"Anyway," she continued in a bitter tone. "I can’t help what he feels. I don’t love him and I am not getting back together with him.”
Steve looked at Deborah for a long time without speaking. How could he explain to her that for him to become involved with her now – it would be like Steve was taking Sarah from David all over again. It didn’t matter that it was over for her, as long as David still wanted her…
“Yeah, well, apparently he still thinks that there’s a chance.” Steve muttered, bending over his latest report and hoping she would take the hint that he was done discussing her and David’s relationship.
Deborah started to speak again, but Steve held up his hand to stop her. “Deborah, you’ve had your say. It won’t change anything. Please go now.”
Deborah’s eyes welled up in hurt and frustration. David’s unwanted appearance and Sarah’s death had opened too many old wounds. The hope that the moment in the cave had given her faded. “At least reconsider your transfer,” she asked dully. “David was home on emergency leave for the funeral. He will be leaving today and returning to Okinawa. There won’t be any more scenes.” She turned and left his office, wiping stray tears as she hurried out past the reception desk.
Steve remained in his chair, staring blankly at the papers that lay scattered over the desk in front of him. At last, he picked up the envelope that contained his transfer letter. Despite what he had told Deborah, he hadn’t actually sent it in yet. Steve looked out of the window at the ancient Saurotan Mountains. The beauty here still took his breath away at times. She was right. He did love it here. Perhaps he should wait awhile…He slid the envelope into the desk drawer, and sat rubbing his throbbing temples. He’d been inside too long. He needed to get out and get some exercise. Rappelling maybe – go out to the Wall…
An hour later when his shift ended, Steve hurriedly collected his gear and set off across the campsites toward the loop trail. He set a brisk pace as he began to climb the steep path, and felt some of the tension begin to drain away immediately.
There had been a moment as he strode past the Graham’s trailer that could have been unpleasant, but Steve had seen the rental car just in time. Apparently David was back in the park for a farewell visit. He cut a wide berth around the side of the trailer and quickly disappeared into the trees on the far side of the road, just as he heard a painfully familiar voice calling out “Good bye”, and the Graham’s replies. For a moment Steve wondered if Deborah was there to see him off too, but quickly thrust away the thought. It really didn’t matter. He stepped into the trees just as David cruised past the trailhead by the amphitheatre. Resolutely, Steve turned away and focused on the trail ahead, ignoring the urge to look back through the trees to watch David finally leave Hanging Rock for good.
As always on the mountain, Steve’s spirits began to lift as he pushed his pace up the steep trail. His thoughts went back to the night only a few weeks ago, when he and Chuck had jogged this same trail in the dark, searching for the lost camper from site 42. Stupid inexperienced kid, coming up here without a buddy, Steve thought. At least he had registered at the trailhead.
It had been a close thing. Shane Davis would probably not have survived until morning. They had heard recently that the boy would make a full recovery, although Steve doubted that Shane would be free climbing on any cliff walls in the future. His injuries had been severe – several broken bones, a punctured lung and internal bleeding – it was amazing that he had even survived the fall.
Steve was breathing hard by the time he reached the trail marker and turned off onto the side path that led to the same cliff he and Pete had taken Deborah to last month. As the trees opened out, Steve paused and took in the magnificent view of the valley and surrounding mountains. Slowly, Steve sat down on a fallen tree trunk and allowed the peace of the mountains to fill him. After awhile he realized that he was smiling. He closed his eyes and listened to the sounds around him. A faint breeze stirred the leaves, rattling them softly on their branches. A sparrow called a plaintive warning to some animal in the trees behind him. Steve could hear the occasional crackling of dry twigs, as something moved stealthily in the trees beyond his sight. Maybe a wild turkey, or possibly a fox, he thought, checking out the human for a change.
Feeling much more relaxed, Steve unpacked his gear and prepared to make his descent. He tested the rope and anchored it carefully. At last, he stepped to the edge and leaned back, allowing himself to arc out over the valley. He swung back to the rock face and proceeded to bounce away from the wall in a series of small arcs, dropping smoothly until he was nearly halfway down. He rested against the cliff face enjoying the panoramic view.
