by Amy Sparling
I step inside and look around. This room is bigger than my mom’s master bedroom. It’s probably bigger than my dad’s entire apartment. It has its own bathroom with a clawfoot tub and marble shower, and the walk-in closet is like a dream. One wall of his room is also open to the world below, made of glass.
“Aren’t you scared people will see inside?” I ask. “With binoculars or something?”
He reaches over and flips a switch on the wall. A gray screen descends from the ceiling, slowly lowering over the windows until they’re blocked off from the outside world.
“Nice,” I say. I look around at his room décor, which his mostly dirt bike trophies and dark wood plaques that he’s won in amateur racing series throughout his life. He has a king-sized bed with sheets so crisply tightened and tucked in that only skilled a maid could have pulled that off.
“Your life in Roca Springs is a lot different from your life here,” I say.
He nods. “My life is, I guess. But I’m not. I’m still me,” he says as he approaches me, sliding his hand down my arm. “All this wealth is my dad’s, not mine.”
“Didn’t you just sign a contract?” I say, smiling to cover my extreme feeling of unworthiness. “You’re kind of rich now, too.”
His tongue slides over his lip while he watches me, those intense eyes pouring into mine. “Let’s not talk about that stuff, okay? I’m in the bubble with you. I just really want to stay there.”
I wrap my arms around him and rest my chin on his chest. “Okay,” I say peering up at him. “Back into the bubble we go.”
14
Liam
I’ve spent my entire life training to become a professional motocross racer. I’ve been disciplined like an Olympian. I eat right, I work out, I stay away from alcohol or drugs that would ruin my health. I train, and train, and train. I work hard to get what I want.
But when it comes to love? I’m a total screw up.
I’ve flirted with a girl here or there, and even had a few sneaky make out sessions in the dark shadows of a motocross race. I’ve been on a date or two. None of it was serious. None of it mattered because as far as I was concerned, dating of all kinds would only ruin my motocross training.
I’ve screwed up badly with Bella. She’s not just a summer fling. Not just a girl with a pretty smile and a great body. She’s something more. Over these last few months, she’s become the most important person in my life.
For the last eighteen years, I was the most important person in my life. I did everything for myself, to improve my life, and achieve my goals. Now, it’s her. She’s all I care about. I do still want my career, and Team Loco is an incredible opportunity that I can’t pass up, but Bella is on my mind, all day every day. She consumes me. I don’t want to leave her.
I know this is bad, but I don’t care. In this moment, when she’s standing here in the superhero shirt I bought her, with the lights of the city making her eyes shine while she stands in my bedroom, she’s all I care about.
I lift her chin up to mine and kiss her softly. A soft sigh escapes her lips as her body melts against mine. It’s been a long day of walking and exploring the comic convention, and now I just want to lay down. I circle my arms around her waist and lift her off the floor. She giggles, her lips pressed to mine, and I take a step backward until I sit on my bed, pulling her down with me.
“Whoa, this is a soft mattress,” she says, sliding her hand down my comforter.
“Oh yeah,” I say, falling back on the bed. I stare up at the ceiling and stretch out my limbs. “This bed is so much better than that crap I’m sleeping on at my mom’s house.”
Bella lays back, her head hitting the pillow next to mine. “I’m scared to ask how much this bed costs.”
I laugh. “I don’t even know. My dad bought it.”
She turns on her side, facing me, and I turn to face her. “It’s like when we Facetime,” she says, grinning. “Only in person.”
“Yeah, on Facetime, I can’t do this—” I reach out and slide my arm around her hips and tug her close to me. Our bodies are just inches apart now. I bring my arm up her back and slide it through her hair.
Her lips slide into an easy smile, her eyes closing as she lays on my pillow.
I continue to caress her hair, my fingers trailing down her back and up her arm, and then to her cheek.
I lean in and kiss her. Her whole body awakens to my touch, and soon she’s wiggling closer. Our legs tangle together and her breath hitches as our kisses deepen and grow more passionate. I pull away, leaving her breathless as I move to kiss her cheek, her neck, her collarbone. Her hands tangle in my hair, pulling me closer, always closer.
I know it’ll only lead to pain, but I need this girl in my life.
Desire takes over, and my hand trails down to her hips, my finger sliding over that smooth skin just above her waistband.
My whole body floods with heat, passion, desire, as she holds the back of my head, kissing me with all that she has.
My hand slides up her side, reveling in the feel of her smooth skin. My thumb touches her bra. She freezes.
I open my eyes.
Bella’s watching me, her expression like a deer in the headlights, “Maybe that’s too much,” she breathes, as she moves back an inch.
I move my hand. “Sorry.”
She shakes her head. “No, it’s okay… it’s... fine.”
But I can tell it’s not fine.
“Bella, I’m sorry. We can stop.”
She sits up and smoothes her shirt down. “I just don’t know if we should do this—” She bites her lip, and the guilt on her face sends my heart tumbling. “It’ll only end badly, you know?”
I nod. “It’s okay, Bella. I promise. We can stop.”
Her palm slides across her forehead and she groans. “Ugh, I feel like such an idiot.”
