Ree closed the door without another word.
"He's attracted to you, you know," Ree said after he hugged me and made sure I was okay.
"Who, Ethan?" That was a weird thought.
"My god, Morgue, you're sweet, but you can sure be blind," Dess commented, guzzling down a can of diet soda. Maybe that was her secret—she used diet products. Nah. That couldn't be all there was to it. She leaned over where Ree stood with me, telling him, "She used to think you and I were married."
Ree looked at me in shock. "Really, Baby?" he asked me, laughing quietly in a way that made me realize he thought my innocence was cute.
"Well, I thought-"
"You didn't notice how much she and I look alike, or even that Dess is gay?"
"Uh, no."
He smiled and kissed my forehead. It was my turn to have a red face, but it helped ease the tension of all the insanity I'd just witnessed.
"Anyway," Ree continued, "Ethan is very much attracted to you. I could tell when I first met him. I think that's why he didn't want to say very much at first. He was embarrassed to discuss this in front of you."
"He spies on me and he then is embarrassed to talk in front of me?" I asked incredulously. Ethan wasn't exactly an impressive man, so it was easy to overlook him.
"Men think a little differently from women," Ree explained patiently. "Even though you are not returning his affections, in his mind, you're the closest thing to a girlfriend that he has, and he didn't want to be stripped of his masculinity by responding to any of my forceful questions."
"Can the psycho-babble." Dess gave him a dirty look. "Not a day goes by that I don't regret you taking that crap in college." To me she said, "So who else could possibly be making Ethan watch you and report back to them?"
Ree and I looked at each other. We both knew.
My parents.
How else could my mother immediately know that I got fired from work or that I was in the hospital because I slit my wrists? She had Ethan following my every move. He probably hung out at the craft store often. Realistically, I wouldn't have always known if he'd been there, because my usual post had been at the table in the middle of the store where I cut fabric and ribbons for the customers. He could very well hang out constantly inside the store and I'd never know. Maybe he was there the day Anny called me and he overheard it all. That must have been how the news got to my mother so fast.
I recalled thinking days ago about how I wished I could exist without my life being center stage, a statement that was more accurate than I'd originally believed.
I sighed. "What a day. I'm so tired." I sat in the corner of the L-shaped couch and rested my head against the backing.
The twins followed suit, Ree sitting next to me and Dess pulling her ottoman back to its original place. My mind was still on the powers I'd just witnessed. "Did you guys always know about Ree's—what did you call it? Ice power?"
"Ice Touch. Yeah, we always knew. Trust me, it was a very handy power to have in L.A. Helped us survive the hundred-degree temperatures." Dess whipped out the remote and began channel-surfing.
"Well, why didn't you tell me about that, Ree?" I was hurt that there was so much about him I didn't know.
Ree realized how I was feeling and immediately addressed my concerns. "I didn't intend to keep it from you, Baby. You've got to understand—there are a lot of details about me you aren't aware of. Some of them are hidden for your own safety, and other things you don't know about just because I haven't thought of telling you yet. Please don't take it personally," he pleaded, his eyes imploring. "I don't think about these things when I'm with you. I've searched for you my whole life, and now that I've found you, I just want to be with you and enjoy our time together. You understand that, don't you?"
Why did he have to be so incredibly adorable and perfect? It would have been so much easier to be mad at him if he weren't. Damn him.
I managed a smile. "Yes, I understand." I wasn't exactly thrilled about any information being purposely kept from me, but I'd tackle this issue again later.
"Another thing about angels is that they don't feel temperature," Dess went on. "That's why Rios never uses a jacket."
I furrowed my brow. "Wait a minute. So when you sent us to go buy a jacket-"
"You needed to get out of the house, and I needed some time alone."
I laughed and remembered our conversation about Ree in the hospital, the way she looked at me after I asked if he were available. She probably made her plan to set us up right then and there. "So your Ice Touch prevents you from feeling temperature?" I asked Ree, avoiding the subject of Dess' ruse.
