“What connections?” She knew very little of her brother’s personal life, which, according to their recent conversations, was exactly the way he preferred it.
“People in the industry, colleagues of mine and your father’s. He’s making a good impression, from what I hear.”
She frowned. “I don’t understand. He’s at school. When is he meeting these people?”
“He has a busy social life. With their campus located in the heart of the city, it’s expected, don’t you think? Rather than wasting time at keggers, he’s working the proper circuits, grabbing odd jobs as they come.”
“Working? He should be studying.”
“I didn’t bring it up to start trouble, bella. I was merely paying a compliment.”
Her brother had a habit of watching the stock market too closely. Chances were he was investing a great deal of the money she’d sent him—via their father—into various shares. “I suppose if he’s keeping his grades up I can’t comment.”
His fingers brushed over hers. “You can always comment. Whether others listen is anybody’s guess. But I’ll listen.”
And that was why she enjoyed him so much. Sawyer always paid attention to her words and never dismissed her feelings, especially when it came to family life, which was all she really had at the moment.
“How’s Slade doing this semester?”
“B’s. Let’s just hope they transfer.”
“Transfer? Where’s he going?”
His lips parted, his words hesitating a split second. “I thought you knew. He’s transferring to Lucian’s school in the spring. Next year they plan on splitting an apartment.”
“Lucian didn’t tell me any of this.”
Although it made sense. Lucian had wanted to attend the same school as Slade. Sawyer’s son seemed to visit her brother every weekend. But still, he should have let her know he planned to move out of the dorms. “I swear, sometimes I wonder who’s actually in charge.”
He caught her hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. “He’s an adult, Isa. Let go of the reins. I’m pretty confident your brother will do just fine.”
After dinner they moved to the couch and he put on a movie. She wasn’t interested in watching television, but she liked the opportunity to snuggle close and touch him freely. Each stolen caress heightened her desire to have him.
Sawyer’s hand rested on her thigh like a weight of temptation. She hardly paid attention to the television, her full focus on willing that hand to move higher. When his fingers curled against her knee, making slow whirls over the material of her pants, one would have thought she was being fondled in the most intimate of places.
Her feet slowly dropped to the floor and her knees eased apart. He spared her a sidelong glance and smiled, his focus returning to the screen. It took eons for his hand to work its way back up her thigh and by the time he was only a few inches from her sex she was soaked.
Her heart pounded with wanting, but his composure seemed unshakable. Biting down on her lip, she glanced at his profile, his focus still on the movie. She casually rested her hand over his, lacing her fingers in the space between his knuckles. He spared her another smile, but seemed oblivious to the havoc his hand was causing.
Drawing in a deep breath, she sucked in her stomach and pulled his hand to the center of her thighs. His head turned and he looked at her, eyes assessing.
Still nibbling her lip, she held his gaze and flicked open the button of her pants. Without breaking eye contact, she guided his hand inside of her panties and watched as his pupils expanded.
His finger slid through her arousal, slipping between her folds and drawing a sigh from her lips. He pressed a long finger as deep as it would fit and she eased her body into the couch cushions, parting her thighs more.
No longer watching the television, he pulled back and thrust his finger deep again, startling her with the intensity of his penetration.
His eyes darkened as his lashes lowered. “Is this what you want?”
Her breath labored as she held his challenging stare, refusing to shy away from her body’s desires. “Yes.”
He filled her with another finger, stretching her and teasing a sensitive spot deep inside. “You’re soaked.”
Her hands moved to the cushion of the couch, showing him she wouldn’t stop him from touching her. His gaze traveled over her body, and he turned to fully face her, slowly pumping his fingers into her sex.
Soft keening moans passed her lips as he worked his hand between her wet flesh and damp panties. The longer he touched her the more restless she became. Her hands couldn’t keep still. She cupped her breast through her shirt and arched into his touch. That seemed to entice him. He withdrew his fingers, shifted so he was kneeling in front of her and yanked off her pants, stripping her from the waist down.
“Spread your legs.”
She complied and his mouth dropped to her sex, his fingers stabbing deep as he drove her into a rapid fit of pleasure. Every time they were together it was better than the last. He made her feel like a woman, sexy and desirable.
She loved when they made love. But more than anything, she loved the way his attention felt, unsure what neglected part of her psyche he was mending, but knowing it needed everything he provided.
Before long his clothing was tossed aside and he was driving into her with hard thrusts. The movie played, an insignificant backdrop to their sighs of pleasure. He exceeded her growing expectations and in the end she was deeply satisfied and deliciously sore.
The movie came to a close and they held one another through the credits, the soundtrack a soft backdrop to her fanciful thoughts as they rested. All too soon, she found herself dressing. He walked her to her car and kissed her goodnight. “Can I see you again next Monday?”
She tried not to overreact at the idea of not seeing him for a solid seven days. “Sure. And maybe we could see each before then, too.”
His smile was too gentle to reach his eyes. He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “I don’t want to monopolize your time, bella.”
“You’re not. I have plenty to spare.”
