“Good.” Breathing in his clean, musky scent, I giggle. “You’re a really sexy Thor, by the way.”
His low chuckle causes a warm wind to brush my face. “Thanks.”
I run my hand over the taut fabric that’s stretched over his equally taut chest. His head lowers toward mine, matching the draw I feel so strongly for him. I lift my face to stare into his daring green eyes, finding his charm far more irresistible than Gio’s. It’s pretty clear I chose the wrong guy at the beginning of this semester. I should have challenged Claire to a duel, kicked her ass, and claimed my prize three months ago.
We continue to lean toward each other, and I almost meet his lips, but in a moment of clarity I change my mind. Logan Caldwell is incredible, but I can’t do this tonight. It would be a bad start to something I’m hoping can last longer than my last failed relationship.
“I think I need some rest,” I whisper.
Logan purses his lips and nods. “I’ll leave you to it.”
I sit up to let him off the couch and then lie back down on the pillow. Logan goes back into his bedroom and comes back out with a lovely, soft, rain-smelling fleece blanket. He spreads it over me and tucks me in with a tender pat on the shoulder. I snuggle into the blanket and barely hear him whispering in my ear before I drift off to sleep.
“Sweet dreams, Wonder Woman.”
I wake up to the sound of sizzling on a skillet. The smell of freshly cracked peppercorns and bacon tickles my nose. I sit up slowly, avoiding turning my head too much since it feels like there’s a ten-pound weight strapped to it. I stretch out all my limbs and stand from the couch to trudge to the island. The sight I’m met with appeals to me a little more than I want it to.
Logan’s standing in front of the oven in a fresh white t-shirt and a pair of red athletic shorts. His dark wavy hair is slightly rumpled from sleep. The muscles in his arms work as he moves between his bacon, eggs, and pancakes, timing everything to perfection and not missing a beat. His ability to focus and move his arms to the right place at the right time must carry over from his drumming to his cooking. The food smells so good I have to swallow saliva to avoid drooling over it.
“Good morning,” I say from my place at the island.
Logan turns his head back from the oven for only a second and flashes me his winning smile.
“Morning, sweets.” He turns back to the task at hand. “Did you sleep okay on that couch?”
“Yeah, it was actually very comfortable,” I tell him honestly.
“Good. Sorry I didn’t give you the bed, but it looked like you would slap me if I took you away from that pillow.”
“I probably would have.” I draw the smell of his breakfast into my senses again and sigh with contentment. “This smells heavenly, by the way.”
He grins over his shoulder again. “It tastes even better.” He turns back to the food and moves some of the bacon to a waiting plate. It crackles and sputters when it touches a little bit of water that was lingering there. “How are you feeling this morning?”
“Truthfully? Like shit.”
He sighs. “Sorry, sweets. From experience, I know it’s going to be a while before you can say you feel fine.”
Grinning, I stop trying to deny how much I love it when he calls me that. “Well, hopefully this food will help me feel a little better.”
And the view, I add in my head.
A few minutes later, Logan serves me my breakfast feast and I enjoy it thoroughly, moaning over nearly every bite. Every flavor and texture combination complements each other perfectly and combines to create a symphony of flavor. The slight zing of pepper on the bacon makes it even better.
After my plate is clean, I beg for more, and he loads it up again. I clean it a second time and finally lean back with my stomach poking out about three inches more than normal.
“I’m going to fill out in no time if I start hanging out with you,” I say, making him chuckle.
“You are more than welcome to come over any time you want.” He winks from his perch beside me at the island.
We fall silent as he takes dishes to the sink and rinses them out. Things have changed between us, and it’s strange, but it’s nice. I just hope we don’t move too fast. We’re both going through things right now. It would be awful to wreck this before it even starts.
Before Logan can finish the dishes, the lock on the door jiggles and clatters. Logan turns the water off and dries his hands on a nearby towel.