“Why are you still alive?”
The accusation rang out and echoed around him. Braced against the stone, and preparing to push off again, Steve froze and peered up to the top of the cliff. “Who’s there?” He called in confusion. Surely he had misunderstood the words…
The voice came again, irritated and insistent. “You should be dead!”
This time he knew it. David had somehow followed him. “You should have died that night,” David yelled. “Not my sister!”
Steve squinted up toward the top of the cliff, trying to make out what David was doing. “I wish it had been me, David!” He yelled back. “You’re right, and I would do anything to change what happened.”
Silence filled the air. Steve continued squinting up into the sun. “David?” Was he still up there? He tried again. “I’ll climb back up,” he called. “Wait for me, David. Can we at least talk about this now?”
David would not reply, but Steve caught a movement, the silhouette of a figure peering over the side. Pebbles showered down. Steve stared back uneasily, suddenly wondering if David would push something bigger, and if he could dodge a rock dropping at him from out of the sun. Suddenly, Steve felt a faint tugging on the rope. It gave slightly. He broke out in a sweat. Surely David wouldn’t cut the rope…but the tugging continued, and Steve was certain that that was exactly what David was doing.
Desperately, Steve kicked off, arcing out into space then back to the rock face. He glanced down, gauging the distance to the ground. It was still a long drop, but one more release and he would be down! He pushed off again, once more arcing far away from the rock. Just as he reached the apex of the swing, Steve felt the secure tautness of the rope disappear. David had managed to cut through the heavy nylon, and Steve realized with a sick feeling that he was free falling. For a long moment it seemed as if he hung there, as if he had a choice, but the moment vanished and Steve plummeted straight to the ground below.
David watched the rope fall loosely over the side, knowing Steve would now be lying broken and crushed, just as Sarah had been in that ditch. He had dreamed of doing something like this for years now. He smiled slightly at the image in his mind, and then turned slowly away. Somehow he had always thought he would feel elation at this moment, but instead, all he felt was emptiness.
Emptiness, but no regret. He walked back up the path without looking back.
Ch 12
Search
Deborah rapped on Steve’s door for a third time, waiting impatiently. Was he still avoiding her? She stood on tiptoe and peered through the small window in the door, but the room was dark. Nothing seemed to be moving. At 7:30 in the morning, it was unlikely that he would already have left for work; besides, his old white truck was still sitting in the driveway.
Deborah sighed and brushed her hair back with her fingers. Not even eight o’clock yet, and it was already uncomfortably warm. Reluctantly she turned away and trudged back to the her own truck, where Laurie, one of the other three female rangers who worked at the Lake, sat in the passenger seat, plaiting her long brown hair in a neat French braid while she waited for Deborah. She glanced sideways at Deborah as she slammed the truck door and turned the key in the ignition. The frown on her face pretty much said it all.
“He still won’t even answer the door, huh?”
Debo
rah ignored the obvious question, as she stepped heavily on the gas and kicked up a rooster tail of gravel as she shot down the service road. Unperturbed, Laurie completed her braid, wrapped a black elastic tie around the end and began to pin it in up on the back of her head. She smiled sympathetically at her friend. “Be patient, Deb. He’s always been a moody one. He’ll get over it.”
Deborah grimaced. “It’s all my fault! I should have told him about David and me. I should have known that it would matter to him.”
Distracted by her thoughts, Deborah had to step hard on the break as they came up to the intersection. The truck to lurched to a halt rocking both of the girls forward in their seatbelts. Laurie caught herself with a hand on the dash, and gave Deborah a long silent look of reproof. Deborah ignored her outwardly, but she proceeded more slowly as she pulled out onto the main service road.
Laurie expertly slid another bobby pin into her to anchor her braid. “You’re too hard on yourself,” she advised her friend. How could you know that all this would happen so suddenly? I mean, you two aren’t really even dating, after all.”
