by Emma Dalton
Dad studies me as I continue battling my tears. The only thing I see is Brayden’s sad eyes.
“Okay, pumpkin, here’s what I’ll do. I’ll give him another chance.”
My eyes leap to his. “What?”
He holds up his hand. “Only because I love you and he’s your boyfriend. And because he’s a good kid.” His face grows serious. “But you tell him he’d better be on his game this Friday. He needs to be flawless.”
I jump to my feet. “I will! I will! Thanks, Dad.” I rush over to him and throw my arms around him. “Thanks so much! I have to tell him.”
I call an Uber to take me to his house and ram my knuckles on the door. Feels like hours pass before it swings open to reveal Brayden. It doesn’t seem like anyone else is home, since it’s dead silent in there.
He must see the animated look on my face because he asks, “What happened?”
I enter the house and the words tumble out of my mouth. “My dad’s giving you another chance! He’s coming to watch you play this Friday!”
His eyes widen. “What? Are you serious?”
“Yes! He just told me.”
“How did you convince him?”
“I didn’t. I think he saw how important it was to me that he give you another shot.”
He flings his arms around me, squeezing me to his chest. “I can’t believe this. Thanks so much!”
I pull free, my face probably as serious as my dad’s. “But you have to be your best. You have to play as well as you did at homecoming.”
He nods quickly. “I will. I won’t let him, my parents, or you down.”
I grin. “See? This whole fake dating thing worked out after all!”
His smile drops. “Right.”
“What’s wrong?”
He shakes his head. “I just don’t know how to thank you. I feel like nothing I do will ever be enough.” He swallows. “I just need to make sure I’m ready. I can’t let anything distract me. No more nerves. I can do this.”
“Yeah. You focus only on football for the next few days. Then you’ll knock my dad off his feet.”
He smiles. “I hope so.” He flings his arms around me. “Thank you, Kara. I couldn’t have done this without you.” He steps back, rubbing the back of his head. “I’m acting like I already got recruited.”
“Because you will be. I know it. I can feel it. And if you need me to cheer you on from the sidelines, I’m your girl.”
His face brightens. “You really are special, Kara.”
My heart soars to heaven as he looks at me like I’m his world, but then it comes back to Earth when I remember this isn’t real. He’s not looking at me like I’m his world. I’ve just helped him get one step closer to his dream.
Chapter Thirty
On my way to my book club meeting Monday after school, I stop when I hear voices from around the corner of the hallway. Familiar voices. I inch closer to take a peek.
Brayden and Teagyn are standing there. The halls are deserted, except for the two of them. Their voices are hushed so I can’t hear what they’re saying.
They lean toward each other and kiss. I can’t see Brayden well because she’s blocking him, but I see enough. And it’s not just any kiss—it’s full of passion and love.
My heart shatters into a million pieces.
He kissed her. He kissed her.
Whirling on my heels, I fight tears as I make my way to the book club. How could he? How could he? Were they dating all this time? Was he fooling me?
Sure, we were faking all this time, but still. He should have told me he had a real girlfriend on the side.
Or…or did they just get together now? I knew I saw him gazing at her at the homecoming dance. I suspected he had feelings for her, but I didn’t want to believe them. But now I know the truth.
I shove the door to the book club open and throw myself down in my seat. I’m too broken, too angry, too upset to hold the tears anymore. They roll down my cheeks.
“Kara?” my friends gather around me, placing their hands on my back and shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
I glance up at each of them, shaking my head because I can’t get the words out. The others pull their desks closer to mine and sit down. “Talk to us,” Dani urges. “Please. We hate seeing you this upset.”
Ally rubs my back. “It’s okay, talk when you’re ready. We’re here for you.”
They sit with me for a few minutes as I try to make sense of my jumbling thoughts. But there’s nothing to make sense of. He never cared for me. Of course he didn’t. It was all fake to him.
I look at each of my friends. “I saw Brayden kissing Teagyn,” I whisper.
They exchange stunned glances.
I throw my hands up. “Why should I be surprised? Now that my dad is giving him another shot this Friday, he doesn’t need me anymore. So he ran to Teagyn.” Fresh tears pool out of my eyes.
“Jerk,” Charlie mutters. “I knew something like this would happen.”
I wipe my eyes with a tissue Dani provides for me. “But he’s not a jerk…he was so nice to me. How could he do this?”
Charlie’s face grows hard. “He played you just to get close to your dad. And now that he got what he wanted, he threw you to the curb.”
Tears spring to my eyes again and drip down my cheeks. I don’t know what to say, what to think. I’m just so lost and confused and I don’t want to do anything but cry. My friends know this and stay with me as the sounds of my tears fill the quiet room.
***
When I get home, I put on a brave face for my dad, pretending everything is great and telling him how much I’m looking forward to Brayden’s game on Friday. Then I sulk to my room and drop down on my bed. The tears continue to seep out of my eyes as I lay there. Just lay there.
Their kiss keeps replaying in my head over and over again. No matter what I do, I can’t forget it.
