Imposter in Zebra-striped Briefs

by C. C. Dado

  “Aurora.” Nathan paused as she kept talking over him. “Aurora, someone is knocking on my door. I’ll have to call you back.”

  Nathan barely got the door all the way open before Josh was walking in. “You have got to let me hide out over here for a while,” he said, breezing by Nathan.

  “I’m not sure I’m even talking to you right now.” Nathan immediately decided against hugging his savior. He crossed his arms and glared at Josh, who was walking over to the couch and making himself comfortable.

  “Why are you mad at me?” Josh looked completely perplexed as he leaned back on the couch and took in Nathan’s angry stance.

  “Because you were sending me all those links, I thought it was you calling me earlier, and I started talking right away about not rimming people, and it was my mom, not you.”

  Josh chuckled, shaking his head. “I’m so glad you moved here.”

  “Well, I’m glad you find this funny. I was horrified. I’m pretty sure she’s going to try and get me placed in a mental facility, but whatever. Who are you hiding from?”

  “My future mother-in-law. I’ve been with her all day,” he said, laying his head back on the couch, looking exhausted.

  “You don’t like Brandon’s mom?”

  “This is the first time I’ve met her. We’ve talked on the phone a few times, but all of ‘her’ does not come across on a phone line, apparently.”

  “You’ve lost me,” Nathan said as he sat down next to Josh.

  “Everything about her is just a lot. Her hair, her clothes…. I swear her dress is made out of an old lady’s couch upholstery, and her accent! Everything is ‘shugah’ and ‘honey,’ and she will not stop hugging me and pinching my cheeks and asking me questions and trying to plan family trips together.”

  “You’re not questioning marrying Brandon because of his mom, are you?”

  “Oh, hell no. Like, I get it. Brandon’s Southern, so it’s not like I was completely shocked, but Brandon’s mom is real Southern. I guess it’s different coming from someone other than Brandon. Brandon was the first person I ever let into my life like that, I fought it the whole way, and his mom comes in and tells me she loves me two minutes after she walks in the door. And I can tell it bothers Brandon that I can’t embrace his mom.”

  “I wish I could help. I’m not really someone people come to for advice. If you haven’t noticed, I have the social skills of a toy poodle that pees on the floor when people pet him.”

  Josh laughed at Nathan’s visual.

  “Have you talked to Brandon about it?” Nathan asked, turning toward Josh.

  “No. I’m just trying to make it to the wedding, and then I won’t have to see her again for at least six months.”

  “I think you should talk to Brandon. It seems like he’s really close with his mom. I would hate for this to come between you two.”

  “Okay, but if it doesn’t go well, you owe me your couch for the night,” he said as he got up and walked out the door.

  Nathan went back to his unpacking and trying to figure out what he was going to wear to dinner that night. He was more than a little curious about Brandon’s mom now. It definitely wasn’t going to be a boring night, that was for sure. His life sure had changed in the few days he had lived here, he thought with a smile. He opened up another box and started sorting his books on the shelf. He hadn’t read anything in a week, which was totally out of character for him. Maybe he would spend today reading. He didn’t have any major plans until Josh and Brandon’s dinner party.

  He was browsing through his selection of historical novels when a knock hit the door a few minutes later. He was suddenly sick to his stomach. Had he given Josh bad advice, and now he’d been kicked out of Brandon’s place? He fretted all the way to the door.

  He wasn’t sure if seeing David standing in his hallway made his stomachache worse or better.

  “Hi.” David stood with his hands in the front pockets of his loose running pants.

  “Hi.” Nathan stepped back, out of the way of the entrance, holding a book close to his chest like a protective shield. Nathan was positive he had never seen a better-looking man in his life. The fact that he was here to see Nathan blew him away.

  David grabbed the door and closed it while stepping in front of Nathan, leaving him pinned to the wall. It was like déjà vu, yet so different because this was David.

  “I’m sorry for falling asleep on you the other night.” David looked like he was going kiss him. Nathan wanted it so bad, but he was not going to be the one to make the first move this time.