“Well, there’s the rub,” Deborah sulked regretfully. “We weren’t, but we could have been. Now, when I want to be there for him, he won’t have anything to do with me.”
They pulled into the parking lot above the lake, and Deborah guided the truck into its usual parking spot. The two girls slid out and walked down the path that led to the pavilion. It was still fairly cool under the trees, and Deborah stopped to inhale the pungent scent of the pine boughs before making her way to the snack bar. Laurie paused too and sighed. “It’s so peaceful! Hard to believe it will be crawling in campers in about an hour!”
“It’s going to be another scorcher, too,” Deborah agreed with a sigh.
Laurie gave her friend a withering look. “Like you’re not going to be working in air conditioning?”
Deborah grinned. “Yes, but it’s such hard work to keep the ice cream and water bottles stocked!” She told Laurie with an exaggerated air of suffering. “The campers buy everything in sight! I tell you, it’s exhausting trying to keep up with the demand.”
“Poor thing!” Laurie exclaimed in mock sympathy. “I’ll think of you while I’m patrolling OUTSIDE on the nice, sunny beach. I’ll probably get sunstroke!”
“Want to trade?” Deborah offered.
Laurie grinned. “Not a chance! See you later!” She waved airily and sauntered around the building to the beach.
The morning proved to be every bit as busy as Deborah had predicted. Overwhelmed by the oppressive heat, many campers abandoned their hiking plans in favor of the cold waters of the lake, slathering on gallons of suntan lotion and downing bottle after bottle of soda and water, as well as several boxes of ice cream bars. To her chagrin, Deborah found her joke about keeping the snack bar stocked was no joke after all. The customers kept her busy all morning.
Around 2:00 Pete stopped in to buy his customary ice cream before going off duty. She had gotten in the habit of taking her break with Pete when he stopped by, and after the busy day, she was especially glad to see him. Deborah smiled wearily. “How’s it going?”
Pete shrugged and wiped beads of sweat off of his forehead. “It’s going better now that I’m off from work.” He scanned the depleted display case in disappointment. “Got any strawberry éclairs left?” He asked without much hope.
“I saved you one,” Deborah replied. She dug under a pile of orange popsicles and pulled out his favorite ice cream bar. She handed it to him as she walked around the counter to join him at a table.
Pete grinned in appreciation. “That’s my girl!”
“Anything for you,” she said smiling back.
“Really?” He asked, sliding onto the bench across from her. “Then, how about a movie and dinner this weekend?”
Deborah was caught off guard. “Oh, Pete! I, ah….” She stuttered, searching for a kind reply.
Pete broke in. “Don’t worry,” he reassured her. “It’s true that I like you. I think you know that by now, but this is ‘just friends’. It’s been a rough week and I just thought you deserved a break. No pressure, I promise.”
Deborah sighed and smiled at her friend. “Why are you so nice to me?”
Pete smiled back and raised an eyebrow. “You want the truth? I know you are interested in Steve, and if it works out for the two of you, fine, I’ll be happy for you.”
Deborah blushed a little at his words. She supposed everyone knew how she felt about Steve by now. “But..?” She prompted in a small voice.
Pete grew serious. “But to tell the truth, as much as I like Steve, he’s not exactly ready for a relationship. Not to mention, he is not a practicing Christian.” Pete leaned closer to her. “What I’m hoping is that one day, you will wake up and realize that you want a relationship with a man of faith. And I will be first in line if that day ever comes.”
He drew back and took a bite of his ice cream and smiled at her. “However in the meantime, you’re pretty good company and easy on the eyes. So I ask you again: “How about dinner and a movie this weekend?”
This time her reply was genuine. “I’d really enjoy that, Pete. Thanks.”
Static bursts of white noise from Pete’s radio interrupted them. Pete acknowledged the dispatcher, and both he and Deborah listened with frowns of concern to the report. He clicked the button and replied, “On my way.” And hooked the radio back onto his belt.
