by Solveig Yrsa
***
The car ride to Jensen’s was quiet, except for the sniffling and sobbing coming from Samantha’s passenger seat. She looked at her petite friend and her heart broke. What had happened? She reached over, grabbing Layla’s hand and gave it a squeeze. She parked her car in the garage and the two walked to the elevator. Samantha sent Liam a text saying they were coming up. Strange, if Layla and Spence are fighting, I cannot believe that my phone isn’t being blown up.
“Lay, do you have your phone?” The brunette shook her head as they walked out of the elevator and were met by Liam and Jensen.
“Oh my god, what did he do?” Liam growled as he hugged the sobbing Layla.
Samantha shrugged. “I just got to the house and she was outside crying, I didn’t even see Spencer.”
Once inside, Liam sat Layla on the couch while Jensen got her a glass of water and a cool rag to wipe off her face. Layla rested her head against Samantha’s shoulder as she tried to calm down.
“Layla, please,” Samantha rubbed the girl’s back. “Tell us what happened.” Layla sat up and took the glass and rag from Jensen, taking a sip of the water before explaining the events.
By the end of it, all three were fuming.
“I’m going to have to kill him,” Samantha growled as she stood up.
Layla grabbed her friend’s hand. “Sammy, please, I just… stay here.”
Samantha sat back on the couch and held Layla to her chest. “It will be okay, Lay, we will figure this out, I promise.” Though, Samantha had no idea how, she was leaving in a matter of days, Spencer had gone off the deep end and she was going to have to leave Layla here. She looked from the girl to the two men sitting on the couch across from her.
“Alright, someone video call Aunt Cat.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Spencer groaned and rubbed his head as the light peaked in through the curtains of the bar room. “What the hell happened?” he muttered, sitting up and trying to let his eyes adjust the best they could without his glasses. He looked around and found the eyewear on the floor, groaning when he put them on and noticed that one lens was cracked. “Great, something else I need to do. What the fuck…” Spencer stood up and looked around at the destroyed room. Chairs were thrown and broken, holes littered the walls, he looked at the glass bar shelf and saw it was destroyed, and the contents of the now shattered bottles lay in puddles on the floor. “Oh my god, Bryson is going to end me,” he whispered as he stumbled out of the room. First thing he needed to do was put his contacts in and then check on Layla. “Hopefully she slept through that shit.” He passed by her closed door as he made his way to his bathroom. How was he going to explain himself to her? He knew how she felt about his drinking, and the fact that he got so black out drunk that he doesn’t remember destroying his brother’s room… He sighed as he ran cool water over his face after brushing his teeth. “She’s going to think so bad of me, I can’t blame her though, I’m pretty embarrassed of myself too.”
Spencer got dressed in a pair of blue jeans and an old blue shirt, he figured there was no need to get too dressed up considering he would be cleaning for the foreseeable future. He could have the maids do it, and a year ago that is exactly what he would’ve done. But he knew Layla would refuse to let him tell others to clean up his mess. He sighed and knocked on her door before slowly opening it. “Hey, Lay, are you up?”
Spencer looked around the empty room. Her bed was made and her pajamas were still clean and folded on her bed. He looked at the floor and saw her sketch-pad and pencils still on the rug. He remembered, before going to drink, peeking in and seeing her on the rug, drawing. “Where is she?” he muttered.
“Not here.”
Spencer jumped and spun around to face his very, very angry looking cousin. “Hey Sam, what’s up?” he asked cautiously.
Before he could blink, the auburn-haired girl lunged at him and took him to the ground. They tussled for a moment before Sam pinned him under her. Her long legs wrapped around his neck while she held the other arm in a lock.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?” she yelled at the choking man, who was smacking her leg to ‘tap out’.
Samantha released him and stood up, glaring at her gasping cousin. “What the fuck, Sam?” he coughed as he stood up.
“That is what I want to know!” she yelled and shoved his chest. Sam was the only one other that Jensen that could square off with Spencer and actually win a fight. “You want to fight? Here I am. But how dare you do that to Layla!”
