by Judy May
It’s been pretty interesting so far today. This morning Ro and I were up first and she raced off on her bike to the current location to help Bob organise the move to this one, which left me wandering the grounds alone again.
Determined not to turn into The Bird Lady Of The Grange, I went exploring. There’s a tiny one-room cottage with two cobwebbed windows sitting behind the rose bushes, which you can’t see from the main house thanks to the tall hedge. An idea came to me that maybe it would be a good place to go and write my journal once the hordes arrive tomorrow. Just as I was tugging away at the latch, a hand appeared from out of nowhere and landed on mine. I nearly jumped out of my body with fright as I’d been so lost in thought that I hadn’t heard a soul. It was Stephen, looking extra geeky as he had bed-head to beat the band and glasses on that are even worse than mine, (his Dad probably didn’t see reports about possible blindness through contact lens abuse the way mine did).
At first I was furious, assuming he was trying to stop me looking inside the cottage, but then I realised he wanted to help. The door was wedged closed by a bent-over nail, which puzzled Stephen as he insisted that he’d stored a broken chair inside the cottage only last week. I suggested that maybe Bob had asked Ro to do it for safety. After five minutes of trying to wrench it free using stones, bits of wood, and even the arm of his glasses and my fountain pen, we gave up and headed away from the cottage.
Stephen didn’t say anything at all as we walked back towards the hedge. The silence thing is getting a bit creepy. I suppose he doesn’t think I’m worth talking to, which is nuts because he talks to Paul and my brother is certainly no conversational prize. And it can’t be that he’s nervous of me because he’s known me for years, since I ran around dressed head-to-toe in yellow and purple. I even used to have a pencil-sharpener collection that he knows about. That could account for it, actually.
Not that I mind, it’s just annoying when someone who isn’t as cool as you are doesn’t like you. And there are precious few people less cool than me so it feels like a bit of a waste.
As we walked closer to the main house we started to hear loud noises like a clunking of metal. We stopped a moment to listen and then we heard people screaming and both started running back there as fast as we could. Luckily it wasn’t a case of ‘murder by metal things’, they were shrieks of excitement from Lorna and Alice (and I suspect Alex) when several large rails of costumes arrived with one of the wardrobe attendants and some lifting-guys.
Until that moment I hadn’t wondered or worried about the costumes, but now I realized that this was what people would see me in, what NICK would see me in, for days on end.
OK, Alice has just fled from the sitting room with Lorna right after her. My guess is she saw people arrive.
LATER
I was right. Amber, Bonnie, Hanna and my cousin Sophie all landed here together for the fitting and all of us girls ran upstairs to the new female extras’ wardrobe room (one of the first-floor bedrooms) where the wardrobe girl was still working away arranging things. There are so many rails of costumes, all labelled and being ironed with some kind of high-pressure steam-jet thingy, which I’m sure has a proper name.
The dresses looked stunning, all silk and chiffon, empire-line and floor-length. We hoped we could try on everything in sight, but Lizzy had given them our photos, heights and shoe sizes from the other day so a costume had already chosen for each of us.
I was resigned to looking the worst, as usual, but because of my height I was wearing a dress from the women’s section of the wardrobe department and not the girl’s section and it looked way better than any of the others. It fitted perfectly. I was told by Wendy (the wardrobe girl who is only about twenty), that it was originally made for a lead actress in a TV movie a couple of years ago and they just spruced it up a bit with an underskirt and dyed it lilac. Apparently they always recycle costumes from movie to movie, altering pieces as they go.
Lorna looks really odd in a dress, as if it’s one big itch for her, but Hanna looked amazing – very different, but very lovely, and I think she knew it as she was grinning even as the heavy make-up came off and the newly dark-brown hair was uncovered from under her beanie. Sophie, Alice, Amber and Bonnie all look good, but their costumes are a bit ordinary compared to the others so Wendy says she’ll fix that by tomorrow.
