She had set a boundary a few nights before. A promise to herself to allow for physical closeness at night, but when the morning came to separate herself. Now that boundary was being crossed and she felt dangerously close to simply allowing it to happen.
With a sigh, she pressed her hands against Dominic’s chest and pushed. He grunted his surprise, but rolled off. Scrambling to her feet, she took a few steps away and some short breaths to calm her pounding heart.
He pursed his lips as he rose to his full height. “Still angry with me about earlier?”
She arched an eyebrow at his sharp voice. “No, of course not. You made yourself clear, and so did I. We’re at an impasse.”
She hoped her voice wasn’t trembling as much as her hands.
“I suppose we are.” His face softened. “But I shouldn’t have…snapped at you.”
He shifted. This was a man unused to apologizing, that was clear. Yet he was offering her one.
“Why did you?” she asked, venturing a step closer. “Despite what you claim, it’s evident something in this place is important to you. Why don’t you want anything to do with the estate’s upkeep?”
He clenched his jaw and averted his gaze as if ashamed. “This house wasn’t given freely. I wanted to win, I didn’t care about the prize.”
“Whom did you win it from?” she asked.
“My brother.” His eyes lifted to hers again, but this time in challenge.
She sucked in her breath between her teeth. Once again, she had stumbled into the middle of a feud between the two brothers. “I didn’t realize this place came from your family. I thought it was a recent addition to your holdings.”
He shifted uncomfortably as he brushed wet snow from his coat. “It is, but Cole didn’t want to give anything to me, whether he had a rightful claim to it or not.”
Her eyes narrowed. The jovial, teasing light in Dominic’s eyes had gone out the instant Colden came into the discussion. His resentment for his older brother was evident from everything physical in him. From the way he stood, to the fire in his stare, it was clear he truly despised Cole.
Katherine still liked Cole, had once liked him enough to marry him, though she couldn’t picture that future anymore. Dominic had seared those dreams away with his hot touch. But she couldn’t understand why Dominic would hold such animosity toward him. Beyond that, it made his reasons for marrying her all the more confusing.
“You really hate him.” She tipped her head to examine her husband’s hard face. “And you feel very little for the rest of your family.”
He flinched and for a brief moment she saw a flash of raw hurt streak across his gaze before he masked it. “I care a great deal for Julia. And I wouldn’t want to see my mother come to any harm.”
“But that still doesn’t explain…” she trailed off, not sure if she dared go further. Already Dominic looked angry. Aside from that, digging into his history wasn’t a good idea. It was counter to her promise to remain distant.
“Explain what?” he snapped as he turned away with clenched fists. He held himself stiff. If she touched him, she feared he would shatter.
“It doesn’t signify,” she said with a dismissive wave of her hand. She was too close already.
Spinning back on his heel, he narrowed his gaze. “But it obviously does. You have something to ask, some point to make. Please, do make it. I’m on tenterhooks.”
His anger should have served as the warning he obviously meant it to be, but instead of fearing him or disliking him for this sudden shift, she felt something far different.
Empathy.
Because inside the fury that boiled in his eyes and darkened his skin, there was a twinge of something else. The kind of loneliness she herself often felt throughout the years after the loss of her parents.
“Very well,” she said softly. “I only wanted to ask why you married me? At the time, you claimed it was to save your family from shame, but it’s very clear you aren’t the kind of man who would protect the family who rejected you. So why did you carry through with our nuptials?” She took an involuntary step in his direction and just barely resisted the urge to take his rigid arm. “Why did you save them? Save me?”
His eyes widened as if that was the last thing he expected her to say. “I—I…” He struggled for words for a moment. “Everyone has problems when it comes to their family. My God, don’t you?”
A wave of nausea hit Katherine square in the stomach before it spread through her body. Her family. In her attempt to decipher what kind of man Dominic was, she’d once again forgotten just why she couldn’t allow herself too close to him.
Pulling her damp coat closer around her neck, she turned away. “My parents died when I was very young. I have no ‘problems,’ as you put it. Now, I’m getting cold. I’ll go in.”
But before she could escape, Dominic caught her arm in a gentle, but binding grip. He turned her slowly and stared down at her with eyes that no longer expressed anger, but a softer emotion.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped,” he said softly. “I don’t want to argue.”
“What do you want?” she asked, though with every word she cursed herself. She was opening the door to far too many options that she shouldn’t pursue.
His eyes darkened, but he mercifully ignored all the seductive doors she opened with her question.
“A few days ago, I told you I invited my friend, Baron Malleville, to stay with us for a while. He sent word he’ll be arriving week’s end to meet my new bride and see the estate. We won’t have much time alone together for the fortnight he’ll be our guest.”
Katherine should have felt relief at that statement, instead she felt a curious disappointment.
“I’ll make sure a guest chamber is ready for his arrival,” she said as she extracted herself from Dominic’s distracting grip. It was hard to think when he touched her.
