I closed my eyes and slumped down into the chair next to the door. I was due to leave for work in a few minutes—I would be picking up Erin from school right after—and I had no clue how I was meant to keep myself together through that whole shift knowing that my nightmare of an ex was likely plotting against me at that very moment. I could have told them what was going on, of course, but I knew the way people looked at single fathers like me. They were all sweetness and light and “you’re doing such an amazing job” until the mother came back looking for their child and they were all convinced that the kid should be with them instead. People always said that a child needed its mother, but they never seemed to appreciate that sometimes the mother was better off as far from her child as humanly possible.
I dragged myself to my feet and went to gather myself for work; I was going to be running late, and I had already accepted it. Maybe work would be good for me—maybe I could get some character references from the people who worked alongside me, the people who had seen for years the way I would slip out early to pick up my daughter or push back a shift to make sure that the babysitter would get there in plenty of time. Or maybe they would hate me for stepping in to cover their shifts at the last minute so many times and would want to spite me. I rubbed my hands over my face and groaned to myself—I wished I could talk to Nina about this, so she could convince me that it wasn’t as bad as all that and that I was overthinking all of this.
I headed out to work and walked in a haze, my mind racing as I tried to figure out the best course of action. I hadn’t even told Ant about the letter, not wanting to worry her. She had already been so set against Nina and me, the last thing I needed to tell her was that she had been right and that Nina was out of the picture already. Or was she? She should at least have the decency to tell me to my face, then at least I would know for sure one way or the other.
I arrived at work and went about my set-up as normal, hoping that nobody would catch on to what was going through my head. I knew I would have to talk about it eventually, but for the time being, I just needed to do something mindless and let all this shit fall to the back of my mind until I had no choice but to deal with it. And I found myself relaxing a little bit: this place was familiar to me, I knew how it worked and how I worked as a part of it. I could slip into my normal role and just let it wash over me, doing my prep for the day and chatting with the other guys about what they were doing over the weekend and their plans when they got off work that evening.
I was about to duck outside and take my break, and I headed to the cloakroom to grab my jacket. If I hadn’t been on such high alert, I likely wouldn’t even have noticed the small piece of paper poking out of my pocket. But as soon as I did, my heart sank, and panic started running through my nervous system. What the fuck?
I grabbed it and squinted at it in the dark of the room; the letters were enormous, big enough that I could make them out even in the dark.
“LET IT GO.”
My heart was pounding in my chest, and I knew I had to save this as evidence for the case. But the first thing on my mind was figuring out how the hell Samantha had managed to get into my work—and how she even knew where I was employed.
I went to find Elijah, who took one look at my face and picked up on the fact there was something amiss.
“Logan, what’s going on?” he asked, and I gestured for him to come closer. I held the note up in front of him, not caring who else in the kitchen saw. More witnesses for me when I had her charged with stalking me.
“I found this in my pocket,” I told him. “Another note like before.”
“Shit,” he furrowed his brow, looking genuinely concerned. “Do you know who might be giving these to you?”
“Yeah, I have an idea.” I nodded grimly. “That woman, the one I mentioned before? I think she’s the one giving them to me. And I think I know why.”
“But nobody’s been in here.” He shook his head, the furrow in his brow growing deeper than before. “Just the staff. We’re not even open yet.”
“Well, it wasn’t here when I left the house this morning,” I told him. “And the streets were quiet, so it wasn’t like anyone could have snuck it to me then.”
“Jesus.” He ran his hands through his hair and looked upset. “You want me to pull the CCTV? I can try and figure out how someone got in here …”
“Honestly, if you could pass along a copy of the tape, that would be great.” I nodded. “I need to prove what’s happening here.”
“Is there something going on?” Elijah asked. “Something we can help with?”
“Yeah, there’s something going on, but I don’t really want to go into it right now,” I remarked, glancing back at the kitchen. I could see a few of the guys looking at me, and I knew they had to be wondering what was going down. They might pretend they weren’t gossips, but in a kitchen, communication basically functioned through whispers about this person or that one. I didn’t want to say anything that could get in the way of the case I was going to pull against Samantha.
“Okay, well, if there’s anything we can do to help, you just let us know, alright?” Elijah clapped a hand to my shoulder. “We’re here for you.”
“No need to get all soppy on me,” I shot back, busting his balls the way I always did.
He grinned. “Take your break; I’ll cover the rest of your prep.” He nodded to the door. “Service starts in ten, just make sure you’re back for that, alright?”
“Will do,” I saluted him, and I turned to head out the door, stuffing the note back into my pocket. She had referred to our daughter as an “it.” That was what bothered me the most. She didn’t even see her as a person, just a pawn she could use to get one over on me the way she wanted. She wasn’t going to get close to Erin. I would make sure of that.
