by Lisa Olsen
“I don’t understand…”
th=ing“I think you should go.” My voice was barely above a whisper, eyes shiny with unshed tears as I rose and went to the door.
Ben sat there in stunned silence for long seconds, before gathering up his coat to leave. He paused right before me, clearly reluctant to leave. “Mercy, I only want to help you. Please…” He gave it one more shot.
“There’s nothing you can do to help me.” I dropped my eyes, saddened because it was true. My trouble with angels was beyond his ability to help. It just would have been nice to have him there to stand by me through it.
“Then you are in trouble.” Ben reached for my face, tilting my head towards him, his voice gentle.
“Not the kind you think.” My head might have turned but I still wouldn’t look at him. I didn’t want to crack, my anger was the only thing keeping me together at the time. “Please, don’t follow me again.”
He hesitated at that. “It’s my job.”
I did look at him then. “Oh really? So if I call your boss right now, he’ll tell me it’s perfectly reasonable that you’re spending time following your ex-girlfriend because you can’t stand your own curiosity? I haven’t done anything wrong, you have no reason to follow me.” My chin came up pugnaciously. I saw him wince at the mention of his boss, but there was a bigger reaction when I said the word ex-girlfriend. Christ, how had things ended up in such a muddle so fast?
“You know what, forget it. Whatever mess you’re in, you’re on your own.” Ben gave up all at once, shrugging on his coat and pulling the door open.
“That’s just what I’ve been saying,” I whispered as he left.
Chapter Eighteen
I wasn’t in the mood to sit in my apartment and eat enchiladas after that. Instead I turned the oven off and stomped out of my place, barely remembering to grab my purse and coat.
There was no clear plan in my mind when I left home. I got into my car and drove, but soon it became apparent that I was heading to Eden. While I wasn’t in the mood to commiserate with Daphne or Sam and I was still ticked off at Matty, I found I didn’t want to be completely alone either. I spent enough of my off days at Eden it wouldn’t raise many eyebrows when I turned up there that night, and I could still be in familiar surroundings.
The club was doing a fairly brisk business when I got there, and both Alice and Jilly were out on the floor with Parker and Luis manning the bar. Luis was a recent hire and the jury was still out on whether or not he could keep up. He seemed to be hustling okay though as I fought my way clear to a seat at the bar. “Rum and diet coke,” I called out over the din, well aware I could have been drinking the same thing at home. Somehow drinking alone at the bar sounded less depressing than drinking alone in my apartment.
Before too long I had my drink and swiveled out to take a look at the dance floor. If Daphne had been there with me I would have joined the throng, but for the moment I was content to sit and watch. And drink.
“Hey, how long have you been here?” Parker asked, sliding a refill across the bar to me.
Heidth="48">“Long enough to need a refill but not long enough to be cut off,” I replied, reaching for the drink.
“No date tonight?” he asked, already working on the next drink order, but staying nearby to talk to me.
I made a face. “No, I’ve had enough interrogation for the night, thanks.”
My answer clearly surprised him, and his hands came up in a supplicating gesture. “Sorry I asked.”
“No…” I reached out and caught his arm, giving it a squeeze. “I didn’t mean you. I’m sorry. It’s been a really shitty day, you know?”
“Sorry to hear that, darlin’.” His face was full of regret. “Next round is on me.”
“Thanks,” I gave him a brief smile. Parker moved off to fill a few more drink orders, and I was left to my people watching. It was compelling enough in the old days, but with the advent of seeing people’s souls it was a beautiful, vibrant performance. Like something out of a sixties musical written on an acid trip. Vastly entertaining, increasingly so the more alcohol I imbibed.
After a while I wanted to be a part of it. Tossing my purse behind the bar, I headed out there, not caring a bit if I was all by my lonesome. And then I wasn’t alone anymore, I was part of the pulsing crowd that parted to accept me. We moved as one large multi-limbed organism to the beat of the music, theew face=" people around me only too happy to include me into their clique. It didn’t matter who was with whom, we all danced and swayed together, and for the first time in a while I felt part of the human race again.