The shoes were another matter. They hurt. No wonder people died sooner in those days, they wanted to leave the planet to get away from the constant foot pain they were in. Wendy says that the trick is to bring sneakers onto the set, have your shoes in a draw-string bag and then change into them at the last minute, and that I could put my glasses in there at the last minute too. She wanted to have me wear this hat thing, but I begged her with just my eyes and she put it away with a smile, and replaced it with this large hair-ornament that she came across in some box. It looked like a plain, silver, spidery shape with lots of glass blobs, but she bent it so two of the prongs could fasten in my hair and spruced it up with a ribbon covering the glass bits so it’s not so shiny, and added two feathers and now it looks amazing. She then tied a similar piece of ribbon around my wrist and it really works. Wendy in wardrobe is going to be a very cool person to have around.
Once we were sorted Wendy disappeared next door to fit out the guys.
As we reluctantly, and not so reluctantly (Lorna), got changed back into our usual clothes everyone was telling me that mine was the best and I was trying to tell them great things about theirs, but I couldn’t help smiling all the same.
Pretty soon we could hear Gussy at the top of his voice going, ‘You have GOT to be joking! I play football you know, give that to Alex!’ and Paul who was obviously dancing about the room la-la-ing the tune to an old-fashioned waltz.
Lorna and Hanna suggested we peep in at the keyhole, but the rest of us didn’t think we could ever recover from such a thing in our own lifetimes. Good thing we nixed that plan as we met Nick and the other three guys coming up the stairs, but they didn’t have time to talk as they were late for the fitting. I think the others are called Owen and Pete and Fraser, but I might have that wrong because they are from Paul’s class in school and don’t come round to the house much. Nick avoided eye-contact with me completely when he said ‘Hi’.
Stephen invited the others to hang out here after the fittings and they’re around until tonight so the place has that summer camp feel. I am now hiding out in my window-sill nook in the library and can hear the guys and Lorna, Hanna and Alice next door in the billiards room. I am determined not to go and find Nick, he can come and find me. I think he still owes me an apology for the dance thing. And a social life. And a year or two.
LATER STILL
It’s about eleven at night and I know this means I’m going to be exhausted in the morning, but I don’t think I’ll sleep until I get it all out.
I thought this was going to be one of the best days ever and it turned out to be awful. It was exactly like that Christmas when I wanted a puppy and got pyjamas and a lamp. Of course I waited endlessly for Nick, or anyone, to come looking for me, and they all just left me alone reading in the library. Soon my leg fell asleep from sitting in an appealing-looking position. Honestly! I could have slipped down a well or been knocked unconscious by a falling jar of goose grease in one of the pantries, but they wouldn’t have found me until I was inches from death and then they’d have had to sit quietly around the billiards room with Alice crying and all of them saying lovely things about me. OK Lemony, reel it in! Point being, they totally didn’t miss me or want me around.
I was pretty miserable by the time the gong sounded in the hallway for dinner. Because there were so many of us Miss Higgins had pizzas delivered. I tried to get in a good mood again, but you know what it’s like when you’ve been sulking for ages, it’s hard to just snap out of it because it feels like someone owes you something first.
Before long the sixteen of us were in the large basement kitchen with veggie pizzas, a sound system and a
real party going. Professor Brown looked in and seemed surprised to find anyone in his house, but soon remembered and, nodding and smiling, went back upstairs to his more civilised existence. My dark mood lifted slightly, but not enough that I was talking or dancing much. Ro and Alice both came over and gave me a hug, I know they think it’s because of Nick and Donna, but really it’s just that I feel like I never really fit in. It’s fine when it’s just a handful of people, but as soon as there are loads I feel as if I am all wrong somehow, a lemon hanging from an apple tree.
The eight who aren’t sleeping here left a couple of hours ago and we ‘Grangers’ as Ro says the rest of the film crew has started calling us, went up to bed. Before undressing I suddenly remembered that I’d left this in the window nook in the library and considering how I’d go into a spontaneous coma if anyone found and read the terrible truth that is my life right now, it needed rescuing.