Chapter 17
Nina
How long had it been since I had seen him? Long enough that I was starting to forget what his touch felt like, the sound of his voice. How it felt to be wrapped in his arms, to be taken care of by that loving touch of his. Long enough that I was certain that my need for him should have begun to fade by now, but I only found it growing stronger and more defined with each day that passed.
But I forced myself to stay away. Ant had told me that his ex was in town and was doing everything she could to get hold of little Erin, and the last thing Logan needed was the complication of keeping me around on top of that. He had reached out a few times, going as far as to slip a note beneath my door, but I had kept to myself, even though it pained me to do so. I wanted to see him, to find some way to tell him to his face that I wanted to be with him, but everything seemed in such a terrible mess I didn’t want to get in the middle of it and make things worse.
The argument that I’d overheard with that ex of his was still ringing in my ears, pulsing in my brain every time I wasn’t specifically focused on something else—what if, somehow, she was actually right? What if he really was still in love with her? He hadn’t moved on, after all, and for a guy with his charm and his looks that was profoundly strange. I assumed that since nine years had passed since the birth of his daughter, he would be firmly out of the rebound stage now. But perhaps I was wrong. Or maybe she was a liar, just like Ant had tried to assure me. I had no idea who to believe, what to think, who to trust, and the whole thing was making my head hurt.
“You should talk to him,” Ant urged me. She asked me why the hell I had cut things off with Logan so quickly, after getting the story back from her brother, and I told her the truth, getting her to swear to me that she wasn’t going to share it with him, at least not until I had the chance to talk to him about it first.
“I don’t want to pile more stress onto him.” I shook my head sadly. “You don’t think the two of them are going through enough right now as it is? The last thing they need is me throwing a big pile of relationships bullshit right on top of that.”
She pressed her lips together, and I could tell that she was struggling not to offer fur
ther comment on the relationship; she had promised to keep her oar firmly out of whatever happened between Logan and me, but it was proving perhaps a little harder than she imagined. I knew there was so much she wanted to say to me, to Logan, to both of us together, but whatever, it was between Logan and I, and not her, no matter how close to the two of us she was.
“I’m just saying …” she held her hands up. “I’ve never seen either of you as protective of a relationship as you were with one another. That has to mean something.”
I fell silent. She was right. I had never been willing to go to mat for someone I was dating before I’d met Logan, and I knew he felt the same way about it. Maybe I should just … maybe we could find a way …
“No.” I shook my head firmly. “He needs to figure out everything with his ex first, whatever it is. I don’t want anything to do with that.”
“Fine.” She sighed heavily and trailed her finger around the rim of the glass that she was drinking from. The two of us were in my apartment, and she was due to head upstairs to look after Erin for a few hours not long from now; she had invited me to join her, but I wanted some time to myself. I had been taking a whole lot of that lately, it seemed.
“So, if we can’t talk about relationship stuff, what about work?” she asked, changing tack. I groaned and waved my hand.
“Work isn’t so great right now either,” I admitted. “I mean, I’m just waitressing. It feels like such a waste of my time, you know? It keeps a roof over my head, but that’s it. I’m so tired of feeling like I’m not going anywhere with my life.”
“I get that.” Ant nodded. “Have you been looking for other jobs? Applying places?”
“I don’t even know where I’d want to apply to,” I admitted. “I don’t have a degree; I don’t have any big qualifications, and there aren’t any big passions in my life that I can chase down. I just … I feel like I’m at a loose end. I feel like my life’s going nowhere right now.”
Ant fell silent, and I looked up and met her gaze and had to laugh when I saw the look on her face.
“Sorry, sorry,” I apologized with a smile. “I know that’s a whole lot to deal with when you have to leave in twenty minutes.”
“Come on, like I can’t put your life back together in that time,” she teased, and she glanced at the clock above the couch. “I’ll finish this and then I’ll get on my way, alright?”
“Alright.” I nodded, and I was already a little relieved at the thought of having the apartment to myself once more. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy her company—far from it. I loved having her around—but recently it had been hard for me to keep up the façade around people, and the more time I spent alone, the less time I had to spend keeping my game face on.
She headed upstairs to take care of Erin, and I cleaned up the wine glasses and went to bed early. Maybe I was a little depressed; maybe I had been putting far too much stock into my relationship with Logan and Erin, finding direction in the way that they treated me, the way that they had welcomed me into their lives. I craved them back, craved the breakfasts with the two of them, craved falling asleep next to Logan and knowing that I didn’t need to sneak out first thing in the morning.
But giving it time and space was the right thing; when everything was figured out with that ex of his, maybe then we could pick up where we left off. If he didn’t already hate me for abandoning the two of them with no explanation.
I was coming back in from work one day and trying not to think about the bad luck regarding the man I had feelings for but couldn’t be with to live in the same building as me. Every time I came through the door, I would find my mind drifting over in his direction, wondering if he was in his apartment or at work or hanging out with Erin or … well, anything, really. Wondering if he was thinking about me while he was doing whatever he was doing.