When I finally returned to the bar to cool off, I was hot and sweaty, but happier than I’d been when I arrived. I greeted Parker with a smile as he had a drink ready for me.
“Having a good time?”
“Yeah, a great time,” I held my hair up and away from my neck as I drank greedily, draining half the glass at once.
“You looked good out there.”
The compliment came as a surprise, but I wasn’t in the mood to read too much into it. “You should have come out there to join me, take a break.”
It was his turn to be surprised. “Nah, it’s not my scene.”
“Oh come on, I’ve seen you out there before. You can still move, old man,” I teased lightly. Parker still straddled the hump between thirty and forty by my calculations, not exactly ancient yet. “Come on, what do you say?” I grinned.
“What about your cop?”
I didn’t want to think about Ben. I didn’t want to think about anything. All that sounded good was going out to dance again and maybe another drink. It wasn’t like I was hitting on him. If he didn’t feel like it, it wasn’t any skin off of my nose. “No more cop, no more angel, no more men of any kind.”
Parker gave me an odd look at that response, but I didn’t think he would particularly take my meaning anyway, so I didn’t worry too much about it. “I don’t qualify as a man?”
“Nope,” I smiled cheerily, feeling no pain. “Youan">p; ace=re a boss, you don’t count.”
“I’m pretty sure I still count as a man.” He looked a little disgruntled over the idea.
“Nope, you’re safe. Hence the invite to dance. If I just wanted to rub up against a guy on the dance floor I’d pick…” My eyes scanned the room briefly and lit upon a good looking man who was watching me. “…that guy,” I pointed. “Or maybe…”
“Maybe I’d better take you home,” Parker frowned, setting down the tray of clean glasses he’d pulled down from the extra storage rack.
“I don’t want to go home, I want to go for a walk,” I protested, the night air sounding heavenly. With my new plan in mind, I swung down off the barstool, clinging to the bar for a second as the room dipped and swayed at the movement.
“Okay, yeah. I’m coming with you.” Parker came around the bar in a heartbeat, catching hold of my elbow.
“I don’t need a bodyguard, I can take care of myself.”
“I know you can, darlin’, I want a bit of fresh air myself. Let me get my jacket first.” I should have recognized the placating tone, but I wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders anymore.
“Sure,” I nodded easily, allowing him to steer me towards his office, as though he didn’t trust me enough to let me out of his sight for a moment for fear that I’d leave without him. Parker didn’t take long and soon we stepped outside into the blessedly cool night air. He still had a hold of my elbow but I didn’t mind. We walked in companionable silence for a few minutes, my head clearing enough to form real thoughts again, but still blurry around the edges.
“What’s wrong with me?” I asked finally. “Do I look like a criminal?”
“You? No, of course not. Whoever said you were?” His brows climbed in surprise before realization set in. “Oh wait, it was the cop wasn’t it? You can’t take anything they say to heart, angel, they’re suspicious by nature.” He patted my arm soothingly.
“Don’t call me that, okay?�
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“What, angel?”
“Yeah, I’ve had it up to here with angels, you know?” I lifted my hand up about neck high.
It was clear he didn’t know, but Parker went with it. SomNeww, buetimes it was nice to hang out with someone who rolled with the punches so easily. “Sure, no problem. What should I call you instead…? Let’s see now…” he considered aloud. “How about peaches?”
“Peaches? Why peaches?”
“Because you’re so sweet and you have that peaches and cream complexion.” He tapped my nose, the grin returning to his face.
I rolled my eyes over that one. “Wow, that’s quite a line. Does it normally work for you?” I smirked.
“Eh, about forty percent of the time,” he smirked back. “What about kitten then?”
“Because I’m cute and cuddly?” My voice sounded anything but.
“No, because you have sharp claws that sneak up on a guy,” Parker chuckled. “And because you have this air about you… makes a guy want to take care of you, bring you in out of the rain.” His expression sobered as he studied me.