  “Apology accepted.” Nathan’s voice came out softer than he had intended.

  “Sorry, I’m saying this wrong.” He ran his fingers through his sandy-blond hair, suddenly changing from sweet to frustrated. Nathan swore David took another step closer, if that was possible. Their chests were almost touching. “I’m still kind of freaking out, to be honest.”

  “I’m sorry.” Nathan hunkered down into himself, not really sure what he was apologizing for. His mind was suddenly flooded with memories of the bullies in high school.

  “Hey.” David cupped the side of Nathan’s face, making Nathan look up at him.

  “I’m not trying to scare you. I still can’t stop thinking it would be so much easier if I could walk away completely and pretend I had never met you. It’s not like we would probably ever run into each other.”

  “Um, yeah. We can do that,” Nathan agreed, not wanting to show how much that thought hurt. He looked at the floor again, dejected.

  “But that’s the problem. I can’t,” David said, dropping his hand in defeat. “I can’t stop thinking about you. Everything about you intrigues me. The way you look at me makes me feel….” David paused, at a loss for words. “Fuck. I can’t even explain it. I’ve never wanted to give a guy a romantic compliment before, so I’m not sure if I’m doing this right, but you’re beautiful,” he said softly, placing a hand on the side of Nathan’s neck, caressing Nathan’s collarbone with his thumb, causing Nathan’s breath to deepen in his chest, suddenly making him feel a bit dizzy. David trailed his thumb up Nathan’s neck and raised his chin, making Nathan meet his gaze again. “Remembering how good your skin felt, how soft your lips were. Thinking how great it felt to wake up lying with you. I’m driving myself crazy.”

  Nathan didn’t know what to say to that.

  “I don’t understand any of this, but I need to see if it was a fluke, or the liquor, or if it really was that amazing.”

  David leaned in and tentatively grazed his lips across Nathan’s. Nathan let the book he was holding fall to the floor, and clutched David’s hips as David caressed his bottom lip with his tongue to get him to open up.

  After a few minutes, David let up. He stared at Nathan for so long Nathan started to fidget, unable to meet his eyes any longer.

  “It wasn’t the alcohol,” David said. “I’m probably going to freak out again before I figure this out.” David stopped talking and kissed him again, this time slower, tasting him.

  “Um, that’s okay.” Nathan ran his fingers over his lips, not sure what else to say as David stepped back.

  “Do you have plans tonight?” David asked reaching up, and brushing Nathan’s dark, wavy hair out of his face.

  “No,” Nathan said, still trying to gather his thoughts after that unexpected yet breathtaking kiss. “Oh, wait.” Nathan rubbed his forehead, instantly trying to think of a way to get out of the rehearsal dinner, but knowing he couldn’t skip out on something that important. “I have Brandon and Joshua’s rehearsal dinner tonight.”

  “Oh, okay,” David said, shoving his hands back into the pockets of his track pants. “Maybe I can see you another night?”

  “No.”

  “Oh, okay,” David said, looking confused and rejected.

  “I meant no, it doesn’t have to be another night. Why don’t you come as my date? They told me to bring one. And you have kind of already met.” Nathan watched for David’s reacti
on optimistically as he partially held his breath.

  “Date?” David looked unsure and maybe a little queasy about Nathan’s use of the word “date,” which was a little confusing to Nathan after what they had just done.

  “Sure, that sounds good. What time do we need to be there?” David finally said.

  “Not for a couple hours. We could watch a movie or something.”

  “I promise not to fall asleep on you this time,” David said, squeezing Nathan’s hip and guiding him to the living room.

  Chapter 13

  The rehearsal dinner (Nathan)

  “ARE YOU sure what I’m wearing is okay?” David motioned to his Nike track pants.

  “I think you look amazing.” Nathan said, blushing at his admission and grabbing a bottle of wine off the table. “They said it was casual.”

  They made their way across the hall. Standing at the door, David grabbed the bottle of wine out of Nathan’s hand.

  “Here, let me take that.”

  Nathan glanced at David questioningly.