Spencer’s defensive demeanor disappeared and he looked at his cousin. “W…what? What are you talking about?” Samantha stared at him for a moment before rolling her hazel eyes.
“You’re a fucking idiot. You got shit-faced, and destroyed the lounge all while screaming at Layla, THROWING a chair at her, and you apparently punched a hole in the wall by her face, and then screamed at her to get out.”
Spencer collapsed on Layla’s bed, his eyes wide and his mouth opened in shock. “I…I don’t remember any of that,” he breathed.
Samantha crossed her arms over her chest. “Yeah, my dad used to use that same excuse.”
Spencer snapped his gaze back to his cousin. “I am nothing like David, so don’t even say that.”
“Oh, you are well on your way. Kindest man in the world sober, get a drop of booze in him and he would make the devil blush. You know you have an anger problem and you know booze makes it worse. We all just let it go because hey, we get it, you got shit going on. But no more, Spencer. I spent my whole life making excuses for an abusive drunk. I am not doing it again, especially when you’re hurting Layla of all people.”
“Look, it’s not an excuse, alright, I really do not remember.”
“That is an excuse. No one cares if you remember, Layla remembers, she ran out of the house last night shaking and begging me to take her somewhere safe, Spencer! You fucked up, and you fucked up big. And everyone knows it now.”
Spencer looked at her and raised a brow. “Who…who is everyone?”
“I took Layla to Jensen’s. So he and Liam know, I know, oh, and I called your mother and Layla couldn’t hold it together during the video call, so guess who is on the jet headed back here?”
Spencer ran his hands through his hair. “Okay, okay, I can fix this. I…I gotta go see Layla.” Spencer brushed past his cousin and ran down the stairs and out the door. He could fix it, he would apologize to Layla and everything would be fine.
***
Jensen handed the small girl a mug before sitting on the couch next to her. “If you are refusing to go to sleep, at least drink some coffee,” he said while rubbing her back. Her hair was a mess, her eyes were bloodshot with dark rings underneath them, and her cheeks were puffy and irritated from the constant wiping of tears.
Layla looked at the hot beverage and took a sip before jumping at hearing Jensen’s phone vibrate on the coffee table in front of her. She looked at the screen and saw Spencer’s face and she suddenly couldn’t breathe.
“I…I can’t. Jensen… please.”
Jensen sighed put the phone in his pocket. “Lay, you know he’s going to come here. I’m sure Sam has already seen him, and that’s why he’s texting me.”
“Yeah, and hopefully she beat his ass,” muttered Liam as he sat on the chair across from Layla and Jensen.
Layla gave a small chuckle and shook her head. “I…I don’t want to see him. I’m too confused right now. I hate having to put you in this spot, guys.”
Jensen waved his hand to silence her. “You helped Liam and I, it’s the least I can do.”
Jensen sighed as he heard the rapid knocking on the door. “Here we go,” he muttered as he motioned for Liam to take Layla. Once they were in the back room, Jensen opened the door halfway as Spencer all but fell in.
“Jensen, please… I need to talk to her,” Spencer panted as he tried to push his way in.
Jensen shook his head and placed a hand on his friend’s chest. “Spence, stop f
or a second and breathe. You’re in a panic. Did you run up the stairs instead of taking the elevator?”
Spencer took a step back and tried to take a breath. “The elevator seemed too slow, so I ran up the twenty floors.”
Jensen shook his head but continued, “Spence, Layla does not want to see you, and I know that’s not what you want to hear, but you have to respect her wishes right now.”
Spencer shook his head. “No,” he whispered looking at Jensen. “Please, you don’t understand I have to. Please, Jen, you are my best friend, please don’t do this to me.” Jensen sighed and ran his hands through his hair.
“Spence, I am your best friend, which is why I have to do this. I am also Layla’s friend and she needs to feel safe right now, I cannot allow you in here if she’s not ready. Give her space.”
Spencer crouched down to the floor and gripped his hair. He couldn’t think straight. “Jen, I…I don’t know what happened, did I…”
“Physically, you didn’t hurt her. You apparently came close a couple of times, but you didn’t touch her.”
