by Emma Dalton
“No, no, no,” I quickly say. “It’s fine. We talked about this already. How about you show me how to have fun at a high school party,” I suggest. “Uh, not the drinking part. Just the dancing.”
His brows shoot up. “You want to dance?”
Heck yeah! I’ve been dreaming about it for years. Okay, maybe in my dreams there was a white dress involved…
“Sure,” I say, trying to act all nonchalant. “Show me your sick moves, Barrington.”
He chuckles. “I wouldn’t call them sick. But sure.”
He slides his hand into mine and guides me to the dance floor. More like he’s dragging me, because I’m frozen in place. Because sexy Brayden Barrington is holding my hand.
True, he’s touched me before, but he’s holding my hand. That’s like one of the most romantic things in the world.
I just hope my hand isn’t sweaty…
He finds an empty spot on the dance floor and faces me with a smile, starting to shake his body. I mimic his movements, but I’m so uncoordinated that I trip over my feet. “Sorry, I have two left feet.”
He waves his hand. “All that matters is that you’re having fun.”
I am, I really am. Because I’m dancing with thee Brayden Barrington. At this moment, it doesn’t matter that he’s my fake boyfriend because we’re having fun. We’re both having fun. As friends.
“There you go,” he says with a laugh as I get in the groove of things. I don’t know what my body is doing, but it seems like I’ve lost control of it. It’s dancing to the beat of the music, not caring that I’m probably making a fool of myself. Because I’m having a blast.
I catch sight of my friends dancing together. They smile at me and give me thumbs up. Some of the other kids are watching us, especially Teagyn. She’s got such a scowl, she looks so unattractive. I ignore her and grin at Brayden. “This is fun.”
“Super fun,” he agrees. “I didn’t know you had such awesome moves.”
“Oh please,” I say. “Hey, watch this. Dani taught it to me.”
I try to pirouette, but as I’m doing it, I hear the song switch out to a slow one. I gasp as I trip over my feet and crash toward the floor. But my body doesn’t hit the ground—I land in strong protective arms.
I gaze up into Brayden’s gorgeous blue eyes.
“You okay?” he whispers.
I untangle myself from his arms. “Yeah,” I say as confidently as I can, though I know my voice quakes. “Totally okay. Other than the fact that I failed the pirouette and embarrassed myself…I think I’m going to drown my sorrows in some Coke.” I turn and walk away.
“Kara?” he calls.
I shut my eyes for a second before slowly twisting around to face him.
“Do you want to dance with me?”
“What?”
He gestures to the couples on the dance floor wrapped in each other’s arms. Does he mean…? He wants to…?
Oh, of course. As a couple, we should dance in each other’s arms, too. Like all the other couples are doing. Real couples who aren’t faking it.
I know. I agreed to do this. But to slow dance with my crush? I want to do it so badly. It’s like a dream come true. But in my dreams, he was my real boyfriend.
I should refuse and walk away. Why torture myself like this? He’s a good guy and would never hurt me, but he doesn’t realize that he is hurting me. It’s not his fault of course. The only one at fault here is me.
But everyone is looking. Watching. Waiting. How could I reject him like that?
“Sure,” I force out. “I would love to dance with you.”
His smile can chase away everyone’s greatest fear as he wraps his arms around me and gently yanks me to his chest. With shaky hands, I snake them around his neck and turn my face so my cheek is pressed against his chest. And then we join the many other couples dancing in this intimate way.
I hope he doesn’t hear my thumping heart. Hope he doesn’t feel my trembling body. His heart doesn’t thump, his body doesn’t tremble. All I feel is his strong, hard chest and warm body so close to mine.
We’re just actors in a play, I tell myself. Putting up an act, nothing more.
“Is this okay?” he whispers. “Because we can stop if it’s not.”
I swallow the tears threatening my eyes. “It’s fine.”
And so we sway in each other’s arms to the beat of the soft music. All the while, I try not to burst into tears.