I went to check the mail, and I was just going through my letters—most of them spam—when I heard a voice that I recognized.
“Let go, you’re hurting me!”
My head snapped up, and my heart leaped into my throat. Was that Erin? It couldn’t be. She would have been at school right now—maybe just back. Whatever or whoever it was, it sounded like a little girl, and she sounded like she was in some amount of pain at that moment. Which meant I had to stick my head in and make sure that everything was alright.
I stuffed the letters haphazardly back into the cubby and turned to find the source of the noise; it seemed to be coming from the small corridor that ran under the stairs and out into the back of the building. I kept my footsteps light in the hopes of catching whoever it was in the act, and, as I rounded the corner and laid eyes on what was waiting for me around the other side, my heart dropped.
I recognized her at once—I had her image burned into my brain from when I’d hurried past her in the street. Samantha. But next to her, the thing that really unsettled me, she had her fingers wrapped around the upper arm of her daughter. Erin looked frightened, her back to me as she tried to tug herself away. Even in the dim half-light of the corridor, I could see the flash of fear in her eyes, as though she wanted nothing more than to get the hell away from this woman and back to the apartment. I swallowed heavily. I had promised myself that I wasn’t going to get involved, but surely, I couldn’t just stand by and let this happen?
“Hey!” I called out and found my voice croaky and hoarse around the edges. I tried again. “Hey!”
This time, the words echoed down the corridor to Samantha and Erin—Samantha had her hand on the door to the back courtyard, and she slowly turned around and plastered a wide, insincere smile on her face, like she could fool me.
“Oh, hello,” she greeted me, instantly letting go of Erin’s arm. “Can I help you? Are you lost?”
Even though her tone was sweet on the surface, I could hear the barbed edges beneath and knew she wanted nothing more than for me to back off and let this happen. I stood my ground, even though my legs were shaking a little. It was just starting to sink in what was really happening, and I knew this was a crucial moment; if I gave her even a hint of a chance to get out of here, she would take it, and there might not be any getting her back if she managed to escape.
“Do I know you?” I asked conversationally, hoping that I would be able to keep her talking long enough for someone else to arrive, someone who might have a better idea of what the hell to do in a situation like this.
She cocked her head at me and stared for a long time as though trying to figure me out. “No.” She shook her head firmly. She was still mostly shrouded in shadow, but Erin had shifted an inch or two forward into the light and was staring at me intently, not drawing her eyes from mine. I flicked my gaze to her and gave her a brief smile, letting her know that I at least knew who she was and that I wasn’t going to let anything bad happen to her.
“Maybe you recognize me,” Samantha cocked her head at me. “I’m Erin’s mother. Perhaps you’ve seen me around.”
“Maybe I have,” I agreed, and my mind was running at a thousand miles a minute as I tried to work out what the hell I was meant to do now that I had her here and talking. I knew that this wouldn’t hold out long, that eventually, she would catch on to the fact that I was stalling her and would carry on with whatever it was she had been doing in the first place. But she had let go of Erin for now, and that was a win that I would take.
“Hey, that reminds me …” I slapped my hand to my forehead, hoping the bad acting was enough to convince her. “Erin, you left something in my apartment. One of your books. Do you remember?”
I widened my eyes slightly at the girl, indicating that she should go along with what was coming out of my mouth, and she nodded at once, shifting another step away from Samantha.
“Yes, I remember,” she agreed.
“Do you want to come to get it now?” I asked, staring at her intently. “I mean if you’re not busy …”
“Yes.” She nodded again, and her body was so stiff it looked as though it might have shattered if
anyone had laid a hand on her.
“Erin, stay with me,” Samantha ordered, her voice suddenly dropping the sugar-sweet tone as she took her daughter by the shoulder again. Erin looked anguished, as though she could tell that something very wrong was happening right now but didn’t have the words to express what—or was simply too afraid to.
“It really won’t take any time at all,” I continued cheerfully, playing at oblivious. “Two minutes, nothing more than that. You’re just headed out to the courtyard anyway, there’s nothing out there that can’t wait.”
“You don’t get to tell me what I do with my daughter,” she snapped back suddenly, and I saw the face of the woman I had seen that first day when she came by the apartment building. Vindictive, sharp, pointed, cruel. I felt a flash of panic, and I knew, above all else, that I had to get that girl away from her mother and to a safe place until Logan could get here.
“Nina,” Erin spoke my name, and I crouched down and held my hand out to her.
“See, she just wants to get her book back,” I told Samantha firmly. “We’ll be back down in two minutes. Promise.”
“Erin, stay here,” Samantha snapped angrily, and Erin stood rooted to the ground as though she was too frightened to move.
“Erin, it’s okay, come over to me.” I squeezed my hands together as I held them out to her, and finally, she pulled away from Samantha and hurried across the corridor to me. I felt a punch of triumph and relief as soon as she was by my side, and then I laid eyes on Samantha, and I knew that this was far from over.
One Night Stand Page 13