The door opens, and in walks a leggy, highlighted, shiny blonde goddess I can only assume is Claire. Her expression changes from cheerful to irate as soon as her gaze locks onto me.
“What the hell? Logan, what is she doing in our apartment?”
I stand from my stool awkwardly and pick up my phone from the counter.
“Um, I was just leaving,” I stutter. “Logan brought me here after my party last night because I couldn’t stay at home.”
She keeps her attention on Logan. “How could you keep this slut in our apartment overnight?”
I bristle, but Logan lashes out at her before I can.
“How dare you call her that?” he bellows. He strides up to Claire and stands his ground in front of her.
“You have no business even hanging out with her outside the band,” Claire challenges him with a forefinger pointed in his face.
“Just like you have no business jetting off to see your New York boyfriend every weekend,” Logan retorts.
A gasp catches in her throat. Claire sways, her balance atop her bubble gum pink heels thrown by his accusation. “What are you talking about? I go there for work.”
Logan clenches his teeth. Now it’s his turn to point in her face. “I saw the texts, Claire. You’ve been cheating on me for two months now. I’m not the idiot you think I am.”
Her lower lip trembles, and she turns on the crocodile tears. “Logan, I’m sorry…I swear I just broke things off and I’m never going to see him again—”
“Get out of this apartment now,” he orders, pointing straight at the door behind her.
Claire’s squeaky sobs cause a tick in my ears. “But Logan, you know I’m struggling for money. I have nowhere to go—”
“I know, and I foolishly took pity on you for that, but not anymore. I refuse to waste one more cent on your cheating ass. Go ask your East Coast boyfriend to take you in. I’ll leave the door open tonight so you can move your things out.”
Logan stalks to the front door and holds it open for her exit. Claire continues to sob as she rolls her suitcase out behind her and steps out the door. Logan pounds against the doorjamb with a balled up fist as he watches her leave.
“Fucking bitch!” he yells after her. “Good riddance!”
Logan slams the door shut so hard I’m afraid he might split it in half. My chest tightens when he hides his face and leans against it. I know that must have been such a hard thing for him to do, but he’ll be so much better off without her. I’m proud of him for finally standing up for himself. I tiptoe up behind him and lay my palm flat against his back, rubbing in slow circles. His shoulder blades are trembling with suppressed sobs.
“Logan, it’s okay to cry in front of me too,” I whisper.
He sinks to the floor on his knees and leans his head against the door as the sobs rip from his chest. I kneel down next to him and hold him as my tears join his. He grabs onto my arm in front of his chest for dear life. I squeeze him so hard our bodies seem to meld together.
One thing’s for sure—we’re going to need each other to get through the weekend from hell.
November 1
Worst Day of My Life, and That’s Saying a Lot
I’m back at home now and everything’s cleaned up from the party I’ll never forget. Between Raven and Gio’s revelation and Logan’s breakup, the entire weekend felt like one big nightmare.
I stayed at Logan’s until Dad and Cass got home from Santa Barbara and he took me home. One look at my face, and Dad knew something horrible had
happened. I told him all about how Raven and Gio had plotted against me and he was so furious with Raven that he called her up and told her she is never welcome in our house again. We’re not going to be seeing Raven anymore except at school. Visiting Jess is going to be interesting now.
I don’t know how I’m going to walk into school tomorrow and face both of them. Gio faked a relationship with me and Raven was in on the whole thing. I didn’t even know it was possible to feel so betrayed. They must have sent the video to the press, because our names are plastered all over social media again. People think Raven and I are closer than ever, but of course that couldn’t be further from the truth. I don’t know how she can even think I’d ever want to see her again after this.
I hope Logan’s all right. Breaking up with Claire really destroyed him. He told me he had bought her a ring and everything before he realized she was cheating on him. Both of us have shattered hearts now. We’ll have to be each other’s friend and rock in this time of heartbreak. Maybe more, but I think we need some time to recover first.
Here goes the worst week of my entire life. I take a tiny drop of comfort in knowing I can’t get any lower than this.