“Is that what you’re doing right now, Parker? Taking care of me?” I quirked a brow at him.
“Naw, I’m just hoping you’ll let me scratch you behind the ears later.” He pretended to leer, but he couldn’t even keep a straight face as he said it, and we both ended up laughing.
“Why do guys do that?” I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk after the laughter died down. “Say obnoxious things hoping to get a reaction out of you? Has that ever really worked? Has a girl ever said to you ‘oh Parker, I really hoped you’d rub my belly and make me purr’.” I slid my hands up his arms and onto his shoulders, fingers lightly stroking the soft hair at hsof"+0" is neck as I delivered the line in a soft, breathy voice.
Parker swallowed, hands going to my hips as I wrapped my arms around him. “No, can’t say as they ever have.” His voice had dropped, low and intimate in response. For a moment I thought he might try to kiss me and I’d had enough to drink on an empty stomach that for a moment I thought I might not mind so much. But then cooler heads prevailed, and we both let go of each other at the same moment.
The last thing I needed was for Parker to come under my angelic sway. I needed him as a boss and a sometimes friend and nothing more. “I’m sorry. I know I’m a little drunk. Maybe we should sit down for a minute?” I suggested.
I wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed by the suggestion, but he gave a nod and an easy smile. “You want to get a cup of coffee? There’s an all night diner not too far from here.”
“No… wait.” I looked up and saw the spire down the street. “Come on,” I grabbed his hand, tugging him towards the church.
“A church?” Parker didn’t even attempt to disguise the skepticism in his voice. “Are they even open at thvennbsp; Pais hour?”
“Only one way to find out, come on.” I all but dragged him to the building, climbing up the stone steps to the huge double doors. To my delight, they swung open easily. “See, told ya!” I crowed triumphantly, only then suppressing my volume with a peal of giggles as I saw a couple of heads turn our way. From the souls of the denizens inside, I suspected they were there more for the warmth and the light rather than any real desire to be closer to God. But maybe that was uncharitable of me.
“I don’t know about this, Mercy.” Parker looked distinctly uncomfortable as I pulled him across the threshold.
“Oh, stop complaining, it’s not like you’re gonna burst into flame or anything,” I whispered. Linking my arm through his I pulled him deeper into the church. I couldn’t help but wonder how long it had been since he’d set foot into a church. It had been a few years myself, I’d had enough Catholic guilt to last me a good long while. But as I stepped into the church, I couldn’t deny I felt the same feeling of calm come over me that normally did when I used to attend.
I led him to the front of the church where a block of candles were provided, to say a prayer for family and loved ones. Adam immediately came to mind, and I lit a candle for him, wishing him well wherever it was he’d gone, and prayed for a safe return sooner than later. It crossed my mind it might be wrong to pray to God for something like that it , considering God was the one who’d damned him. I sent the words out as more of a wish delivered to the universe rather than petitioning directly to God for Adam’s safety.
Parker still looked uncomfortable, but allowed me to steer him towards a seat in the front pew while I looked at the ornate altar. “You want to stay and sit for a bit?” he whispered.
“Yes, for a little while, if you don’t mind,” I nodded.
He was silent for a few minutes and then patted my hand. “How about I leave you here to… reflect for a few, and I’ll go walk back and get the car? That way I can take you straight home from here?” he offered. “You can sit for as long as you like, I’ll be waiting outside.”
I studied him more closely and saw it was more than just being uncomfortable. He really didn’t like being in there. I opened my mouth to ask him what the big deal was, but changed my mind at the last minute, deciding it wasn’t any of my business. “Yeah, okay. Pop your head in when you get back and I’ll be ready to go.”
It was all he needed and Parker was out of there like a shot, leaving me to wonder what it was about churches that bothered him so much.
Left alone to my thoughts, I enjoyed the stillness around me, taking comfort ininge="Times the solitude. Still, I couldn’t quite bring myself to appeal to God in prayer over my own situation. What if he actually took notice of me? What if the Grace gave me a direct conduit? Did I want to bring that kind of scrutiny onto myself? Was it blasphemy to sit in His house of worship when I was an abomination?
