by Mari Carr
Asher saw Owen’s gaze drift over to Fiona, and he realized there was still a lot to say.
“We will be, Mr. Collins,” Teddy said.
“Now, now. What did I say about that? It’s Pat, my boy. Why don’t you and I have a drink at the bar and get to know each other? Leave these two to sort out the particulars.”
Teddy smiled, clearly pleased by the invite. “Finally. A hot Collins man offering to buy me a drink and show me a good time. You two clowns take your time. I’m in good hands.”
Patrick laughed loudly. “There he is. Everyone kept swearing you were a hoot, but…” The rest of Patrick’s words were lost to Asher as the two men walked away.
He and Owen stared at each other a full minute before Asher broke the standoff.
“What the hell, man?”
Owen ran his hand through his hair, a sure sign he was nervous. “I haven’t been honest with you. Or Fee. Or Teddy. Hell…I haven’t been honest with myself.”
“So, this thing between you and Teddy…I’m not losing my mind, right? It wasn’t always there?”
Owen shook his head. “My feelings were. But no, I didn’t come clean to him until after the audition on Tuesday.”
“What did he say?”
Owen grinned. “You know Teddy. He made some joke about preferring you, but being okay with settling for me. Then he kissed me, and I knew that joke didn’t hold a bit of truth.”
“He was always in love with you too.” Asher started thinking back over the last year or two, remembering the signs. So many times, Asher had thought Owen was jealous of Teddy’s active love life, when in reality, he was jealous of Teddy’s lovers.
“So, all the Ashleys and Brittanys and…”
“Just dates. No sex. They liked being seen with a TV star. I was all talk.”
“What about our senior year? You got drunk and said Fiona was the only woman you’d ever love.”
“I meant that. It’s true. I do love her. But I’m not in love with her. I wanted to tell you, man, but…”
“Why now, Owen?”
Owen paused, and Asher could tell it was a question he’d expected, anticipated. “I’m trying to make it in Hollywood, Ash, trying to make my mark as a leading man, the heartthrob.”
Asher understood that. Knew how much Owen loved acting, loved his life as a TV star and how he longed to go further, to make an even bigger mark. “So what changed that? Because Teddy just outted you to the whole cast and crew.”
“We’d already talked about it. We were going to tell you and Fiona first and then…just let it filter out the rest of the way. I’m not hiding anymore. I can’t.”
“Doesn’t really answer my question. Why did you agree to be part of a threesome with me and Fee if—”
“I’m so sorry about that, Ash. I really am. I wouldn’t have done that if you hadn’t…”
Asher recalled that night after karaoke. “I forced your hand.”
“It’s going to sound so fucked up, but I kept thinking…if I can’t have the best friend I really want, what would be so wrong about being with the other two? I never lied. The three of you are my family. You’re all I have. I’d do anything to keep us together, to make sure…”
Owen’s words kept fading. Teddy was right. Owen struggled to express his feelings, but tonight, right now, he was saying more than Asher had ever heard, ever realized. He didn’t have to finish the sentences.
“We’re solid, Owen. Always have been. Always will be.”
“You and Fiona are perfect together.”
Asher nodded, praying Fiona felt the same way, that she would be okay without the package deal.
Then Owen rubbed his chin, lifting his shoulder in a way that screamed guilt. “Hope you don’t mind, but I was telling Teddy about last weekend. He was hoping you could teach me some of that alpha-male stuff.”
Asher rolled his eyes even as he laughed. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Owen, but those lessons would probably be more successful if I gave them to Teddy.”
Owen’s eyes widened. “Oh! Yeah. I could get on board with that.”
Owen glanced toward Fiona, and Asher followed his gaze. She was still talking to her parents, probably trying to explain… Jesus. Asher didn’t have a clue what she was telling them.
“You mind if I talk to Fee alone for a couple of minutes?” Owen asked. “I’d like a chance to apologize.”
