A day will dawn when the generations to come will judge our actions and deem each involved innocent or guilty. I want them to know that I, a lowly foot soldier, only followed orders forced on me by my betters. I ask for forgiveness for my part in the death of so many innocents.
The time is getting late, and the air is ice cold. Another night, praying I keep from freezing and wishing I see Kamama in my dreams.
Ezra Burchfield
Private, US Army
Chapter Twenty-Five
Heath sat reading the diary most of the night. He recognized a thread, which spanned almost two hundred years, connecting himself to Ezra. Guilt, regret, and love were all elements of a soldier’s life in every generation—no matter the mission. Every soldier with a conscience always carried the cost of war.
He could never erase the mistakes of the past. John was dead, and so were those Afghan women and children. No one knows the true number of the other innocent people who were caught in the crossfire. The Taliban were notorious for using villagers as shields for their own cowardly purposes.
Just as Ezra had worried if Kamama would accept him, Heath wondered the same thing about Grace. On the last page was an entry from the day Ezra asked for Kamama’s hand in marriage. He wrote how he’d gotten sick with nerves, thinking the beautiful woman loathed him. She surprised him by saying yes. Heath smiled as he read Ezra’s joy in knowing he’d spend the rest of his life with the woman he loved.
Early morning sun filtered through the windows of the barn. He raised his head to the sound of footsteps and saw Bruce coming toward him. His large frame had shrunk as of late.
“Grace went over to Molly’s house last night. Something about eating gallons of ice cream and watching chick flicks. I didn’t ask for more details.” Bruce laughed as he lowered himself onto a hay bale.
“I’m sorry for hurting your daughter. I don’t know what happened. Tyler wouldn’t let go, and I just snapped.” Heath ran his hand through his too-short hair. Bruce was the closest thing he’d ever had to a father. He hated knowing he’d disappointed him.
“Grace is a strong girl. She knows you didn’t mean to hurt either her or Tyler. My daughter has always forged her own path, but along the way she lost her identity. You appreciate Gracie for the wonderful person she is on the inside and accept her without condition. That, son, is a precious gift.” Bruce wiped a tear from his eye. “She wants you to know she still loves you.”
I am the luckiest man in the world. His chest expanded with emotion. “Tyler was right about one thing…I can’t promise her a secure future like he can.”
Bruce crossed his arms. “Loving someone and wanting to build your life with them can be scary. And you’ve spent so much time avoiding that very thing. I know you don’t want to hurt her or disappoint her, but don’t go using your fear as an excuse to run away.”
“How could she still want me?” He still didn’t understand why Grace chose him over Tyler.
Bruce leaned forward, resting his arms on his legs. “I’m gonna give you a bit of advice. You’ll never accept love until you learn to love yourself. Take some time. Grace will wait. You can put money on it.”
Heath nodded. “I need to leave the ranch. I know you have the cattle auction coming up—”
Bruce raised his hand. “The Montgomery boy has been asking me about a job. He’s from a ranch family and can take over the position starting tomorrow.”
“Thank you,” Heath choked out. Leaving the ranch and the Murray family, a family he considered himself apart of, would be tough.
“Before you go, I should tell you that we’re putting up the ranch for sale. I’ve been diagnosed with early stage MS. Joslyn wants to see the world with me while I still can. Grace, of course, took the news pretty hard.”
His words jabbed a blow to Heath’s gut. He glanced over at Bruce’s large, calloused hands, which still seemed indestructible. Maybe the doctors were mistaken. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t feel sorry for me, young man.” He chuckled. “I got plenty of life left in this ol’ body. The sale of the ranch has me losing sleep. But we have no choice. At some point, I won’t be able to work and good medical care isn’t cheap.” Bruce sniffed. “I broke Grace’s heart when I told her the property won’t stay in the family.”
Taking Bruce’s arm, he helped him stand. What would the sale of her beloved ranch do to Grace? Her family’s land was her identity. True Horizon stood as testament to a dream realized by a former soldier and his Cherokee bride.
