by Serena Grey
“Or the body,” I amended for him.
“Or the body.” He smiled. “You make me feel good about myself.”
I frowned. “Why shouldn’t you?”
There was a short silence, and through the windows, passing lights threw shadows on his perfect face. “I haven’t always done the right thing,” he said quietly.
“Nobody has,” I told him. I thought about the pattern my life had taken all those years before I made the decision to change things. Now it was clear to me how carelessly I’d used people. I could see all the unanswered messages, the dismissed feelings, the wounded hearts I’d left in my wake.
“I never used to think of how many people I hurt by never allowing myself to feel,” I told him, my voice soft, “but there were a lot, and it hurts me to think there are people out there whose views on relationships were shaped by how horribly I treated them.”
“We tell ourselves it doesn’t matter because we didn’t make any promises…”
“But it doesn’t change the hurt.” I took a deep breath and stroked his face. We couldn’t go back. All I could do was hope that between the two of us, we could completely heal each other.
Chapter Seven
I woke up sometime in the middle of the night and discovered I was alone in bed. My body still felt languid and satisfied from the hours Jason had spent making good on the sensual promises he’d made all night.
I got out of bed and put on a robe then padded over to the attached suite of rooms that included a large dressing room and a bathroom. Just before we went to bed, Jason had shown me the changes that had been made while he was away. The closet was now larger, with more mirrors. The walls and fittings had changed from a mute gray to a brilliant white. Spaces had been added for shoe storage and handbags.
For me.
He’d also remodeled the library attached to his study, adding a lot more books and a delightful reading nook with soft cushions and a view of a tree-lined park. It was perfect.
He’d been working on these changes even when I was sure I would never speak to him again, because all his focus had been on the hope that I would forgive him.
He’d been building his existence around me while I’d been holding on to my walls.
I hugged myself. I would never be able to take this for granted, this love, this exquisite fulfillment of knowing he belonged to me. It was worth everything.
I left the dressing room and went looking for Jason, crossing the carpeted hall and going first to the den then to his study.
The door was ajar, and from inside, I could hear a woman’s voice. As I pushed the door open, I realized that it was coming from Jason’s phone. Jason was at his desk, his chest bare and his head in his hands as he listened to the voice coming from the phone.
“…not the first time and I know you don’t want to hear from me, but I have something very important to tell you, and I don’t have much time. I keep trying to get in touch with you, and you keep blocking all my efforts. I’m finding it…”
The message stopped playing as Jason noticed me at the door and touched the screen of his phone. He stared at me, almost as if he couldn’t really see me standing there.
My heart was thudding. Who was the speaker and why was he avoiding her? Was it someone from his past? I imagined an old lover coming back to cast a shadow on my happiness, and my stomach twisted in pain.
“Who was that?” I asked, keeping my voice calm and trying not to give audience to the multiple scenarios and explanations making their way into my head.
He made a tired face. “Nobody important.”
I shook my head and steep farther into the room. “I just heard you listening to a message from a woman you’re avoiding. You’re going to have to do better than that.”
His eyes shuttered as he rose from behind his desk. “Don’t you trust me?”
I paused. “I do.”
“Then believe me when I say it’s nobody important.”
“You don’t look like it was nobody important.” When I’d come into the study, the strain had been clear in his body, and now I could see it in his face. I went to him and placed my hands on his chest. His heart pounded under my fingers, and I sighed. “You can tell me.”
He pulled away from me. “Go back to bed,” he said.
I frowned. “I don’t understand. Are we keeping secrets from each other?”
He swallowed and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “It was my mother, Daphne.” His voice was flat. “It was my fucking mother.”
I stared at him, taken aback and unable to comprehend what he was saying. “Your mother is trying to reach out to you?”
He didn’t answer.
“For how long?”
He shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.”
I took a step toward him, but he moved away from me, almost as if he didn’t want me to touch him.
“I don’t understand, Jason. Why won’t you talk to her?”
“I don’t want to have this conversation,” he snapped.
I swallowed. I’d hit a nerve, but I didn’t know how to let it go.
“She’s your mother.”
“No, actually, she’s just the woman who gave birth to me.” A look of anger crossed his features. “Not every mother was like yours, Daphne. Not every mother cares enough to pen a heartfelt goodbye to her only child. Some of them just walk away without so much as a goodbye.”
I bristled. “I didn’t share my mother’s letter with you so you could throw her words in my face in an argument.”
“Are we arguing? Over my mother?” He rubbed at his temples. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Daphne. I’m just…not interested in talking to a woman who abandoned me.”
“But she wants to talk to you, and it’s probably something important.” I couldn’t understand it, or him. If I had a chance to talk to my mother, I would…I would take it without a thought.
He went to the door and held it open for me. “I don’t want to talk about this,” he said. “Just…go back to sleep.”
I wanted to argue, but Jason’s face told me the subject depressed him, so I went back to bed. I couldn’t go back to sleep, though. I was pissed at him for closing the door on any discussion about his relationship with his mother. I’d convinced myself we shared everything, and it was a blow to find out he was keeping something from me.
