Soup...Er...Myrtle!: A Myrtle Crumb Mystery (Myrtle Crumb Mystery Series)

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Soup...Er...Myrtle!: A Myrtle Crumb Mystery (Myrtle Crumb Mystery Series) Page 4

by Gayle Trent


  I did all the things with Sunny that I’d wanted to do with Faye while Faye was growing up. But Faye and I hadn’t clicked the way she and her daddy had. Faye would’ve much rather been in the garage tinkering on some project with Crandall than painting fingernails with me. I reckoned that was just how it went. Having Sunny made me feel like I’d been given a second chance.

  “Any new cases?” Sunny asked as I brought out our plastic container filled with manicure supplies.

  “As a matter of fact, Cooper and I are embarking on a new investigation,” I said. “We talked about it last night. You know that food bank and soup kitchen I’ve been volunteering at this week?”

  She nodded. “It’s where you met that woman who needed a coat.”

  “Right. Well, we think somebody connected to that soup kitchen is stealing people’s identities.” I went on to tell her about Opal Grady and Harry Loomis.

  “That’s weird. Is there any way I can help? I’d love to be a part of the sting.”

  “I’ll see what I can come up with. You’ve got a sharp detective-y mind, and this doesn’t seem too dangerous. I’ll see what I can do.” I nodded toward the box. “In the meantime, pick your polish.”

  * * *

  After Sunny left that afternoon, I got to thinking that it wouldn’t hurt to let the M.E.L.O.N.S. know what was going on. I called Bettie Easton, our founder, and asked if she thought it would be possible to call an emergency meeting to be held at my house at five o’clock this afternoon.

  “Myrtle, hon, it’s two-thirty now,” Bettie said. “It’ll take some doin’ to get everybody rounded up on that short a notice. Is it really so important that it can’t wait until tomorrow after church?”

  “I believe it is.” I explained Cooper’s and my concerns to her.

  “Okay, then,” she said. “I’ll be there…and I’ll see what I can do about getting the rest of the M.E.L.O.N.S. to come.”

  * * *

  The M.E.L.O.N.S. started piling into my living room at about a quarter to five. The first to arrive were Tansie and Melvia. Of course, Tansie lived right across the road from me and Melvia’s house was on the left side of Tansie’s, so they didn’t have far to walk. Delphine was next. She lived up the road a piece, and since it was so cold, she drove down. Last to get there was Bettie.

  I’d put Matlock in the backyard at around four-thirty, and then I’d spread a cloth over the coffee table and put out the chocolate chip cookies I’d made. (I’d fixed enough to save a dozen for Cooper.) In addition to the cookies, I had a bowl of pretzels, some mixed nuts, a platter of chips and salsa, and some of those little maple candies. I’d brought a couple of chairs in from the kitchen so the M.E.L.O.N.S. wouldn’t be squeezed together on the couch. (Get it? Squeezed melons?)

  Once everybody had got there and I’d hung up their coats, I told them I had coffee, tea, water, and diet pop. Every one of us except Bettie wanted coffee. Bettie took a bottle of water. I believe she’d heard on Dr. Oz or one of those other talk programs that water was the best thing for you and that you needed something like forty-eleven ounces a day. I’m not arguing about water being good for you, and I drink a lot of it myself. But if I’m having a cookie—and I was—I wanted some coffee to go with it.

  Anyhow, we got all settled in with our cups of coffee and Bettie’s glass of water—I wasn’t about to have a guest drink out of a bottle—and we filled our plates with goodies.

  “Thank you for coming,” I said. “I thought you should be aware of something that’s going on here in town.” I went on to tell the M.E.L.O.N.S. about Opal Grady and Harry Loomis. “Sheriff Norville and I are convinced that Opal, Harry, and who-knows-who-all-else are victims of identity theft. Now, rest assured he’s doing what he can on his end, but he needs us to be his eyes and ears on the inside.”

  Tansie scoffed. “Do you and your boyfriend truly believe the good people in charge of the food bank and soup kitchen are going around stealing identities?”