With a shake of his head, he said, “I appreciate that, but I merely wanted to ask you if we could take some time before his arrival. I have been told the lake on the property is perfect for ice skating. And if we don’t do it now, we may be too late when it begins to thaw. Will you come out with me tomorrow?”
She shut her eyes with a shivering sigh. This was her chance to push him away. To tell him she had no interest in spending any extra time in his presence.
To lie.
“I—I don’t have skates,” was all she could think to say.
He smiled. “Matthews tells me there are several pairs about the estate.”
She held back a groan. “I’ve never skated.”
His smile broadened. “I’ll help you.”
“Very well.” She was out of excuses, and out of energy to fight something she found herself desperately wanting. “Tomorrow afternoon.”
The hard angles of his face softened with the excitement of a child on Christmas morning, and her heart softened with it.
“Then allow me to escort you back to the house where you can warm yourself and I can return to my…my duties.”
She hesitated as she looked at the strong arm he extended to her. Touching him was always a gamble. Would her knees go weak or not?
And when she did and her legs turned to warm jam, she let out a sigh. Every moment with Dominic was such a risk.
She was courting disaster, but perhaps having a visitor would help. In fact, perhaps she needed to arrange for more than one visitor. She sighed as they entered the foyer and a rush of warm air made her skin tingle.
Yes, she could bring another person into this strange, confusing situation. Someone who would distract Dominic, and perhaps help her figure out what she wanted, and what she could afford to take.
Chapter 9
D ominic Mallory was a large man. Not just in size, where he towered above Katherine by more than a head, but in his presence. Any room he entered belonged to him. Katherine had no doubt this was the way in London, too. People noticed him, they were drawn to him…even feared him.
Bu
t at the moment, sitting on the floor amongst a pile of mismatched boxes, he looked more like a lost little boy to Katherine than a man who inspired terror in his enemies. He wasn’t moving, simply stared at a stack of papers.
When he told her about leaving his family in the carriage the day of their wedding, he pretended that he didn’t care about the loss. But being alone at such a young age couldn’t have been easy, even for someone as strong as Dominic. Was this how he’d looked so many years ago? A frightened schoolboy with no family to reach out to, no place to call home? She winced at the image of her husband so isolated.
Even if he cut himself off from the Mallorys in anger, that separation from his family and the only life he ever knew must have changed him irrevocably.
She hazarded a step closer as familiar empathy brought unshed tears to her eyes and a twinge of pain to her heart. “Did you forget about me?”
He started at the sound of her voice and clambered to his feet, just barely avoiding a collision with a hanging mobile in the process. He pushed the dangling toy aside with a scowl.
“What are you doing up here?” he snapped. His vulnerability flew, replaced by the harder edge he presented to the world.
“We were to go ice skating today, were we not?” she asked.
Why was she pressing? Skating with her husband was a terrible idea for so many reasons. Time alone with him would only test her resolve and make her want things she would never have. She’d spent most of the morning finding ways to avoid it, but here she was, bringing it up. Forcing both their hands.
He seemed surprised. “I’m sorry, I lost track of time.” Holding out his arm, he motioned to the stairway with his head. “Come, we’ll go now.”
She sidestepped his touch to look around the room. The attic was cluttered with years, maybe centuries, of collecting. There were artifacts from so many generations that the place was a hodgepodge of old clothing, books, and letters.
“How many generations of Mallorys lived here?” she asked with a small smile as she fingered the worn edging of a moth-bitten gown on a dressmaker’s mannequin.
He watched her for a long moment, long enough that she felt his stare through her clothes and skin to her very soul. But she refused to turn back and face those eyes and the heat that burned within.
“None,” he said in a low, unreadable voice. When she dared a peek at him, his face was just as stoic. “This home was in my mother’s family, not my father’s.”
“And what was her last name before marriage?”
“Emson.”
“How many generations of Emsons lived here?” she corrected herself with the smallest of smiles.
“I’m not sure. Five or six. It was a secondary home, not a main dwelling.” He tilted his head and she thought his lips twitched with a brief grin.
“And what deep, dark secret are you searching for in your family tree?” she teased with a laugh.
Any flash of humor was gone as quickly as it came, replaced by his scowl. Then he turned away to shut her out completely, leaving her chilled by his sudden change of attitude.
“We should go skate now if we’re going to go at all. The weather will turn in a few hours and Adrian is to arrive tomorrow.”
With that, he stalked down the stairs, leaving her staring at his back in shock. But as she followed him, she knew she had uncovered something important.
Dominic’s business at this house was personal, and he didn’t want her to know a thing about it.
Why hadn’t he come up with some vapid, pithy response to Katherine’s questions about his family secrets?
Dominic glanced up from the skate he was lacing around Katherine’s boot and explored her face. She’d been very quiet since they left the attic. Not angry, but contemplative.
He had a sneaking suspicion her distraction had everything to do with his near admission that he did have secrets to keep—ones about his past, ones about their marriage…ones that would horrify her if she ever uncovered them.