Asher put his hand on Owen’s shoulder. “Sure thing. I’ll go hold up the bar with Teddy and Pat.”
Fiona looked over as Asher went to join Pop Pop and Teddy at the bar. Owen gave her a sheepish grin and she closed her eyes, unable to hide her own smile. She excused herself. “I need to go talk to the guys, Mom.”
Mom hugged her. “That really was quite a show.”
She laughed at her mom’s joke, hugged her dad and said good night, watching as they left the pub to head back for the bus, hand in hand.
“Can we find somewhere quiet to talk for a few minutes?” Owen asked, walking over to her.
She nodded and pointed to a booth on Sunday’s Side. While there were quite a few people still breaking down the makeshift set on the pub side, the restaurant was relatively quiet.
The past few days she’d suffered a never-ending mix of exhaustion and anxiety culminating into…Jesus…whatever tonight was. She still hadn’t quite wrapped her head around Owen and Teddy as a couple. That was going to take some time.
Owen followed her into the booth, sharing the same seat.
She opened her mouth to speak, to ask him what the hell was going on, but he beat her to the punch.
“I think we were right to break it off the first time.”
“I know.”
Owen didn’t seem surprised by her admission, which made her wonder if Asher would be. She’d been running on fumes for days, and the things that had been bothering her seemed less likely now than they had a few hours ago. Hell, the last year or so suddenly seemed clearer.
Owen picked up a napkin from the table, fiddling with it nervously. “I should never have agreed to go to your bedroom the night of that party. Time has a way of making you forget things. I don’t think either of us intended to break things off that night at school. The whole thing just fell apart in a flash of red-hot anger. It was a big fight, followed by a couple quiet weeks and then, boom, we were friends again. And our friendship was better after the breakup because the couple stuff didn’t work for us. The friendship was stronger than the relationship.”
“It was,” she whispered.
“So, we let the love we feel for each other as friends overshadow the truth—that we just didn’t work together as a couple.”
She nodded, closing her eyes against the tears forming. While his words matched everything she felt, that didn’t mean she didn’t feel sad hearing them.
“If you knew that, why did you agree to the threesome?”
Owen ran his hand through his hair. “Asher sort of backed me into a corner after karaoke, telling you that he wanted you, and that I did too. It’s not that I don’t love you, Fee. God. You’re the only girl I’ve ever loved. I mean that. With all my heart. And, well, if I was ever going to go for a ménage, there’s no question I’d want it to be with Asher and—”
“Teddy.” She giggled. All this time, she’d been worried about hurting his feelings, while he’d been trying to spare hers.
Owen laughed, then nodded. “Sorry.”
“So much for being the center of your universe.”
He gave her a serious look. “Do you want to be?”
She shook her head. “No.”
“Because you know you’re the center of Asher’s. And he’s the center of yours.”
Owen wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and she curled into him, sighing.
She closed her eyes, enjoying the closeness they still shared after fearing it would be lost.
“You and Asher are good together. I never really wondered about it because Brock was always there, but these
past few days…I started thinking about things.”
“What do you mean?”
“You always stuck with Brock because of the big gestures, right? And it never worked out.”
She nodded. “Right.”
“Because Brock couldn’t do the little things, the things that actually add up to big. Asher does those for you. All the time. He stops at Starbucks every damn morning to get your favorite coffee, even though he doesn’t drink the pricy stuff. Idiot is happy with the cheap shit in Al’s coffeepot that’s strong enough to walk out of the studio itself.”
She crinkled her nose and nodded in agreement.
Owen continued, “We had to stop by your apartment on the way to the airport for your sweater, because you mentioned Baltimore was chilly and warned us to pack better than you had. Hell, Asher even knew which one was your favorite sweater. I swear to God, I’ve never seen that thing he brought you.”
Fiona rolled her eyes. “I wear it every damn day.”
“See?” he said, as if she’d merely proven his point. “Plus, he always fixed all the shit in your apartment when Brock was out of town.”
