by Annie Dalton
A family were eating breakfast in their living room. Dad in his collar and tie, Mum in her apron, plus three little kids, all politely sipping tea and passing the toast and margarine. It was like a scene from a 1940s picture book, except for one little thing. The front had been blown clean off their house.
I closed my eyes for a moment, as I remembered Reuben saying, “But what’s war for?”
Lola had both hands pressed tightly to her mouth. “Whatever kind of bomb does that?” she whispered.
“The Germans have started sending over these weird buzz bombs,” Ferdy explained earnestly. “They’re like aircraft, except they don’t have pilots. They just point them in the right direction, then when they arrive - BOOM!”
“My Great Nan called them doodlebugs,” I said. “She said the first time one came over their house, she almost wet herself.” I had a sudden thought. “Ferdy,” I said, “how come you know so much stuff about 1944?”
When Ferdy tosses his hair about, it means he’s going to say something wildly superior. “Don’t you ever use the Link?”
“Me?” I bluffed. “Never! I prefer to like, improvise.”
“Boo, you are so-o bad!” giggled Lola.
Everywhere, we saw constant reminders of the war; queues outside food shops, sticky tape over the windows, sandbags in doorways. But instead of letting themselves be crushed by all these depressing changes to their way of life, people somehow managed to spring up again like daisies which I thought was unbelievably amazing.
I don’t want you to think we were just being time-tourists. Lola and I spent hours taking care of a really good-looking fireman, while his mates dug him out from under a pile of rubble.
He was actually quite young. As Lola said, he was more of a fireboy really. His name was Stan and he’d been searching a bombed house for survivors when the roof fell in. He was in a lot of pain, but he kept up a stream of daft jokes.
Finally the other firemen lifted him free. As the ambulance doors closed, we heard Stan yell, “Tell those two pretty girls to wait for me, do you hear?”
“Poor Stan,” muttered one of his mates. “He’s really concussed.”
I immediately jumped up, tugging down my dress as far as it would go.
”Lollie!” I protested. “I can’t believe I’ve been sitting here in this little dress and Stan the fireman could actually SEE me!”
Then we heard a low growl in the distance.
“Oh-oh, I think that’s a buzz bomb,” I said.
“One flying bomb’s not so bad,” said Amber brightly.
Ferdy looked nervous. “Actually, they send them in relays.”
People were already hurrying for the nearest shelter.
The siren began its stomach-churning wail.
As the bomb came nearer, the air was literally juddering with vibration, as if it was compressing itself into some terrifying new element. I think Orlando saw how scared I was, because he suddenly grabbed my hand.
“We’ll do this the easy way,” he yelled. “Touch your angel tags and focus on the shelter. On a count of three. One, two - three!”
I obediently shut my eyes and FLASH! We were back underground, as everyone came fleeing down from the street.
BOOM! The first buzz bomb exploded overhead.
Celia appeared, looking wonderfully chic. “Chaos, isn’t it?” she said. “Let’s see what we can do for the poor dears, shall we?”
In the middle of beaming angel vibes at the traumatised Londoners, I suddenly registered that Orlando was standing really close to me. I tried hard not to dwell on the fact that he’d recently held my hand.
“How did you do that cool fast-forward trick?” I murmured.
Orlando sighed. “Mel, you really ought to read your Handbook!”
I sternly reminded myself to focus. It sounds a bit hippie-dippie, but transmitting angelic vibes in a crisis is actually just common sense. Negative emotions make it that much easier for the Opposition to home in.
For some reason I kept looking up hopefully every time a new arrival came down into the shelter. At last the stream of humans gradually slowed to a trickle, and as the third buzz bomb exploded overhead, I finally realised what was bothering me.
Molly and her mum. They weren’t here.
In an instant of total, blinding clarity, I suddenly knew Molly was in danger.
I’ve got to go to her, I thought.
Unnervingly, Orlando read my thoughts and immediately put his foot down. “You know the score, Mel,” he said firmly. “No heroes, no stars. Just links in a divine chain. Those are the rules.”