An idea floated into Heath’s head, and he almost laughed out loud with delight. The solution was so simple. “Bruce, I owe you a lot. You took me in when I was on the path to destruction. I want to repay you for your kindness.”
“You don’t owe me anything, son. You’ve earned your keep.”
Heath patted Bruce on his broad back. “I owe you more than you’ll ever know, sir. Remember the inheritance I told you about. Well, let me make a suggestion.”
****
As Grace entered the Sunrise Café, her mind slipped back to the day she’d seen Heath for the first time. She could picture him, slumped over the counter, shoveling food into his half-starved frame. Back then, he’d seemed so lost. But he’d saved her life, and his act changed the direction of both their futures. If she could go backward in time, would she do anything differently? She knew in her heart and soul she would fall into the river all over again. Grace slid onto a worn stool by the counter.
Mabel handed her a menu. “Hello, sweetheart. How you doin’?” She poured coffee into a white cup.
Grace smiled at the woman’s strong Texas drawl, who as far back as she could remember, had served coffee and good advice from behind this very counter. “Oh…I’m doing all right. I’m sure you heard my wedding’s been canceled.”
“Not much I don’t hear.” Mabel returned the coffee pot to the warmer before taking out her order pad from her apron front pocket. Then, she withdrew a pen from the center of the gray bun topping her head. “If you ask my humble opinion, you did the right thing. You belong here, in Liberty Ridge. In your soul, you’re a small-town country girl.”
“I took a long time to figure out Liberty Ridge is where I want to stay.” Grace laughed. “Can I get a spinach omelet, please?”
“Two eggs or three?”
“Two.”
“Comin’ right up, darlin’.” Mabel went to the pass-through to give Grace’s order to the cook before turning her attention to three old-timers who had taken seats down the counter.
As she sat and waited for her meal, she wondered what Heath was doing. Two days ago, he’d moved off the ranch, only leaving behind a short note. He’d asked for her forgiveness and said he needed some time away to work on himself. He ended the note by declaring his love and asking for her patience.
His empty bunkhouse had left her disheartened. She’d turned on him when he needed her the most. He’d sensed her fear, which had driven him away. Would he really come back, or was he gone forever?
“Hi, Grace.”
A quiet voice interrupted her musing. Grace turned to see a petite blonde standing next to her. Her defenses automatically rose, and her appetite plummeted. “Hi, Colleen.”
“Mind if I join you?” Colleen’s eyebrows arched over wide, baby-blue eyes.
Grace sighed. Surely, acting nice to Colleen wouldn’t kill her. “Okay. How about we grab a booth?” She pointed to a small, corner booth.
After they were seated, Colleen picked up a menu. “I don’t know why I bother looking at the menu since I always order the same thing.”
A grin tugged on Grace’s mouth, and she let the expression bloom into a real smile. Both she and Colleen were now adults. Time she started acting like one. “I know what you mean. I order the spinach omelet every time.”
Colleen set the menu on the table and leaned forward. “Grace, you know I’ve been seeing Heath on a regular basis. Because I’m his doctor, I can’t talk about his sessions, but I do care ab
out him as a friend.”
Guess she shouldn’t have let down her guard so soon. “A friend?” Grace leaned back and crossed her arms over her chest. No way would she sit here and listen to how friendly Colleen wanted to get with Heath.
Color spread over Colleen’s cheeks. “He’s a good-looking man, but I’m his doctor. And he’s obviously very much in love with you.”
Now, warmth spread through her body. “Have you seen him recently? I mean, in the last few days?”
“He stopped by my office yesterday. He’s deeply committed to his recovery and wants to earn your trust.”
Grace lined up the fork, knife, and spoon set before her on the table. “I was frightened when Heath attacked Tyler.” Her guilt over her reaction weighed heavy on her heart. “He was so different than the gentle man I love.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself.” Her expression softened, and she leaned forward. “No one this side of sainthood can be in a relationship with someone suffering from PTSD and not feel some kind of fear or doubt. You’re only human, and what Heath is going through can be very destructive if left untreated.”
