I took pictures of the interior of the school and texted them to her on the way here. I know it’s making her jealous, but somehow that just makes me want to do it even more. I’m a horrible friend. I should lose my BFF badge for sure.
Me: It looks pretty, but when you strip it down to its foundation, it’s just a school. I have an ass ton of homework already and it’s only the first day.
Ana: You can do it! If anyone can handle Wilcox, it’s you. I am so proud of you.
A smile takes over my face. Having one faithful friend I know I can count on no matter what carries me through. Ana doesn’t even have to be here in the flesh to be my rock.
Me: You’re the best. Love you!
Ana: Love you too!
I lock my phone, turn to the right, and see Raven glaring at me. I shrug and she straightens her back to communicate I need to sit up. I groan and straighten up in my chair. I thought Jess was the one who was supposed to try to be my mom.
I turn back to the table and salivate over my unfinished lunch. I chow down my nachos in record time, not even acknowledging Raven when she clears her throat repeatedly. As I’m wiping my mouth and gulping down fruit juice, Chandler chuckles beside me.
“I’ve never seen anyone other than me finish a meal that quick,” she says.
I laugh with her. “I might look like a stick, but these legs are hollow.” I knock on my legs like I’m expecting a clunking sound to come from them. “You’re lucky to be able to eat as much as you want and not gain a pound. I don’t think I’m ever going to be thin.” Pain travels across her features.
“Hey…” I place my hand on her arm reassuringly. “You’re beautiful, Chandler. Don’t let anyone tell you different.” I meant that. Chandler could easily pass for a plus-size model. Her facial structure would be perfectly highlighted by some makeup.
Chandler’s face lights up like a kid on Christmas. It’s obvious she hasn’t heard those words around here much, which makes me sad. “You really mean that?”
“Of course. If I ever have a boyfriend again, I’m going to have to hide him from you.” I wink and both of us bust out laughing.
After lunch, Chandler and I drop off our trays together and she walks with me as I head to Physics class. Along the way, I tell her how excited I am to actually have a lab partner my age for the first time. Dad was always a great helper back in Kentucky, but I missed the camaraderie from learning alongside someone else. She tells me she met one of her closest friends in a science lab and gives me two thumbs up when she leaves me at the door.
Things are set up a little differently in the science classroom. Instead of mahogany desks, there are long tables with plain wooden chairs pulled up to them. This was the only class I didn’t get a seating assignment chart for. It’s nice to be able to choose my own seat for a change. I take a seat next to a pretty African-American girl whose hair is still twisted into tight beaded braids from summer. She greets me with a warm smile, and I return it.
I set my school-issued iPad on the table and look up just in time to see Gio taking the seat directly in front of me. I groan under my breath and roll my eyes. This is the first class I’ve had with him all day. I figured I couldn’t escape without just one.
Hopefully he won’t be sitting in front of me all year.
The teacher, Miss Dawson, comes to the front and calls out attendance. She gives a long, boring introduction speech to herself and the class. It sounds like she’s never done anything else in her life besides teach science. She announces she has our lab partners assigned and will expect us to sit with them for the rest of the year. My heart falls. The sliver of freedom I gripped so tightly a few minutes ago is being taken away.
A part of me hopes she’ll just say, “Whoever is sitting next to you right now is your lab partner,” but of course I’m not that lucky. The first thing out of her mouth is:
“Giovanni Abate and Madison Landers.”
Gio spins around to search the crowd for me, looking every bit as panicked and totally not okay with this as I am. We lock eyes, and he raises his dark eyebrows slightly. I can hear him in my head.
Say something, dammit!
I raise my hand, my voice trembling. I’ve never asked a question in a classroom before, unless you count Sunday school back at Ana’s church. “Uh, Miss Dawson?”
The prim blonde teacher purses her lips at me. “Yes?”
“Gio and I have sort of a…history. Is it possible for us to be reassigned to someone else?”
She shakes her head firmly. “These lab partners were assigned weeks ago. I’m not going to shuffle everyone around now. You’re just going to have to endure it.”