He didn’t come back to bed, and after a while, I sent Amy a message to see if she was awake.
You up?
Yes. What’s up? Are you okay? Is Jason okay?
Yes, we’re fine.
Okay good. It’s three o’clock in the morning, Daphne.
Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. I just really need to ask you something.
Fire away.
What do you know about Jason’s mother?
Her replies had been coming fast, but after my question, the typing signal didn’t come on for a long while. When it finally did, it took a minute before she sent the message.
Whatever you do, Daphne, don’t go there. I can’t imagine there’s a subject that hurts Jason as much as that of his mother.
I sighed. I already have. She left him a message, and he’s refusing to talk to her. I just want to know why, and he’s not talking.
Give it time. I’m sure he’ll tell you when he’s ready.
Give it time.
Jason didn’t come back to bed, and after waiting and waiting, I finally fell asleep. When I woke up, there was a note on the nightstand telling me he had left early for work.
I prepared for work, mad at him. Instead of talking about something so important, something that obviously still affected him, he was choosing to ignore me, to deflect, to dismiss my questions. I was still stewing in my office when he called.
“I’m sorry,” he said as soon as I answered the call.
His apology caught me off guard. I sniffed, still hurt. “I’m still mad at you,” I said.
He sighed. “I apologize. It makes sense that you’re curious, and I should have trie
d to explain instead of shutting you out…and bringing up your mother…I was way out of line.”
I closed my eyes. “I’m sorry too. I…I shouldn’t have been so pushy, especially since I don’t know the whole story.”
“That is true,” he said frankly.
I chuckled. “Well, I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry too.” He paused, and I heard a series of taps, like he was drumming his fingers on his desk. “Lunch?” he asked.
“I’d love that,” I replied, welcoming the chance to talk face to face. “Where?”
“You choose.”
“What about your office?” I suggested, remembering the naughty thoughts I’d had about a private meeting on his desk. “I have a fantasy I’m sure you’d like.”
He laughed softly. “I’m looking forward to this,” he said. “Leonard will pick you up.”
The drive to his office was only a few minutes. The building was a chrome and glass architectural beauty that stood multiple floors above the structures that surrounded it. It housed offices while an adjacent building in the same plaza housed a five-star hotel, and the two were linked by a twentieth-floor crosswalk.
Leonard dropped me off in front of the building entrance where a young man with short dreads and a well-cut suit was waiting for me.
“Hi, Daphne,” he said with a smile. “I’m Andre, and I’m here to take you to Jason’s office.”
“Hi, Andre.” I smiled. “Lead the way.”
He gave me a sharp nod and led me into the beautiful marble lobby and through the bank of turnstiles in the security area. At the elevators, he used a keycard to select the floor, and in a few short moments, the car deposited us in the lobby of one of the top levels.
As the elevator opened, I saw Jason’s company logo enlarged to cover the wall opposite me. Andre didn’t wait for me to study it as he quickly led me through a series of glass-partitioned areas to Jason’s office.
It was a large, glass-walled space that stood half a floor above the rest of the open-plan office. Jason was seated behind a large desk, visible from outside but beautiful and impossibly sexy. He looked unreachable, focused entirely on his work.
Andre opened the door for me, and after I stepped into the office, he closed it quietly behind me.
At the faint click of the door, Jason raised his eyes from his computer screen, and his face broke into a welcoming smile.
“You’re here,” he said, rising and walking around the desk to take me in his arms. His jacket was hanging over the back of his chair, but even without it, with his shirt tucked into his slim pants, he looked like a boss—which he was.
I looked around the office. It was large, and on the only wall that wasn’t clear glass, there was a large screen showing at least four channels talking about finance topics. There was also some art—a picture I recognized as one of Amy’s and a few paintings. One of them, a bright, colorful, modern-style painting of a little boy playing in a shallow pond caught my eye. It was eerily familiar, and very beautiful.
Jason’s eyes followed my gaze to the painting, and as I turned back to look at him, his face was blank.
“Nice office,” I said, not sure if I’d missed something. “Andre brought me up.”
He chuckled. “I asked him to, and I’ll thank him later.” He gave my lower lip a quick nibble. “You look good. I like the librarian sexy-chic.”
“I don’t look like a librarian,” I said. I was wearing a soft jersey top and a knee-length black skirt. I only needed glasses to complete the librarian fantasy, but I wasn’t going to admit that.
“Okay, if you say so.” Jason laughed. “I was just going through a report, but I’m all set.”
“Your office is very modern, but not very private,” I observed. “I’m a bit disappointed. I was looking forward to joining…whatever the office version of the mile-high club is.”
Jason laughed. “I forgot about your fantasy.” He went to his desk and touched a button. Immediately, the glass around the office turned opaque, and shutters slowly unfurled from the ceiling, turning the office into a private one in the space of a few seconds.
“Well…” I smiled. “That’s impressive.”
“I use that setting for sensitive meetings.” He leaned on the desk and pulled me into his arms. “Very rarely though, so you can be sure everyone out there is wondering exactly what we’re doing in here.”