“What are you looking at so intently?” she asked, her voice a mere whisper on the brisk wind.
He started and returned his attention to the skate laces. “It’s been a while since I tied these,” he lied. “I need to make sure they’re tight so you don’t slip and fall.”
When he glanced back up to see if she believed his excuse, her eyes were focused on him. Soft, as if pained. He broke away from that seeing stare and rose to his feet to offer her a hand.
“Ready?” he asked with false brightness.
She frowned. “I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready.”
But she stood nonetheless and caught the arm he offered. He hated to admit it, even to himself, but he felt her touch all the way to his core. Even to the dark places he’d forgotten existed over the many years he spent alone. Places he’d sworn weren’t possible to reach.
“Just put one foot in front of the other,” he advised as she stepped shakily onto the ice.
Nodding, she stared at her feet as she glided with jerky movements toward the middle of the lake. “Oh, this isn’t so ba-ad!” she squealed as she slipped sideways.
The only thing that kept her from going down in a heap was his support, and she nearly took him down with her.
“Just take your time,” he said as she clawed her way back up his arm to a standing position. “It takes a while to get used to the feeling.”
She darted a disbelieving glance at him, but he was happy to see her eyes twinkled. His tormented, tangled emotions eased as he let himself enjoy the shared experience.
“That’s easy for you to say. You already know how to do th-i-is!”
Again, she flopped to her right as her skate slid too far out from her body. When she managed to pull herself back to her feet, she was laughing.
“I didn’t know I stretched that way,” she giggled.
“Neither did I,” he said, leaning a fraction closer to her ear and taking a subtle whiff of her floral-scented skin. “Perhaps we can utilize this talent later.”
Her laughter increased, even as her cheeks darkened to the most appealing shade of pink he’d ever seen. “If I didn’t think I’d fall right on my…my posterior, I’d slap you for that cheeky remark, Dominic Mallory.”
He shrugged as he guided her in a long circle around the perimeter of the lake. “I’m only trying to put your mind on things other than skating. If you aren’t concentrating so hard, you’ll learn faster.”
She arched an eyebrow as she clutched his arm to keep her balance. “Trust me, Dominic. The kind of discussion you were offering would not increase my balance. What else can I think about?”
He grinned. Two could play at the question-and-answer game. “Tell me more about yourself, then.”
Her face went from pink to white in just a few seconds. “I-I’m not particularly interesting.”
“Of course you are. What about your parents? Aside from the fact they were taken from you far too early, I know very little about them,” he said as his own laughter faded.
Why had she suddenly changed from the wildflower who subtly teased about their lovemaking to a skittish rabbit who barely met his eyes?
She released his arm and pushed off, but as quickly as she did so, she went down on the ice on her rear end with enough force that she winced. “I think I’ve had enough skating for the afternoon.”
He watched her attempt to slide to her feet for a moment before he reached down to help her up. As he pulled her against his chest, he whispered, “Why are you so afraid?”
She blanched further, but was smart enough not to deposit herself back on the ice by pushing him away. “I-I’m not afraid. It’s not a terribly interesting story and—”
“You’re lying.” He shook his head as he tried to meet her eyes. She ducked from his gaze. “What are you hiding from?”
She took a few short breaths while she stared down at her feet. Finally, her gaze came back up, dark and painfully green. “It is an upsetting subject. And it’s personal.”
&
nbsp; No one understood that better than he did. Talking about family hurts was dangerous, but he found himself wanting to hear her story. And maybe even tell her some of his. Perhaps they could find solace together.
He jerked back at that notion. What was he thinking? He hardly knew this woman. Getting close to her was a ridiculous idea. He’d learned long ago how trust and emotion only made a man weak.
He let her go. She managed to stay on her feet by righting her balance with her arms outstretched.
“I think you’re ready to go it alone for a few turns,” he said, skating a few feet away.
Her eyes widened as she watched him go. “But I—I thought you were going to help me.”
He shook his head, pushing away the twinge of guilt he felt from seeing the hurt on her face. “No, Katherine. I think you can take care of yourself.”
Katherine stared at him for a long moment with a strangely emotionless expression. Then she nodded as if she understood completely and skated off on wobbly ankles toward the edge of the lake.
Away from him.
As much as that should have pleased him, it did not.
Katherine ran her hands over an old silk flower arrangement one more time, hoping to make it more presentable. It didn’t help much. She was torn between worry that her houseguest wouldn’t like Dominic’s home and annoyance that her husband hadn’t given her what she needed to make Lansing Square fit to be seen. If Baron Adrian Malleville thought the place wretched, it was Dominic’s own fault.
She turned from the flowers with a sharp sigh. Why did her husband’s lack of interest in his estate bother her so much? It wasn’t as if she planned a life with him when they wed. Quite the contrary. Since the moment she agreed to Dominic and Cole’s marriage switch, she had been trying to find ways to steer her husband’s interest away from her. And being cooped up in an isolated estate certainly didn’t do that.
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