by Imogene Nix
“Jessa? My love, do not cry.” He slid a gentle hand through her hair. His touch so soft it almost broke her heart again. She looked out of the window to see the town of Parkes ahead. The time to say goodbye was almost here and heaven help her, she wasn’t sure she could be strong enough to do that.
They pulled into the road that would take them to the dish installation and to the Princess Gospah. She saw that the number of protestors had increased. Vehicles blocked the entrance and at the sight of them they chanted and shouted. Eggs and rotten tomatoes were thrown at the car and the placards waved at them.
Police formed human barriers allowing them to pass and she trembled. What would her life be like once she returned to reality? Would they picket where she was? Of course, she could take the easy way out. Stay with Galan and go to Hesparia. The option was there, and honestly, it was tempting. But she wasn’t a fool. He didn’t love her. He wanted her because of the bond formed by the Quickening and any chance of a child. It wasn’t enough though. She needed him to love her and want her for herself. And if that wasn’t there, she wouldn’t grovel for whatever scraps of affection might come her way. She had far too much dignity to settle for that, she told herself firmly.
Silent tears trickled down her face, burning her cold skin. She quickly dashed them away with unsteady hands, hoping he wouldn’t see them.
Jessa remonstrated with herself internally. She would complete the tasks she had taken on, preparing the lists of migrants for Hesparia, organise the berths. She’d had weeks to prepare herself for this. Once on board the Princess Gospah she would tell him.
They turned in, finally past the protestors and the vehicle stopped right beside the ship. She waited patiently as he told her to stay in the car. His people swarmed, collecting the baggage and carrying it to the Princess Gospah. Then with a tender smile he held out his hand for her. Feeling even more like a fraud, she accepted it and followed him to the eli-pad.
If Galan wasn’t mistaken, Jessa had something on her mind. And it wasn’t pleasant. But whatever it was, he’d bet it could be fixed soon enough. She followed him into his cabin and sat down on the bed, her face downcast. A knot formed in his belly.
“Galan… We really should talk.”
The undertone chilled him. He moved to the bed beside her. “What about?”
She sucked in a deep breath and he knew. Somehow his mind told him she was planning to leave. Without him.
“About us. This.” She waved her hand waved at the room. “Our situation… It’s not healthy for either of us.”
He formed fists with his hands. “I’m not sure why you’d even think that…” He was about to launch into all the reasons they were good together. The most important of them, being that he loved her. But he couldn’t tell her of the revelation that he’d had watching her on the plane as she slept. He didn’t think she was ready for that. Not yet. He didn’t want her to think he only wanted her for the child.
“I can’t stay, Galan. It isn’t right. I know you told them all that I was going to be your consort… But I can’t be.” She turned away, covering her face with her hands. A sob erupted and her shoulders shook as he watched.
Chills struck to the centre of his bones.
She didn’t love him. She wasn’t going to stay with him.
His heart shattered.
But he couldn’t give her up. Not without at least trying, so he placed a hand on her shoulder. “Jessa…I don’t…” He sucked air into his lungs. “I can’t let you go.” The strangled words hung in the air. He wouldn’t take them back, even if he wanted to. It was true. I can’t let her go.
“Galan…”
He pulled her back against him and she was still in his arms.
“Don’t make this harder.” Jessa turned and her eyes were pools of agony. “What we had was always going to be transitory. We never made any promises to each other. We never said we loved each other…” Her voice broke on the last words and he clutched her tighter.
Her words made him flinch. He wasn’t going to lose her. Not like this. If it meant pushing her, then he would damn his own ethics and morals. “Maybe I didn’t… but I do.” At his words, Jessa pulled away.
“Don’t patronise me!” She spat the words at him, anger warring with her pain.
“I’m not! I’ve loved you from the first time I saw you.”
She stopped dead. Her face lost every touch of angry colour so that only a pale visage remained. For an instant he thought she might faint.
