by B. M. Hardin
As she walked in my direction, she was nothing like the woman that I remembered.
My mother had been a god-fearing woman that was so full of life, love and scriptures of course.
Though she was saved, she wasn’t at all a bad parent. Of course in our opinion she went a little over board with teaching us the Gospel, but other than that, she took good care of us.
Our personal relationship was a little weird.
For some reason she didn’t communicate with me as much or as freely as she did with my other siblings. I’d imagined that it was because I was so much like her.
I looked the most like her. I had her personality and I even smiled like her, but for some reason our connection just wasn’t as strong.
Naturally, I felt some kind of disconnection with or towards her, but I still loved her with everything in me.
She was my mother; the only one that I’d been given and she could never be replaced.
“Hey mama,” I said to her as we sat down at one of the tables in the visiting area.
“You look good Tori. Thanks for coming to visit me,” she said.
I was surprised that she knew who I was.
I was shocked that she seemed to be in her right mind, and apparently it showed all over my face.
“I stopped taking the medicine. It was making my forgetful.”
I smiled at her.
I was glad that she wasn’t taking it, she didn’t need it. But I at least wanted her to have a voice of reason.
“Are you sure Mama?”
“Tori, I’m not sick. And I’m not crazy. I never have been. What your father did to me was something bigger than a broken heart. It shook the foundation that I lived and breathed on and I felt as though God had failed me in some way. So, instead of turning from him, I went searching for deeper validation and I allowed the religion and everything in that Bible to control and consume me. I guess I did come off as a little bit crazy. But I’m not crazy,” she said.
Her words brought tears to my eyes.
I wanted to hug her but I didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable.
“So, what do you want me to do? Get you out of here?”
“No, I’m fine here. I don’t have anything to go back to out there. God can use me wherever I am. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. So what’s new with you?”
The sad part about it was that I didn’t have anything new to tell her.
I really need to get a life.
***
“Maybe you should lower your standards a little bit,” Delilah was trying to give me advice on dating as though I was going to listen to anything that she said.
It was the day after Donna’s funeral and I was visiting them for the last time.
Delilah had decided to move back to Louisiana with her folks after the whole incident.
From what Delilah had told me, she and Donna had come to Washington together and now that Donna was gone, and because she didn’t have any family here, there was no real reason for her to stay.
The funeral was beautiful.
It was a double funeral for Donna and Big Ox.
I’d never been to one like that before, but it turned out to be nice.
I’d cried like a newborn baby at the sight of Donna, lying there in her pearl-colored casket.
She looked so lovely and so at peace.
All I could seem to think about was that it could have been me.
One of those stray bullets could have had my name on it and I could have been gone just like that.
And what would I have truly done while I was here? Other than my educational and career accomplishments, if you took all of that away, what was left?
Looking at her two babies that day on the front pew definitely melted my heart. They were weeping for their mother and father, but they couldn’t hear their cries.
I left the funeral changed forever in the inside.
I was going to make the most of my life from that day forward.
Delilah and I of course, promised to keep in touch, but I knew that that wasn’t going to happen.
The most that I was going to do was send cards with money for little Bryson on birthdays and Christmas’s but other than that, this was the end of the road for us.
She and her disloyalty didn’t have a place in my life as I looked towards the future.
Leaving her house for the last time, I headed outside with a smile on my face.
The breeze was cool and for some reason, I was feeling like a brand new woman.
I felt as though I was ready for whatever and for starters it was time for me to find myself a man.
A real one.
I just had to figure out where to start.
What if all men came with a warning label? Wouldn’t it make it a lot easier for us women to make better decisions with who we gave our hearts to?
But on the flip side, would women even take the time to actually read the label?
Or would they simply ignore it in hopes that the label was wrong?
I tell you one thing, and I can only speak for myself, and I would read the hell out of it.
Anything that would save me time and energy from dealing with the wrong guy was definitely worth reading.
But I was doing pretty darn good paying attention to the signs even without the physical labels.
Still in my thoughts, I walked to my car slowly, ignoring the whistling behind me.
What on earth would make a man think that any woman, in her right mind, would show them any kind of attention while they were whistling at her like she was a dog?
I guess it worked for some but it definitely didn’t work for a woman like me.
I got into my car and drove away in a hurry.
Lower my standards my ass!
I was just going to find someone that met them. He was out there, and he was bound to be found.
Life was too short, and this woman was now on a mission.
*************
Chapter Three
“I have someone for you. Let me set you up on a date,” my boss, Hunter, said as he popped his head into my office.
I eyed him questionably.