My plan was to fetch it and get straight back to bed, but while I was there in the library I heard a noise in the courtyard outside. The lights were off so I could pull back the velvet curtain and see a woman with blonde hair and a man’s coat wrapped almost double around her as she ran across the courtyard to where a small, thin man (much smaller than the Professor) was standing with a flashlight in his hand. They crept off together towards the grounds and for some reason I ran downstairs, out the ballroom door at the side and followed them into the night. I could see the light from the torch, but lost my nerve when I saw them disappear around the side of the large hedge. Going back inside and telling myself it was probably Bob and a member of the crew checking things out for tomorrow, I ran as quietly as I could back upstairs and am now in the girls’ bathroom writing this and getting a grip. That’s the problem with an over-active imagination, you turn a bog-standard person with a flashlight into a murderous fiend with fiendishly murderous plans. Drama is so my thing. Say, goodnight, Lemony.
DAY FIFTEEN
But then why were they running? And why so quiet and nervous looking? Ro was up and out before all of us, so I didn’t get to ask her opinion.
The big news of the day so far: first thing this morning I got showered and dressed and bumped into NICK!!! on my way back to the bedroom. He was on his way to wake up the rest of the boys and explained that his dad had dropped him off early. Having flashed my best smile I was so cool with him, said I’d see him later and breezed back into the bedroom only to catch sight of the mirror and the reflection of my smug little head complete with shower cap still on it. Only I could manage to make such a complete fool of myself with the guy I have been in love with for two years even before most people in the land are awake. I am such an over-achiever!
I am hoping against hope that he found it adorable. No, I am hoping against all reason that he found it adorable.
Our cosy ‘family’ breakfasts are a thing of the past. The place was already milling with dozens of people. I felt as if they’d all invaded my house and it isn’t even my house. By the time I wandered outside I realised there were at least a hundred bodies running around looking either busy or lost. I hadn’t expected so many. The courtyard, driveway and one of the lawns were packed tightly with vans, trucks, cars and caravans. Ro says not to call them caravans, to call them trailers or Winnebagoes. There wasn’t much time to talk to her as she was running around and adults were coming up to her to ask her questions about where to put things. But she did tell me that Bob wasn’t there last night.
Because all of us girls and some of the guys are under sixteen, we need a chaperone for legal reasons, someone to keep watch over us on set. I was worried that it would be a school teacher kind of person determined not to let us have any fun. The best news is that Miss Higgins has been given the job of chaperone! She told us last night and said that we could look after ourselves and she’d be there if we needed her. We were also warned that if we caused any trouble then she’d have to start to supervise us more closely. Lizzie is doubling as the assistant chaperone and warned us that if we upset her she’ll get Wendy from wardrobe to put us into hideous outfits and make sure we were at the front of each shot.
I went to report to Lizzie as Miss Higgins had told us to, and she pointed out this sort of catering van where people were lining up to get served breakfast. I wasn’t ready to eat, but felt I should. Then another person (I had no idea who anyone was) showed me a parked double-decker bus and said to eat in there. It had little rectangular café-tables inside and bus-type seats and to my relief Paul bounded on and sat beside me to eat.
I wanted to tell him about the two people acting strangely in the courtyard last night, and maybe chat about how different it was with all these people, but he just sat down with his breakfast and opened with, ‘I’m in love with Ro.’
He just out and said it, no lead up, no hints-and-maybes for a couple of weeks, not even, ‘You know your best friend Ro, yeah?’ or anything like that, just ‘I’m in love with Ro.’ I didn’t know how to take it, it was like my brain melted slowly. My brother feeling that way about my best friend!
So I snapped, ‘Well, she’s too busy today to be in love back, so finish your eggs.’
‘Fair enough,’ he shrugged and kept smiling.
I couldn’t believe it, I was so angry. I know she has no clue about all this as she would have told me. If Paul and Ro end up going out with each other then I will be completely the outsider, I won’t belong anywhere! I wolfed down the rest of my food, stormed off the dining bus and ran straight into Stephen who was wearing a regency soldier’s uniform. We collided so hard that my glasses bumped against his chin and it looked really sore. I just kept saying ‘sorry’ over and over as I walked away.