Then she squared her shoulders. “You do not. You’re just saying the words to humour me. Fine, I might love you, but don’t cheapen it. Don’t ever cheapen my feelings!” She shouted and warmth flowed through him. The first since this conversation began and he wanted to shout his joy.
She loves me! Hot on that realisation came the thought that she didn’t believe him. How can I…? Even as he caught the thought, the answer was clear. “Wait! Just one moment. Be quiet and listen to me.”
Tear tracks glistened on her cheeks and his heart thudded. “I’ll prove it to you. Just give me a minute.” He scrubbed a shaking hand over his face. It was the most important thing he’d ever have to prove. “Gospah?” He called on the ship. The lights dimmed and the walls pulsed.
“Galan? Jessa? How can I be of service?” The tone was cautious. She’d been listening.
“Gospah? Tell Jessa what I am feeling.”
Jessa looked at him startled.
“Galan? I don’t usually…” The words were hesitant but he smiled.
“Go ahead. This is one time where your intervention in private matters is appreciated.”
“Galan feels happy, just as he always is, with you. When you came on-board he was concerned. When you told him you were leaving the aura was dejected. Once you told him you loved him, it lightened and warmed. Given the array of feelings, I deduce that he’s a man in love—in love with you, Jessa.”
She sat still, holding onto her arms tightly as if holding in the emotions. He waited patiently she scanned his face. “You can’t…” A single tear drop shook on her lashes. Then it released and slipped down her face. The emotions left his heart clenching. “You…” She stopped, placed a shaking hand over her lips. “You love me?”
He nodded. Waiting for her to see the truth. The one he had not long realised himself.
With a single sob, she threw herself into his embrace. “I love you too. But I thought… I thought it was the chance of a baby…”
He growled. “A baby with you would be the thing that would complete us. But what I want is so much more. I didn’t know really until the plane… But to spend my life time with you? To have you at my side as my consort is the one thing I want. The thing I need to fulfil me.” He pulled her into his arms. “I want forever with you, Jessa. Because I love you. You for you, not for what you can give me or my people. So if that thought is still there, banish it now.”
She wound her arms around him and he pulled away to slip a finger under her chin, lifting her mouth to his. Then he kissed her.
Jessa pulled back and she shook. After all her concerns and mistaken belief, now she knew the truth—that he loved her. So close. She’d come so close to throwing it all away because she thought she knew best. The thought nearly overcame her and her stomach clenched slightly before she allowed herself to savour her new found knowledge. Now here they were, on his bed. In his cabin. Together.
She wanted him. A burning ache started in her heart and travelled all the way down to her core.
“Gospah?” She waited and the walls pulsed in deep shades.
“Yes, Jessa?” She smiled as the subdued tones of the ship.
“Could you…umm…” Then she giggled. The thoughts that now echoed in her head were fairly lascivious. She certainly didn’t want Gospah there for the scenes she was about to enact with Galan. That is, if he was of the same mindset. She glanced at him and saw the growing understanding.
“Of course, Jessa. Excuse me, please, Galan.” The amu
sed tone died away and the walls glowed a dull red, letting them both know that she had withdrawn.
“Now then… Let me see… Where were we?” She slipped her hands around Galan’s waist. “Oh yes…” She leaned in and almost at his lips, whispered, “right about here.” And pressed herself to him. She placed her mouth against it, which opened and she thrust her tongue within his warm moist cavern.
She firmed her hands over his shoulders, glorying in the feel of him beneath her touch. His hands shook as he circled her waist. He gripped her with hard fingers. “Let me love you,” he whispered against her lips and the breath caressed the sensitive skin. His words became a drug, pulling at her senses and she closed her eyes just a little until her lids were at half-mast.
Slowly he brushed one hand up her side, letting it settle just beside the swell of her breast. Then he followed slowly with the other and she quivered beneath his careful movements. If only he knew exactly what each caress and glance did to her. How she burnt when he was near.