  “Sorry,” David mumbled under his breath as he tried handing the bottle back to Nathan without making eye contact. “God, I really am bad at this. I have no idea how this works. I just want to do things for you.”

  Nathan tilted his head to the side as he contemplated what David was talking about. It took Nathan a second to figure out why he thought it would bother him, then figured some guys would probably find it emasculating to have someone act like they couldn’t even carry a bottle of wine. But Nathan thought it was sweet. It made him purr inside to have someone bigger and in control. It made him feel cared for, like he could relax and just be himself. Nathan was blown away that this perfect specimen of man was apologizing for doing something nice for him.

  “It’s fine. Thank you,” Nathan said, and knocked on the door.

  “Hey, glad you could make it,” Josh said as he opened the door.

  Josh had on a nice pair of dark jeans with a studded belt, and a black shirt, and his feet were bare. Nathan couldn’t help but notice what a nice pair of feet he had. He froze momentarily, remembering the foot fetish video Josh had sent him. He was definitely into feet. Not in a fetishy way, though. He didn’t want to do dirty things to them. He just thought they were an attractive part of a man, and Josh’s were nice. He wondered what David’s feet looked like. Maybe he did have a creepy foot fetish.

  “Hey, my eyes are up here, tiger,” Josh said jokingly, pointing to his eyes, and Nathan reddened at Josh’s teasing.

  David grabbed Nathan’s hand and moved closer to his side. Nathan wasn’t sure what was going on, but it seemed like David puffed up a little, handing Josh the bottle of wine. This was so weird. It reminded him of the paper he’d written on the mating habits of wolves in the third grade, where they would pee in a circle around their mate to ward off other suitors. That couldn’t be what was going on, could it? Was David metaphorically peeing on him? As usual Nathan wished he were better at reading people.

  The apartment was already alive with energy. Light music was playing in the background. An older lady with big, puffy blonde hair, who Nathan assumed was Brandon’s mom, was in the kitchen cooking with Brandon, and a variety of folks he had met at the bachelor party were mingling in the living room and at the kitchen bar.

  Josh smiled at them both. “You guys want a glass of wine or a soda or something?”

  “Uh, sure. Wine sounds good,” Nathan said, thinking wine had to taste better than beer.

  “I’m fine, thanks,” David said, still sounding marginally irritated, which made Josh chuckle for some reason.

  “Well, I think you know everyone here except Brandon’s mom.” Josh led them over to the kitchen bar and they took a seat. “Dotty, this is our neighbor Nathan and his date, David.”

  David pulled his hand away like he was embarrassed at being called out as Nathan’s date. Nathan’s earlier excitement about being peed on withered.

  “Well, hello, shugahs. It sure is nice to get to meet all of my baby’s friends.” Dotty leaned into Brandon, who was cutting tomatoes, and gave him a kiss on the head.

  “Is there anything we can do to help?” Nathan asked Dotty.

  “Please, you are our guest, honey. You just relax and have a good time,” she said. Brandon winked at Nathan from behind her in an “I told you so” way.

  “Momma, you’re using olive oil, not butter on this, right?” Brandon asked, stirring the pasta.

  “Of course, honey.” She rolled her eyes at Nathan and David, making them both laugh and making Brandon scowl at her.

  “Momma! Come on. You know butter is bad for you.”

  “Oh, says who? The folks selling you their fancy oil?”

  “No, Momma. The American Heart Association.”

  “Is he giving you a hard time, Dotty?” Josh asked, walking in and putting his arms around Brandon from behind.

  Nathan felt a moment of envy, seeing the look of happiness on Dotty’s face as Josh kissed Brandon on his cheek.

  “Y’all are just the cutest couple. I’m so glad my boy met you, Joshua. And don’t you worry. He just frets over his momma.”

  Nathan was glad to see Josh was getting along better with his mother-in-law.

  “All right, dinner is ready.” Brandon handed a large bowl of pasta to Josh to set on the table. “Let’s eat before it gets cold.”

