance was—well, that was purely for your benefit. Must have done a pretty good job if he got the two of you into bed together. Too bad you had to go screw things up.”
“Welp, you’re wrong. It’s nothing like what you imagined.” Linc said the words but felt no fire behind them. He’d just been called out by his best friend, and he still couldn’t own up to the truth. He had been attracted to Chance all those years ago and it had frightened the hell out of him.
Chance had been his first boy crush.
Linc thought back to that day he got between Chance and his tormentors. To this day, he didn’t really know why he’d done it, besides the fact he couldn’t stand to watch Chance berated and belittled one more time. He knew as soon as he’d done it that it could be the day he’d be thrown out of the closet. Linc had drawn a lot of fire for that day, and some of his friends had ridden him about it for years after.
But not Jax. Jax had never opened his mouth once in regard to Chance, or Linc’s defense of the boy. Jax had been the first one he’d opened up to, just before graduation. To his surprise, Jax had opened up to him as well. They’d always been honest with one another since.
Until now.
Linc looked up and saw Jax’s cold stare.
“It’s not how I saw it, hmm? Then tell me. Why did you fuck things up?”
Linc scratched his head, unsure how to answer that question, either. “I have no fucking idea, man.”
“Sounds like you need to get a clue. And figure out a way to make it right, and fast, before he uses this as his excuse to hightail it outta here.”
Panic seized Linc’s chest at the thought. Chance couldn’t leave, especially with the way he’d left things the night before.
His phone buzzed in his belt, taking his focus away from the conversation. He fished it out and saw a new email in his inbox.
From Chance.
“I gotta get this,” Linc said, looking up at Jax.
Jax shook his head and turned. “You’d better make this right,” he called as he walked away.
Well, duh. Linc cast his eyes down and stared at the email for a full minute before summoning up the courage to open it. Finally he did, hoping and praying he wasn’t about to be berated, even though he knew he deserved it.
I didn’t get a chance to tell you last night. The owners of the property did not accept your offer, but put in a counteroffer of $23K. Ball’s in your court. We need to get this deal done and fast so I can clear it off my desk.
-C
Linc re-read the email, trying to read between any lines that could be there. Why did he need the deal done fast? Had Linc’s bad behavior pushed Chance into leaving, as he’d alluded to? Linc pulled off his tool belt and headed out the door. He climbed into his truck and let the engine roar to life.
He had absolutely no idea what he was about to do or say, but he couldn’t let Chance walk away.
Not without at least apologizing for what he’d done.
Chance stared at the screen, hoping for a quick response from Linc. The sooner he could close out the deal, the better. He didn’t want to think, see, hear, or even smell Linc McGrath ever again. He should’ve known the fantasy would’ve been better than reality. Now he could go back to dealing exclusively with Jax until he was ready to pack up and move on.
He’d already called the office in L.A., and they were more than ready for him to come on board. They’d even suggested he stay on in his office for a couple of months, two days a week, and spend three in the city, slowly building his business, taking the concern over lost income off the table some.
Tomorrow, he’d be sitting in the L.A. office, signing papers and meeting the rest of the team. Tomorrow would be the start of his new life, one away from Linc and his past.
Turning from the screen, he started going through some of his files and making phone calls to finish up a few deals in the works. He kept looking up at his computer screen, hoping Linc’s email would hurry up and come in.
Sadist.
Why torture yourself. He was only interested in a one-night fling. Hell, it was more like an hour-long fling. He used you, and now it’s over. Let it go.
Yet he kept looking to his screen, hoping to see a response.
The door to his office flung open.
Linc stood there, nearly out of breath. He slammed the door shut and plopped into the chair on the other side of Chance’s desk.
“We need to talk,” Linc spat.
Chance did everything in his power to look unaffected. He pulled open his notebook and turned to the page on the property he was trying to procure for Linc. Never lifting his head to look at Linc, he scribbled some notes on the page. “Did you want to accept their counteroffer?”
“Chance.”
“You could’ve just emailed me back. There was no reason to come in here,” Chance said, never lifting his head to look at Linc.
“Chance. Look at me.”
Chance did. “Do you want the fucking property or don’t you?”
Linc sat there silently for a moment. “I’m sorry.”
“No? Do you want to make a different offer or are you done with it?”
“Chance, I’m sorry for last night.”
Chance wasn’t having this conversation, especially here and now. “This is my place of business. Tell me what you want to do about this property, then get the hell out and never come back in. Until I’m gone, that is.”
Linc’s jaw set. He moved forward in the chair and leaned across Chance’s very neat desk, leaving construction dust on Chance’s files.
Chance sat back, trying to get as far back from the man as possible.
“Don’t go.”
Chance brushed some of Linc’s dust away with the back of his hand. “No reason to stay.”
“I said I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you.”
