***
November 2, 1896
Grace sensed the change in Owen. Since that day the two of them had gone on the trail ride, two weeks had passed, and the two of them had spoken nary a word to each other except for simply pleasantries out of politeness. The tension was heavy, and she was confused by it. Why should there be tension at all? We are only friends, and he has a girlfriend back home that he loves.
Deep down, she found that she still yearned for him. He would walk into the room, and she would feel her mood pick up. If they made eye contact, her heart would flutter. On those, now rare occasions, that he would spend more than a few minutes in conversation with her, she would positively flush.
This morning there was a bit of excitement in the air. Word had reached them that Constance’s boyfriend was expecting to arrive in town, and would be stopping by. He lived about a day’s ride north of the house, and didn’t often get the chance to travel down to visit, but when he did he would usually stick around for a few days.
Grace had overheard Owen and his sister talking about her boyfriend’s arrival, and both felt that if he planned to propose it would be this visit. With winter quickly approaching, he would not have too many more opportunities to propose, and he would want to have enough time to prepare for a wedding and to move in together before the weather took a turn for the worse.
“Good morning.” Grace was startled by Owen’s voice behind her. He rarely was quiet enough getting out of bed that she wasn’t aware of his being awake long before he emerged from the loft.
“Good morning Owen. Sleep well?” Grace asked with a warm grin.
“Yes, as a matter of fact. Like a baby.” Owen answered and then sat down at the table across from Grace. “My sister isn’t up yet?”
Grace stood, walked into the kitchen, and retrieved a mug from the cupboard. After pouring a cup of coffee, she returned and handed it to Owen, and then sat down. “Haven’t seen or heard anything from her yet.”
“Thank you.” Owen said as he lifted the mug to his lips. “That is surprising. I thought she’d be the first one up since Walter is stopping by today.”
“I know! She is really nervous about is visit. I tried to tell her to let happen what happens, and not to worry about the rest. If it’s meant to be, then there is nothing that could stand in the way.” Grace said, her thoughts moving toward the awkward relationship that she and Owen had developed for a moment, then she pushed it out of her mind and refocused on Constance.
“You are right.” Owen looked as if he might have more to say, but stopped himself short.
As the two of them sat in silence, Grace found herself yearning to hear him talk, and wondering what had happened and why he had suddenly taken to such an aversion to her. She didn’t ask though, and instead reminded herself, as she always did, that it was for the best anyway. She really could not open herself to him and even hint to him that she might be interested in him. He was in love with another, and that would only spell disaster for her. She was glad that there would soon be another face in the crowd, maybe she and Owen wouldn’t have this many uncomfortable moments alone together.
Grace was thankful when she heard the door open to Constance’s room. She looked up and saw her emerge from the hallway still rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Why didn’t you guys wake me up?”
“I figured you wanted your beauty sleep, big sis.” Owen said with a chuckle.
“What I needed was to get up hours ago to get everything ready around here. I want everything to be perfect.” Grace answered unimpressed with her brother’s humorous take on the situation.
“I’ll help you any way that I can. The place will look great.” Grace offered. “Just point me in the right direction.”
Constance didn’t seem to hear Grace, as she began to run a broom across the already very clean looking floor with a frantic effort.
“Relax sis! The house looks great already. Ever since Miss Russell moved in and took some of the pressure off of you, I don’t think that the house could look any better.”
Grace blushed, and then got up and retrieved a rag from the kitchen started wiping down the kitchen counters, which also didn’t have a spot on them. “Now Owen, the house needs to be at its best. I’m sure that you’d feel the same if your gal from back east was expected to arrive today.”
It was the first time that Owen’s girlfriend had been mentioned by either of them since the day of the trail ride. Grace noticed the color leave Owen’s face in an instant, and his smile just as quickly turn into a frown.
“That’s true. I would want it to be perfect.” Owen said, his entire mood suddenly very somber.
Constance had walked out the front door to sweep off the porch and missed the exchange. Upon coming back in she noticed her brother’s sudden change of mood. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
“I’m sorry that I mentioned her, Owen.” Grace interjected. “I know that you miss her.”
“It’s not that. I mean it is, but it ain’t.” Owen swallowed hard. “I just don’t want to talk about it, if that’s ok.”
“Did you she write you back?” Constance asked, ignoring her brothers desire to end the conversation. “Did she say something?”
“I told you I didn’t want to talk about it.” Owen said more loudly than before, his patience growing thin. “But if you have to know, I haven’t heard anything back from her. But that is not what’s bothering me, and I think you know that.” With that said, he slipped into his boots and went out the front door.
Grace had not known that he had written to his girlfriend. It’s none of my business anyway. She thought, but still found herself filled with curiosity and felt guilty for having mentioned the girl to him. She kicked herself for doing that.
“I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to upset him. I only mentioned his girlfriend in passing.” Grace said, her stomach in knots.
“Don’t worry about it. It’s not your fault.” Constance said.
“I just didn’t realize it would upset him.”
“What exactly did you say?”
