by Beth Wiseman
She blinked a few times, tears shining in her eyes, and once again Dalton wished he could hold her, comfort her. Her emotions were all over the place, and he loved that she was so transparent. He wondered if she would exceed his expectations in other ways as well.
“And I’m sure my dad is upset that I left right after I got there.”
“I bet he understands, though. And don’t be sorry. You can’t control what Brendan does. I just feel bad for you, that he keeps doing these things that upset you.” He reached over and touched her hand. “And I don’t have any regrets about asking you out. None.”
They both scanned the menus, then opted to share an appetizer tray and some chili con queso.
“Please tell me it gets easier.” Alyssa leaned back against the seat and met his eyes.
Dalton took his hat off and put it on the bench beside him, something he should have already done. “Excuse my hat hair.” He paused, scratched his chin. “Yeah, it definitely takes a while to feel normal again.” He picked up a chip and broke it in half. “But, if it makes you feel any better, I can look back now, and I know that Pam wasn’t the right person for me. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I was devastated when she broke up with me. And, just like you, I was embarrassed, which only adds to the hurt.” He shrugged as he dipped the chip into the little bowl of salsa. “But when the breakup is fresh like this, it’s hard to see all the reasons that you really weren’t meant to be together.”
“Like what?” Alyssa bit her bottom lip. “Is that too nosy? It’s okay if you don’t want to say.”
“She never cried.” He blurted it out, then instantly wished he hadn’t.
Alyssa closed her eyes and leaned her head back. “Well, I’m certainly making up for that today.” She looked back at him and sighed. “Sorry.”
“No. Don’t apologize. It just shows that you’re human, that you get sad and feel things. When I say Pam never cried, I mean never. I’d be struggling not to choke up during a sad movie, and she never even came close. Now that I think about it, I never saw her cry the entire three years we dated, and that kind of bothered me. Plus, she was a vegetarian and spent a lot of time trying to get me to convert.” He smiled. “The thought of being with her the rest of my life without a cold beer and burger on my back porch, well . . .” Shrugging, he added, “But I loved her, and I would have stayed with her—oh yeah, and, she only wanted one child. I want a big family. There were just a lot of things I pushed to the side while we were together, thinking that love was all we needed.”
Alyssa waited as the waitress put the bowl of spicy cheese dip and the appetizer plate on the table. “That was one thing I loved about being with Brendan. We wanted exactly the same things. We both wanted to live right here in Fayette County, in La Grange. Brendan wanted a place in the country, and the little house he’d put a deposit on was a step in that direction. We were both taking online college classes. We both wanted a big family.” She waved a hand in the air. “I could go on and on.” Her smile was sad. “He was my best friend too.”
Dalton could almost feel the love Alyssa had for Brendan radiating from her. He didn’t think Pam had ever loved him like that. “He was a lucky man.” Dalton paused. “Maybe you’re making a mistake by not trying again with Brendan.” He held his breath, but let it out when Alyssa started shaking her head.
“A part of me will always love Brendan, I guess. But I was so sure about us. About everything. I never doubted that he loved me. I thought we were so perfect, that we knew each other so well. I could have never imagined we would spend a year planning a wedding and then he’d do what he did.” She avoided his eyes as she dipped a chip in the queso. “I don’t trust him anymore.”
Dalton didn’t have an answer for her. He reached for a nacho and tried to think of something intelligent or comforting to say. “Maybe this isn’t the right time to say this, but . . .”
She raised her eyebrows as she munched on a chip.
“I’ve always had a crush on you, but I got bad vibes from Alex whenever I mentioned that to him. I don’t think your brother thought I was good enough for you.”
Alyssa let out a light laugh, which was nice to hear. “He was like that about Brendan in the beginning, and . . .” Then she looked up, a twinkle in her eye. “You had a crush on me? Wow. I always had a crush on you too. But I didn’t think you noticed me.”