“I should stick by his side, especially when he needs my support. Instead, I sent him running away.” She pulled out a napkin from the silver holder and dabbed at her eyes, and then blew her nose.
“You’ve given him something priceless—motivation. He will return, Grace, and when he does, he will need your honesty.” She nodded. “Let him know if something he does or says hurts you. Help him build his self-awareness, which in turn will slowly develop trust between you.”
Hot tears stung her eyes again, and she tried hard to contain them.
Colleen reached across the table and took hold of her hand. “In the past, we’ve had our problems, but I’d really like to be your friend. Alex told me about your dad and the ranch. You have a lot to deal with.”
“A woman can always use a good girlfriend.” She liked the mature version of Colleen, who seemed to care about others instead of ripping them down. Grace’s smile overpowered her tears. “Dad’s illness came as quite a shock. And selling the ranch, well, it’s only a piece of land. I’ll learn to deal with the loss if the money will help my dad. Maybe someday, I’ll buy a small farm of my own.”
“I’m glad you’re staying in town.” Colleen sniffled. “You always seemed so happy at True Horizon.”
Mabel came over to take Colleen’s order. “Nice to see you two ladies finally gettin’ along.”
Both Grace and Colleen laughed. Ten years ago, Grace would’ve rather eaten with pigs than sit at the same table as Colleen.
“You play cards?” Colleen asked after Mabel left. “I’m inviting a few people over for a weekly poker game.”
“Sounds like fun. My card game has been reduced to playing SOLO with my nieces.” She laughed, again. A good feeling after the emotional turmoil of the past few days. Grace set her elbows on the table and rested her chin on her folded hands. “I’ve got to warn you, though, I’m obnoxiously competitive.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Grace stood by the fence of the south cattle pasture, the early autumn breeze blowing warm on her face. Tens of dozens of Longhorns dotted the rolling hills and filled the air with their lowing. She thought back to the day Dad told her they’d found a buyer for the ranch. She was heartbroken when she learned an investment group made the winning offer.
At first, Grace bristled at the thought of bankers operating their ranch. But once Dad explained the investors made the deal on the condition a member of the family stay on to manage, she’d cooled off. She could live at the house and manage the ranch while her parents would have enough money for travel and Dad’s medical care. The best of both worlds.
Grace’s parents left for their big trip a little over a month ago. Yesterday, she received a short email, assuring her they were all right. Attached was a picture of her mom and dad sitting on top of a truck. A herd of elephants stood behind them.
Even though she missed them terribly, Grace was happy for her parents. Over the past month, she worked with the investment fund manager to make upgrades to the ranch. She’d overseen the start of a major barn remodel and replaced large chunks of old fencing. The only thing missing in her life was Heath.
Grace meandered back to the house. Alex and Jenny were working in Mom’s flower beds. They’d come over for the day, mostly to give the girls a chance to run around and play with the animals.
Passing by the stables, she heard the sounds of the horses call to her. Time spent exploring the ranch on horseback would lift her sullen mood. “I’m taking out Silver for some fresh air,” Grace called out to Jenny, who knelt in a flower bed with a handful of dried-up weeds.
Jenny glanced up and waved. “It’s a beautiful day. Enjoy.”
Grace went to the stable and saddled her favorite horse. Silver nuzzled Grace’s neck. The horse got a kiss on the nose in return. “Come on, girl. Let’s go for a ride.” As she led the horse through the gate and into the pasture, she took a deep breath of pure country air. The weather was perfect. The sun shone bright in a cobalt blue sky. Small, white puffy clouds floated leisurely above her. After years of searching—searching for her place in this world—home was where she’d always belonged.
Despite the warm temperature, she’d put on a flannel shirt. Heath had left it behind in the bunkhouse, along with his dog tags. In bed at night, she’d wear the shirt and imagine him by her side.