“I just said that he would want the house to be perfect, also, if she were showing up today.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong. He is just upset because he is conflicted, and he was hoping to hear back from her by now, hoping that would help set his mind at ease.”
Grace felt confused. What could he be so conflicted about? He loves her.
Clearing a lump from her throat, she hesitated before asking, unsure if she really wanted to know the answer. “So he wrote to her then?”
“Yes, the day after your trail ride. I’m not sure what he said in the letter since I didn’t read it, but he told me that he was going to put the thought out there to her that he might be able to return since you are here. He wants to find out how she feels about that.”
“Is there any doubt about how she feels about it?” Grace tried not to show her optimism about the chances that the girl might not feel the same about Owen as he feels about her. “They love each other, right?”
Constance stopped the house work that she was doing and turned her attention squarely on Grace. “They were a couple before we left for Montana. They’ve known each other for a long time, and I know that she would have married him in a heartbeat had they both been just a little older. But time and distance can change a person.”
“So he has doubts that she still loves him then.” Grace said, only vaguely aware that her thoughts had become spoken words. Inside, she felt guilty for feeling good about another person’s interior turmoil, but she couldn’t help herself.
“Actually, no.”
Constance’s blunt response instantly brought Grace back to reality and she chastised herself yet again for desiring someone so strongly, that she knew she could never have. She wished that she had never started this conversation.
“Listen Grace,” Constance said, interrupting her thoughts. “I have known my brother for a long time and I have never broke his confi
dence before, but I can tell you are hurting.”
“What? What are you talking about?” Grace asked, almost afraid of what might be coming next. “I’m not hurting. Why would you say that?”
“Oh come on, Grace.” Constance gave Grace a consoling look as she spoke. “We are both women, and we pick up on these things. I know that you have fallen for my brother.”
Grace was shocked at her words. Have I been so obvious? She thought. She struggled to figure out how to respond, but came up with nothing.
“There is no use denying it, Grace. It is obvious in the way you hang on his every word, and your eyes give it away every time he walks into the room.”
“Fine, I’ll admit it. But I’ve done everything that I can to stifle my feelings ever since I found out about her. You have to believe that. I hope I haven’t done anything to be the cause of his confliction unknowingly.”
“I do believe you.” Constance said. “Look, it’s not my place to say, and like I said before, I’ve never violated a confidence with my brother before, but you may not intend to be a source of confliction for him, but you are.”
“Oh my.” Grace had a million thoughts running through her mind. “He told you that he is conflicted because of me? I’ve tried very hard to hide my feelings. I really don’t want to be a point of confliction for him, and to be honest, I am not eager to get my heart broken either.”
“It’s not your fault. You see, he told me that he had never had a moment of doubt about how he feels about his girlfriend until that day that you first showed up. He said that every day he is around you his doubts grow, and it has been worse for him ever since the trail ride. He wrote to her because he was hoping that hearing from her would put to rest the doubts that he is having, but he still has not heard back from her.”
“I’m so sorry. Maybe I should find a job in town so that I can move out. I should never have stayed here this long, it’s just that I like it here so much.” Grace was overcome with grief as she spoke, but held back her tears.
“You can do that if you feel it is best, but you are more than welcome to stay here longer. We’ve really enjoyed having you here to. You’ve become like a sister to me.”
The two women embraced in a hug briefly. “I appreciate it, but I think I should start looking for a job tomorrow. I do have strong feelings for your brother, but I don’t want to be the cause of his relationship with her falling apart. If that happened on its own simply because their feelings for each other have changed, without my putting undue influence on him, then I would welcome any interest that he might have in me. But I would never want to marry a man that might later come to regret his decision and wish that he was with the other woman.”
“I understand. And I’ll support your decision completely.” Constance said.
“Please promise me you won’t tell him the reason that I am planning to move out, or that we have talked.” Grace asked.
“I promise. We girls have to look out for each other, and you are making your decision for the right reasons.” Constance hugged her again, and then both women turned the attention back to the housework.
CHAPTER 8
Later that afternoon, Grace heard the sound of a wagon pulling up to the property. Constance heard it too and quickly retrieved her brush and mirror to make some quick touch-ups to her hair.
Grace could hear the two men greeting each other. Owen had been outside working in the barn ever since walking out of the house earlier in the morning, and it was the first time she had heard his voice since then. She felt the familiar flutter in her heart at the sound of his voice, but quickly squelched it.
Constance, satisfied that she had done her best with her hair, rose and started for the door but stopped. Turning toward Grace, “Come. I’d like to introduce you to my beau.”
Grace rose and walked out onto the porch with Constance. There the two women stood and waited as the men approached. Grace imagined how that this is how it would be if the two men were married to Constance and her, but forced herself to put the thought out of her head. It’s just not right to think like that!
Though she knew that Constance had been eagerly awaiting Virgil's arrival, she admired the other woman’s self-discipline as she forced herself not to run to him, forcing him to make the move to approach her. She wished that she had the same level of self-discipline. Maybe things would not be getting this out of hand.