He shrugged. "I do feel temperature, but it doesn't bother me. I think all the Worthy are like that. Probably the Melted, too, now that I think about it. They have a similar power; theirs are just the polar opposite of ours. Earth's weather doesn't affect us, but our enemy's power does. A lot."
I thought for a minute about all the times Adim and I went out in the rain and in the cold. He'd never worn a jacket, only succumbing when I forced it on him. I also thought back to all the times when we'd watch a sci-fi or horror movie, and as we walked back to the parking lot afterwards, he'd usually comment on how unrealistic it was. "Demons don't have horns," he'd say. "At least not all of them."
I smacked myself on the head. Now that I knew the truth about Adim, it was so, so obvious. "There's so much about this stuff I don't know. And you," I said, turning to Dess. "You said you needed my help to figure out who you were."
"That was the truth. I did. Sure, we knew about the Worthy because of Rios, but we didn't know very much about the Slates. At least, I didn't know," she added, looking at Ree pointedly. "He didn't have a lot of information about them because they're not part of the good-and-evil system, or the superhero-and-villain system—whatever we're supposed to call it. And Morgue, you did help me," she added. "With your help, I was able to focus and bring out my former self. I never could have done this without you." She gestured toward the spot Adim had been laying.
"What? When did I help you?"
"You don't remember? I had a dream last night—or was it this morning?—that you were in my mind, and you had built an amazing mind-room for me. It organized all my thoughts so I could get to my buried memories much easier."
I laughed to myself. "I thought I was practicing making mind-rooms for people," I mused. "I didn't know I'd actually traveled to your mind and helped build a room for your memories."
"Oh, you did. And it's incredible. Thanks, Morgue."
Ree put his arm around me, a silent congratulations passing in the air between us. I looked back at him and gave him a weak, self-conscious smile.
The three of us sat quietly for a while, our minds full with the complexity of today's events. When no one could think of anything new to say, we turned our attention toward the TV.
Ree and I had been watching TV when the whole fiasco with Ethan breaking in had occurred. So much time had passed that there was a different program on TV, and I'd never seen it before and so I sat and watched it scornfully. Finally, during a commercial break, Ree turned to me and looked at me, searching my eyes. We sat there for a moment, regarding each other with unspoken longing. Finally, he smiled back and kissed my forehead.
He sat back and looked at his sister. "Dess, would you do me a favor?"
"What up, Chuck?" she said automatically, eyes still focused on the TV.
"Do you remember what I told you a while ago about fading?"
She made us wait while she stared off into space for a while, frowning. Then she sighed. "I have been known to memorize a few things in my day. Let's see. Fading is the procedure by which a Worthy angel falls. This is always attributed to said subject becoming afflicted with one of the seven original sins."
"That's interesting," I interjected. "So…Fading is pretty much like falling, in the 'fallen angel' sense, right? But it applies to Worthy angels?"
Ree nodded easily.
I looked at Dess, who
wore a curious expression as she stared at her twin. I looked back at Ree. "You must have already known this, because it had to have been you who told her the definition in the first place," I accused. "So… why did you ask her to recite it?"
Silence. Ree simply stared at me, frozen in a rare loss for words.
I looked at Dess again for help. She looked like she was beginning to understand something, which annoyed me. I hated being left out of the loop, and it happened so often with me.
"Morgue?" Dess gently put an arm around my shoulders and peered at where Adim and Ethan had been standing. "I think my brother has the sin of wrath. He's a fading Worthy."
Chapter 17
"I'm not fading," Ree protested in a tone that clearly suggested he found the notion completely and utterly ridiculous.
"Rios, don't try it, dude. I know you. That was your way of telling Morgue that it's happening to you." Dess turned her body, still sitting on her ottoman but facing the TV, putting on some lame sitcom, possibly the very same one I'd tried to watch at the hospital. I had no idea how she could stand watching that crap.