I took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. “I’m not trying to be a hero, really I’m not. But Molly’s only six and she’s all alone in an air raid. I saw her. Orlando, it’s like I’m meant to save her or something. It’s -it’s -” I searched desperately for the right words, “A genuine cosmic emergency!”
Orlando was not remotely impressed. “Remember that time outside the Sanctuary? Those agents had a cosmic emergency too. And the Opposition picked them all off like apples.”
I totally lost my temper then. “Well, EXCUSE me,” I yelled. “But I think a little girl is more important than some old rule!”
“Boo,” Lola whispered. “Everyone’s looking.”
Celia’s angels were staring in horror. It was like being back at school, only a billion times worse. Plus now even my best friend was against me.
“I know it must seem harsh,” said Orlando quietly.
“Not harsh,” I said through gritted teeth. “Inhuman.”
Orlando’s calm expression didn’t flicker. “Just get on with your work, Mel, OK?”
I stared at him. Couldn’t he see that Molly and her mother were my work? At that moment I honestly didn’t feel like I had a choice. I’d just have to take care of this by myself. I sneaked a last yearning look at Orlando. Get real, Mel, I told myself. A gorgeous angel genius and an airhead with attitude? It was never going to happen!
I didn’t try to hide what I was doing. In front of everybody, I touched my angel insignia, and focused on Molly with all my heart.
FLASH! I was outside a terrace of tall thin houses in the fading light.
A weird-looking aircraft hovered at rooftop level. Angry flames jetted out of its ugly backside. A distinctive buzz-bomb growl filled the air. Then it stopped and there was a deathly hush.
The buzz bomb dropped behind the terrace like a stone. Then BOOM! The whole world came crashing down. Jagged shards of glass, clouds of brick dust, actual bricks, half a chimney pot.
Forgetting that I wasn’t human, I instinctively dived into a doorway, then felt hugely embarrassed. Hello! You’re an immortal being? I reminded myself. Get a grip angel girl!
At the same moment I heard a scared whimper. “Mum? Mum?”
I scanned the street, until I saw a basement door swinging on its hinges.
“Hold on Molly!” I called though I knew she couldn’t hear me. “I’m coming.”
I found her crouching under the kitchen table. “Come home, Mum,” she whimpered to herself. “Please don’t be dead, Mum. I’ll make you a cup of tea just how you like it. Please don’t be dead, Mum.”
I couldn’t bear it. I completely forgot I was an angel.
“You don’t have to be scared. I’m here now,” I said softly.
But as I reached for her, I caught a stealthy flicker of movement in the hall, just the tiniest flicker, and suddenly it was impossible to breathe.
And I heard a voice so intimate that it seemed like I had known it for ever.
“Hi Molly,” it said. “Don’t be scared. I’ve come to take you down to the shelter.”
All the tiny hairs rose on my neck.
A boy was lounging in the doorway. He wasn’t looking at Molly. He wasn’t looking at anything. He was just there, smiling at some private joke.
He had bleached blond hair and the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. I remember thinking how out of place he looked in that 1940s kitchen,
in his black T-shirt and jeans, the image of this boy I’d secretly fancied at my school. Right down to those beautiful dangerous eyes.
This is so unfair, I thought dreamily. They never told me the Opposition could be beautiful.
“We can take any form we like,” said the boy softly.
He snapped his fingers like a magician. Suddenly, shadowy little creatures were swarming everywhere, blindly bumping into each other, falling into the sink. The sound they made was out of my worst nightmares - a skittery insect sound which got right inside my head.
“I’m scared, Mum,” Molly moaned.
Her voice shook me out of my panic. Call yourself an angel, Melanie Beeby? I scolded myself. This is your basic Good-versus-Evil type situation. So pull yourself together!
I deliberately stepped in front of the boy, holding out my divine insignia. I was shaking all over but I couldn’t worry about that. “Maybe I don’t look much like an angel,” I quavered, “but I’m here on official Agency business and Molly’s under angelic protection. So don’t even try to touch her, OK?”