  “I didn’t say it was the people in charge,” I said. “We think it’s somebody connected to the food bank and soup kitchen, but that could be the folks in charge, the volunteers, or the people who come in off the street to eat.”

  “Oh, you know, it could be one of those poor things who’re down on their luck,” Melvia said. “I hate to say it, but you see that sometimes on the detective shows. Sometimes the reason they’re street people is because they just got out of prison and can’t get a job. It forces them back into a life of crime.”

  Tansie looked down her nose at her sister. “And some people are plain mean, Melvia.”

  “Well….” Melvia nodded. “Yeah.”

  “Yes,” I agreed archly with a pointed look at Tansie. “Some people are mean.”

  Tansie flattened her lips. “If you’re implying that I’m mean, Myrtle Crumb, I’ll have you to know that I forfeited my plans for the evening in order to patronize you by coming over here to this so-called emergency meeting. Don’t seem like much of an emergency to me. And chips and salsa? You couldn’t even make some spinach dip?”

  Danged if that didn’t fry my eggs! I took a deep breath and was getting ready to fire right back at her when Bettie intervened.

  “Now, ladies, please,” she said. “Myrtle has put out some delicious refreshments for us given how much time she had to pull it all together, and I’m sure she didn’t intend to imply that you’re a bad person, Tansie.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “Let’s get back to the important stuff—the identity thefts,” Bettie said. “Does Sheriff Norville really think we could be at risk?”

  “He sure does,” I said. “Now, we’re not a hundred present sure that the point of origin for these identify thefts is the food bank and soup kitchen, but it is the most logical place to start. Take note of anybody milking folks for information they could use to apply for a credit card—mother’s maiden name and social security number and the main two things.”

  “Thank you, Deputy Fife,” Tansie said.

  Like I was Andy Griffith’s bumbling deputy! Well, that did it!

  “If you want to get home in time to un-forfeit those plans of washing that blue hair of yours and watching Lawrence Welk reruns, you’ll let me finish,” I told Tansie.

  “I’ll have you know—“

  Bettie cut Tansie off with, “What about companies, Myrtle? Is Easton’s Used Cars at risk?”

  “I don’t believe so, Bettie. I think it’s harder to pretend you’re a company than it is to pretend you’re some other person,” I said.

  “Poor Opal,” Delphine said. “Did you tell her that you suspect her identity was stolen?”

  “I asked her about the sign warning not to take any checks from her at the grocery store,” I said. “She told me it must be some other Opal Grady. Other than Coop—I mean, Sheriff Norville—maybe wanting to ask her some questions about who might’ve been getting information from her, I’m not sure she needs to know the specifics.”

  “She does if somebody comes after her demanding payment for something she didn’t buy!” Tansie shouted.

  “I figure Sheriff Norville will know the best route to take with her.” I sighed. “Opal is old. I don’t want her to be worrying about something that might not really be an issue for her.”

  “That’s true,” Bettie said. “Her credit is shot, but she never used it anyway. She pays cash for everything.”

  “I agree that we don’t want her worrying herself to death,” said Delphine. “Maybe if some creditor does try to come after her, Sheriff Norville could help her deal with the situation.”

  “I’m sure he would. He has experience with this type of thing,” I said. “And after we catch whoever is doing this, then that should help everybody.”

  “Right…victims and those people the thief might have in his crosshairs right this very minute,” Melvia said with a slow nod.

  She could be dramatic sometimes. I liked it when Melvia showed a little spunk.

  Chapter Six
r />   Sunday was quiet, lazy, and peaceful. I went to church; but after that I came right back home, shed my dress, and put on a bright pink track suit.

  Cooper had to work. Faye and Sunny had made plans with some friends of theirs. So Matlock and I were on our own for lunch and dinner. For lunch, we had a grilled cheese sandwich. I also had a bowl of tomato soup. For dinner, we had baked chicken breasts and mashed potatoes. And, of course, he had his dog food.

  The day was spent reading and watching movies. I’m happy to say I didn’t dwell overmuch on the identity theft case or Heather’s MIA husband. I knew there was nothing I could do about either that drab Sunday, so I was able to relax and enjoy myself armed with the knowledge that I’d be back to work on both first thing Monday morning.