Jessa kept her fingers on his collar bone but moved slow circles and he moved into her touch, as if seeking more. “You are the most beautiful woman I know.” Galan brushed his thumbs up and down at the sides of her breasts and she trembled in reaction. Hot sparks of arousal exploded within her body.
His touch moved, sliding across her breasts and she cried out. He stopped and looked into her eyes, his concern clear. “Okay?”
“Just a bit sensitive at the moment.” She gasped the words.
He smiled warming her through at the gleam that entered his eyes. “And I’ve barely begun.” Gently, he lowered his head again. This time the kiss was like the brush of a butterfly’s wing, so very soft and tender.
She made to open her mouth but he pulled back. “Not yet.” He gently nipped his way down to her chin and nibbled, then continued the sensual journey up to the sensitive spot beneath one ear. “Tonight, I’m going to love you like no one ever has or ever will again.”
He flicked his tongue against sensitive flesh and she quivered in delight. “Galan, please.” She raised her hands to lock around his neck but he caught them, stilled them. Raised them above her head.
“Not tonight, Jessa. Tonight is the first night of our forever.” The meaning of his words made her teary.
“Oh, Galan…I nearly made the biggest mistake of my life. I…”
He stopped her words with another soft kiss.
“But you didn’t.” Galan placed his hands on the front of her blouse, and popped her buttons slowly while she watched his movements. Finally he pushed the material away, exposing the white bra that lay beneath. “So very beautiful.”
He traced the top band of her underwear and her breath hitched. She squirmed again, knew that at this rate, she’d explode before he even entered her. “Galan…” Her breathless entreaty was met with a seductive and low chuckle.
“Be patient.” He reached behind, deftly unfastened her and she hissed as the cool air caressed her sensitised globes. But this time he groaned and placed his hands over her. Flicked the distended nubs he found and she jerked in response as lightening flashed through her system.
He had barely touched her and already her body was over-stimulated. She pushed against his chest. “My turn.” But he stopped her, shaking his head.
“No. Tonight is for us, but I need to show you how much I care.” His face was tight and hard like granite and his eyes glittered with his need.
Jessa subsided and let him continue his intimate inspection. But each touch heated her system. Her core yearned with emptiness and she moaned as he moved his hands to the waistband of her pants.
He tugged at them and she moved her hips, letting him push them down her legs. She sat on the bed, in just her panties as she squeezed her knees together while excitement gripped tight. “Galan!” She called his name and this time he crooned to her.
“Jessa. Sweet beautiful Jessa. My heart and my love.” He brushed his fingers over her mound, hidden beneath the plain white cotton and she moved mindlessly. He slipped one finger beneath, parting the damp curls and dipped into her. She arched and panted.
“More, Galan. I need more!” Her broken cries mixed with the scent of musk that filled the air but he continued rubbing. Touching her. Slipping lightly within her hot damp core. The tension grew, her stomach clenched tightly and she locked her legs together as rapture overtook her. Her heart stuttered for an instant as she fell back on the bed.
He wrenched her underwear from her body, she dimly heard them tear and his muttered imprecations.
Jessa opened her eyes, smiling shyly at him. “So now it must be your turn? At least… when I get my breath back.” Then she closed her eyes.
Sounds of movement, the shucking of clothes, filled the air then he was there. Crawling across the bed, settling between her thighs. His mouth on her most sensitive flesh and she wantonly opened her legs to his invasion. His tongue flicked and again she jerked as her body settled into the now familiar carnal rhythm. She arched as he clung to the tender skin of her thighs. “More, Galan! More!”
He lifted his face, licking his lips. “You taste finer than the best wines.” Then he flowed up the bed to her, growling as he feasted on her mouth.
She could taste herself on his lips. She opened herself to his deeply erotic embrace even as he fitted himself at the entry to her core.
Then slowly, achingly slowly he slipped within. Each tiny movement heightened as he pinched at her nipples. She cried out and tried to arch into his touch, but he stayed her. “Slowly. Tonight. I. Promised. Slowly.” His voice cracked on the last word and even in the height of passion she was overcome. A single tear burnt its way down her cheek.