Spencer shook his head. “I thought hearing that would make me feel better, but I still hate myself.” He stood up and looked at his friend who blocked his entrance. “Tell her I’m…” Spencer let out a shaky breath, he felt his eyes burning, but he refused to let the tears spill. He cleared his throat and looked Jensen dead in the eyes. “Tell her, when she’s ready…” And with that, Spencer turned around and headed down the hallway towards the elevator.
Jensen shut the door and turned to see Layla standing there in the hallway with her head hung low. “Thank you,” she whispered before turning around and heading back into the back room.
***
Spencer sighed as he heaved the last of the trash bags out to the bins. He walked back into his brother’s now bare lounge and rubbed the back of his neck. “This is going to financially cripple me,” he muttered, looking at the back of the bar where all his brother’s prized liquor once was displayed.
It had been three days since Layla left, and Spencer was doing his best to give her the space that she required. Since Samantha took Layla’s phone to her after his beating, Spencer made sure to send Layla a text every morning and at night, and had pretty much turned Jensen’s home into a florist shop at this point, but other than that, complete space. Spencer was torn from his thoughts when he heard someone walking into the room. He sighed when he saw his mother. Catherine had returned two days earlier and after spending four hours screaming at him, she left to be with Layla, and Spencer hadn’t heard from her since.
“Looks better,” Catherine said, breaking the silence. “Your brother said he would be sending you a detailed inventory of his liquor shortly.”
Spencer rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I figured he would be on it, I’m honestly shocked I haven’t gotten a call yet from him screaming at me.”
“You will, don’t worry. I told him to hold off until I was done with you.”
Spencer nodded and sat on the couch. “Okay, so you’re back for round two. Understood.”
“Do not get smart with me, Spencer Matthew, I am not in the mood.”
Spencer held his hands up in defense. “Mom, I’m not being smart, I deserve far worse than whatever you’re about to throw at me.”
Catherine sat down across from her son and looked at his broken expression. She was so heartbroken, so angry and so completely confused. But above all, she was disappointed. Not so much in Spencer, but in herself as a mother. She hadn’t seen the signs, she hadn’t seen how bad her son was getting, how much stress he was really under. She felt that she was partially to blame for the events.
***
Catherine brushed John off as she walked up the stairs to her house. Her body was exhausted and it took every ounce of strength she had to get up those steps, but she did it. She walked through her doorway and went straight for her son’s lounge; she hated that bloody lounge. It had caused nothing but trouble since she allowed Bryson to build it nearly six years ago. When she walked into the room, she nearly collapsed in shock. Everything was destroyed. She traced the holes in the wall with her shaky hands. Her baby could not have done this. Not Spencer.
“Mom?” Catherine spun around and looked at her son. He looked so defeated, his eyes were bloodshot, she could see the red splotches on his face, indicating he had been crying.
“Spencer, what…what happened?” she breathed as she placed a hand to her mouth.
“Mom, I really screwed up,” Spencer choked as he tried to hold in the tears. Catherine shook her head and waved her hands. She had to get out of this room. She walked past Spencer and headed into the living room.
“Mom, please, don’t leave me too.”
Catherine spun around and looked at her son. “Son, I love you, I would give my life for you, but I am not going to sugar coat this. You did screw up. Layla did not leave you, you pushed her away. How could you let it get this bad? How could you not tell someone you were doing so poorly?”
“Who could I tell? My absent father, my fragile girlfriend, my overworked cousin, or my dying mother? Because to me, I feel as though I have no one to tell that it’s getting bad. That I’m drowning in the stress and the sadness and I see no way out, and then the one shimmer of light I had, Layla, she got so bad the other day, and wouldn’t talk about it. I don’t have anyone to care about me, Mom, because my job is to care for everyone else.”
“Are you done with the martyr speech? Look, I understand that you don’t have an easy go. You have a lot on you and I am sorry for that. But that does not excuse what you did. She did not deserve that. And I did not deserve to see her that broken over the phone. Now you get this room cleaned up, I am going to change, and then I am going over to Jensen’s where I will be staying with Layla to help her make arrangements.”