Dalton couldn’t help the warm feeling that wrapped around him, but he told himself to be careful. He knew how much Alyssa and Brendan had loved each other. And though he hadn’t had that kind of relationship with Pam, she’d hurt him just the same. He planned to stay one up on this situation. If a relationship developed with Alyssa, he needed to protect his heart.
“Really? I had no idea.” He searched for the right thing to say, but instead he just blurted out what came to mind. “Are you afraid of getting hurt again?” He laughed. “Dumb question. I guess I worry about that. I know I’m a guy, and I’m supposed to be all tough and everything, but I don’t think my heart could take another blow.” He tried to make light of the comment, smiling even though it was true. His heart couldn’t take it . . . nor his ego.
“I definitely feel that way.” She was smiling now too. “So what are we doing here together? Why’d you ask me out?” She held up a finger, then went on. “And why did I accept? If we’re both so afraid of getting hurt again, then why put ourselves out there?”
Dalton picked up his hat, put it on his head, and slid out of the booth. “Yeah, you’re exactly right.” He tipped his hat at her. “I’m sure you can find a ride home.” He took about three steps before he turned back around to see the look on her face. Then he burst out laughing as he slid back into the booth and took his hat off. “Gotcha.”
Alyssa laughed, a good hearty chuckle, and Dalton reached across the table to put his hand on hers. “No matter what happens, laughter’s good for the soul. Let’s just laugh, have a good time, and take things one small step at a time.”
She smiled. “I’m totally good with that.”
Brendan thumbed through photos from the past two years with Alyssa. She was a stickler for actually printing out the pictures as opposed to just keeping digital versions on their phones or a computer. “Someday our children will want to look through photo albums, and no one puts pictures in albums anymore,” she’d said.
He picked up a picture from their first trip to Galveston. They were standing on the beach with the ocean behind them and huge grins on their faces. Brendan’s face looked out of proportion because he’d had his arm outstretched to take the picture himself. But it had been a great day, the first of many beach trips. Alyssa used to roll down the car windows to smell the ocean before they could even see the coast.
In those days he would never have predicted he would be alone in his room, pining away for what was.
As he flipped through the photos, he wished he could go back in time. For the past couple of months, he’d believed his over-the-top stunts would make her see how much he loved her, how sorry he was, how they belonged together. But today for the first time he’d seen it in her eyes—she was done with him. And the sting of seeing her with Dalton had only added to Brendan’s misery. He’d spent every extra dollar he had and every spare minute trying to make up for hurting her and to get her back. But today he’d embarrassed her and hurt her even more.
“Brendan?” His mother knocked on the door, then walked in before he could put the pictures away. “You okay in here?”
He’d told her plenty of times not to just walk in. “I’m fine, Mom.” He started putting the pictures back in the box, each one reflective of the life he could have had with Alyssa.
“You’ve got company. Alex Pennington is here.”
Brendan took a deep breath. “Tell him I’m not here.”
His mother stepped to one side as she pushed the door open to make room for Alex. “Sorry, hon.” Mom shrugged as she closed the door behind Alex.
“If you came to yell at me about the plane,
save your breath. I already know it was a stupid thing to do.” Brendan swung his legs over the side of the bed as Alex took a seat in the chair against the wall. Alyssa’s brother had the same dark hair and eyes as Alyssa, but his features were sharp and defined, unlike his sister’s softer ones.
“Yeah, you’ve done a lot of stupid stuff.” Alex grinned. “But, I’m here because we need to do something about Dalton before this thing with him and Alyssa takes off.”
“What?” Brendan sat taller. “Dalton’s your best friend. I figured you’d be thrilled to see him with your sister.”
Alex frowned. “Yeah. He’s my best friend. And I love the guy. But I don’t want him with my sister.” He sighed. “He’ll end up hurting her. And besides, everyone knows she still loves you.”
Brendan hung his head. “I don’t know about that, Alex. Today Alyssa told me straight out that she doesn’t love me anymore.”
They were both quiet for a few moments, then Alex smiled. “A woman’s heart is a funny thing.” He pointed a finger at Brendan. “And you are doing everything wrong to win her back. Right now, Alyssa knows she can have you back. What if she thought she couldn’t? What if she thought you were moving on the way she thinks she is with Dalton?”