Fiona considered that, then added, “When Brock was in town too.”
Owen shook his head, looking at her like she was a fool. And he was right. The answer was obvious, and it had been in front of her eyes all this time.
But she’d never admitted she was wrong easily. “In my defense, he was in a relationship until New Year’s.”
Owen snorted. “That thing between him and Christina was never a relationship. It was sex, pure and simple. Really kinky, hot sex, but sex just the same.”
“Remind me to call her when we get back to Cali and thank her. She’s one hell of a teacher.”
“You’re not kidding. Damn. I might call her too.” Owen pulled his arm away, and then apparently missed touching her, because he reached for her hand as he propped his feet on the bench seat on the other side.
“So…you and Teddy?” she asked.
Owen’s smile lit up his whole face the second she said Teddy’s name. “Watching you and Asher together sort of…”
“What?” she prompted.
“Shook something loose in me. Not sure I know how to explain it.”
When several minutes passed, she understood he really couldn’t find the words to describe his feelings.
Finally, he said, “There’s something to be said for falling in love with your best friend. You and Asher did that.”
“And you wanted the same?”
“I was already there. I’ve been in love with Teddy for a while now. I just…didn’t know how to admit it. To him. To myself.”
“The other night, when we were dancing…you had a…” She looked down, gesturing without words at his cock.
Owen actually flushed. “I got a little hot and bothered watching Teddy doing that bump and grind with the bonbon. Had to use you as a shield. Sorry about that.”
“And that kiss under the mistletoe at Christmas?”
“Well,” Owen rubbed his jaw guiltily. “I owe you an apology for that too. Teddy had spent the whole morning talking about his hookup the night before, and it got under my skin. I was trying to make him jealous.”
Fiona was always amazed how two people could view the exact same moment in completely opposite ways. Perspective was a playful bitch who always got the last laugh.
“These past few days, I thought you were happy because of the audition. It had nothing to do with that, did it?”
Owen shook his head. “Don’t get me wrong. It went well, and I think I have a really good shot at the role, but no…I was happy because I came out to Teddy. Told him I loved him, and he said it back.”
Fiona gave in to her exhaustion and the emotions and let the tears fall. “I’m so happy for you. For both of you.” She swiped at her eyes.
Owen seemed to need more convincing. “So those are good tears?”
She nodded. “The best.”
“Did I mess things up for you and Ash?”
“No,” Fiona rushed to reassure him, hoping she was telling him the truth. Even if it may be a lie, she wasn’t going to let Owen spend one second worrying about it. What happened next was up to her and Asher.
Colm walked over to their booth. “Hey, have either of you seen Sunnie?”
Fiona shook her head. “No. Not since the taping. Why?”
Colm gave her a shit-eating grin as he glanced at Owen. “She owes me twenty bucks. I won that bet. My money was on Asher.” He walked toward the kitchen, still on the hunt.
Fiona laughed, but didn’t have time to explain to a confused Owen before Asher peeked around the doorway and spotted them in the booth. “Everything good?”
They nodded and Owen stood, helping her out. He held out his arms and she stepped into his embrace.
“I love you, Fee.”
“I love you too, Owen.”
He gave her one of his sweet, gentle, friendly kisses, and then he walked back to the pub in search of Teddy, slapping Asher on the back as he went by.
“I think you and I should have a talk,” Asher said.
Fiona nodded. This talk was four days overdue.
“Okay, but before we head out…Happy Clam wants to know if she’s going to be a part of this discussion.”
Asher laughed. “I can talk to her first if you think it would help.”
Fiona blew out a relieved breath. As far as she was concerned, they’d just had their talk. “She’s kind of a needy bitch that way.”
He shook his head. “How long are you going to make me talk about your vagina in third person?”
“You two heading out?”
Fiona looked over her shoulder, delighted when Pop Pop joined them. She gave him a hug. “Told you you’d steal the show.”
