“The son of a bastard,” Cole said, finally stepping forward. “Holding my father’s title. I could not allow it. I thought of spreading the story of your true parentage, but I realized that would only put a blight on the Mallory name. I realized I would have to find a way to produce a legitimate child.”
Sarah glared at him. “He told me he wanted me to go away. That he wouldn’t divorce me in order to prevent another scandal, but if I disappeared for long enough, he would have me declared dead and marry again. Of course, I resisted. London is my home. All good society is here. Why would I leave just to satisfy his desire to keep his precious bloodline pure? But then he offered me money. He offered me freedom on the Continent. Freedom I would never be allowed here.”
Julia uncovered her mouth. “Freedom?”
“To do whatever I desired,” Sarah laughed. “You wouldn’t understand, little spinster, what pleasures a woman desires. Cole promised me a fortune to hide away. By that time, we had very little love between us, so I agreed. The fact that the ship I was intended to travel on actually sank and I was immediately believed dead, rather than the years it would have taken by our plan, was a lucky coincidence. I wrote Cole upon my arrival and told him I expected my payments to arrive on time.”
Dominic shook his head. Their deception went even deeper than he imagined. “If you had this devil’s agreement, why did you ever come back?”
Her face twisted. “After a while, his ‘on time’ payments grew later and later. Eventually, they got smaller and smaller, too. I hired an investigator to see why and realized the damn fool was squandering away his fortune. And then I discovered his plan to marry you.”
Katherine shook her head, but didn’t turn away from Sarah’s pointed glare. “My God.”
“Why should he be allowed to marry again if he didn’t hold up his bargain? When he ignored my demand for my latest payment, I boarded a ship and headed back to London. I made sure he knew about it when it was far too late to stop me.” She smiled over her shoulder at her husband. “He never should have crossed me, and I will never make the mistake of entering such a bargain with him again. As Dominic just learned, Cole is loath to keep up his end of any agreement.”
Cole glared miserably, but remained silent. Dominic shook his head.
“You did all this just to keep me from a title I never desired? From the children I never intended to have?” he asked. “You are pathetic. You told so many lies and caused so much pain. Well, I denounce any claim I have on your father’s title, and I will do whatever is necessary to make that claim legal.”
Cole’s eyes lit up, but before he could say anything, Katherine whispered, “Cole isn’t the only one who caused pain.”
Dominic turned to her. His heart ached at the way she stared at him with such emptiness. He hadn’t realized how alive her stare had been before. How attached he’d become to the glitter of desire and emotion in her eyes when she looked at him. That was gone now. Lost because of his betrayals.
“I know that,” he began.
She waved him off. “I don’t care. I don’t want any more explanations. I’ve had enough.” She turned to Cole and Sarah. “You are no longer welcome in my home. Please leave.”
Cole drew back. “But—”
“Go!” she repeated a little louder. “Now.”
He nodded as he took Sarah’s arm and led her away. Once they were gone, Katherine turned to the rest of them. “As for all of you, I have no words. Perhaps later I’ll be able to find a few, but for now I’m going to my chamber. I do not wish to be disturbed. Good afternoon.”
Turning on her heel, Katherine swept out of the room. Dominic watched her go helplessly. How he longed to run after her, to gather her into his arms and beg her forgiveness. He took a step toward her, but Adrian placed a hand on his arm.
“Not yet,” he advised quietly. “Let her have a little time before you go to her.”
“I don’t think time is going to help,” Dominic said as he covered his eyes. “I’ve lost my wife.”
As he stared at the door, he realized if he lost his wife…he would lose everything.
Chapter 15
K atherine stared out her window. She was happy for the winter scene below. Its barren starkness was a perfect compliment to her empty heart. She didn’t think she could bear it if there were singing birds or budding flowers to accompany her loss.
Lies. So many lies. They were layered one on top of the other, tangled like a web, until she could no longer discern the truth anymore.
She’d taken refuge in her chamber for over two hours, but she still hurt so much that it was unclear what pained her most. The people she trusted had used her.
Cole pretended to be her friend, pretended to care for her when in reality he had only played at being everything she thought she wanted. That her guardians had played a part in his cruel deception only stung all the more. She never believed Eustacia and Stephan loved her, but she had been comfortable in the knowledge that they had her best interest at heart.
It seemed she could not judge anyone’s character.
Certainly, if someone had come to her six months before and told her Cole arranged for his wife to disappear and pretend to be dead so he could illegally marry someone else and have a child with her, she would have laughed. It was preposterous. She would have said how truly grief stricken her fiancé was. She would have told them Cole wasn’t capable of thinking such a thing, let alone putting the plan in action.
How could she have been so wrong?
But there was one hurt that stabbed at her worst of all. More than her guardians’ falsehoods. More than Cole’s deceptions and frauds. More than Julia’s silent acquiescence to the plot between her brothers.
Dominic.