He stopped, holding himself still within her. “I’m hurting you?” His strangled voice hurt her soul.
“No, Galan. I’m crying because I’m happy.” She leaned into him. “Please. Don’t stop.” She kissed him and he moved, faster, as if unable to hold back any longer.
She met his urgent thrusts, let her tongue dance with his. The sound of their flesh moving against each other filled the air.
“Give me your everything, Jessa. Give me your heat.” His grip on her hips pulled her closer to him.
“More! Galan! Galan!” She called to him, knowing now, that his soul and hers were one. She craved release as the invisible tendrils within her wound higher and higher.
She gulped at the air as he assaulted her senses. Her body sought the cataclysmic release that neared. Jessa threw her head back and keened as the first ripples spread out from within her. Galan moved within her, faster and harder, his skin sheened with sweat, his teeth bared and muscles in his shoulders and neck corded.
“Now!” With a final brutal thrust, he climaxed with her, holding her tight while her internal walls milked him.
Finally lethargy filled her, as her muscles released and she slumped as did Galan. They lay there, still intimately entwined for long moments. They both panted from their exertions.
“I’m too heavy.” He moved with a grunt, slipping down beside her, pulling her into his arms. “This is what it will be like forever for us. I love you, Jessa.”
“Yes. Forever.” She whispered the word. She closed her eyes and she let sleep claim her.
* * * *
Jessa woke. Nausea assailing her and she surged up before bolting for the bathroom. She just made it, falling to her knees and retching.
She heard the thud of feet behind her, but her belly was violently upset. She could feel a touch on her shoulder as she hunched, her stomach expelling its contents. After long moments she sat back, weakly leaning against his legs.
“It will be better now.” He handed her a wet cloth.
She gratefully accepted it, wiping her mouth and with a sigh she closed her eyes. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what caused it.”
Slowly he pushed her hair from her sweaty face and she nuzzled at his hand. “Are you sure?”
Jessa’s eyes opened at his tone and the seed of a thou
ght intruded as her mind whirled… Tender breasts, uncertain emotions, nausea… “What do you mean?” She frowned, waiting for his answer.
Galan smiled. “Think, Jessa. You are ill, you complained of sore breasts. You tire quickly. They are all symptoms.”
Jessa gasped as he enumerated those that had occurred to her. “Pregnant? You think I’m pregnant?”
He nodded.
She gulped. If that was true, this would be the first child on Hesparia in many years.
“If you wish, we can ascertain if that is indeed what is making you ill.” His quiet words soothed the last of her fears. He helped her to stand.
She needed to know. “How soon can we find out?” Now she wanted to know. Yearned to find out if she was carrying his child.
“We can find out immediately. I will send for one of the healers.” He kissed her cheek and helped Jessa back to the bed. She lay down, still wrung out from the exertion but filled with excitement. Can it really be true? Can I be lucky enough to have Galan and a baby?
“Gospah? Could you request one of the healers to come to my cabin? He will require his diagnostic equipment.” He sat beside Jessa, the bed dipping slightly, rolling her towards him. He smiled and caressed her cheek.
“Of course, Galan. Should I give him details of the symptoms?” The walls flushed with pastel shades and Jessa nearly laughed, controlling the urge with some difficulty.
“Not at this time.”
They waited, only leaving the bed to slip into light robes, then the door opened and one of the healers entered with the diagnostic tool in his hand. She couldn’t remember his name but had met him during her time aboard before.
“Galan, you required my services?”
Galan smiled broadly. A hot tide burnt her cheeks. This is so embarrassing. But now that the idea was there, she wanted to know. Needed to know and desperately wanted it to be true.
Galan explained her symptoms and Jessa waited patiently as the healer sampled her blood, then peered into the tiny screen. A small smile crept over his face. He turned the screen for Galan to view.