“You are not an idiot,” I say. I kiss her hand while it’s pressed to her head.
“It’s getting late. I should take you home.”
She nods eagerly, and I smile and try to be lighthearted. I don’t want her to think she’s made me mad by stopping something before it went too far. She didn’t. She’s right, actually. We shouldn’t have taken things any farther—not if we want to keep our hearts intact when this summer is over. Bella fidgets awkwardly on the elevator ride back down to the parking garage, so I start telling her a funny story of my childhood when I got stuck in these elevators. It makes her laugh. I know things are still weird, but at least they’re better.
When we get to my truck, I pull open the door for her.
She stops and gives me a cute smile. “Aren’t you the gentleman.”
I shrug and return her grin, doing a silly little bow. “Only the best for my lady.”
As we pull away from downtown, I can feel our metaphorical bubble stretching thin. It’s easy to disappear into another city for the day and pretend that we’re the happy couple we look like on the outside. But eventually, all bubbles pop, and ours is closer to that deadline than ever.
I look over at Bella while I drive. Not ten minutes on the highway, and she falls asleep, her head resting on the window. She looks so serene. Happy.
We have two weeks left of summer.
I don’t know how I’ll leave her when the time comes. But for now, the bubble is still there. There’s still time to be with this girl who has captured every inch of my heart. And I’m going to stay here as long as I can.
15
Bella
I wake up with a sharp pain in my neck. My eyes open slowly and I sit up, realizing I had been squished against the passenger door of Liam’s truck. We’re still on the road, but I recognize the area. We’re just outside of Roca Springs.
I sit up straight and rub my neck. “Sorry. I guess I fell asleep.”
Liam turns down the radio. “No worries. We’re almost home, but I’m starving. Mind if I stop and grab something to eat?”
“I’m hungry, too,” I say. “Let’s stop at that di
ner.”
“Even better,” Liam says as he puts on his blinker and slows down. “I wasn’t ready for our day to be over anyway.”
It’s no longer daytime. In fact, it’s late at night, but I agree with him. I’m not ready for this one perfect day to be over. Tomorrow we go back to the real world, where superheroes don’t exist and we’re once again reminded that summer is almost over.
The diner is a classic truck stop place from the seventies and I don’t think it’s been remodeled since then. I’ve been here dozens of times with Kylie, and sometimes with my dad because he loves diner food. My mom prefers cleaner restaurants that don’t smell like stale coffee and burnt eggs.
Liam and I slide into a booth at the far end of the restaurant, and we’re clearly not the only teenagers who had the same late-night dinner plans. The place is packed with younger people, and a few older trucker guys. I don’t recognize anyone from my school though, and no one recognizes us. It’s a small blessing, and it means we get to stay in our bubble together while we eat dinner.
“I’m really sorry for freaking out earlier,” I say as I pour a French vanilla creamer packet into my coffee.
“Seriously, Bella. No worries at all.”
I look up at Liam. I trust him with my life, but I still feel so awkward about tonight. It could have gone far. It could have gone all the way. I know a huge part of me wanted that—wanted him. And maybe it would have been fun and maybe I could have moved on after summer and not had my heart destroyed. But I don’t trust those maybes. I need to protect my heart, and keeping my clothes on is step one in the line of defense.
Our waitress defies the small-town diner stereotypes. Instead of some middle-aged woman with lots of makeup, who calls us “sweetheart”, she’s actually in her twenties. Her long brown hair flows loosely around her shoulders in a way that’s probably not complying with local health codes. She’s wearing jeans and a polo shirt with the diner’s logo on it.
“What can I get for you guys?” she says with a heavy Texas accent. Okay, maybe that part fits the stereotype.
I order the blueberry pancakes with bacon and Liam orders the French toast with hash browns and bacon and a Dr. Pepper to go with his coffee.
“You needed a little caffeine to go with your caffeine?” I tease him.
He grins and flicks his wadded up straw wrapper at me. “Don’t hate. I like coffee for before my food and soda for when I’m eating.”
“So sophisticated,” I say, tossing the straw wrapper back at him. “Your palate absolutely defines class and dignity.”
“That’s why you love me.”
He’s just playing around, but that word hits me straight in my core. Love.
I know I don’t love Liam, not right now. It’s too soon… we aren’t official… I know all the reasons I don’t love him.
But I could love this boy.
All it would take is the flip of a switch. The impossible becoming possible. In a different reality, where he wasn’t some famous motocross racer but just a regular guy, I would love him. And maybe it’s the mere thought of it that’s making my heart race and my stomach feel all floaty.
Liam places the straw wrapper in his spoon and then flings it across the table at me. I hold up my hand to deflect it, but it lodges between my index and middle finger, making it look like I’m some kind of quick reflex ninja.
“Nice,” he says.
The waitress brings our food, ending our war of the balled up straw wrapper. I don’t know if I’m just super hungry, or if this place makes the best pancakes ever, but they’re delicious. I try to eat slowly so I don’t look like some gross slovenly eater in front of Liam, even though I tell myself it doesn’t matter. I can look gross and slovenly right now. He’s leaving soon, so why do I still want to impress him?