I traced my fingers along the crisp cotton of his shirt. “As if you’d care.”
“You know I don’t.” He curled one hand around the back of my neck and pulled me in for a kiss then pressed the button again, sending the shutters up and clearing the glass. He stroked my tongue with his, sending waves of heat crashing through me, and when he released me, my skin was flushed and I was almost breathless.
We had an audience. From the lower floor, curious stares were turned in the direction of Jason’s office. The moment passed quickly as they all tried to look busy and focused on anything but their boss making out with a woman in his office.
I giggled. “Now you’ve given them something to talk about.
“Everyone talks about their bosses anyway.” He shrugged, nonchalant. “Lunch is next door.”
“The hotel?”
He nodded and led me back to the elevator.
The crosswalk was a few floors below his office. It was both scary and exhilarating to walk through what seemed like a long glass balcony miles above the ground.
The hotel had numerous restaurants, but Jason’s destination was a luxurious suite where the lunch he’d already ordered was waiting for us.
There was a bowl of strawberries and a covered dish filled with cream. I raised an eyebrow in Jason’s direction then dipped one of the strawberries in cream and took a bite. “Is this how you have lunch every day?”
He watched me lick cream from my fingers, his gaze hungry, almost predatory. “Not until now, but I’m willing to make it a habit if you are.” He wrapped his hand around my wrist and brought my fingers to his lips. His tongue flicked over my cream-covered skin, and heat pooled between my legs.
“Why don’t you tell me how your office fantasy goes?” he suggested, looking intently at my face.
“You look as if I’m about to make a business proposal.” His eyebrow quirked, and I laughed nervously. “It’s not very defined,” I said. “Just…you, in a suit…”
He grinned and smoothed his jacket. “I got that part already.”
“Yeah.” I bit my lip. “You do.”
His eyes turned serious. “Do I bend you over a desk or fuck you up against the wall?”
My breath fanned out from between my lips. “Both,” I whispered. “Then you fuck me from behind.”
“Hmm.” His eyes were dark and cloudy with desire, and that aroused me even more. He fed me another cream-covered fruit, and I licked the white sweetness from his fingers, hungry for much more than food.
“Do I take off your clothes?” he asked.
“Not completely.”
He pulled my top down over my shoulders, trapping my upper arms in the stretched-out neckline and exposing my strapless bra. “Like this?”
I trembled. “More.”
He pulled down the bra, and my breasts sprang free, nipples pointed and aching for his touch.
He drew a finger over one pink nipple, mesmerized. I knew he loved my breasts, and it awed me how reverential he became whenever he saw them. “So fucking beautiful,” he whispered.
I could barely breathe. My lips parted as I drew in shallow breaths, intensely aroused. He squeezed my nipple between his thumb and forefinger then did the same to the other one before leaning down to cover my mouth with a hot, demanding kiss.
“Is it fast or slow?” he asked, releasing my lips.
“Fast.” I exhaled, my core clenching. “Fast and hard.”
“I can do that,” he said, nudging me toward the bed and bending me over the soft mattress. My arms were still constrained by the neckline of my top, and he grabbed both, h
olding them at my back as he gently pushed my upper body down onto the bed, my head resting on the mattress and my hips lifting toward him.
He pushed my skirt up to my waist, stroking my bared skin as he pulled down my panties. His fingers slipped between my lips, stroking the wet heat in my core and spreading my juices in sweet circular strokes.
Arousal coursed through me, making me slicker for his fingers. He rubbed and stroked the quivering entrance to my body, teasing me with a promise of what would come later.
The pad of his thumb rubbed circles on and around my clit, driving me crazy with need. I heard him chuckle as my body jerked in ecstasy. “I can’t decide what I want to do with your body,” he said in a soft, musing voice.
“Fuck me,” I suggested, shameless in my need for his cock inside me.
“Patience.” He slid two fingers into me and drew them along my slick walls as I clenched hotly around them. “I want to lick every inch of your beautiful body, but I’ll make do with fucking you hard, for now.”
He undid his zipper, and the next moment, he was probing at my entrance. He rubbed himself against my eager flesh, moving along my wet center to rub his massive cock against my swollen clit before coming back to my wet entrance and pushing slowly inside.
I arched my waist further, moving my hips, inviting him deeper. He filled me to the hilt, making a sound that was halfway between a groan and a sigh as he stretched me so sweetly my whole body felt like it was on fire.
I rolled my hips, desperately needing the friction of his flesh moving on mine.
His fingers dug into my skin almost to the point of pain. “God, you’re so sweet,” he rasped harshly. Then he drew out and slammed hard into me again.
“Oh yes, like that,” I moaned, my eyes falling closed as he drove into my slick heat again and again. “It feels so good, I can’t bear it.” I sighed his name as he rammed hard into me, going wild as pleasure made me oblivious to anything but the feeling of him inside me, fucking me hard and fast.
He bent over me, reaching for my breast and squeezing hard. My body exploded, and I cried out in helpless pleasure.