Ttyl,
Mads
When I walk into school on Monday morning, I scan the hallway thoroughly to make sure Gio is nowhere to be found before approaching my locker. Liam Wellington is there, but I don’t even offer him a sideways glance as I twist my combination. I open the door for five seconds to get what I need and close it again. Soft whispers serenade me all the way through the building on my way to homeroom. Tears prick their way to the surface of my eyes, but I blink them back.
Just eight hours, I tell myself. Eight more hours, and I can go home and cry.
Just outside my classroom door, Chandler is waiting for me. I wrap my arms around her, still blinking to force the tears to stay inside.
“Mads, I’m so sorry. I had no idea what was going on. You have to believe me—”
“I believe you,” I assure her. “You wouldn’t have come to get me if you were loyal to her.”
Chandler pulls back with tears glistening in her eyes. “I just want you to know I quit working for Raven. I think of you as a friend, and she hurt my friend. I can’t work for someone like that anymore. She never liked me anyway, so she didn’t mind too much.”
I pull her into my embrace again. “Thank you, Chan. You’re one of my girls now.”
Chandler and I eat lunch at a table indoors by ourselves. She watches me stir my pasta aimlessly for ten minutes before speaking up.
“Mads, you have to eat something,” she ventures softly.
I shrug. “I can’t. I’d probably puke it all up.”
Raven passes by with some of the assistants, stares me down, and brushes against our table on her way. I shudder at the pure soulless hatred I see there in her eyes. For some unknown reason, she despises me. She did even before she ever met me. It’s clear now. There’s no other reason she would concoct that plan against me from the moment I got in town. “You have to stand up to her,” Chandler surprises me by saying. I meet her deep green gaze. “Don’t let her win. You’ve done so well at keeping her in check, Mads. You’re our only hope.”
“I’m not anybody’s hope,” I grumble. “I don’t even have any hope of my own.”
Chandler grasps my hand across the table. She levels her gaze with mine, almost peering into my soul. “You are the strongest, most hopeful person I know. A superhero. She can only break you if you let her.”
I let Chandler’s words sink in for the rest of lunch period. I was strong. I had hope. Now I just feel like all the life has been squeezed from my veins. How do I find the courage to go on in the face of an enemy like Raven? How can I face Gio and work as his lab partner for the rest of the year?
After we drop our trays off, Chandler walks me to Physics, looking even more worried than I am. As soon as we get to the door, we both poke our heads in and groan when we see Gio sitting at his place next to my chair.
“I don’t know if I can go in there,” I mutter.
“You got this, girl. I believe in you,” Chandler whispers.
I consider skipping class for a brief moment, but then I square my shoulders and draw up straight as if there’s a string attached to my back. I might be crushed, but I am not defeated. Gio is not going to be the reason I tarnish my perfect school attendance record. There is one little bit of business I need to take care of, though.
The girl who had the braids and sat next to me on the first day of school is on the other end of the room from Gio. I’ve seen her lab partner eyeing him hungrily for the past six weeks. I walk up to the sly brunette with the dancing hazel eyes and ask if she’d like to trade partners with me. She practically squeals her “Yes!” and darts over to his side of the room. I avoid watching as I settle into my seat beside Braids Girl, whose hair is now relaxed into a beautiful black wave. “Hi, I’m Michelle,” she says, stretching a hand out to me.
I accept her hand and shake it. “Mads.”
Her dark eyes give me the same pitying look I get from everyone. “So sorry about what happened with Gio.”
I shrug and look down at my iPad. “I’ll get over it. I just don’t think I can work with him anymore. Hopefully Ms. Dawson won’t mind.”
Ms. Dawson comes to the front of the classroom and calls out attendance. She immediately notices the change when she calls “Giovanni Abate” and I’m not next to him. She searches the room for me, and I watch as she locates me and considers making me move for a second. She purses her lips, shakes her head dismissively, and goes back to calling out names.