Being a woman is hard.
“Do we want to hit the track tomorrow?” Liam asks. Unlike me, he’s already devoured most of his French toast in record time.
“Yeah sounds fun.”
“I’ll probably suck since I had to take an unplanned two weeks off,” he says, grimacing.
I laugh. “Your version of sucking and my version of sucking are very different things. I’m sure you’ll be great.”
“I should really step up my training now that I’m on Team Loco. I have to prove my worth this season.”
“You’ll prove it,” I say with full confidence. “They’re lucky to have you.”
He meets my eyes and we share a quiet moment that takes on a more serious tone. Even though motocross is what bonded us to each other, talking about it now feels more than awkward. There’s a tension in the air when Team Loco is mentioned. How is it possible that this sponsorship is the greatest thing ever, yet also a dagger through the heart of our summer relationship?
“This is just my luck,” I say, trying to make light of the situation. “I finally find a motocross guy who likes me and he goes off and gets famous and ruins it.”
Liam shakes the hair from his eyes. He grins. “How do you think I feel? I met the girl of my dreams and now I have to leave her behind.”
My whole body warms. I look down at my food, focusing on the one lone blueberry that rolled to the other side of the plate. “I doubt I’m actually the girl of your dreams…”
“How would you know? You haven’t seen my dreams.”
I roll my eyes, trying very hard to keep this lighthearted. “You’re a charmer, you know that?”
His smile widens and I can see his shiny white teeth. “Only around you.”
I take a deep breath and plunge my fork into a slice of my pancakes. I need to change the subject. This is too deep. Too real.
I glance over at the wadded up straw wrapper from before. “Whoa,” I say, setting my fork down.
I pick it up and turn it over. “Is it just me, or does this look exactly like Squidward?”
“From Spongebob?” Liam says, his brows drawing together. He squints and then reaches for it. “Wow… it does.” He examines it further. “It’s uncanny.”
I laugh and reach into my purse for my phone. “I need a picture of this or no one will believe it.”
Liam sets it on the table for me to photograph. I unlock my phone and see a long list of notifications. Crap. When’s the last time I checked my phone? I think it was back at Comicpalooza when we were taking photos with superheroes.
My smile fades as I see my mom and Brent’s name on my phone screen. I’ve missed dozens of texts and calls from them.
“Uh oh…” I breathe.
“What’s wrong?” Liam says.
I scroll through the messages, all of them asking where I am and why I haven’t answered their calls. My phone was on silent and I didn’t realize it. The last text from my brother says: Mom is freaking out and wants to call the cops. Where the hell are you?
“This is bad,” I say. “My mom and brother are worried because they can’t get ahold of me.”
I check the time. “Oh god… it’s past midnight. They’ve been trying to reach me for hours.”
Liam curses under his breath. “Bella, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even think about the time. Let’s go, I’ll get you home.”
I text my mom and Brent back and tell them I’m fine and I’m almost home.
“It’s okay,” I say. “We can finish eating. They’re already mad… what’s an extra ten minutes going to do?”
Liam doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t look like he agrees with me.
Brent is the first to reply.
Brent: Thank God you’re okay.
Me: I’m fine. I just lost track of time. Sorry!
Brent: Tell that to Mom. She’s pissed.
I exhale and push my plate away. These pancakes might be amazing, but I’m not hungry anymore. I look up at Liam. “I think our bubble has officially popped.”
16
Liam
Bella’s eyes have doubled in size. The blood has drained from her face as she sets her phone down.
“You
okay?”
She shrugs and stares at her half-eaten food. “Brent said my mom is mad. I was having so much fun today I totally forgot to check in with them. And now I’m trying to think of how you’re going to drop me off without them knowing I was with you since they’re probably both watching the front window like hawks.”
“It’s okay,” I say. “They know you’re safe now. They’ll calm down.”
She shakes her head. “My mom, maybe. But not Brent. He’s been waiting for me to screw up.”
I take out enough cash to cover the bill and a tip and I leave it on the table. “Let’s go,” I say, reaching for her hand.
She takes it, and she holds my hand all the way back to my truck. I open the passenger door for her and she gets inside, finally releasing my hand. There’s something final in the way she lets go of me, like she’s already putting distance between us in her mind. The last time I held my truck door open for her we were joking around and having fun. This time the feeling in the air is exactly the opposite of fun.
I hate this. I wish Brent would just hear me out, forgive me, and trust me with his little sister. Things would be so much easier if not for the dark cloud of Brent Castro hanging over Bella’s head. Sometimes I wonder what our relationship could be like if she wasn’t always worried about getting in trouble with her brother.
The drive home is filled with nervous silence. I don’t know what to say, so I keep my mouth shut. Bella fidgets with her seatbelt and her purse and her hair, unable to keep still.
“You should drop me off a few houses down,” she says when I turn onto her street.
“No,” I say. “That only makes you look guilty.”
“Maybe I am guilty,” she says, looking out the window.
“Guilty of what?” I say. “The only thing you did wrong was forget to check your phone.”
She gives me a look. “You know it’s more than that. I spent the day with you… if my brother finds out, I’ll be dead.”