She winced when she thought of him. Shutting her eyes, she pictured his face. Over and over again, she thought of the acceptance in his expression when she heard he only took her as a wife in trade. He had expected the truth to come out at some point. Perhaps he was even relieved. Now he no longer had to pretend their marriage meant something.
She covered her eyes.
“Why?” she whispered. “Why couldn’t I keep you from my heart?”
She heard the door in the adjoining chamber open and straightened to attention. From the heavy footfalls in the other room, she knew it was Dominic in the chamber they once shared. He strode to her door and hesitated on the other side. Her breath caught and she realized she was actually praying he would enter.
Even after all he’d done, she still had no self-control.
Hardening herself, she folded her arms and called out, “Come in if that’s what you wish to do.”
The door opened and Dominic stepped inside. Her heart thudded treacherously at the sight of him. Framed by the dying light of her fire, his face was dark and haggard. It was clear regret weighed heavily on his shoulders.
But was it regret over deceiving her, or being caught in his lies?
Did it even matter?
“Kat?” he said, his voice unsure and shaky from the distance he so wisely maintained.
The nickname he’d chosen for her warmed her even as she fought those foolishly tender feelings. She forced her anger and betrayal to the surface over her grief and disappointment. She wanted Dominic to see the damage he’d caused, not how easily he could sway her with a few tender words or a gentle touch.
She’d already given him far too much power as it was.
“Don’t call me Kat.” She broke his gaze. It was too hard to look at him. “Don’t ever call me Kat again. The last thing I want are reminders of how you misled me into caring for you.”
Dominic’s eyes went wide and he gripped the back of the closest chair. Katherine started as she realized what she’d just said. She had admitted she’d come to care for her husband.
Well, she didn’t anymore. His lies killed those feelings.
But she still couldn’t manage to look him in the face.
“Please, let me talk to you,” h
e said softly.
It was a tone she’d never heard from him before. Patient. Gentle. Her mind was jumbled with thoughts. Was this still part of some trick?
“I don’t want to hear your explanations,” she said with a tired sigh as she turned to the darkening sky outside. “I can’t listen to any more lies.”
“No more lies,” he promised.
The anger she’d been looking for to protect herself bubbled up without her having to search for it. “How am I to believe you, Dominic? How can I believe anything you say?”
He dipped his head. “I don’t know. But I swear to you, I’ll tell you everything you want to know now, like I should have done weeks ago.”
She stood up and paced to the fire. Folding her arms as a shield across her heart, she turned back to him. “I don’t want to talk.”
His spine stiffened. “That’s unfortunate, because I’m not leaving this room until we’ve resolved this.”
Humorless laughter bubbled out of her. “You think there is resolution possible? You lied to me, you deceived me, you made me into the greatest fool. Nothing you say can change that.”
“You’re right.” He frowned. “I did all those things. I hurt you, I know that. But what I said to you in front of Cole and Sarah, it was only the surface. I didn’t want you to hear what I did from my brother, of all people. I wanted to tell you myself. But there is more, Katherine. More to it than just lies or a bargain.”
Her hands trembled as his words and his pleading tone touched her. Dominic had always been strong, mysterious. Now he looked at her with nothing hidden. His emotions shone in his eyes, and it was clear he needed her. Needed to confess.
And she needed to hear him. Despite her anger.
“What more is there to say?” she whispered.
“I want you to understand why I struck that agreement with Cole.” He winced. “It was stupid and cruel, but I was…Katherine, I was desperate and I’m not a desperate man.”
She took an involuntary step closer. “Why?”
“I spent my life knowing I was different. Feeling Harrison Mallory’s disdain for me and my mother’s coldness, but never understanding why. Then one night, Cole revealed the truth.”
He hesitated and she heard him fighting to measure his breathing. Her heart went out to him. No matter what he’d done to change his fortunes, no matter how he struggled to become the strong man he was, remembering the pains of his childhood wasn’t easy. He fought emotion with every part of himself, from the stiff way he held his body to the flat tone of his voice.
“I was only thirteen, Cole was eighteen. We argued frequently, but this time was different. He told me I was nothing but a bastard. I told him I didn’t believe him, but it struck me as so true.”
“Did you ask your father or your mother?” she asked, even as she cursed herself for wanting to know more. It would have been wiser just to push him out, but she needed his explanation. Needed him to tell her why he made her no more than a pawn.
He shook his head. “I wanted to, but I was young. When Harrison Mallory was angry, his reprisals were swift and unpleasant, I was too afraid to court them. For two years, I watched every movement around me, listened to each word spoken, hoping to catch someone in a lie, or learn some secret. Finally, plied by a little drink I snitched from the cellar, I got up the nerve to confront the man I’d called father for fifteen years.” He shook his head as if to erase the memories.
He cleared his throat. “I asked him flat out if I was really a Mallory. He only stared at me for a long time, but then he admitted the truth. He told me I was the result of an affair my mother had. And that he couldn’t stand the sight of me.”
Katherine turned her face away as pain exploded in her chest. Pain for the boy her husband had been. No matter what he’d done to her, she didn’t believe he deserved such little regard from the man who raised him. She couldn’t believe someone could be so cold to a child who had no responsibility for how he had come to be in the world.