The ranch wasn’t the same without him. She missed the sound of his laughter and the way his hazel eyes sparkled with mischief.
Silver trotted to a small hill and halted at the top.
Grace surveyed the rolling pastures and shallow creeks. She could see her family’s house in the distance. As much as she loved the ranch, True Horizon would never truly feel like home without the other half of her heart.
****
Downtown Liberty Ridge lay quiet as Heath rode his motorcycle along Main Street. He traveled over the Hickory River Bridge, and then turned right and headed out of town. A nervous flutter settled in his stomach throughout the fifteen-minute ride to True Horizon Ranch. After more than a month apart, would Grace slam the door in his face? He wouldn’t blame her if she’d given up on him.
From what Bruce said in his last email, Grace was happy managing the ranch’s daily operations. She had no idea he was behind the investment group.
For the past three weeks, he’d lived in Austin. The quirky town was a good fit for a man in transition. He drove to Liberty Ridge twice weekly for his appointments with Colleen. Her approach to therapy made him a believer. She was tough when she needed to be but also gentle and understanding. He learned and practiced coping techniques during every session. With Colleen’s help, he discovered a strength and determination that he’d thought he’d lost.
His progress was nothing short of a miracle. For the first time, he allowed himself to believe he could have a wife and children some day. His scars would always be there, but his wounds were healing. They’d lost most of their sting.
The long, gravel driveway stretched out before him. He passed under the metal arch reading True Horizon Ranch. A refreshing lightness filled his chest. He was home. The white farmhouse’s rambling form beckoned him forward. He parked his bike and made his way up the front porch steps. After standing before the front door for several minutes, he gathered the nerve to knock. He heard no sound from the other side. Guess no one was home. Just as he was turning to leave, the door opened.
“Hey, man.” Alex opened the creaky screen door. “Good to see you. Come on in.”
Heath stood transfixed on his spot on the porch. “Umm…hey. Is Grace around? I need to talk to her.”
A huge smile spread across Alex’s face. “About time.” He grasped Heath’s hand in a firm handshake. “She went out riding. Should I saddle a horse for you?”
The thought of getting on a horse made his skin prick cold with sweat. His urgency to see Grace drove away all other fears. “Sure. Gu
ess I’m willing to risk my life in order to get to her.”
Thirty minutes later, Heath sat uncomfortably astride a massive, black horse. He could’ve sworn Alex had chosen the largest, meanest-looking horse. Must be payback for breaking his sister’s heart. He clung to the reins and, after a brief test of wills, steered the horse onto the trail.
Bruno, the beast underneath him, snorted.
If he had to guess, Grace would be at the little meadow with the pond where they’d shared a picnic. Under the cover of tree branches, he shivered, most likely from anticipation. Gravel crunched underneath the horse’s hooves and the sounds of bird songs filled the air. His urge to throw up grew with each step toward the meadow. For so long, he’d dreamed of the moment he’d see Grace again. Reality might be tragically disappointing. As he fought to regain control, he reminded himself that he’d stormed into armed buildings and faced down suicide bombers. At what point had he turned into such a coward?
Suddenly, the field came into view. He noticed Silver first, then Grace, sitting in their spot by the pond. She wore his old flannel shirt, which had kept him warm on many nights in Afghanistan. Looks like his shirt had found its way into the light as well. He dismounted and walked toward her, his footsteps crunching over the grass.
Grace lifted her head and shielded her eyes from the sun.
Something looking like relief flashed in her brown eyes. He sat beside her, totally unsure of what to say.
“Hey, there.” In her hand was a long piece of saw-grass, which she spun around her finger.
“Hey.” He met her gaze and smiled. Warmth spread from his heart, through his chest, and filled his body. His love moved inside him like a hurricane waiting to be unleashed, but he held the force in check. “I want a chance to make things right. I’ve made so many mistakes.”
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