Gio and I eye each other again with dismay. He sighs, grumbles something in Italian, and turns his attention forward again. My head falls into my folded arms on my desk. I moan inwardly about my bad, bad luck until she finishes calling out lab partners. Then I have to get up and take a seat next to Giovanni Abate, who scoots away from me like I’m a poisonous snake.
It’s official. Between my past, the locker assignment, and the lab partner assignment, I can only assume one thing.
The universe hates me.
September 14
The First is the Worst
Well, I think it’s safe to say that my first day of high school was a total disaster. My awkwardness was at an all time high today, and having Gio pop up around every corner just made everything ten times worse. We have lockers across from each other and we were assigned to be Physics lab partners, so there’s no way in hell we’re going to avoid dealing with each other. He was obviously even more upset about it than I was. I have never seen anyone rush out of a classroom so fast. Once he was free, he bolted like a buck during hunting season.
I talked to Dad about it when I got back, and he comforted me and told me that the first day of school is always the worst. You don’t know what you’re doing, you’re nervous, and you can’t seem to find anything you need. He assured me that things will get better, and I definitely hope he’s right. I’ve got a massive stack of syllabi to read— yes, this high school uses actual syllabi—which seems like an omen for the rest of the year.
This is going to be hard. Like, a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I picked a doozy for my one and only high school experience. I hope Gio and I can learn to be civil to one another, because I really can’t afford to fail any assignments this year. Maybe this will be good for us, who knows? Maybe it will force us to get along and become friends. That would help everyone, because poor Cass and Steph haven’t been hanging out much lately because of us. We just need to find some neutral ground, and everything will be okay.
The only problem is, I’m not supposed to be “fraternizing” with Gio. That’s one of Raven’s school rules. What am I supposed to do? He’s my lab partner. I have no choice but to break this rule, unless he decides to do all the work himself because he doesn’t want to deal with me.
At least tomorrow I have a fun class to look forward to—Chorus. I’ve wanted to be in Chorus ever since I was a little girl. I know being in Chorus is a little out of character for me as an aspiring rock star, but singing in a group and harmonizing with others will be great classical training for me that will come in handy in the future if we ever decide to do any creative symphonic songs.
Dalton and Devon are in Chorus with me, which makes me even more certain it’s going to be my favorite class. I already consider those two family. We haven’t hung out much, but being in a band together makes Dalton an automatic friend for life, and Devon is just a nice girl. I’m glad things aren’t weird between us because of Gio.
Gotta get started on these syllabi now. I didn’t know I signed up for college instead of high school.
Ttyl,
Mads
When Raven drops me off at my locker the next day, my assistants aren’t waiting for me. In a way, I’m relieved. I don’t want them witnessing my reaction to seeing Gio again. I jiggle my combination lock open with only a little difficulty
and take out only what I need for the next two classes. The owner of the locker next to me leans against it as I search in the back of my locker for a highlighter and flashes me a flirty smirk. I size him up in a second.
Caramel brown hair, sapphire blue eyes, golden tan skin, and what I would describe as a soccer build. This guy is yummy, but not exactly my type. I smile and turn back to the task at hand, but he interrupts me.
“Well, aren’t you at least gonna ask me my name or something?” I turn back to face him and I’m met with an adorable teasing grin.
“Uh, sure.” I giggle nervously. “What’s your name?”
“Liam Wellington.” He acts as if I’m supposed to automatically know him based on his name, but I have to admit, I’m clueless. “You’re Madison Daley, right? Raven’s twin sister?”
“Yep, that’s me,” I say with a sigh. Everybody knows me as “Raven’s twin” or “Jacie’s daughter” now. It’s like I don’t even have an identity apart from them anymore.
He studies my face intently. “You do look slightly different from her.”
“Yeah, that’s my crooked chin. I busted my jaw back when I lived in Kentucky. Also, I still have my own boobs.” Heat creeps up my neck. I didn’t mean to blurt that last part out.