Finally, the DJ switches to an upbeat song. I step out of his arms and paste on a normal face, smiling at him. “That was fun.”
He watches me for a bit with a look in his eyes that I can’t explain or understand, then nods. “Yeah, it was.”
“Cool. So I’m going to hang out with my friends for a bit.”
He nods again. “Yeah. Cool. Have fun.”
I’m about to turn around, but Teagyn blocks my way. Flanked by Macy and Felicia.
“You guys look so cute together.” Overly-sweet honey drips from Teagyn’s tongue. “And that dance? So romantic. But…” She squints at me and Brayden. “I can’t help but notice that I’ve never seen you guys kiss.”
My wide eyes flit to Brayden’s shocked ones before returning to Teagyn. “What?” I croak.
She folds her arms over her chest as she regards the two of us. “If you guys are actually together, shouldn’t you kiss?”
Every single person in the room stares at us now, including my friends. Their expressions? Shock and bewilderment. Probably the same look I have on my face.
Teagyn motions toward everyone. “We’re all waiting for Edenbury High’s most talked-about couple to lock lips.”
I swallow before glancing at Brayden again. He looks frozen and tongue-tied.
Teagyn taps her shoe on the floor like she’s impatient.
Taking a deep breath, I say, “That’s private.”
She scoffs. “Are you a prude? Or does Brayden not want to kiss you?” She makes a face like the thought of kissing me will make her vomit.
“We don’t have to prove anything to you.”
She throws her head up as she snickers to her friends. “I knew it. They can’t possibly be dating. Who would want to date someone like her? I bet she’s using Brayden to be popular. And Brayden’s too nice to say no.”
“That’s not true,” Brayden’s quiet voice says. “She’s not using me.”
Teagyn’s brows lift. “So you’re using her?”
A whole array of emotions passes over his face. The one thing that stands out most is his concern for me. Because he thinks he put me in this position. I also can tell it’s on the tip of his tongue to just tell everyone the truth. For my sake.
But we can’t tell them the truth. Because then everyone will know he and I just got together so he could get closer to my dad, which means my dad might find out. He would think the worst of Brayden for using me like that. No, over my dead body would I ever allow anything like that to happen.
As Brayden opens his mouth to say something, I step over and move closer to him, so close that there’s barely any space between us. “Don’t,” I whisper so only he can hear. “It’s not worth you losing your shot.”
“We don’t have to do this,” he whispers back. “Like you said, we don’t have to prove anything to them.”
“It’ll be okay,” I tell him with an assuring nod, letting him know I’m totally okay with this and he has nothing to worry about.
He searches my eyes one more time before nodding.
“What’s the holdup?” Teagyn’s annoying voice demands. I wish I could slide off my shoe and chuck it at her face.
Giving Brayden another reassuring nod, I step even closer to him until our chests touch. Now there is literally no space between us. I move my face closer to his.
His gaze drops to my lips before he dips his face to mine.
As our mouths glide toward each other, my eyes flutter shut. This might not be the way I’ve fantasized about this, but holy heck, I’m about to have
my first kiss. With none other than thee Brayden Barrington.
It feels like forever until our lips touch, but finally, his warm breath is on my face and then his warm, soft lips press against mine. They’re hesitant at first, but then they start to move over mine, slowly, leisurely. Perfect.
And then it’s over.
He steps back and my eyes flutter open. Our gazes don’t leave each other’s, as though our eyes are glued on one another. Some of the football players cheer. I feel the intense scowl on Teagyn’s face before she stomps away with the other cheerleaders. Some kids whisper. But I don’t look at any of them because my gaze is still locked on Brayden.
That was the best kiss in my entire life.
Okay, it was my only kiss and I don’t have anything to compare it to, but man, that was the best thing that could have happened to me. Even though it was forced upon us.