He looked at Deborah. “It’s not like Steve to skip work,” he said quietly. “Got any ideas where he would be?”
Deborah shook her head. “He told me he was going to put in for a transfer yesterday,” she confided to Pete. “But I can’t imagine he would simply walk off the job.”
“I’m going to meet Chuck at his bungalow.”
“I tried to talk to him this morning about 7:30, Pete,” Deborah told him, her concern increasing. “His truck was there but he didn’t answer the door, and the place was dark.”
“Hopefully he hasn’t found a new hiding place for the key then,” Pete said, heading up to the parking lot.
By the time Pete reached the bungalow Chuck had already found the key and was just coming back outside. He shrugged at Pete’s questioning gaze. “Nada. His uniform from yesterday is still there, tossed on a chair. The house is empty.”
Pete placed his hand on the hood of Steve’s truck. “The engine’s cold. I don't think he’s used it today.”
Chuck locked the door to the bungalow and joined Pete in the drive. Pete was frowning at his watch. “Why’d they wait so long to check on him? His shift is almost over.”
“Simple,” Chuck answered. He had a doctor’s appointment this morning, so they weren’t sure when he’d be back. He was going to just work half a day.”
“Couldn’t he still be there?”
Chuck shook his head. “That’s why we’re worried. The doctor’s office called the reception desk an hour ago, wanting someone to contact him and have him call to reschedule, and also to inform the office that he never showed up for the appointment, which is odd, because they expected to release him to return to full duty. I can't believe he'd just skip it...” The two men stared at each other thoughtfully.
“When was the last time anyone even saw him?” Pete asked at last.
Chuck shrugged. “He’s been keeping to himself lately. I don’t think anyone has spoken to him since he got off of work yesterday around 4:00.”
Pete nodded. That was true. They had all been giving him his space since Sarah had died. “His truck is here, so he probably didn’t go to town at all. He’s been avoiding all of us since Friday…could be he went hiking on the trails…”
Chuck nodded. “True, but apparently not on a popular trail – seems like a camper would have found him by now if anything happened to him on the loop.”
Pete looked up suddenly. “Unless he went off trail!”
Chuck rolled his eyes in disgust. “He could be anywhere! We’re going to have to ca
ll the dogs in again if we don’t find him soon.”
“Let’s go back inside and check for his gear. If he took rappelling gear, it will narrow the search.”
Chuck headed back up the steps shaking his head in disbelief. “That’s a long shot, Pete. He knows better than to go rappelling alone.”
But a thorough search of the house indicated that was exactly what had happened. The rappelling gear was missing, along with his hiking boots and day pack. Pete and Chuck stared at the uniform tossed on the chair. “I don’t think he slept here last night,” Pete said uneasily. “Deb said she came by this morning and the place was dark. He didn’t answer the door.”
“Indian Face is the nearest decent,” Chuck agreed. “We should probably start there.”
Pete shook his head. “Not Indian Face. He likes the Knife Edge descent better. Last month he took Deborah and me to an isolated waterfall. He might have decided to go out there and be by himself.”
A low rumble met their ears as they headed for the truck. Chuck glanced up at the murky western skyline. “Great.” he muttered. “Another afternoon thunderstorm, by the looks of it. No point in calling in the dogs. They won’t get here before the rain washes away all the scent.”
Pete stared at the advancing line of clouds. “I’ll grab my gear. If we push it we can make the Wall before the storm hits.”
“And get soaked, ‘cause if we’re wrong, there’s no way we’ll make it back before this lets loose,” Chuck agreed glumly. “If he’s not hurt when we find him, he’s gonna wish he was,” he grumbled. “This is not my idea of fun.”
Ch 13
Second Chance
He wasn’t dead. Not yet, at least. Steve wasn’t sure whether this was one of Reverend Graham’s miracles, or a glimpse of the hell that was waiting for him. The only thing he really knew for certain was that pain was everywhere.
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