To my relief, Liam bursts into laughter. “Well, that would explain it. To be honest, I’ve always thought Raven’s obviously enhanced bust was a turnoff. You, on the other hand…” His gaze travels down my frame, and my stomach churns when his hungry eyes lock with mine again. “You’re breathtaking.”
That was a bold…maybe even brazen declaration of lust. I squirm beneath his gaze and turn back to my locker, grasping fruitlessly at the purple highlighter in the back corner. “Thanks,” I mumble.
Liam leans on the locker beside me and attaches his hand to the door behind my head, effectively cornering me. “You got a boyfriend?” he asks.
My cheeks burn as I zero in on my Trigonometry textbook. “No.”
“Have you been out to the soccer field yet?”
I turn to him with a raised eyebrow. “No…?”
“Well, if you’re not busy during lunch, maybe we could meet out there…you know, see the goals, the track…the bleachers…” There was an undertone there that I was supposed to get, but being clueless about social interactions, I have no idea what he’s getting at. “What are you saying?” I ask.
“I’m saying I want to take you under the bleachers,” he croons with a lopsided grin.
My mouth falls open and a nonsensical grunt comes out. “Does that mean what I think it means?” His smoldering gaze ignites with a blue blaze of passion. “I wanna be the first one here who gets to show you a good time.” Liam runs his fingers down the length of my sleeve. My muscles lock and freeze in my fear. I feel vulnerable standing here in this mid-thigh length skirt, especially since his gaze keeps dropping to my bare legs.
“She’s not like that, Wellington,” a familiar voice growls behind us. Liam and I jerk around to find Gio Abate standing tall and unwavering with a glowering scowl directed at Liam. In my mind, a white glow surrounds him and he’s perched on an equally handsome steed. He’s coming to my rescue. I knew he was the incarnation of Prince Charming.
“Madison Daley is not someone who screws guys she just met under the bleachers,” Gio asserts. “I suggest you look for your next conquest elsewhere.” Liam bellows with a derisive laugh. “She screwed you when you just met her, didn’t she?”
Gio hesitates, but then he shakes his head. “Actually no, she didn’t.”
“So how long did it take you to get her in bed?” Liam’s eyebrow curls upward with curiosity.
“We never got that far. She’s a virgin.”
Everyone within three feet of us falls silent in shock. I glance around in horror at all the people gaping at me and feel a sudden urge to vomit. I whirl around to face my locker, duck my head in as far as I can, and close my eyes tightly, hoping I’m in a dream.
Please, universe. Please tell me Giovanni Abate didn’t just out me as a virgin in front of all of Wilcox High School.
Liam laughs hysterically. “Virgin? No wonder she froze up like a nun at the mention of sex!” Some of the other guys join him in laughing at me, and their playful banter echoes off the walls of my locker.
“Madison Daley, the virgin.”
“I guess we all know who the good twin is now!”
“I think you mean the vir-twin.”
“No, no, I got it,” Liam shouts. “Virgin Madi!”
Tears scorch my eyes and my breath comes out in a shudder as they all start chanting, “Virgin Madi” around me and discuss who’s going to deflower me. I clench my jaw in anger. How dare they discuss my virginity like this? There’s only one person who’s responsible, and right now my anger at him is overshadowing every good feeling I ever had about him. I spin around to face Gio with daggers shooting from my eyes. His own eyes are glued open in horror. “You son of a bitch.” My hiss of disdain gets through to him. As I shove past him and speed walk down the hall, he follows me.
“Wait! Madison, wait!”
I dart through the crowd and lose him, speeding as fast as I can toward my homeroom. I need to get in a safe space, one where people haven’t heard my big news yet.
Of course it doesn’t take long at all for the news of my virginity to spread like wildfire. By the time I reach the end of my second school day, I’ve had thirty offers to go under the bleachers and shed my new nickname, “Virgin Madi,” for good. I turned each and every one of them down because I have self-respect and don’t need to prove anything to anyone, but of course, according to all the guys, I’m scared. Thanks to Giovanni Abate, my life at school is now a living hell. He wouldn’t even look me in the eye during Physics, probably because if looks could kill he would be dead ten times over.