There’s nothing but concern in Brayden’s eyes. Concern for me. I wish I could tell him he has nothing to be worried about—that was awesome—but I know he doesn’t feel the same. How can he when he doesn’t feel about me the way I feel about him?
And that’s when the reality of the situation really hits home. Brayden was just forced to kiss me. Someone he doesn’t like. Someone he never imagined he would kiss in a million years. Is he disgusted? Upset? I can’t read any other emotion in his eyes other than concern. Which is now morphing into sympathy. No, pity.
He feels sorry for me.
I turn on my heels and weave through the crowd staring at me. “I’m leaving,” I tell my friends.
They hurry after me as I exit the house. I hold up my hand as each one of them opens their mouths to say something. “I don’t want to talk about it. Can you call your sister, Ally?”
“Sure.” She fumbles for her phone. “I’ll text her to pick us up right away.”
I hug my arms as I battle tears. The kiss meant the world to me, but the only thing Brayden feels is pity. He feels sorry that a loser like me could only get a kiss through a dare. Because there’s no way on this Earth someone like Brayden Barrington would ever want to kiss someone like me.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Brayden
I toss and turn all night, the memories of what happened only a few hours ago running around in my head. Kara so close to me. Kara’s soft, warm lips pressed to mine. Kara fleeing with her friends as though the devil chased her.
My head isn’t here as I get ready for the Falcons game with Mr. Gander, or when I climb into his car.
Kara was so kind to give me her ticket, but the truth is, the game is the farthest thing from my mind right now. I keep replaying the party, wondering if I hurt her. Who am I kidding? Of course I hurt her. She was forced to be in a situation she didn’t want to be in all because of me. I hate forcing anyone to do something they don’t want to do. I’d never force a girl to kiss me when she doesn’t want to.
Why did Teagyn have to do that? Put us on the spot like that?
It was wrong. I feel terrible and hope she doesn’t think poorly of me. I’m not that kind of person.
The kiss, though? It was the most amazing thing I have ever experienced in my life. She wasn’t my first, of course, but it was wow. More than fireworks on the Fourth of July. When she and I locked lips, the world stood still—no, it poured all its goodness onto us. Showered us.
And then it was over. She looked at me like she was horrified. Embarrassed. She wanted to get as far away from me as possible. And I wanted to chase after her, to apologize for forcing her into this.
I don’t regret kissing her at all, I just wish it were under different circumstances. And I wouldn’t lie and say I wouldn’t mind kissing her again, wrapping her in my arms, feeling like…
No. We’re not really together.
“Son, are you all right?” Mr. Gander says. “I’ve been calling your name, but it doesn’t seem like you heard me at all.”
It takes me a second to remember where I am and who I’m with—on the way to the Falcons game with Kara’s dad. I’m trying to make a good impression on this man, but how would he react if he knew I pretty much forced his daughter to kiss me? He’d toss my butt into the street.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I lie. “Just have a lot on my mind. Football and school and the future.” And your daughter who’s become such a good friend. And I wish she’d…that we’d…
No. Kara would never choose a guy like me.
Mr. Gander nods in understanding. “For sure. I remember how I was at your age. The pressure you’re under.” He places his hand on my shoulder. “You’ll be fine. Just take a deep breath. Why don’t you tell me about your intentions with my daughter?”
My eyes widen. “My intentions?”
He nods. “She’s very precious to me. And I don’t want her to get hurt. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
I nod, my throat tight. She’s not the one who will get hurt when we end our arrangement. I’m so invested in her, it’s like she’s become part of me. Weird as that sounds. And after reading the article? It just made me more excited to see her, her smile, hear her laugh. It makes me want to spend more time with her.
But after that kiss yesterday? I have no idea where we stand or what will happen to us. And about the arrangement, but that’s the least important thing right now. Sure, I want to get recruited, but I care more about her feelings.
What can I do to fix this? I haven’t texted her since the party. I guess I’m worried she’ll reject me. I wouldn’t be able to handle that.