Then Gussy and Nick were standing right behind him, also wearing infantry uniforms and Nick laughed and said, ‘Oh look, is that your costume, Lemony? I didn’t know there were geeks in those days.’
By then I was wearing just my usual jeans and what I thought was a really nice top. The ridiculous thing is that part of me was thrilled that he used my name even though he was insulting me! Everything in my life had unravelled within five minutes. I felt like I’d lost my brother, my best friend and all hope of Nick, all without even trying.
The one time I really needed to be on my own and there were swarms of people everywhere I looked. I tried to escape into the library, but the door to that and the billiards room have been locked and every other room is full of equipment and people.
Eventually Hanna and Sophie (who is thrilled that Hanna is hanging out with her even though Sophie is three years younger) dragged me off to get changed into our dresses and since then we’ve had five hours of doing nothing, waiting to be called on set. Right now I am back in the bedroom where Lorna and Alice are in their costumes and fast asleep, relying on me to wake them whenever we’re needed.
From up here I can see most of the other teenagers rushing around outside. They all seem so happy hanging out and getting to know new people and I just feel so closed down. I felt really beautiful in this lilac dress yesterday and today it just makes me feel like a fraud, an ugly duckling who everyone will laugh at in her swan’s clothes. I know I’ll look all wrong on set and the director will put me sitting behind a tree or something.
I have to go now as Miss Higgins has just called us to go into hair and make-up.
I’m in a movie and I’m miserable. Life is weird.
LATER
It’s now late at night and I’m on the large staircase writing this so I don’t wake anyone up. The day got much better and I stopped being such a misery to be around. I usually don’t wear make-up and it was incredible how they managed to make me look like a real person. The hairdresser and make-up artist, Dipti, made a huge fuss of my hair and spent ages doing a great ‘up’ hairstyle, set off with the hair-ornament, which she says she’ll teach me so I can start doing it myself. My glasses and huge anorak and oldest sneakers kind of ruined the whole effect, but once on set with no glasses and the right shoes I fancied myself as quite presentable. Alice told
me that she caught Nick staring at me, and Amber said that the older extras in her ‘clump’ on set were commenting on me and thought I was one of the real actors!
The afternoon was pretty tiring, walking around as if we were in a park on a Sunday afternoon. When they yelled ‘Cut!’ we could stop walking and when they yelled, ‘Places please!’ we had to go back to the beginning to get ready to do it all again. My feet have huge blisters, which the set-nurse has put plasters and ointment on. Wendy was horrified and is finding me new shoes for tomorrow.
Gussy was hugely disappointed that they don’t actually say, ‘Lights, camera, action!’ on a film set after all, but ‘Rolling, speed and action’, instead. He feels a little short-changed by the whole experience especially as they wouldn’t let him ‘have a go of the camera’.
At lunchtime everyone stops and all the extras and crew eat on the two dining buses while the actors eat in their trailers. Alex warned us not to go up to the lead actors or ask for photos or autographs, although he’s having fun hanging out with them himself. I bet he introduces Lorna to them as a way of making her like him. Miss Higgins says, ‘People are people’, which I think means that the people you are with are just as important as film stars.
I saw Ro and Paul talking and it all seems like normal so I’m hoping that his love thing is a temporary insanity brought about by the wearing of romantic soldier garb.
DAY SIXTEEN
Today was pretty much identical to yesterday except my feet no longer hurt. Nick looked at me seven-and-a-half times. Paul and Ro are being the same as usual so I’m starting to think that Paul just meant that Ro had done something cool when he said he was in love with her. I mean, anyway, you don’t skip straight to love, there are stages: you have to get the hots for someone, then fancy them, then yearn for them, then realise who they are at a soul level, then and only then can you think about calling it love. You have to put some money into it too, buy things to impress them before calling it love. I’m not even sure if I’m joking here.