She’s definitely a better kisser than me. Has he compared us? Was I so disgusting that he ran to her? Did he want to forget me that badly?
My phone dings and I reach for it, assuming it’s my friends texting to try to comfort me some more. But my insides fill with dread and pain. He’s texting me after what he did?
Brayden: Hey, Kara. How are you? I think I had a good practice today, but I missed you in the bleachers. How was book club?
His words are so sweet, it’s hard to imagine this is the same guy who hurt me so badly just a few hours ago. He’s making it seem like he genuinely cares about me. If he cared, he wouldn’t have kissed the girl who’s been tormenting me since my epic fail at cheerleading tryouts.
Why can’t he be the guy I dreamed of? Why does a part of me still believe he is?
With fresh tears flowing from my eyes, I stash my phone under my pillow and turn to my side, closing my eyes. Mom always said things will look better in the morning, but I doubt that’s the case here. Because tomorrow morning, Brayden will still be with Teagyn. That won’t change.
My phone dings a few more times, and I know Brayden’s texting me. But I force myself to ignore him. For my own emotional health, I need to forget him.
***
I’m like a zombie as I enter school the next day. I don’t look at anyone, barely talk to my friends—and they understand that I need time—just go to my locker to get my books for first period. The football players are gathered in the distance, and I notice Brayden in the group. I also notice Teagyn there as well.
I rip my gaze away and head for my first class, trying not to cry at how lonely I feel. Brayden used to walk me to my classes, but that feels like centuries ago.
I get through my classes and then it’s time for lunch. I don’t have it in me to face everyone in the cafeteria, but I do want to hang out with my friends. They’ve been so supportive and I don’t want to shut them out. But as I make my way to the cafeteria, a hand latches around my wrist and drags me aside.
Brayden stands before me, so close I can see just how clear and beautiful his eyes are.
But I force my heart to remain calm. He’s not who I thought he was.
He searches my eyes. “Are you okay? Why haven’t you been answering my texts?”
I glance away from him because I can’t look him in the eye without bursting into tears. I thought I shed enough over him, but I guess not.
“What’s wrong?” His voice is soft, a little desperate. “Are you avoiding me?”
I should be mad at him, I should yell at him. But I can’t. I just can’t. There is only one thing I know for sure, though—I can’t do this anymore.
Lifting my head, I look him in the eyes. “I’m done, Brayden.”
“What?”
I wave my hands around. “All this? I’m done with it. I don’t want to do it anymore.”
He steps closer to me, causing me to back into the lockers, but I don’t have much room to move to. “What are you talking about?”
“What do you need me for?” I ask, holding back tears. “You got what you wanted. My dad’s giving you another shot this Friday. Our arrangement is over.”
“Kara.” He reaches for my hand, but I yank away from him. Turning on my heels, I stalk to the doors. I never left during school hours before, never cut class, never skipped lunch, but I need a break. From him. From everything.
I’ll probably be back in time for next period, but right now, I just need some space. As I march to wherever, I let the tears fall freely down my face.
Chapter Thirty-One
I wake up far too early on a Saturday morning. At 6 AM.
I try to fall back asleep, but all I’m doing is tossing and turning. Why can’t I fall asleep, darn it! I haven’t slept well all week. All because of that jerk Brayden.
Except, why do I still believe in my heart that he’s not a jerk?
No, I have to tell myself that he is, or else I’ll mourn over him for the rest of my life. I need to cut him out of my heart. But it’s been nearly a week already and I still ache when I think about him. And the ridiculous thing is that we were never even together. So I have a broken heart over something that never existed.
It was real in my mind, though. In my heart.
The best way to distract myself is to play on my phone. But I turned off my Wi-Fi and mobile internet so I won’t be tempted to look at his Spill It!. I can’t even text my friends because they’re still sleeping.
Somehow, an hour passes and then another. At 8:30, I can’t stand lying in bed anymore. Maybe I’ll find a show to binge on Netflix. I go downstairs and pour myself a bowl of cereal, but there isn’t any milk left. Maybe Dad went to the grocery.
I curl up on the couch with a show that doesn’t have an ounce of romance.
About half an hour later, Dad walks in with a grocery bag, seeming surprised to see me awake. “Hey, pumpkin. You’re up early.”
I haven’t told him that Brayden and I broke up. Even though he hurt me, I don’t want to screw up any chance he has of getting recruited.
“You were at the grocery?” I ask.
“We were out of milk.” After he deposits it in the fridge, he settles down near me. “Another teen drama?”
“No, I’m sick of those. This is a thriller movie.”
He leans back and we watch in silence.
“Dad, how was the game last night?” I ask.
I know I shouldn’t care, but I can’t help myself. I invested myself in Brayden and his cause and am dying to know how it all turned out. I couldn’t bring myself to go last night, and Dad thinks I was sick.
“I was impressed,” he says.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Just that I was impressed.”
Is he trying to turn all my hair gray? What the heck is that supposed to mean?
But I guess it doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. He got what he wanted from me.