The boy laughed. “Oh, but I haven’t come for Molly, darling! I’ve come for you!”
I froze. I couldn’t believe I had been so stupid.
I’d made it so easy for them; leaving my mates in the lurch, deluding myself I was on some major cosmic mission.
I had this wonderful new life, I thought. And I threw it away - for nothing.
“That’s right,” said the boy, amused. “And by the time we’ve finished with you, nothing’s exactly what you’ll be.” He looked straight at me, and his beautiful eyes were totally empty. “NOTHING,” he repeated.
Now I’m a girl who, if someone says I look pale, faints right on cue.
And I’m not proud of this, OK, but I immediately felt myself dissolving like a sugar cube.
It’s happening, I thought despairingly. I’m not a person. I’m not an angel. I’m no-one, I’m nothing. Soon I’ll just be an empty space. It’s all over…
Except, it wasn’t.
“Hang about!” I demanded. “What am I meant to be scared of exactly? I’ve already lost everything and everyone I care about. I’ve got nothing left TO lose. Apart from wowing me with your naff special FX, there’s not a thing you can do.” I drew myself up to my full height. “So stop wasting my time, moron!”
He blew me a scornful kiss. “Diddums. Like I actually care.”
But the Opposition’s gruesome FX were already fading like a bad dream.
“There’s the door,” I said in my snottiest voice. “Mind it doesn’t hit you in the backside on the way out.”
I turned my back as if he’d ceased to exist. And suddenly I could breathe again. He’d gone.
Given my record, I probably wasn’t the best angel to save Molly, but I was the only angel available. So I touched my angel tags, and with a WHOOSH of cosmic energy, I willed myself to become visible.
There was a gasp from under the table.
I couldn’t believe I’d done it! I’d actually materialised! I was so delighted with myself that my mind went a total blank.
What do I say to her? I panicked. Then, to my relief, vaguely familiar words floated into my head. I was only six when I played the angel in our school nativity, but it came back like yesterday. Well, kind of.
“Um - fear not!” I said huskily. “For lo! I am the angel Melanie and I have come to let you know you are not alone.”
Molly crawled out from under the table, her eyes filled with awe. Then I caught sight of my reflection in the hall and my eyes filled with awe too!
The mirror glowed with a rosy light. Inside the rosy halo was a wonderful being with wings, the kind a small terrified child would instantly recognise as an angel.
My moment of weird glory lasted all of five seconds.
Molly’s mum rushed in, her face absolutely white. “Thank Heaven!” she sobbed. She scooped Molly up in her arms and hurried out of the door.
“It’s all right, Mum,” I heard Molly gabble. “I saw a beautiful angel and she said don’t be frightened, so I wasn’t.”
My knees went to jelly with pure relief. I closed my eyes and a silly smile spread slowly over my face. I don’t think I’ve ever felt as happy as I did in that moment. I saved Molly, I thought. I really did it.
An unearthly light burst upon my closed eyelids. When I opened them, Michael was standing there. He held out his hand for my angel tags.
“I’ll have those, thanks,” he said sternly.
Chapter Ten
I‘d tried every trick I knew to get myself to sleep. I’d had a long bath by candlelight. I’d helped myself to Lola’s stash of twenty-second-century drinking chocolate. I’d listened to my favourite late-night music turned way down low. I’d tried everything and I was still as jumpy as a Mexican bean.
In normal circumstances I’d have died of fright. But angels can’t die. Not even angel failures like me.
Typically I never had got around to reading that Handbook, so I had no idea what we did instead. I just hoped it wasn’t like that depressing fairy-tale, where the little mermaid turns into sea foam.
I switched off the light and got into bed. The dark didn’t make me sleepy, though, just horribly lonely.
I padded over to the window and gazed out over the beautiful, beautiful city. Its lights sparkled like millions of fallen stars.
My eyes prickled and blurred. Don’t think, Melanie. Don’t think about that wraparound sky so blue that you can’t tell where it leaves off and the sea begins. Don’t think about Lola and Reuben, or that sweet-faced boy, Orlando. You had a once-in-eternity opportunity and you blew it.