There was no way in hell that I was going to take a dating recommendation from a lying, cheating scumbag like himself.
I still believed in the saying that birds of a feather flock together, so as far as I was concerned, everybody that was a friend, acquaintance, associate, or whatever of his were liars and cheaters just like he was.
And I wasn’t going to take any chances.
I declined his offer with a smile and after pretending to listen to his point of view for about five minutes or so, finally went on his merry little way.
I sat staring at my computer and wondered if it was past time to explore the option of online dating.
After clicking on a few of the sites, I decided that I was too fine and too fly to have to go that route.
Tori, what is going on with you?
My conscious started to speak up.
Though the shooting incident had given me a reality check, and though I was a bit on edge about life being too short and I, I knew that it was risky to be in such a rush for love.
I had to calm down about it and get my mind together on the matter.
Everyone knows that patience is a virtue and that slow and steady always wins the race.
It will happen when it’s supposed to happen.
So for now, I needed to get myself together for the twenty plus interviews up ahead for a new assistant.
Here goes nothing…
With one more interview to go, I glanced at my watch.
They only had about ten minutes to get there and if they were going to be late, they may as well not even show up.
Honestly, I preferred an assistant that was always a little bit early.
Delilah hadn’t been much of a friend, but she had the assistant thing down to the tee.
She’d always done an amazing job, and she was going to be h
ard to replace.
A backstabbing, disloyal floozy with a good work ethic; now, that was something that you don’t see every day!
Just as the thoughts crossed my mind, in walks this coffee-colored stallion of a man.
Whose man is he and why on earth couldn’t he be mine?
“Hello, I’m Tristan Hall. I’m here for the interview.”
Really?
There was no way that he was here to interview for the assistant position.
If anything he needed to be interviewing to be my husband, boyfriend, boo-thang…hell anything that included him, plus me, would suffice.
“Am I in the right place?”
I simply nodded my head, unable to speak.
So let me explain what was standing in front of me.
Height guess, I would say right at six feet.
Through his impressive choice of shirt and bow tie, I could see that his body was in tip top shape.
I was positive that he had abs and everything.
And those broad masculine shoulders and big arms had a sista’ mesmerized beyond belief. I wondered if he had tattoos and how many.
Would it be extremely inappropriate to ask him to do the interview with his shirt off?
Yeah, okay, so maybe it would be.
But his body was all of that and then some.
Oh, and that smile…I won’t even go there.
As he invited himself to take a seat in the chair across from my desk, I continued to study him.
His attire, nor did his appearance give off the impression that he was unemployed; so why was he here?
“Look, I’m an honest type of guy so I’m going to keep it real with you. I know this job is for an assistant, but actually I’m here for your job…well, at least one like it.”
I smirked at his cockiness.
He didn’t stand a chance at getting my position, but I liked his enthusiasm.
I didn’t respond to him, I simply glanced down at his résumé.
If I had read it before hand, I would have seen that he wasn’t unemployed, and that he already worked in Accounting.
“So, I see you already have a job in Accounting as well. Why leave your position to come and be my assistant? That’s sort of a backwards step don’t you think?”
“I’ve been trying to get in the door with you guys for years. So, I figured that if an assistant is the only thing that this company was hiring for, if I could get my foot in the door, I’m sure that I could seek the position that I truly desired.”
A man with a plan…I like it.
As I said, we were the best in all of Washington and I wouldn’t doubt that we were amongst the top ranked in the world.
If you needed accounting services or anything to do with money and if you were of a certain status…you came to us.
It was no question.
And as he stated, we rarely hired for any top executive or high level positions being that usually people that came never left and also we promoted a lot from within our company, versus bringing in someone new off of the street.
Basically, coming in as an assistant, cleaning crew or something like that was the best way and almost the only way for someone new to get through these doors these days.
But I just couldn’t allow him to be my assistant.
Not only because I wouldn’t be able to get any work done from gawking at and drooling over him all day, but he was definitely over qualified.
His qualifications, some of them, were indeed better than my own. I simply couldn’t allow him to come in and do my light work.
But there was something that I could do.
“So, I’m going to be honest with you, I simply can’t hire you as an assistant. It just wouldn’t be right. But I do know that we have a position coming open in a couple of weeks that you would qualify for. One of our top executives will be retiring soon and of course someone will move into his spot, which means that someone will need to fill the successor’s position. Now, usually we promote from within, but there are a couple of folks that owe me a few favors around this place. So, I could hold on to your résumé and see what I can do,” I said to him.
He looked at me as if he was trying to decide whether or not he should believe that I would actually put in a good word for him.