  Sunday was over before I knew it. I went to the food bank and soup kitchen at ten o’clock Monday. I started through the door, but before I could quite grasp what was happening, I found myself being shoved back outside.

  “Just the person I need to help me,” Melvia said, as she propelled me backward through the door. “Help me get something from my car.” She was winking like a signal light.

  I nodded. “Of course. Let’s go.”

  She held to my arm as we crossed the parking lot. “I needed to talk with you away from everybody else.”

  “I kinda gathered that,” I said. “Did you find out something?”

  “Not yet…but I happened to think that we’ve got the soup kitchen covered. So I’ve asked them to let me work in the food bank,” she said.

  “What an excellent idea!”

  She beamed. “Thank you. I thought it was inspired.”

  “It was.”

  “I went in and looked around and said to Doris that it appeared she had plenty of kitchen help and why didn’t I work in the food bank today,” Melvia said. “Doris told me it was whatever I wanted to do, and I said I believed I’d like helping out in there.”

  “Great,” I said. “Keep me posted.”

  “I will.” She started toward the door.

  “Wait. What about the stuff I was supposed to help you carry in from your car?” I asked.

  She flicked her little gloved hand. “That was what they call on television a ruse.”

  “But won’t everybody wonder about it when we go back in?” There’d been several people standing around when she’d requested my help and had all but pushed me back outside.

  Wrinkling her forehead, she said, “Well, I reckon I’ll say I forgot and left it at home.”

  “What was it?”

  “Huh…guess I forgot that too,” she said, and we both laughed.

  * * *

  The soups of the day were clam chowder, chicken with egg noodles, and vegetable. I was glad to see that Opal, Heather, and Heather’s girls were there. I had a few questions for Opal and Heather. Once everyone was served, I took a bowl of vegetable soup and went to sit by Opal. I sat where I could keep an eye on Heather. I didn’t want her slipping out before I could speak with her. I’d been tickled to see that Heather was wearing her new coat when she came in. It looked pretty on her. I hadn’t been able to find a blue scarf, but maybe I’d run across one somewhere.

  “Hi, Opal,” I said as I sat across from her. “Did you have a good weekend?”

  “I did,” she said. “I made a lot of progress on the quilt I’m making. Reckon cold, snowy weather is good for something after all.”

  “Yeah. I finished the book I’d been reading and started another one.” I ate a couple of spoonfuls of soup before I spoke again. I didn’t want to be obvious.

  “You know, I can’t get over somebody right here in Backwater having the same name as you,” I said. “Have you ever had anybody mix the two of you up?”

  “Not that I know of,” Opal said, dipping a piece of roll into her chicken noodle soup. “How do you mean?”

  “You know…people calling and asking you for money because the other Opal had run up a bill…anything like that.”

  She shook her head. “No. Poor thing probably just fell on hard times like the rest of us. I don’t imagine she meant to cheat the grocery store.”

  “No…of course not,” I said. “But if you do ever get a call from somebody telling you that you owe them money, you let me know. We’ll get it sorted out in a hurry.”

  Her mouth was full of soup-soaked roll, but her lips twisted into a closed-mouth grin. Once she’d swallowed, she told me, “You’re a good friend, Myrtle. It’s nice to know you’re willing to look out for me.”

  “Always,” I said.

  * * *

  I’d taken my bowl to the trash and had turned to see what else needed to be done when I saw Heather get up and slip on her coat.

  I went over to her. “Your coat looks beautiful on you.” I smiled at the girls. “Isn’t Mommy pretty?”

  They nodded, and the oldest began jabbering away about her new dolly.

  “They love those dolls,” Heather said. “Thank you again.”

  “You’re so welcome.” I took a deep breath. “Listen, I don’t want to horn in, but I got to thinking about your husband not calling home since Christmas. Do you think he could’ve been in an accident?”

  “Of course not. Surely somebody would’ve called and let me know if Craig had been in a wreck.”