His eyes creased. “You should be going out with friends your own age. I don’t want you to wait around for moments when we can be alone.”
But her friends were all in college or had moved away to start new jobs. The few that remained in the area were planning futures and falling in love or already in love and starting families. Every month she received another Save the Date card in the mail. All she seemed to do was wait from one wedding to the next. And every time she forked over another sizable wedding gift she wondered if it was her attendance those old acquaintances were after or a Patras check.
Now she feared her relationship with Sawyer would be another waiting game she’d have to endure. “Sawyer, are we only going to see each other once a week?”
His gaze skated away from her face for a split second. “Bella, I haven’t been with anyone in a long time. Is it too much to ask that we ease into this?”
She supposed taking it slow was okay. “What about other women?” The thought of him touching someone else the way he touched her made her stomach turn. “I’d like it if we were monogamous.”
“I have no issue with monogamy. You’re the woman I want.”
Relieved, she smiled. “So, no one else.”
He hesitated. “There may be certain functions, social things that require I bring a guest. In situations like that I usually attend with a colleague who has something to gain from networking the event.”
She frowned. “Are you talking about fundraisers and things like that?”
“Yes. Social obligations. Benefits that better a cause by the number of guests that attend. It’s frowned upon to go to such things alone.”
She supposed it would be fine if he was only bringing colleagues. “As long as we’re monogamous, I suppose that’s fine.”
“If there’s ever a time…” His words drifted off. “I won’t hold you back, Isadora. We can
be exclusive, but if you met someone … I’d understand.”
The chances of her meeting anyone were unlikely. Her life was pretty consumed by Toni’s schedule. “We’ll cross that bridge when, and if, we come to it.”
“Fair enough. So I’ll see you Monday?”
Knowing he’d already met her biggest demands, she didn’t want to sound unsatisfied. Monday wasn’t too far away. She could manage that. It was still early and he wanted to ease into things. She could be patient.
“I’ll see you Monday.”
“I look forward to it.” He shut her car door and remained at the front door as she pulled away.
The sadness that filled her with every lengthening mile seemed natural. Most lovers probably suffered such longing when they separated, not to mention how greedy she was for the physical part of their relationship.
As the weeks followed, she and Sawyer continued to meet on Mondays and Toni slowly accepted that her friendship with Susan was a private and important one. Sawyer did his thing throughout the week and she … well, she did hers.
With the holidays approaching there was always something to occupy her time. Wednesdays were her only free evenings, but even then, after she dropped Toni off at her dance class, Isadora attended yoga at the gym down the street.
While she’d worried seeing Sawyer one day a week might be difficult, she honestly couldn’t spare much more time for him. Her life was busy, if not with her own obligations. Toni was an energetic kid and that meant plenty of school meetings, countless social calls, after school clubs, and even the occasional sewing for recital costumes and such.
But there was a void. The pace of her life wasn’t dictated by her desires, but the desires of those in her life. Sawyer seemed the only thing in her world that was solely hers and even he was limited.
Lucian had received several college brochures in the mail and they were still piled in the library. Every time she entered that room, a cold and dark area that emanated hints of her father’s time in the house, the brochures taunted her.
Occasionally, she’d page through a few, imagining certain classes and considering signing up for one or two. But it never seemed the right time.
What would a couple classes prove anyway? If she ever wanted to earn an actual degree it would take years. Someone had to be there to pick Toni up from school, take her to her activities, and help her with algebra.
In the end, she tossed the brochures into the trash, preferring not to be taunted in her own home. By the time her schedule opened up the course calendars would all be different anyway. As a consolation, she used her spare time to find less demanding activities that brought her joy—gardening research, crafts, studying foreign cultures—hobbies she could call her own.
The Bishops declined her invitation to join them for Christmas, which was conveyed through Lucian since Mondays were more difficult when the boys were home on winter break. She and her siblings had the unspeakable pleasure of hosting their father and Tibet.
Though their father hadn’t been home in years, he suffered no awkwardness at dominating every square inch of the house. Lucian was outraged to learn that Tibet would be sleeping in what was once their mother and father’s bed, so he stayed with the Callahan’s over winter break.
The few times her brother visited the house a fight erupted, he and their father butting heads until one eventually backed down. It was no surprise the one to usually walk away was Lucian.
Isadora hated the tension that existed between the two of them, finding it sweltering. Lucian had given her a new laptop for Christmas and she wasn’t sure why she needed one. But being that her Monday nights were temporarily free, she found herself toying around with the state-of-the-art device and getting frustrated that she lacked the simplest skills in terms of technology. She did figure out how to manage the word processing program and that seemed just her speed.
Avoiding her father, she spent most of the holiday in her room writing a short story. It was nothing she would ever show anyone, just a silly tale of a girl who wanted to make something of her life and fall in love. The frippery passed the time. In the end, she saved it. But hid the story in a file marked PRIVATE then thought better of it and changed the file name to RECIPES—that seemed less tempting to wandering eyes.
