“We will,” Clarence and Mae both said.
Katie wanted to remind Mom once more that she wasn’t a little girl but figured there was nothing to be gained by that. In her parents’ eyes, she would always be their little girl.
Katie grimaced at the sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. If I never get married, I’ll never know the joy of being a mother. That thought hurt more than she cared to admit. Ever since Katie had been a little girl playing with her dolls, she’d wanted to be a mother. But some things weren’t meant to be, and she’d have to learn to accept them and make a life for herself without a husband or children.
“We’d better get into the van now,” Clarence said. “Our driver, Bill, is anxious to get going.”
Katie gave Mom and Dad one last hug good-bye. She was just getting ready to climb into the van when a horse and buggy rumbled up the driveway. She waited to see who it was, and her breath caught when Freeman climbed down from the buggy.
“Thank the Lord I’m not too late,” he said, walking slowly toward her.
“Too late for what?” Dad asked, looking at Freeman.
“Too late to speak to Katie.” Freeman stood at her side. “Could we talk in private for a few minutes?”
The rhythm of Katie’s heartbeat picked up speed. “Well, uh, we were just about to leave.”
“I don’t want you to go until you’ve heard what I have to say.”
Katie looked at Dad, hoping for his approval. He stuck his head into the van and said something to their English driver. Then he turned to Freeman and gave a nod. “Bill said he’d wait another five minutes.”
Freeman took Katie’s arm and led her over to the porch. “Can we sit down? My ribs are really hurting.”
She felt immediate concern. “You probably shouldn’t be out of bed. What were you thinking, driving your buggy over here like that when you just came home from the hospital?”
“I didn’t drive myself. Fern’s waiting for me in the buggy.”
“Even so, it’s not good for you to—”
Freeman put his finger against Katie’s lips. “I need you to listen to what I have to say.”
Katie nodded and motioned for him to take a seat in one of the wicker chairs on the porch. Once he was seated, she sat in the chair next to him. “What’d you want to say?”
Freeman grimaced, as though in pain.
“Are you hurting really bad?” she asked.
“Jah, right here.” Freeman placed his hand against his chest. “Why are you going back to Florida, Katie?”
She swallowed a couple of times, hoping she wouldn’t break down in tears. “I ... uh ... think I’ll be happier there.”
He crinkled his nose. “I don’t want you to go, Katie, and well, I wanted to say that if you ever decide to love again, I ... I’d like to be the one.”
Katie’s heart began to pound, and her mouth felt so dry she could barely speak. She’d never expected to hear Freeman say such a thing to her. “What about Eunice? I thought you were going to marry her.”
Freeman shook his head vigorously. “I never planned to marry Eunice. She may have wanted it, but I can’t make a lifetime commitment to someone I don’t love. Truthfully, I don’t think Eunice really loves me, either. I think she’s just looking for a husband, and in due time she’ll find someone else—hopefully someone she really loves.” He reached for Katie’s hand and gave her fingers a gentle squeeze. “It’s you I love, and after I’ve joined the church this fall, I’d like us to be married.” His face sobered. “That is, if you’ll have me.”
A wide smile spread across Katie’s face. “I love you, too, and I’d be honored to be your wife.” The words came out in a wondering tone as the meaning of his words sank in. Freeman loved her, not Eunice.
Freeman stroked Katie’s cheek as he gazed into her eyes. “You’re the girl—I mean, the woman for me. I’ve known it ever since we were kinner.” He leaned closer until their lips were almost touching.
Beep! Beep!
Katie’s eyes snapped open, and her gaze went to the van waiting to take her away. “I’ll be right back!” she hollered over her shoulder as she tore across the yard. When she reached the van, she leaned inside, grabbed her suitcase, and shut the door. “I’m not moving to Florida,” she said, smiling at Mom and Dad. “I’m staying right here, and when the time is right, I’m going to marry Freeman.”
Mom looked at Dad, and Dad looked at Mom. Both of their faces broke into wide smiles.
Katie handed her suitcase to Dad then hurried back to the porch and took a seat beside Freeman.
“Were your folks happy to hear that you’re staying?” he asked.
Katie nodded and smiled. “I used to think that God never answered any of my prayers, but I’ve come to realize that He answered every one—just not always the way I wanted Him to.” She reached over and boldly took Freeman’s hand. “‘God hath not given me the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.’ He’s answered my prayers and helped me deal with my panic attacks. Best of all, He’s given you to me.”
Freeman leaned close to Katie, and this time there was no horn honking to stop his tender kiss.
Being careful not to cause further injury to Freeman’s ribs, Katie gave him a gentle hug. “I pray that all of my cousins will be there on our wedding day,” she whispered in his ear. “And I pray that God will give us many years together as husband and wife.”
KATIE’S BANANA NUT CAKE
2 cups flour
1 2/3 cups sugar
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
2/3 cup shortening
2/3 cup sour milk or buttermilk
3 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 1/2 cups mashed bananas
2/3 cup chopped nuts
Mix all ingredients thoroughly and pour into a greased and floured 9x13x2 inch pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 35–40 minutes.