"I was not telling Morgan that it was happening to me. I just thought it would be a nice term to know, in case we came across any other LGA's."
"Oh, yeah, you know, all those LGA's we come across. Why, if I had a dollar for every LGA I met, I'd be a… millionaire." She stopped and looked at Ree pointedly.
"All right, all right," Ree conceded. "This whole 'fading' thing was just a thought I had. I was just a little concerned for a short time, but I'm okay now. I'm being completely truthful here. I just want to have a good way to gauge it, in case by some fantastic turn of events, it does happen."
I tried to piece together everything I'd learned about Ree's angel status. "We all know you're not my Living Guardian Angel anymore because of the fact that we've met." After both of the twins nodded, I continued. "But you still have angel powers. I've seen it. Lord knows I've felt it." I shuddered, recalling his icy hand wrapped around my ankle. "Meeting me didn't take your powers away, but it removed our spiritual bond, right?"
He seemed to struggle with that question. "I'm not linked to you the same way I was before. I can't watch your life. I can't talk to you in your dreams."
"So, this is a separate issue, except for the fact that you may not be an angel anymore," I concluded.
He sighed. "Let's not waste time speculating about it, okay? I apologize for bringing it up. I suggest we simply purge it from our memory as if it never happened. If the both of you are so concerned about it, let's just go about this another way. There is a test for a fading Worthy angel."
"There's a way to tell if you're fading or not?"
"Enlighten us, ye keeper of secrets." Dess was turning to face us by now, propping her feet up on the couch, crossing her arms and glaring at her brother, obviously unhappy that so many things were hidden from her.
He took a deep breath, looking out the living room window with a pensive expression. "Supposedly, the most common way to discover if any Worthy soul has lost its light essence is to bring him or her around one of the damned, one of the God Generation demons. These creatures can sense each other, you see. They can sense any creature from Hell, and not just those who have incarnated as humans."
I wondered which creatures from Hell would be around us but not in human form. At this moment, I really, really didn't want to know. I said nothing and let Ree continue. Dess also stayed quiet for once and simply let her brother talk.
"If the demon recognizes this individual as one of their own, then he or she is most certainly faded," he went on. "The more faded they are, the stronger the evil essence is that surrounds him or her."
I remained where I was, respecting his space. "Ree, why did you ask us about fading, right at that moment? There had to have been a reason, and I'd really like to know what it is." Sensing his hesitation, I added, "You tell me how much you love me, and as much as I love hearing it, it would mean a lot more if you would back it up by being honest. I know you respect me, and I know you love me. So, tell me what's going on. Please."
He shifted his eyes back and forth for a moment, as if considering the circumstances of opening up to me. Finally he sighed and leaned against the window. "I don't want to worry you, Baby. My Ice Touch was a little different just now. It should have overpowered Adim and brought him to his knees, and I certainly shouldn't have had to do touch-ups to myself afterward. I should have subdued him swiftly, without Dess having to do it. Not that I'm not grateful, sis," he added hastily.
"Do you think that your fading has affected your powers?" I asked. That was certainly logical. It's a good thing Dess was able to unveil at that moment.
"If I am, indeed, fading. We don't know that yet, okay?"
He was obviously a bit touchy on the subject. "Okay, Ree. Okay." I changed the subject. "I noticed you've used the word 'demon' and 'damned' a lot in these definitions. Why not just say Melted?"
Ree shook his head pensively. "Most of the definitions I recite to you have been written by someone Worthy or, at least, someone from The Light. Melted is a term coined by Hell. Although we do use the term for convenience, it's not an accurate statement on our part. Our view of them goes far beyond them being 'Melted' or just a part of evil. We see them as being damned."
A strange feeling began to peek out from somewhere inside me. After a moment, I realized that I was annoyed by Ree's words. They were judging people as a group, without getting to know any of them first? "You see them all as being damned? Isn't that a little unfair?" I crossed my arms in front of my chest.