***
“My turn to pick the next book,” Charlie says as we gather at my locker before first period.
“Okay, but nothing too complicated,” Dani says. “I’m swamped with so much work and need to use my brain cells on that.”
Ally sighs. “A Lady of True Honor was far too good.”
I laugh. “Well, I’m game with whatever. Just as long as it’s a good book.”
“Kara?” a voice says from behind me.
My friends and I turn around and come face to face with Brayden. He stands there with an uncertain expression in his eyes. But there’s something else in there, too. A bright light that can illuminate the world. Did he and Teagyn just have a hot and spicy make out session under the bleachers?
He takes a small, hesitant step toward me. “Can I talk to you?”
I should say no. Really, I should. But there’s something else in his eyes…something that makes me sigh and say, “Just for a minute.”
He nods and we walk off to the side. I fold my arms over my chest, keeping my eyes on him.
He smiles unsurely as he rakes his hand through his hair. “I’ve been recruited, Kara.”
I stare at him. “What?”
“I impressed your dad. Astor University wants me to play for them.”
A part of me wants to fling my arms around him and give him a super tight hug. Finally, after everything he’s been through, after he worked so hard and…
No, he doesn’t deserve anything from me. The only reason my dad gave him another chance was because of me.
“Congrats,” I say.
His face falls, like he was expecting me to actually hug him. Why does his expression squeeze my heart?
He moves closer. “Kara—”
“It’s great that your dreams are coming true. Good luck.” I turn around and walk back to my friends.
“Kara!” he calls after me.
“Let’s go,” I tell them.
As we march away, it takes everything I have not to look back at him. To glimpse one more time at the guy I thought he was.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Brayden
“Where’s the tea?” Bailey’s voice calls from upstairs, in her perfect British accent. “Princess Bailey is getting a little impatient.”
I smile as I place the teabag in the pot, or I try to. I don’t think I’ve given anyone a real smile the past few days, because all I’ve been feeling inside is confusion, hurt, hopelessness. Kara is no longer my friend.
I don’t know what happened between us. She’s been ignoring me, hasn’t returned my texts. I just don’t understand what I did wrong.
“Prince Brayden!” Bailey calls.
I place the teapot and mugs on a tray and carry it up to her room. She’s already sitting at the table in her Belle dress, shoulders raised in importance. “Yay!” she cheers when I walk in.
I try to give her a smile as I place the tray on the table and settle down, but it’s hard. I guess I’m not great at hiding my emotions. But I don’t want Bailey to sense something’s wrong. I want her to be as carefree as possible.
“Thank you,” she says when I pour her a cup.
She starts to slurp and chat in her British accent, but try as I might, I can’t focus on her. My thoughts are consumed with Kara and what I could have possibly done wrong. I really don’t understand. She was so excited when she came over to tell me her dad was giving me another shot. And then she totally changed. She didn’t respond to my texts and then dropped the bomb on me—she was done with our arrangement. Done with me.
I thought we were friends. No, I thought…well, I thought we might have been more than friends. But I was wrong. I started developing feelings for her, but I guess she never felt the same. For her, it was all pretend.
I don’t know how I pulled off the game last weekend. I was so distraught and confused and hurt by her actions. But I had no choice but to shove it all away. For my parents and Bailey, for Brock, and for myself. But also for Kara. Because she was there for me every step of the way. She was there when I was so broken over my bad performance at that previous game, and she was the one who raised me up. She didn’t want to quit on
me and refused to let me quit on myself. Because of her, I pushed myself. I believed in myself. Because of her, my dreams were a possibility.
She hadn’t shown up to my game. I saw her dad in the stands, but not her. It made my world collapse, but I had to push all my feelings away. Even if it took every bit of strength I had. And I had a knock-out performance.
Thanks to her, I got recruited by her dad. She didn’t even congratulate me, not really. I thought she would be happy, I thought the news might have patched up whatever went wrong with us. But she gave me a lame congrats and walked away, not looking back once.
Are she and I…over?
“When’s Kara gonna have tea with us again?” Bailey asks as she finishes her tea. “I miss her.”
I sigh as I slump forward in my seat. “Me, too.” A lot.
Chapter Thirty-Three
A few days have passed since Brayden told me he got into Astor University. I’ve been hanging out with my friends a lot, accepting their comfort. They really are the truest, dearest friends in the world. I’m lucky to have them.
Now it’s Thursday after school and I’m home alone. Dani has dance, Ally has choir, and Charlie’s got all her extra homework. And Dad’s not home, either.
The house is so quiet. So lonely. I wish Mom were here. She’d know how to help me get through this. Dad doesn’t even know that Brayden and I broke up. I guess he’ll find out eventually.
I slump around the house, too distracted to do my homework. I miss him. I miss him so much. Going to his games, seeing him practice, texting him. Hanging out. Seeing his eyes light up with a smile. Being in his arms when we danced, inhaling his intoxicating scent.
I’ll never experience those things with him again. Heck, maybe never again. Because if this is what heartbreak feels like, I’d rather remain single.