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
1. Katie Miller had a difficult time accepting her boyfriend’s death, and she went through a period of depression. Has someone you know gone through something similar? If so, how did you try to help that person work through her or his depression?
2. List some ways you can help someone going through depression. What should you not do when someone is depressed?
3. Did Katie’s folks do the right thing by sending her to live with her grandparents after Timothy died? Do you think Katie’s parents were supportive or too controlling?
4. When Katie returned to Indiana, her depression turned into anxiety attacks. At first Katie tried to hide the attacks, feeling embarrassed and confused by her unexplained symptoms. Have you or someone you know ever suffered from anxiety or panic attacks? If so, was the person experiencing the attacks embarrassed by the symptoms? Did that person tell someone about the feelings or try to hide them?
5. Why it is important to share your feelings with someone when you’re depressed or experiencing some other kind of emotional problem?
6. What are some ways you can help someone dealing with anxiety or panic attacks? Is there ever a time when a person can deal with these kinds of attacks alone, or does the person always need the guidance of a trained professional?
7. When Loraine miscarried, she was deeply saddened, although she accepted the miscarriage as God’s will. What are some ways you can help someone who has lost a baby?
8. When Katie found a baby on her porch and decided not to notify the sheriff right away, she told Freeman about it. Did Freeman do the right thing when he agreed to keep Katie’s secret? What would have been a better way for Freeman to help Katie?
9. Is there ever a time when it’s all right to gossip or talk about someone’s problems?
10. Eunice was jealous of the attention Freeman gave Katie, so she gossiped about Katie and tried to make her look bad. What should a person do when she knows someone is gossiping about her?
11. Wha
t life lessons did you learn from reading A Cousin’s Prayer?
12. Were there any verses of scripture that spoke to your heart? If so, in what way might you use that scripture to deal with some situation in your own life?
13. What did you learn about the Amish way of life that you didn’t know before?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
WANDA E. BRUNSTETTER enjoys writing about the Amish because they live a peaceful, simple life. Wanda’s interest in the Amish and other Plain communities began when she married her husband, Richard, who grew up in a Mennonite church in Pennsylvania. Learning about her Anabaptist great-great grandparents increased Wanda’s interest in the Plain People. Wanda has made numerous trips to Lancaster County and has several friends and family members living near that area. She and her husband have also traveled to other parts of the country, meeting various Amish families and getting to know them personally. She hopes her readers will learn to love the wonderful Amish people as much as she does.
Wanda and her husband have been married over forty years. They have two grown children and six grandchildren. In her spare time, Wanda enjoys photography, ventriloquism, gardening, reading, stamping, and having fun with her family.
In addition to her novels, Wanda has written two Amish cookbooks, an Amish devotional, several Amish children’s books, as well as many novellas, stories, articles, poems, and puppet scripts.
Visit Wanda’s Web site at www.wandabrunstetter.com and feel free to e-mail her at [email protected].
OTHER BOOKS BY WANDA E. BRUNSTETTER:
INDIANA COUSINS SERIES
A Cousin’s Promise
DAUGHTERS OF LANCASTER COUNTY SERIES
The Storekeeper’s Daughter
The Quilter’s Daughter
The Bishop’s Daughter
BRIDES OF LANCASTER COUNTY SERIES
A Merry Heart
Looking for a Miracle
Plain and Fancy
The Hope Chest
SISTERS OF HOLMES COUNTY SERIES
A Sister’s Secret
A Sister’s Test
A Sister’s Hope
BRIDES OF WEBSTER COUNTY SERIES
Going Home
On Her Own
Dear to Me
Allison’s Journey
White Christmas Pie
NONFICTION
The Simple Life
Wanda E. Brunstetter’s Amish Friends Cookbook
Wanda E. Brunstetter’s Amish Friends Cookbook, Vol.2
CHILDREN’S BOOKS
Rachel Yoder ... Always Trouble Somewhere Series:
School’s Out! (Book 1)
Back to School (Book 2)
Out of Control (Book 3)
New Beginnings (Book 4)
A Happy Heart (Book 5)
Just Plain Foolishness (Book 6)
Jumping to Conclusions (Book 7)
Growing Up (Book 8)
The Wisdom of Solomon
BACK COVER MATERIAL
Learning TO LIVE AND LOVE AGAIN
A year after her boyfriend was killed, a traumatized Katie Miller returns to her Amish community in Indiana, struggling with depression and panic attacks. Will she ever find the courage to face her inner demons?
Freeman Bontrager has been interested in Katie ever since they were in school. Now that Katie is home, Freeman finds excuses to spend time at the Miller house. Is there any future for him with this emotionally scarred woman, or should he turn to the fair beauty Eunice Byler?
When a mysterious package appears on Katie's doorstep, Freeman's loyalty is tested. Will he win her trust only to lose his standing with her parents?
What will it take for Katie to overcome her fears and dare to live—and love—again?
Award-winning, bestselling author WANDA E. BRUNSTETTER and her husband live in Washington State but take every opportunity to visit friends in Amish settlements throughout the States.
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