Owen walked up to the steps leading to the porch, but held back, allowing Virgil to approach is sister alone. Grace could see what Constance saw in Virgil. He was about 10 years old than Owen, but every bit as handsome. He removed his hat as he looked into Constance's eyes and smiled, seemingly unaware of Grace’s presence beside her.
“I am so happy to see you again, Mrs. Abel.” Virgil said as he took Constance’s hand and lifted it to his lips.
“Mr. Thomas. I am glad you came. How was your trip?” The poise of the older woman impressed Grace, and she wanted to be so much like her.
“Very uneventful. I am glad to finally be able to be here to see you again. In fact, I came straight here and haven’t even stopped in town yet to check in at the hotel to drop off my bag.” Virgil laughed.
“This is Miss Grace Russell. She is a friend of ours that has recently moved to Montana and is staying here until she can get settled.” Constance said, gesturing to Grace standing next to her.
“So pleased to meet you, Miss Russell.” Virgil said with a wide grin across his face.
Grace took the Virgil’s outstretched hand and said, “I am pleased to meet you as well, Mr. Thomas.”
“You are a brave one. There are not too many single women that would have the self-confidence to move to Montana alone, but at least you have friends here. How are you enjoying Montana so far?”
“I love it! It is so beautiful and peaceful, not like life on the east coast.” Grace answered with a grin.
Turning toward Owen, who had ascended the stairs and stood beside Virgil and facing Grace, Virgil said, “This one is not only beautiful, but she’s also got fortitude. How come you haven’t married her yet? If you don’t charm her now, you’ll soon have to ward off all the single men from these parts with a stick!”
His comments to Owen brought laughter from everyone. Having heard so much about him already, Grace was not surprised to discover that Virgil was a very charming man. However, Grace found that she also felt just a bit uneasy about the fact that Virgil seemed to focus on her a bit too much, particularly since he had not seen Constance in such a long while. But she decided that he was probably just being polite since he had just met her.
“You are absolutely right, Virgil. I don’t know how much longer we can keep the lid on the kind of prize that we have here. Before too long, we’ll have buggies lined up down the drive way as all the lonely men wait for their chance to introduce themselves to our lovely guest.” Owen spoke to Virgil, but his entire focus was on Grace.
It was the first time that Owen had spoken openly of any attraction to her, and she tried to convince herself that he was just teasing her to follow up the compliment that Virgil had just given her. The look in his eyes as he spoke of her told another story though. And after hearing what Constance had told her earlier, she knew that he meant what he said.
Grace felt a mix of excitement and fear as the she accepted the truth of the situation in her heart. She knew that Owen was interested in her, but she also knew that he loved another girl. She also knew that it wasn’t right, and that she shouldn’t be causing him this kind of confusion right now. It wasn’t fair to him, or to the other girl. And more likely than not, the result of the situation would be that her heart would be broken. She could not have that, and determined that she would begin the following day to look for a job in town so that she could move out.
Her thoughts were interrupted as Constance spoke, inviting everyone inside to catch up over cookies and milk. Virgil took Constance’s hand and the two of them walked inside first. Owen gestured with his hand, indica
ting that he would follow Grace in to the house, and as she turned to walk back in, she felt his hand briefly settle onto the small of her back. She felt her herself swoon. Yes, this is much too dangerous for me. I need to find somewhere else to live as soon as possible. She thought to herself.
***
November 3, 1896
The next morning Owen rose from bed early and walked out to the barn to collect some fresh milk for breakfast. Virgil hadn’t stayed too late because he still had not checked into his room, but promised to return in time for breakfast. He had invited Virgil to go fishing with him at his favorite fishing hole, which was located a short distance past the opposite side of the town from where he lived. Grace, hearing the conversation, had asked if they could drop her off in town. What he found troubling though, was the fact that she told them that her purpose for going to town was to look for a job.
He had not slept well that night, feeling uneasy and confused. He thought that Grace was integrating herself as a solid member of the family and that she was happy staying with them. Perhaps she was just thinking of the future, and desirous of allowing his sister and Virgil to have their privacy, should they soon marry as all expected they would.
Still, he couldn’t shake the heavy feeling that had descended upon him. He didn’t want her to leave. He didn’t want to be apart from her. He knew that he shouldn’t have those feelings, it wasn’t fair to his girlfriend, whom he had never had any doubt he would return for… until now.
As he walked to the barn, he paused to take a bale of hay from the stack just outside the door. He gave a few leaves to the horses before entering the stall that Millie, his jersey cow, was kept in. He gave her the balance of the hay, and gave her a few gentle strokes of his hand across her back before setting up his stool and bucket to milk her.
He felt guilty. What kind of man would allow himself to be in the place to develop feelings for another woman in the absence of the girl that he loved? He had never even entertained a doubt that he would marry his girlfriend before. He had always taken pride about how jealously he guarded his heart and worked to preserve his love for her. Then this beautiful woman walked into his life out of the blue, and from the first day he could not get her out of his mind. Am I really that shallow of a man?
Montana Bound: A Sweet Mail Order Bride Historical (Mail Order Bride Journeys Book 2) Page 6