“Make it up to me?” Fury flooded into Chance. He was seething, shaking, and ready to kick Linc’s ass, no matter how big the asshole was. “You crashed into my life like a bull in a china shop, pried into the deepest, darkest places inside me, fucked me raw, and then couldn’t run away fast enough when it was all over. Just how do you plan to make that right?”
“I was scared.”
Chance was shocked by the statement. Here was this big, large man—and he was scared? Even though the emotion was so relatable, Chance just couldn’t see Linc feeling afraid of anything. “Scared? Really? You can’t make up some shit better than that?”
“You’re not other men. Other men are just fun. I screw them, and it’s all about a night of rough fucking and fun and no strings attached. It’s just sex and there’s no emotions connected to it. Last night, there were strings and it scared the fuck outta me. I didn’t know how to deal with that.”
Chance didn’t know how to deal with that statement. Some of the anger fled from him, but just a little. He was still royally pissed off.
“You know how I said you were brave, braver than me?”
Chance nodded.
“It was more than a little admiration for you being brave. I was attracted to you and that scared the shit out of me back then. I avoided you because I wanted you. Then I’d avoided you so long, it became habit. You were this unattainable man who I’d moved completely off my map. When I finally got some sense knocked into me and realized I didn’t have to ignore you anymore, I did with you what I do with other men. It was just about sex and no strings, but the strings were already there.”
All the air went out of Chance, along with the anger. He sat there feeling numb. He couldn’t find any joy in the words, not after last night’s catastrophe, yet he couldn’t feel angry, either. It had happened. Nothing could change it.
“Let me make it up to you,” Linc said after a minute of silence.
Chance’s chest hurt. He could barely breathe. “I don’t think there’s any way to fix this. We just have to move past it.”
Linc’s face looked tortured. “I can fix this. It’s what I do. I take pieces of shit and make them better.”
“Linc, look, you’re just in a different place than I am. You want fun and no strings. I don’t, at least the no strings part. At least now I can live without the regret of never spending a night with you. I went there, did that, and it wasn’t for me. I’ll be moving soon, so we can just chalk this up to being in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“Don’t go. We can work this out.”
“If it’s this much of a mess before it became a thing, Linc, I think it’s just not meant to be.” It killed Chance to say that, but he needed to stay strong. There was no good to come of this—last night was proof.
Linc stared at him for another moment before rising to his feet. “How long before you leave?”
“I’ll be working in L.A. a few days a week and a couple here for the next couple of months and then I’ll be there full time.”
“Two months? Okay—then I have two months to get you to change your mind.”
Chance shook his head. “No, you don’t. The deal is done. I go sign the contracts tomorrow.”
Linc leaned over the desk. “Better not sign. Tell them you need a trial period. Because I am going to get you to change your mind.”
Linc walked out, leaving Chance alone once more.
Chance had no idea what Linc thought he could do, but there was nothing that could stop him now.
Especially after learning what he just had.
Dammit, he still didn’t tell me what he needed to do with that deal. Chance turned to his computer and sent a new email to Linc, demanding an answer.
Come to my house tonight after work and I’ll let you know my answer.
-L
Linc glanced over the message one more time before hitting send. A car horn honked behind him as the light had apparently turned green. He looked both ways and then hit the gas, knowing full well he shouldn’t be emaili
ng on his phone while in his truck.
The phone buzzed at his side, and he couldn’t help himself. He pulled over and grabbed the thing.
Not happening. Email me your answer.
-C
Linc chuckled before penning a new response.
Either come over or I’ll say forget it and you’ll lose your commission.
-L
Linc watched his screen as cars whizzed past him. He could almost feel Chance’s outrage through the phone.
You mean the commission on a 23K house? Oh, no! There goes junior’s college fund.
-C
Linc laughed out loud. And then he quieted. He’d miss out on moments like this if he couldn’t sway Chance to forgive him.
Come on, you know you want to come. I’ll be eating more humble pie.
-L
P.S – You don’t have a junior
Linc looked down at the screen one more time before he hit send. You don’t have a junior. Linc’s gaze looked over the line one more time. Not yet.
Wow, where did that thought come from? Suddenly, the vision of Chance holding a baby in his arms, in a nursery Linc had built, came to mind.
Whoa, what the fuck? Babies? No.
Gay men started families all the time. They adopted, or had surrogates. It happened all the time. It wasn’t that far out of possibility. Linc rebuilt these old homes and made them beautiful—for families to enjoy. The thought had crossed his mind here and there, especially after selling a house and seeing a happy family moving in, the kids playing in the yards, that maybe, just maybe, one day he’d rebuild a house for his family.
But never had he imagined a partner in that house.
Until now.
He could see Chance as his other half.
And that scared the hell out of him. But if he ran, then Chance left for L.A. and they’d never find out what was possible.
One day I might.
And this house is your deal, not mine. I could care less what you do with it.
-C