“Ah, lass,” Pop Pop said, still beaming, “I have to thank the two of you for that. Never in all my life thought I’d have an opportunity to be on a TV show. Sunday would have loved it. Twenty dollars says she would have wanted to be one of those extras up there singing karaoke in the background, and then you would have seen someone steal the show. Your mother got her beautiful voice from Sunday.”
Fiona smiled when Pop Pop mentioned the grandmother she’d never met. It occurred to her that while Grandma Sunday died before she was born, she’d always felt like a real person, like someone Fiona knew, simply because Pop Pop kept her alive with his memories. “I would have loved to hear that.”
Pop Pop smiled wistfully, then realized they’d been on their way out. “Oh dear. I’m keeping you two, aren’t I? Going back to the hotel tonight, my fair Fiona?”
She nodded.
“It looks like you both got what you wanted in the end. I had a feeling things might turn out okay. I’ll leave you to the fun stuff then.” With that, he turned to join Riley, who was waiting to drive him home. Like Pop Pop, Aunt Riley was still grinning from ear to ear, exhilarated by the crazy night.
Fiona gave Asher a curious look. “Both of us?”
“Come on. Maybe I should talk to you before Happy Clam.”
14
Asher grasped Fiona’s hand and led her out of Pat’s Pub. For a split second, he considered guiding her toward the waterfront, thinking they’d stand a better chance of talking if they weren’t within five feet of a bed. Then he changed his mind. He knew what he wanted to say, and he knew where he wanted to be when he said it. And it was in the damn bed.
“That was quite a night,” he started. “Sort of feels like life imitated art there. The Anything Goes theme slipping off the page and the stage and into reality.”
“You can say that again. I can’t believe Brock showed up. Or that he wore that stupid bear costume. I had to beg to get him to be Danny Zuko to my Sandy one year for Halloween. All he had to do was cuff his damn jeans and wear a leather coat. You would have thought I’d asked him to shave his head and walk around naked.”
Asher wished he was at a place where he could laugh about Brock’s big gesture,
but he wasn’t there yet. “When I saw those pictures of the two of you flashing on every TV in the place…”
Fiona tugged his hand to stop him in place. He turned to face her, taking her other hand in his as she said, “Ancient history.”
“Two months ago isn’t that ancient.”
“It feels like a million years ago to me. Brock doesn’t exist in my world anymore. I swear.”
“He proposed, Fee. You said you wanted to get married just a week ago.”
She huffed out an exasperated breath that told him she found his comment completely ridiculous. It was a very comforting sound. “Not to him! I think you’re missing the most important part of the whole night. The last big gesture came…”
“And you resisted.”
She smiled. “Big gestures aren’t where it’s at.”
Asher wrapped his arm around her shoulders and they started walking toward the hotel again. “Out of vogue, huh?”
“Totally.”
“What’s in then?” he said, enjoying their easy banter.
“Hopefully Biggus Dickus in about,” she reached for her phone to check the time, “five minutes?”
He picked up the pace, the two of them laughing as they ran the last fifty feet to the hotel. Walking through the automatic doors, they fell into each other the second the elevator doors closed. Asher kissed her hard and hungrily, unwilling to give up the close proximity, her warmth or the sweet, clean scent of her hair even when the doors parted on their floor.
They walked, awkwardly, still kissing as he pushed her backwards down the hallway. Thank God it was the middle of the night and no one was around.
If felt amazing to have her lips on his again. He’d felt okay about where they stood on Thursday morning…the two of them still wandering around in a sexual haze, riding the last waves of complete satiation.
Then Owen came back, and too many days passed without touching or kissing or talking, and the doubts started to creep in. He wasn’t sure why. He’d kept his distance initially because he was hoping to grab some time alone with Owen to talk about their failed attempt at a ménage, but the right time never came. One day became two, and then three, and by then, he’d lost too much sleep to think clearly about anything, convinced he’d fucked up everything with Fiona irrevocably.