“Good, as long as we’re clear on that,” her dad says. “I want you to know I approve of you.”
I rub the back of my neck. “Oh. Thanks. That means a lot.”
Her horrified face floats before mine, but I squeeze my eyes shut. I can’t let it tear me apart. I need to make a good impression on her dad or everything we’ve done so far would be for nothing.
I start a conversation about football and he’s completely immersed in the topic. He reminds me a little of my dad— they both love football. Mr. Gander was quarterback in high school and college, and he laughs when he tells me he had all the girls wrapped around his finger.
“I was The Man,” he says with another chuckle. “I thought I was invincible. King of the school. If my son behaved that way? I’d kick his rear end. But you’re not like that. You’re very humble.”
“Thanks.” My throat is tight again. If he knew I was using his daughter to get close to him, would he approve of me? No.
What if I’m starting to…to maybe see this as more than just a fake relationship?
But what does it matter anyway? She ran away from me.
The truth is, I was starting to feel more than friendship toward her before the kiss, but now that we’ve shared that, my feelings for her have only grown. And it’s so silly because she doesn’t feel the same.
We reach the stadium, get out of the car, and find our seats. I try to be pleasant and a good conversationalist, but I can’t get his daughter out of my head. I never felt this way about a girl before. Is she…is she that special one I’ve been waiting for? I always figured I’d know when I met her, but now I’m not sure about anything. What if I found her but let her slip through my fingers?
Mr. Gander talks more about football before the game begins. Normally, I get so swept up in the cheers and the excitement I don’t think about anything else. But not today. No matter how much I try, I can’t forget about Kara and what happened between us.
But then I tell myself I need to pull it together or I won’t make a good impression on Mr. Gander. So as hard as it is, I force myself to push Kara to the back of my mind.
We have a good time and our team wins, so that’s great. Definitely a positive to my gloomy day.
Her dad peers at me once we’re back in the car. “You haven’t texted my daughter once,” he observes.
My eyes widen. He’ll see through the lie. “Yeah, Kara didn’t want to bother us. She wanted us to focus on the game and have a good time.”
He grins. “That sounds like my pumpkin. But please feel free to text her now. She really likes you, Brayden. But don’t tell her I told you that.”
I force a smile, the corners of my mouth trembling. Kara’s a very good actress. And I guess I am, too, since her dad doesn’t see through my lie.
I pretend to text her, though, my thumb hovering over her name. But I don’t contact her because I figure she needs time. Or maybe she doesn’t want to talk to me.
“Thanks for taking me to the game,” I tell him once he pulls up before my house. “I had a great time and I’m glad we got to know each other better.”
He smiles. “Thank you, Brayden. I feel the same.”
Normally, my body would perk up at his positive words—does this mean he’ll come to one of my games?—but because of what happened with Kara, all I feel is guilt. The only reason her dad likes me is because of her, and I put her in such an uncomfortable position.
Her dad waves and drives off. I enter my house and go up to my room, plopping down on my bed and staring at the ceiling.
As guilty as I feel, I can’t get that amazing kiss out of my head. And honestly? I don’t really want to.
Chapter Twenty-Four
The last few days have been…weird.
Brayden and I have been avoiding each other since the party on Saturday. Or should I say since the kiss. I feel him looking at me sometimes, like he wants to say something, but he never does. And I have no idea what to say to him, even though this strain between us is killing me.
When I walk through the school doors Wednesday morning, my eyes immediately search for Brayden—whether to ignore him or stare at him, I’m not sure. Maybe a bit of both? Either way, he’s not here and a sigh of relief escapes my lips.
I head over to my locker to grab my chem textbook, and after shutting my locker and turning around, I come face to face with Teagyn and her friends. The queen stands before me with her arms crossed over her chest and a glint in her eye. Her minions have similar glints as well. Not in the mood for whatever BS she has planned, I try to push past her. But she blocks my way.