“I’m not gonna play games with her, Alex. She’s the only woman I’ve ever loved, ever wanted.”
Alex threw his hands up. “Then why did you back out at the very last minute? It had to have been more than just cold feet.” He dropped his hands and stared at Brendan. “Look, I was at the bachelor party, and as bad as some of the guys were talking about their wives, that wasn’t it. I know how much you love my sister. And I know about, uh—about your family situation. There was something else that caused you to freak out.”
Brendan sighed as he recalled his and Alyssa’s wedding day, how beautiful she’d looked as she walked toward him. But if he told Alex what he’d seen that day, it might wreck other lives.
“Just really bad cold feet,” he finally said as he avoided Alex’s eyes.
“Everyone says that’s normal. But I gotta say, I never expected that from you.” They were both quiet. No one could make Brendan feel any worse than he already did.
“What do you want me to say, Alex? I messed up. And I can’t control who Alyssa goes out with.”
“Well, that’s a shame. Because Dalton uses women. I’ve seen it.”
Brendan frowned. “He was with Pam Herring for years. That doesn’t sound like a guy that bounces from woman to woman.”
Alex shrugged. “Pam looked good on his arm, and she was good in the sack. But Dalton wasn’t faithful to her. I know of several times when he cheated on Pam.” He grimaced as he scratched his head. “Look, Dalton is basically a good guy, and he’s my friend, but well, you know.” Alex shrugged. “I just don’t trust him to date my sister.”
Brendan would have preferred for Alex to plead his case based on Alyssa’s love for him instead of just focusing on the negatives about Dalton. But he couldn’t stand the thought of Dalton touching Alyssa—especially since he knew that Alyssa was waiting until she got married. At least that had been the plan, and they’d both been committed to it. But was Dalton handsome and persuasive enough to change her mind?
Brendan’s stomach churned, knowing he wasn’t done fighting for her.
Alyssa gently cradled little Monroe Broderick Modenstein Junior. Nine pounds, two ounces, twenty-two inches long. And with a full head of dark hair like his father.
“I can’t believe how gorgeous he is.” Alyssa passed the baby gently to Dalton, then moved closer to Sherry. “Where’s Monroe?”
“He left right before you and Dalton got here. He was hungry.” Sherry blew a strand of hair from her face. “I don’t know why he’s so famished. I did all the work. Twenty-six hours of labor.” She made the sign of the cross. “Thanking my almighty God and Father for every drug given me throughout this ordeal.”
Alyssa glanced at Dalton. He looked so natural holding little Monroe as he rocked him back and forth in his arms. Then she turned back to Sherry and grinned. “I thought you weren’t going to have any drugs?”
Sherry reached for her purse, which lay on top of the bed covers, and began digging around in it. “They forced me to take something for the pain.” She shook her head. “I didn’t want to, but they made me.”
Alyssa stifled a smile. From the waiting room they’d all heard Sherry wailing and begging the nurses to fetch the doctor and bring her something for the pain.
Sherry pulled out a compact, opened it, and frowned at her reflection before she turned to Alyssa. “Some kind of friend you are. Why did you let me eat myself into a fat person while I was pregnant?”
Alyssa didn’t understand why this revelation was presenting itself now, but she just shrugged. “You’re right. I should have pried those double cheeseburgers from your hands. And the double orders of fries, the chocolate shakes, and—”
“Enough.” Sherry held up her palm to Alyssa, then turned her hands over and wiggled her fingers. “Now, give me my precious little boy.”
Dalton eased the baby into Sherry’s arms. “He’s not that little. Bet you’ve got yourself another football—”
“Hey, babe. Got your food.” They all turned as Monroe walked into the room. He put the carry-out bag on the bedside table and began to unpack it. “Double cheeseburger, double fries, chocolate shake, just like you ordered.”
“As always, my beloved, your timing is perfect.” Sherry turned to Alyssa and raised an eyebrow. “Not a word from you, missy.”