“Arrangements? What does that mean?”
“I’m setting her up with an apartment. It’s not what I want, I love having her in my home but, I won’t make her come back to a place she doesn’t feel safe.”
Spencer fell back on the couch. “Mom, she can’t leave me, not like this, you have to get her to talk to me.”
Catherine waved her hand. “No, Spencer, you need to straighten the hell up, and then maybe if you’re lucky, she will hear you out. But I will not tell her to do anything.”
***
“Why?” Was all Catherine managed to get out after several quiet moments.
Spencer let out a short laugh before fighting back the tears. “Because I’m weak, because I’m stupid. I don’t know, Mom. I hate myself for what I did. I thought maybe, I would have the answers or feel better once I remembered. But I feel worse. She was just… she was being her sweet self and I… I destroyed her like everyone else in her life has. I wish I couldn’t remember because all I can see when I close my eyes is that look of fear on her face, and that will forever haunt me. I don’t know how to fix this, Mom. She doesn’t want to see me. She won’t even read the messages I send. I have no idea how she is, what she’s doing, no one will tell me anything, and it’s killing me.”
Catherine let out a breath, she didn’t know how to tell him what she had to, but it had to be done. “She’s going to London.”
Spencer snapped his head up and looked at his mother. “She… What?”
“Your father called her and Samantha last night. He originally thought it would be a good idea if Layla came with Samantha but due to your new relationship, that obviously wasn’t in the cards. But after what has happened, he called and talked to the girls and offered Layla the position again with Samantha for the next year. Layla accepted the offer and will be leaving tomorrow night to head to London with Samantha.”
“You…you shipped my girlfriend across the fucking world?” Spencer rubbed his chest, he felt like the room was spinning.
“I did not ship her off, Spencer. Your father offered her a position and she took it, it was her choice.”
Spencer shook his head. “I know Layla, she wou
ldn’t just do this without talking to me first.”
Catherine stood up. “You broke her heart, Spencer!' I told you, she is different from your other girlfriends. You cannot send her flowers and expect her to move on. You hurt her, she is not going to come back that easy. She wanted this job. She is an adult and made that decision. Maybe, you two need the distance.”
Spencer stood up and glared at his mom, he felt so much rage and betrayal, how could she do that to him? “Maybe you all need to mind your own business and stop treating me like a god damn child.”
Catherine popped up and looked her son in the eyes. “Maybe when you stop turning to booze and violence to solve your issues, I will mind my own business. I am dying, Spencer, and I can’t even do that in peace because I have a son who is miserable in China dealing with an overbearing father, a husband who is banging everything in a skirt, oh yes, I know all about his whores, and then I have you who refuses to find any healthy coping mechanisms and has turned to destroying the only good thing he had going for him. Spencer, you are my son and I love you, but you are destroying yourself, and you are destroying a girl who cares for you so deeply.”
Spencer looked around at the walls and then back at his mother. “Mom, I think I’m in love her,” he whispered as a tear spilled down his face.
Catherine placed a hand on his cheek. “I know you do, but you don’t love yourself, Spencer, and until then, you need to let her go.”
Spencer shook his head, how was he supposed to let her go? He just got her, and already he destroyed what they had.
***
Layla looked at her phone and shook her head. Spencer had sent a good morning text, which meant that she should expect her morning floral arrangement any minute. It was all so wasteful, but she wouldn’t tell him to stop, she wouldn’t tell him anything. Mainly because, she was afraid that if she started talking to him, she’d forgive him, and go back. She couldn’t do that. Even if she wanted to, and God she wanted to, she had to stay strong, for him. He to take care of himself and he wouldn’t do that with her there. She was a project, his mother was a project, his book was a project. No not projects, distractions; distractions that kept him from dealing with what was going on inside of him. She wanted to talk to him about London; she was terrified and honestly, the thought of going had made her physically ill, but Sam, Catherine, and Matthew all agreed it would be for the best, to not only help Spencer, but to help her.