I glance at Michelle and see a relieved smile on her face. “Thank God,” she whispers. I laugh quietly and agree.
After school, Chandler walks me to my locker from my last class so she can help me search the hallways for my formidable foes. When the coast is clear, I hurriedly open my locker and drop off what I don’t need to take home. I’m slamming the door shut and thinking I got off easy today when I hear a voice behind me that makes my blood curdle.
“Running away, are we?”
I stay facing my locker, afraid to even look Raven in the eye. “Go away. We have nothing left to say to each other.”
Raven comes around to my side so I have to face her. She’s surrounded by her minions, including Mari, who’s gone back to faithfully serving her.
“You have a lot of nerve telling Mike about what happened that night,” she growls in a lowered tone. I turn and see her eyes shooting ice shards at me. “Our deal was confidential. You’d better not be thinking of telling anyone else. I will not hesitate to bring you down if you do.”
“Haven’t you already brought me low enough?” I spit back.
“I did what I did to help you. To help us,” Raven insists.
I scoff. “If you think you were helping me, you are more hopeless than I thought. You’re not getting anything else out of me.”
“We had a deal—”
“The ‘deal’ is over. We are over. You are no longer my sister, and I never want to speak to you again. Come on Chan, let’s go.”
I turn to leave with Chandler in tow, but my sister’s low, rich chuckle sounds behind me.
“Congratulations, my darling twin, you just declared war.”
In this moment, normally I would have only had two choices. I could stoop to her level and fight back, or I could run like a coward and let her have her victory. Neither of those options appeals to me. But a third option was given to me by Chandler earlier today…
Being my own superhero.
If I don’t stand up to her, no one will. We’re on a level playing field. I have everything she has and then some, because I have real friends. I’m the only one who can defeat her, and the only way to do that is to play her game.
As if I’ve left my own body, I hear the same chuckle gurgle out of my own throat. I stop in my tracks and smirk over my shoulder. She doesn’t have the last word anymore. I’ll never let her
have that again.
“Bring it on.”
To be continued…
Hollow Moon (Bad Wolf)–Awolnation
Everybody’s Fool–Evanescence
Wherever You Will Go–The Calling
The Good Life–Three Days Grace
Look What You’ve Done–Jet
Somewhere I Belong–Linkin Park
Bad Reputation–Adelitas Way
Let Me Live My Life–Saint Asonia
Hot For Teacher–Van Halen
Teenagers–My Chemical Romance
My Immortal–Evanescence
Right Here–Staind
Again–Flyleaf
Ship to Wreck–Florence + the Machine
Santa Monica–Everclear
Dirty Little Secret–All-American Rejects
Tear Down The Wall–Art of Dying
Human–The Killers
Lies of the Beautiful People–Sixx A.M.
Paparazzi on Mopeds–The Cranberries
Lost in Hollywood–System of a Down
Shake It Out–Florence + the Machine
Survival–Muse
To everyone I’ve ever met who’s challenged, bullied, or underestimated me.
You don’t know it, but you made me who I am.
Sitting in my bed, I stare at the tarp-covered swimming pool outside my window, fighting a war within myself. My heart is torn between regret that I ever came to Los Angeles in the first place and fear at the thought of going back “home” and losing everything I’ve worked so hard to achieve. I met my mother. I brought Dad back to his roots. I created my band. I got into the high school of my dreams. And now, I’m teetering on the brink of throwing it all away because my menace of a twin sister is here and I don’t even know if I can stand to be within five hundred miles of her or Giovanni Abate.
An uninvited tear emerges and turns cold on its way down my cheek. I especially can’t stand living next door to Gio. Right now, I can hear the pumping of his EDM music rumbling all the way across our two yards and under our house. It’s almost as if he takes every possible opportunity to remind me he’s here and he’s not mine, yet that’s impossible. He doesn’t even care that I exist.
D.O.R.K. Series Box Set Page 40