“What did Larissa say?” she asked in a choked voice.
Her mother-in-law had never been a warm person, but she hadn’t been flatly unkind, either. She was distant and unemotional, but Katherine could hardly believe she would stand idly by while her husband and son abused Dominic.
He laughed humorlessly. “Throughout my life, my mother could hardly look at me. Perhaps I was a reminder of a mistake, I don’t know. But when I asked her for the truth about my parentage, she pretended as if the question was never voiced. Denials became the only words we shared. Only once did I manage to get her to say anything about my real father. One night after she drank too much, she admitted she had loved the man. And implied that her arranged marriage to Mallory had kept her from him, whomever he was.”
Katherine shook her head in disbelief. “But she never told you his name?”
“No, nor anything about his circumstances.” It was a matter of fact answer. “I couldn’t live there any longer with a ‘father’ who hated me and a mother who denied me my past. When I returned to school, I threw myself into my work and into my anger. I never came ‘home’ again. Not even when Harrison Mallory did the world a favor and died. Eventually, I realized I couldn’t live my life trying to prove the man wrong about me. I had to shrug off his hold. But I couldn’t forget I had a real father in the world somewhere. I wanted…and still want to know who he is.”
She nodded. That, at least, she understood. “So you began inquiring?”
He looked into the fire, his eyes distant with memories. “I had resources of my own by that time and I put them into finding out the truth. That was when I discovered my mother had spent a great deal of time alone in this house around the time I was conceived.” He sighed. “So I put my energy into gaining access. But Mother wouldn’t hear of it, and Cole kept me out just for spite until…”
He trailed off with a shake of his head.
The blood drained from Katherine’s face. Here was where the story involved her.
“He was desperate to rid himself of me and cover his fraud.” She swallowed hard. “So you made a trade with Colden. He offered you the house if you took me as your wife. The scandal was averted and you got what you wanted. Lansing Square.”
“Yes.”
Everything was becoming clearer now that she knew the truth. “You spend all your time here searching for clues to your father’s identity. That’s what you’ve been doing in the attic.”
“Yes.” He took a step closer and she stiffened. “I thought this was the only way.”
She shook her head. “And you were willing to sacrifice me to get what you wanted. You were willing to lie to me, deceive me, even after you had experienced those same things in your own past. Even when you knew how deeply lies could cut.”
His face fell. “I-I’m sorry, Katherine.”
“So am I.”
She turned away so he wouldn’t see how much she wanted to touch him. Comfort him. His story moved her, although she hated that it ended with his betrayal. That he was more willing to chase the past than consider her and her future.
But what did she expect? Even while he told her lies about why they married, he had never gone so far as to say he cared for her. Or that he would put her needs above his own. She should have known he wouldn’t. No man in her experience ever had.
“You must be relieved this charade is over,” she said, shaking her emotions off. “Now you can stop pretending you plan to pursue a life with me in it. Now we can each choose our own path.”
The breath he drew in was sharp and loud in the quiet room. She lifted her head to see him shaking his head.
“But—”
She held up a hand. “There’s no need to pretend you ever wanted me now. The truth is out. You married me to obtain this property.”
She shrugged, though she was anything but nonchalant about what he’d done. She wanted to put distance between them. She didn’t want him to see how much power he still had over her.
Turning her ba
ck, she said, “I suppose in some ways, it’s not much different than countless other marriages in society. Many people marry for political or financial gain.” She flinched. “Most aren’t deceived into doing so, but they manage nonetheless. We are married now and have consummated that union…”
She shivered as she thought of how much pleasure she’d taken in that consummation and how much her body still ached for his touch even now.
“What are you saying?” he asked.
His voice was harsh and when she turned he was staring at her with wide eyes.
Her heart flipped, but she crushed her weakness. “The marriage is legal and binding. But now that the true purpose behind it is in the open, there is no reason we cannot continue. I’m more than happy to help you search for the evidence you’re seeking. I think you deserve to know who your father is.”
Dominic stared at her as if she were speaking some foreign language. “And when we have found what I’m looking for, or if it becomes clear that it isn’t here, what then?”
She shrugged. “You will return to London and find a mistress, as we talked about when we first married. And I shall stay here. I love this house.” She looked around her room with a weak smile, then folded her arms. “I think it’s only fair I should keep it since the home I inherited was given away without my permission, or even my knowledge.”
Dominic swallowed, speechless for a long moment. He clenched his fists and shifted his weight. His voice was very low when he said, “Let me be sure I take your meaning. You wish to help me investigate who my father is, but when that investigation is over, you want me to return to London while you stay here. You want to live separate lives?”
Katherine wanted to give an immediate, strong answer in the affirmative. But looking at Dominic, knowing what his arms felt like wrapped around her. How his eyes lit up when he laughed. Remembering how heavenly it felt to give him her body and her heart, it was impossible to disregard him so easily.
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