Typing out her fantasies did nothing to make them turn into reality. She missed Sawyer and if her father and Tibet didn’t go back to France soon, she was going to lose her mind.
“I can’t wait for them to leave,” she confessed to Sawyer one evening as they spoke on the phone. “I need to get out of this house. Can’t we go somewhere?” Another drawback to having her father around was that it made Sawyer reluctant to see her.
“People will talk, bella, and we don’t want anything getting back to Christos. Imagine how unpleasant his stay would be then. How long is he in town?”
“I didn’t ask. I don’t know my place when he’s here. He tells Lucian how to think and Toni how to dress. The servants are quiet and everyone’s tense.”
“ You should get out.”
“I could come there,” she offered, desperate for an escape.
His voice held regret. “Slade’s home. He’s in and out so often I never know what his schedule is.”
“Oh.”
“Why don’t you go out with your brother? Have a drink and blow off some steam.”
“Lucian shouldn’t be anywhere they’re serving alcohol.”
“But you know he is, bella. Don’t carry responsibilities that aren’t yours. Just go have some fun. Be young for once.”
She frowned, not sure if she knew how to do that. “I—”
“Hold on, Slade’s coming down the steps.” The phone muffled and she recognized Slade’s voice in the background. “How long will you be?” Sawyer asked.
Slade’s answer was garbled. As she waited, hope flickered. Maybe Slade would go out for the night and she could sneak over to Sawyer’s—
Sawyer’s voice interrupted her train of thought. “An associate. I’ll see you later tonight.” The phone shifted. “Sorry about that.”
“Am I the associate?” she teased.
He chuckled. “Yes, I believe I’ll call you Susan .”
Her humor turned hollow, the joke not as funny as it should have been—something lost in the irony of another woman’s name.
Why was it okay to have a Susan but not an Isadora ? She knew the answer, of course. His association with her father and the friendship between Lucian and his son complicated things. It wasn’t just Sawyer who worried about their families judging them and interfering. She had concerns as well. Then there was the issue of their age difference, which might scandalize members of polite society. Whatever would they do!
Her phone beeped. “Now it’s my call waiting. Can I put you on hold?”
“Sure.”
She flipped to the other line. “Hello?”
“Isa, I’m going out tonight. You should come.”
She hesitated, surprised by her brother’s invitation and his coincidental timing. “Where are you going?”
Lucian was leaving in a day or two and this might be the last chance she had to see him before spring. She’d hardly spent any time with him since their father’s arrival.
“A little jazz bar in Folsom. It’s a quieter crowd. Good people. You’d like it.”
Rather than lecture him on the wrongs of drinking underage, she thought of Sawyer’s advice about acting her age. “When are you leaving?”
“I can pick you up in an hour. You in?”
She smiled, the idea becoming more appealing to her the deeper it sank in. “Okay.”
“Great.” He sounded surprised, but pleased. “I’ll see you in a little bit.”
She flipped back to Sawyer. “Apparently I’m going to try my hand at that twenty-three thing. That was Lucian. He’s taking me to a jazz bar.” When he didn’t respond she checked to make sure she hadn’t lost him. “Sawyer?”
“I’m here… Good. That’s goo
d.”
For as much as he encouraged her to get out and do things people in their twenties did, he didn’t seem as thrilled when she actually took his advice.
“I’m sure we won’t do anything crazy. Lucian said it would be a quiet atmosphere. Is Slade meeting him, do you know?”
“No, Slade has a date.”
“Oh.”
Maybe Shamus would be there. She didn’t like imagining her brother drifting off to talk with some young woman at a private table and leaving her stranded at the bar alone. She wanted to go out, but not without a wingman.
“You’ll enjoy yourself, bella.” His words were encouraging, but his voice held reservations. He didn’t sound like his usual self.
It had been five weeks since they’d started sleeping together on a regular basis and sometimes he’d dropped hints about her possibly meeting other people—male people. But she believed he was growing used to her and part of him would be disappointed if she met someone more … permanent.
Lacking the energy to decipher his feelings at the moment, she focused on her first priority—getting out of her house.
“I better get going.”
They made their goodbyes and she avoided her father and Tibet as she made her way up the stairs to change.
As she waited for Lucian, she entertained the idea of confiding in her brother, asking his opinion of Sawyer, but in the end she decided to keep her promise and keep their relationship a secret.
Lucian might have helpful advice, but he might also find the whole thing disturbing. She wasn’t prepared to face that sort of judgment or chance what she and Sawyer had. Right now, this was enough.
Chapter Eight
“A lonesome dove soars alone.”
~Claudette Dubois
The ride to the city was smooth and luxurious in her brother’s new Mercedes Maybach, but the closer they drew to the metropolitan area the more Isadora’s nerves jangled. Her mind continued to deconstruct Sawyer’s subtle hints that she not hold back where her social life was concerned.
She needed a distraction. “How are you paying for this car?”
Sacrifice of the Pawn: Spin-Off of the Surrender Trilogy (Surrender Games Book 1) Page 10