Finally, Chorus class arrives, and I’m relieved to find Dalton, Devon, and Chandler all in their seats with very few people between them. I just needed to see familiar, nonjudgmental faces, and they all look happy to see me. I sit next to Devon, and Chandler moves to sit next to me. Dalton waves to me from the guys’ side of the room and returns to something he’s working on at his pull-down desk.
“Hey, are you okay?” Devon asks, her eyelids heavy with concern. Chandler is looking at me with the same expression of pity. I love them for caring about me, but I hate that look. It makes me feel like going to Santa Monica and jumping off the pier. “I’ll live,” I mutter. “Giovanni Abate might not be so lucky, though.”
Both of the girls snicker.
“You should tell everyone he has a tiny…” Chandler gestures to the crotch area, grinning. “That would even the score.”
“But they would all know I’m lying, remember? I didn’t…” Heat rises into my cheeks. “You know.”
Devon leans in and whispers, “You went out with him for several weeks, right? Don’t you know any embarrassing secrets about him from that?”
“Um…well, I did stomp him in Battlefield. And I also kicked him onto the ground the first time we made out.”
“That might work,” Chandler says. Just then, the teacher, Ms. Juarez, walks into the room. “We’ll talk more about it later.”
Ms. Juarez has shiny black hair curled up into a messy bun and big, long-lashed brown eyes. She’s somewhat petite and has a bright, warm smile. She shuffles in with arms full of binders, and Dalton jumps up to assist her.
“Thank you, Dalton,” Ms. Juarez says. “Give me just a few moments to set up, class.”
Her eyes catch mine and a flicker of confusion crosses her face before she turns back to organizing her binders. Devon and Chandler chatter over me while Ms. Juarez sets up for class. I can’t help but feel like sinking through the floor. Up until this moment, I forgot that most of these people think I sing horribly because of the drunk singing incident. I’m probably going to get kicked out before class even begins. Maybe this was a bad idea. I could probably sneak out of the room and get away with it, right?
After all, this class is optional.
I stand from my seat with my bag in hand and start to exit the room before Ms. Juarez calls out and stops me.
“Madison, where are you going?”
I whirl around and swallow against the lump of nerves that gathered in my throat. “I decided maybe I shouldn’t take this class after all.”
Her face falls. “Oh…that’s too bad. I was looking forward to having Grim’s daughter in my class.”
“Wait…you were?”
Jovial laughter bubbles up from deep in her throat.
“Of course! I was just confused—I don’t remember seeing you in auditions.”
“Oh, that’s because I was out of town. They said I’d still be welcome to come to the class and I could try out when I got here,” I explain.
“Well, by all means…” Ms. Juarez gestures to the baby grand piano in the corner with a bright smile. “Come to the piano with me, my dear.”
Dalton returns to his seat, leaving me alone at the front of the classroom with Ms. Juarez. My heart pounds and sweat pools on my palms. I’ve never tried out for anything like this before, and I’m sure a rejection is coming. This is Wilcox High School. They expect the best. I’m about to get an ego shattering letdown for sure.
Ms. Juarez pulls out the stool and lays her pretty French-manicured fingers on the immaculate black and white keys. “What songs do you know that can be played on the piano, sweetie?”
“Do you know “My Immortal” by Evanescence?” Ms. Juarez’s face lights up. “I love that song!”
I grin at her. I think I just found my favorite teacher.
She plays the intro and when I start singing, the entire classroom hushes to listen to me. I hear soft whispers, but much to my relief, no one’s laughing. I glance out at the crowd and catch Dalton’s gaze. He has a smug smirk on his face, like, I discovered her first, bitches. Devon and Chandler both tremble in their seats, looking like they’re biting back squeals. I see a couple of people taking videos on their phones. Taking videos. Hmm…
D.O.R.K. Series Box Set Page 30