  Nathan and David moved to the table with the other guests. The food looked so good. It was a Southern feast for sure. A large serving plate filled with the best-looking fried chicken Nathan had ever seen sat in the middle of the table, surrounded by different salads, pastas, corn on the cob, and bread.

  Nathan’s stomach suddenly growled. Thankfully no one noticed because Brandon clinked his glass with his fork.

  “I would like to make a toast.” Brandon sounded like he was getting a little choked up. “I never really thought I would actually be here with my family and friends, about to get married to the most amazing person I have ever met. I hoped, but never in a million years did I think I would find someone I love as much as this man.” He grabbed Josh’s hand. “Thank you all so much for being a part of this with us. I wish each and every one of you the happiness I have found.” The sound of glasses clinking echoed through the room, along with the approvals of everyone around the table. “Hear, hear.”

  “Cheers.”

  Nathan warmed, feeling David’s hand touch his leg under the table. It wasn’t in a sexual way. It was more of a curious touch, like he was unsure what Nathan’s reaction would be. It had his insides purring once again.

  As everyone ate they discussed Saturday’s wedding plans. When dinner started winding down, Brandon served an amazing apple crumble with vanilla ice cream. And everyone sat around talking.

  “I’m glad my boys have friends like all of you around if I can’t be,” Dotty said, sniffling into her napkin.

  “Ah, Momma.” Brandon got up and gave his mom a hug from behind her chair and kissed her on the cheek. “My wedding is going to mean so much more to me, having you here.”

  “Thank you, shugah. Your daddy would be so proud of you.” Sympathetic looks showed around the table at the emotion that haunted Brandon’s face. “Now we should let you two get some sleep. You have a big weekend ahead of you,” his mom said, getting up from the table and starting to grab plates.

  “Yeah, thank you for dinner,” David said, pushing his chair back and helping clear the table.

  When everything was cleared and washed so there was no mess left for the happy couple, David grabbed Nathan’s hand.

  “I really have to get going.”

  “I’ll walk you out.”

  “How about I walk you to your door?” David asked.

  Nathan couldn’t even respond. His mind was frantically working, wondering if he should ask David in.

  “Thanks for sticking around and helping clean, guys,” Josh said as he walked them to the door.

  “See you tomorrow,” Nathan said as Josh cl
osed the door behind them.

  They made the five steps across the hall in seconds. Nathan turned around at the door, facing David.

  “Do you really have to go?” he asked, sounding marginally desperate and insecure.

  “I guess I could come in for a minute, maybe tuck you in,” David said, leaning in and softly kissing Nathan’s lips.

  It took an hour until David felt Nathan was sufficiently tucked in.

  Chapter 14

  In the closet (Nathan)

  FRIDAY MORNING Nathan sat at his desk trying to focus on the research he needed to do in preparation for their next round of tests. He couldn’t stop wondering if it would be weird for him to leave work early and surprise David at his woodshop. David had stopped by unannounced yesterday, so maybe it was okay. Maybe he would just “happen” to be in the neighborhood. Yeah, that wasn’t a bad idea.

  Nathan grabbed his coat and caught the twelve o’clock bus to Freemont before he could talk himself out of it. He might need to eventually get a car, but for now he was adjusting pretty well to public transportation. Better than he thought he would, anyway. He was getting pretty good at not letting his anxiety stop him from doing things lately.

  The bus let him off a few blocks up from David’s shop. He got nervous the closer he was to the building. What if David got mad he was there? Maybe they weren’t even open. Maybe Nathan had assumed too much again. Or maybe David would walk up and kiss him like he did last night. The possibility of that happening was too enticing for Nathan to turn around and go back.

  Nathan finally saw the big sign out in front of David’s shop. It hung above the front door: Handmade Home. Under that was a list of the store’s items, then handmade furniture using reclaimed wood, followed by woodworking classes available.

  He was impressed David offered classes.

  As he approached the building, he saw it used to be a garage of some kind, but the roller-door panels had been swapped out for glass, and one door was rolled up. A showroom of all kinds of amazing handmade furniture took up the right side of the store, while the left side was obviously where the classes and woodworking took place.