I was still thinking that over when the priest approached me, a genial smile on his face. “Hello, Miss, welcome to our parish. We’ll be closing our doors soon, but if you have any immediate needs, perhaps I can… provide you with some counseling this evening?”
There was nothing on his face to indicate there was anything behind his words other than their face value. But the aura surrounding him was pitted and scored with dark blotches. The smile died on my lips, but I worked hard to keep it there, frozen. Suddenly the last place I wanted to be was in that church, especially alone. Not that I expected the guy to jump me right there in the pew, he wasn’t as obvious as all that, but being near him made me feel sick to my stomach.
“I see you.” Maybe it was the alcohol talking, but all at once I dropped the pretense of politeness, scooting to my feet. “Behind your smiles and your pretty words, I see you. And He can see you too, just you wait.” I pointed upwards, to heaven.
The color drained from the priest’s face and a flash of guilt spilled over his features before he regained some of the righteous indignation so many of his kind wore. “I think you should leave,” he spluttered, chest puffing out.
“What a good idea.” I did smile then, even though I knew I mush Id smilt look and sound like a lunatic. He was gonna get his sooner or later. Only I hoped for sooner… suddenly I understood Sam’s need to mete out judgment. I didn’t have that recourse, but wondered if a few phone calls wouldn’t hasten the guy’s judgment day a little?
Of course I had no idea who to report the guy to, but it was worth digging into a bit. Maybe Ben would… no, I couldn’t exactly ask Ben about it anymore, could I? How could I explain why it was I suspected the guy of being a scumbag when all he’d done was say two sentences to me? Besides, Ben wasn’t even talking to me anymore, I remembered belatedly. It was with a heavy heart I started down the church steps to wait for Parker outside.
A man lounged on the bottom step, shabbily dressed, dirty. I took him for one of the homeless on his way up for a bit of warmth in the church.
At least, I thought he was a man…
As I drew closer, something began to bother me. Something was off about the guy, and then I realized… he had no aura at all.
It was like his soul
was completely absent. “Oh, that can’t be good…” I murmured, slowing my pace and looking up the street for any sign of Parker. He must have thought I’d be a while longer in the church because he took his sweet time in getting back to me.
The closer I got, the more uncomfortable I began to feel, even more so when his dark eyes lit upon mine. He smiled a terrible smile, and I noticed his teeth gleamed brightly in the uncertain light. They looked very, very sharp.
“spy iont size="+0" face="Times New Roman">‘Ello, pretty,” he grinned, delighted I’d turned up. “Look at you all bright and shiny like Christmas mornin’.”
Why did I feel more like I was the Christmas goose?
“Leave me alone. I don’t want any trouble.” I stopped stock still on the steps, not wanting to get even an inch closer to the man who wasn’t a man. I don’t know what he was, but I knew for certain it wasn’t human.
“Trouble?” he chortled, taking a step closer and then another. “I likes trouble.”
To my dismay, he didn’t move with the shambling gate one might expect from his getup, in fact, he was pretty spry. “Yeah, well I don’t, so unless you want a mouth full of broken teeth, back off.” It was all talk, of course, but there was a small part of me that hoped he’d back down at my show of bravado. I noticed I started to glow faintly, and I took it as a good sign.
“Oh, you want to play with old Cephas, do you? I likes to play, pretty. Know all sorts of games. Real divertin’ you might say. ‘Ow’s about me and you play?” There was that glittering smile again as he continued his approach.
The glow surrounding me began to brighten and I focused on gathering the power around me. I wasn’t sure what happened the night I repelled Charles Weatie, but I trusted the Grace to take over at some point and let him have it. The guy continued his advance, enthralled by the growing radiance around me, his expression one of anticipation.
All at once I felt the power intensify and surge forth in a brilliant flash of white light. Fully expecting to see the guy down on the ground from the force of it, to my horror, I saw him basking in it, a look of intense rapture on his face.