  “But what if it wasn’t a wreck?” I asked softly. “What if he was mugged and his attacker stole his wallet?”

  Heather’s eyes widened. After a moment, she frowned. “And then what? He got amnesia and couldn’t remember who he was? That’s the stuff of soap operas, Ms. Crumb. I’m sure my husband is fine.”

  “I hope so. I just—“

  “I need to get the girls home and down for their naps,” she said. “Please excuse us.”

  I nodded and walked away. There was really nothing else I could do that wasn’t flat-out badgering the woman.

  I noticed that Opal had finished her food, so I went to get her trash.

  “Let me take that for you,” I said, seeing that she was about to do it herself. “You’re a guest here, remember?”

  “Why, thank you.” She nodded toward the door.

  I looked to see Heather and her children leaving.

  “That Heather Flint is a nice-looking girl,” Opal said.

  “She is,” I agreed. “And her daughters are as cute as they can be.”

  “Yep. That husband of hers ought to get back home.”

  I sat down by Opal. “She said he went to Georgia looking for work.”

  “I heard he went to Georgia to keep the law off his tail,” she said. “But I shouldn’t be talking out of turn. I just think she deserves better.” She nodded. “She was here one day without the little ones. She sat and talked with me for the longest time…asked my maiden name…where I grew up…. She was really interested. Not too many young people pay that much mind to a poor old lady.”

  “No,” I said. “They don’t.” I got a cold chill that had nothing to do with the weather.

  * * *

  The first thing I did when I got back home was call Cooper. He was on another line, so I had to wait. While I waited, I let Matlock out into the backyard and I paced.

  “Hello, sweetheart,” Cooper said at last. “How’s my girl today?”

  At the sound of his voice, tears pricked the backs of my eyes and my throat closed up. “I’m not sure.”

  “Myrtle, what is it? Do you need me to come over?”

  “No…I’m probably just making mountains out of mole hills…but I’m afraid Heather might be one of the identity thieves.”

  “The girl you gave the coat to?” he asked.

  “Yes.” I explained to him how Opal had heard that Heather’s husband, Craig Flint, had gone off to Georgia to evade the police. “And Opal also said that Heather talked with her for a long time one day. Said she asked about Opal’s past, her maiden name…all kinds of stuff.”

  “Does Opal think Heather stole her identity?” Cooper asked.

  “No. Opal doesn
’t think her identity has been stolen at all,” I said. “She still believes there’s another Opal Grady running around Backwater…and she feels sorry for her because she’s apparently fallen on hard times or else she never would’ve written that bad check at the grocery store.”

  “Bless her heart,” he said. “She is a trusting soul…. It’ll be easy enough to see if there are any outstanding warrants on Craig Flint. I’ll let you know what I turn up.”

  “Thank you,” I said.

  “And, Myrtle?”

  “Hmmm?”

  “Don’t go making convictions on the slim body of evidence you’ve got, all right?”

  “Okay.”

  “How about I bring us a pizza over after work?” he asked.

  “That’d be nice. I’ll see what’s coming on the movie channel.”

  I’d just let Matlock back inside when Melvia came to the front door. Matlock beat me there. I held to his collar as I let Melvia inside.

  “I’m sorry,” I told her. “Let me see if I can get him to go back outside.”

  “You’d better not! I’m not like Tansie. Matlock doesn’t bother me one bit.” She took off her gloves and petted his big square head. “Got any coffee made?”

  “No, but I can have some fixed in a jiffy,” I said. “I’ve still got a few of them chocolate chip cookies too if you’d like me to warm those up in the microwave.”

  “Please do.” She took off her coat, and I hung it on the coatrack before we went into the kitchen.

  “I was a little surprised Tansie didn’t volunteer today,” I said. “She’s not sick, is she?”

  “No,” said Melvia, pulling out a chair and sitting down at the kitchen table. “She doesn’t want to take part in the sleuthing is what it is. She said she’s got entangled in your crazy schemes before, and she don’t care to get caught up in another one.”

  I put the pod and the water into the coffee pot and turned it on. “Did she tell that to everybody, or just you?”

 

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