Alyssa bit her lip to keep from laughing.
“We should probably go and let you eat.” Dalton reached for Alyssa’s hand. They’d been going out every weekend for the past month. Today they’d decided to spend the entire day together.
Alyssa hadn’t seen Brendan since the day at Monument Hill, and even though she would have never admitted it to anyone, she’d frequented a few places she knew he went, hoping to just bump into him. But Dalton had been keeping her distracted, and she hoped that with each day she would think less and less about Brendan.
Each of their outings had ended with a hug and a quick kiss, mostly because Alyssa hadn’t been ready for anything more. But something about a man and a baby . . . Watching Dalton handle Monroe was bringing on some unexpected feelings.
“What do you feel like doing?” Dalton opened the door of his truck. Alyssa eased herself up on the seat and slid closer to him than she usually did.
“Hmm.” She tapped a finger to her chin as he started the engine. They’d been doing the dinner and movie thing the past few weeks. “I don’t know.”
“We could, uh, go to my house, watch some TV or something.” Dalton put the truck in reverse, then glanced her way. He’d mentioned it before, but Alyssa had always had an excuse.
She pulled her hair loose from its clip and let it fall below her shoulders before she rolled down the window and closed her eyes. The chilly breeze slapped at her cheeks as Dalton shifted gears and picked up speed.
Dalton was everything she’d ever wanted in a guy—good looking, charming, and polite. Everyone loved him. And he’d been so patient. He really seemed to understand what she was going through. Maybe it was time to loosen up a little—with some ground rules in place, of course.
“Sure.” She slowly opened her eyes and turned toward him. “I’d love to see your place.”
Fifteen minutes later Dalton turned onto a gravel road and then, almost immediately, into a long driveway. Alyssa’s emotions swirled and skidded as they bounced toward a tiny farmhouse and pulled up in front.
She pulled her pink cardigan snug as Dalton helped her out of the truck. It was unusually cool for October. Dalton put an arm around her as they walked up the porch steps. After he unlocked the door, he pushed the screen door open and stepped aside for her.
“Wow. I’m impressed.” Alyssa had been inside this house before, back when Mr. and Mrs. Shelton owned it. But it didn’t look at all the same. The
clapboard walls were painted a light tan, and the red couch really made the room pop. There was a plaid recliner in one corner next to a small table, and a big flat-screen dominated the opposite corner. For an old farmhouse, the place had a really modern feel to it.
“Thanks,” he said. “I did the work, but I guess I have to give Pam credit for the decorating. She’d come from school and stay with me on the weekends.” Dalton put his keys on the coffee table as if what he’d just said didn’t have an ounce of meaning. But for Alyssa it was confirmation that Dalton and Pam had done a lot more than she or Brendan ever had. She tried not to think about it as Dalton pulled her into his arms.
The feel of lips brushing against hers wasn’t something new. There’d been other guys, other kisses, even before Brendan. But for the past two years, it had been only Brendan, and one thing her former boyfriend had excelled at was kissing.
There was an urgency in the way Dalton kissed her, and Alyssa waited for the tingling in her stomach to spin into a wild swirl of passion, for her pulse to pound in her chest, for her knees to go weak as they did when Brendan kissed her. But as Dalton pressed against her with a hunger she wasn’t familiar with, something just felt off.
Assuming it was her and not him, she tried to kiss him back with the same passion. But as he pulled her closer, it was becoming obvious that he hadn’t brought her here just for a few kisses.
Dalton could feel himself trembling as he pulled Alyssa closer, kissing her the way he’d only dreamed about. He longed to go further, but she eased away from him. “Sorry,” he whispered before he drew her back to him. He would have to take things slow with Alyssa, but he couldn’t help but wonder how long Brendan had waited before he’d slept with her. Dalton didn’t want to push her, but he’d wanted her for a long time, and it would be hard to wait too long. He forced his mouth from hers, pushed back a strand of her hair, and waited until his pulse got back to normal before he said anything.