When I first got here, I used to imagine how gobsmacked Miss Rowntree would be if she ever learned that her most troublesome pupil had been picked for angel school. I was constantly dreaming up dramatic situations where I zoomed back to Earth and wowed my old teacher with my amazing skills. “Melanie,” she’d gasp. “I’m truly sorry I misunderstood you. You had hidden depths, which I completely failed to see.” Sadly, it seemed I hadn’t changed after all -just gone round in one big dreary circle.
After I was brought back in disgrace, Michael quietly listed every one of my misdemeanours. Abandoning the other members of my team, thus putting them at risk; materialising to a human child without permission; claiming to be on Agency business when actually it was all my own stupid idea…
I’d broken so many celestial rules, it was probably some kind of record. I couldn’t blame the Academy for wanting to throw me out.
“It’s out of my hands,” Michael had said quietly. “The Academy Council will deal with you in due course. Until then you will not be permitted to leave the school grounds.”
He’d looked so disappointed, I couldn’t bear it. At that moment, I’d have given anything to be human again because then I could just crawl off and die.
The weird part is, I didn’t regret what I’d done. Once I had that moment of clarity in the tube station, I had to do what I believed was right; even though it later turned out to be totally, totally wrong.
It’s like, up until that moment I’d just been playing a beautiful magical game, called Angel. But the instant I walked away, that was when it became the real thing.
I hadn’t seen any of my mates since I got back. Our entire class had gone off on an end-of-term jaunt to some exotic wildlife park. The dorm was totally dead, and I preferred it that way. I totally couldn’t face them after what had happened. By the time they came back, it would all be over. I’d be sea foam, or whatever.
I caught sight of my stricken face in the mirror.
“We were meant to be the three cosmic musketeers,” I whispered.
Now I’d never go time-travelling with my friends, or learn to send dreams to suffering humans like Orlando.
“Stop torturing yourself, Mel,” I said aloud. “Try to get through the night with a bit of dignity, OK?”
I’d been summoned to appear before the Council early next morning. But I was so n
ervous that I got there way ahead of time.
“I don’t think they’re quite ready for you, Melanie,” said the school secretary, avoiding my eyes. “Perhaps you’d care to take a seat.”
She probably despised me, but I was simply too numb to care.
Get used to it, Mel, I thought drearily. In ten minutes you’ll be a fallen angel, the lowest of the low.
The chamber door had gorgeous stained-glass panels. I sat staring at it for so long that I could have literally drawn it from memory. From time to time I heard raised voices. There was a major debate going on inside. I caught glimpses of swirling robes as various archangels swept past.
I’d never met any archangels, apart from Michael. But Lola once told me they made space aliens seem almost cuddly.
Desperate for comfort, I reached for my angel insignia to reassure myself, but my hand closed around air.
Suddenly I seemed to hear Lola’s voice. “What are you doing, angel girl, sitting there like a total turkey? DO something, girl!”
“Yeah, Mel,” Reuben teased. “Put your Houdini powers into reverse and stay put for a change!”
It was like my best friends were actually with me in the waiting room!
“OK,” I whispered. “I will.”
And I stood up, tugged down my skirt and knocked on the door.
There was no answer, so I took a deep breath and went in.
With so many archangels in one room, the light levels were truly awesome. Michael was there, to my relief. And from what I remembered of our angelic history lessons, I guessed I was also looking at Gabriel, Raphael, Uriel, Jophiel and Chamuel. Just don’t ask me which terrifying face belonged to which archangel.
The archangels stared back, appalled.
I willed my jelly knees to hold me up.
“I don’t mean to be disrespectful,” I croaked. “But you’ve got to let me stay. You’ve just got to.”
The secretary rushed in. “I am so sorry,” she panted. “I distinctly told Miss Beeby to wait outside.”
“That’s quite all right,” said a remote voice. “We’re most interested to hear what she has to say for herself.”
I closed my eyes and tried hard not to think of sea foam. “Um,” I said. “First, I want to let you know, that I do realise I really messed up badly.”