I stared deep into his eyes to let him know that I meant business, and to also let him know that I was game for mixing a little business with pleasure.
As a matter of fact, it could be all pleasure.
Screw the business.
But he was here for a job, not a blow job; though I couldn’t wait until the day that I was able to try one.
I’d watched enough examples and in my head I was already a pro.
He would be the perfect test-dummy for the job.
Tori, get your mind out of the gutter and pay attention, I internally scolded myself.
“Cool. Thank you and hopefully they pay up on a few of those favors that they owe you…or I’ll be back,” he smiled.
He stood up, tugged on his bow tie, and extended his hand for me to shake it.
Standing to my feet, I watched him as he appraised my body while he shook my hand for a second too long.
See, he just had to have a look…he was in trouble now!
As I said, I had the whole sexy thing down to the tee and just one glance was usually all it took for a man to what to know more.
I sure hoped this one did.
We smiled at each other and then he turned to walk away.
A little disappointed, I wanted to say something but I didn’t know what to say.
I was full of words but at that moment, nothing and I mean absolutely nothing, would come out of my mouth.
Luckily, he decided to say something instead.
“So, since I didn’t get the job…can I get your number?”
Before I could even answer him, he reached me his phone and I couldn’t enter my number fast enough.
Yes! There is a God!
***
“Uh oh, I know that look,” my oldest sister Cheyanne said to me, with a grin on her face.
I rolled my eyes and continued to shop as she and her three kids followed behind me.
Cheyanne was the oldest child of my parents’ children and the one that I kind of saw as a mother figure.
She was the one that I’d always confided in and the one that I’d always looked to for advice.
Even before our mother was deemed as sick, Cheyanne was the one that I looked up to.
She was always the fun one. She was the dare devil of the bunch and the one who taught me that rules were sometimes made to be broken.
She was definitely a little on the wild side, but she’d calmed down as she’d gotten older. She was still a ball of fun to be around though.
Though she was well-educated, Cheyanne was now a stay at home mother of three and married to an ordinary, hard-working guy that was born and raised in South Carolina.
You could definitely tell that he was raised in the South, but he brought a nice Southern blend to our family.
My sister’s husband was so country that you often caught him outside with no shoes on, and he always had my sister cooking things like neck-bones, cornbread or pigs feet.
From what I could see, she and my brother-in-law were pretty happy.
I wasn’t around them as often as I wanted to be but believe me when I said that every time that I was I watched him, studied him, for signs of infidelity, just to see if I saw anything that might hint that he wasn’t as happy as he portrayed to be.
To date, I’d never seen a thing, at least not on his end anyway.
My sister was the one that he needed to keep his eye on.
I’m just saying---she had a few tendencies.
Though she’d never mentioned anything, I was sure that she’d stepped out of the marriage once or twice or at least she wanted to.
“His name is Tristan.”
“Um, that’s it? That’s all you have to say about him? You
know that you are the queen of trying to figure a man out before he even says hello, so I’m sure there is something else that you have to say about him than just quoting his name,” my sister quizzed.
I simply smiled at her and continued looking at the blouses that were in my hand.
The truth was that I didn’t know what to think about Tristan.
I couldn’t seem to figure him out, at least not yet anyway.
We’d only been talking for a few days, but so far he had been saying all of the right things.
He’d called only about ten minutes after he’d left my office. His reasoning was that he wanted to make sure that I had given him the right number.
He’d said that women today were known to give a man the wrong digits just so that they could avoid the extra of turning them down.
I liked that he was up front, aggressive and honest. He didn’t bite his tongue and he said exactly what was on his mind.
It was refreshingly intriguing.
Since that day, we talked regularly.
Well, regularly was an understatement.
We talked all the time!
I rarely had to call him because he made sure that he called me. He called me as if we’d been dating for months, and I answered every single time.
The amount of free time that he on his hands told me that he didn’t have too many attachments.
It showed that he had lots of time to spare and give to me.
He was my type of man already.
I have to admit, I wasn’t used to all of the attention and it was more than flattering.
He complemented me every chance that he got and sad some of the sweetest things that I’d ever heard.
And it was making it hard for me to have a clear head and pay attention to every little thing that he said and did.
Just a little bit.
But still yet, though it wasn’t as easy, I had my eyes open.
I was looking for the signs.
I knew that eventually something would begin to show if there was something for me to see.
I only hoped and prayed that he was as wonderful as he appeared to be.
Considering that we both worked quite a bit and that sometimes it was necessary to pull a few extra hours, finally, we were scheduled to go on our first date, soon, and I was really looking forward to it.
I wanted to see him in a different environment and in a different light.