He searched my eyes as he answered. "Baby, that's what they are, and they admit it. We're talking about beings who purposely and knowingly turned their backs on The Light. Why shouldn't they be damned?"
It seemed to make sense, but I couldn't shake the feeling that there was an element missing in Ree's assumption. I chose to drop the subject for now since neither one of us were apparently going to change our minds. "Another thing—it says we have to bring you around one of the Melted before we'd know for sure if you were faded?"
Ree sighed. "I guess we have to track down Adim. He didn't seem to sense a demonic energy about me when he was here, but he was pretty distracted by wanting to fight me. Plus, even if he had sensed an evil essence around me at first, it was probably immediately dismissed when I gave him the Ice Touch. Or, as a second option, we can go to the hospital and find that nurse. Those are the only Melted that we're aware of in this area. If they suddenly think I'm a demon too, then we have our answer.
"But I still have a direct connection to The Light. I feel it within me, and I'm fine." He stopped and looked in my eyes for emphasis.
I played with my pontytailed hair to distract myself, not knowing how to respond to that.
Dess turned her head to face us and asked, "So, what you're explaining to the both of us, Rios, is that if you really do fade completely, you'll become a choop with an evil-feeling energy? Or would you still be considered some type of angel?"
I didn't even know she was still listening. A commercial came on, promising good times to anyone who called their 'party line.' Dess was clearly distracted by a scantily-dressed woman practically soul-kissing a telephone, begging everybody to call her.
I was beginning to learn that my new best friend was a multi-tasker.
I turned to face the gorgeousness of his perfect, light brown face. "Good question."
He wore a semi-exasperated expression and watched TV absentmindedly. I said nothing, giving him a minute to collect his thoughts. Just when I became so impatient that I wanted to scream out, "Well?!" he started speaking again.
"More is expected of LGAs because of the fact that they are angels, Guardian Angels, to be precise. Our main purpose is to inspire and protect our charges. Obviously, a big part of that is to help lead our charges back to The Light if they have a crisis of faith, and anytime we can, we help anybody come back to The Light. Case in point: The LGA current objectives. We are ex
pected to try to convert the Slates"—here he glanced at Dess briefly—"to our side. We are expected to be more loyal to The Light than almost anyone else. An LGA fading is a big deal. More specifically, it is considered a great disappointment and failure. Imagine being cradled by the power of The Light, then absurdly turning your back on it, after having experienced the happiness and purity it brings." He paused and sighed. "The whole point of being an ordinary human, in our view, is to choose what side to be on, where you would like to spend Eternity. If you were an angel who felt the kiss of The Light and have since refused it, you have obviously chosen your side."
"Wait just a fucking minute," Dess interjected, turning her body to face Ree, "You insinuated a minute ago that a fading LGA's energy is similar to that of the Melted. But what you're telling us now is that a faded Worthy will actually become a demon?"
He faced me, a near-apologetic look in his eyes. "It's happened before," he said somberly.
"Really? Tell us about it, Ree." I leaned forward with interest.
"It's not important."
"The hell it isn't," Dess said without missing a beat.
He remained silent and looked at the TV, his eyes searching, as if the fellow introducing the new, improved quilted toilet paper would somehow help Ree find the right words.
"So, you're not gonna tell us, Rios? Gonna keep it all to yourself, as usual, right?" Dess challenged, her tone changing and mood getting heated.
"No, no. That's not it. It's just that it would require a lot more discussion and would lead to all sorts of things, and this is not the right time for that. We have other things to consider at this moment, and we need to remain focused. Later, when we have more free time, I'll tell the both of you anything and everything you could ever hope to know. Do we have ourselves a deal?"
I considered for a moment, and then nodded. "Sure, Ree. Sounds fair."
Dess only grunted and continued watching TV. Ree and I moved around a little on the couch to get comfortable, and we sat there, his arm around my shoulders while he and I observed the reality show without really watching. Suddenly, I felt his body stiffen a little, as if he thought of something he wanted to say to me.
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