I kept my distance from him giving him a serious side eye, trying to see through his response.
"The truth is," he continued. "I'm attracted to you, Blair. How could you not know? I have been for ages. You’re fucking gorgeous. And seeing you again..." His voice drifted off as he looked out over the city.
"What," I said.
"Seeing you again made me remember.... and here you’re. Even more goddamn beautiful that I remembered. I thought maybe you felt the same way. I thought I would take a shot."
I had to admit his words moved me just a little… only a little.
"Oh," I said. "I see."
He took a small step towards me reaching for my hand. In that fleeting moment I knew I had a choice. I could relax and let him take it, maybe tilt my head forward as he might lean in for another kiss. I could see where this went, letting the fates decide how our future might unfold.
But then my mind's drive took over slamming shut the steel door of opportunity.
I didn’t come here for a chance at the job of a lifetime, only to be distracted by a pretty face. I stiffened my posture and raised my hands to stop him.
"I don't feel the same way."
With those words I saw the laughter and camaraderie drain from his face. The light in his eyes dimmed and he stepped back casting his gaze to the ground.
"Fair enough,” he said, rubbing his left arm.
"I guess we should go home,” I said, turning towards the parking lot.
"Guess so," he said.
As we walked back I wanted nothing more than to find that lightness again, that easy friendship that had proven to be so fragile. Maybe if I punched him lightly on the arm and offered him Monopoly and chocolate cookies we could find that again.
I doubted it.
We continued on in silence until we arrived at our vehicles. Our cars were the only two left in the lot, framed in the circular light of the lamp posts. He walked over to his car without even saying goodbye.
I felt badly for ending things in such a way after having had such a fun evening. I never wanted to hurt him either, but I had to make him believe that I didn’t have any feelings for him. This was as much for his good as for mine. For the briefest of moments I wondered who I was trying to convince, him or me.
"Aiden," I called after him over the top of my car. He turned with his hand on the handle of his door. "For what it's worth, I had a good time tonight. I'll see you tomorrow at work?"
"Yeah," he said, but the pain still reflected in his eyes.
He pulled his door open and vanished without another word.
The drive home left me feeling perplexed and angry. I wanted this job more than I had wanted anything before in my life, but I couldn’t deny even to myself that I had feelings for him.
Perhaps, I thought, these are just remnants of a childhood crush.
That's all.
There is nothing to analyze here. Of course I reacted the way I had when he kissed me. It would have been the same if I had met an old movie star that I admired or something like that.
What girl hasn't fantasized about an unexpected kiss from an attractive friend?
It was just a kiss after all, I said to myself. Tomorrow we will have forgotten the whole thing and be focused on the case. Other than that there is nothing else to worry about.
But the look the he had given me before he had opened his car door told me otherwise. He had looked like a wounded animal, and I shared that pain. Largely because I was responsible for causing it.
I arrived home to find Kelsey sitting on the couch going over some lines, with her feet tucked under her knees and a cup of tea on the table.
I was glad to see her.
I wanted to share my internal conflict with her and see what advice she might have. She closed her script book, laying it aside as I stepped into the apartment and leaned my head against the door.
"What am I going to do?!" I lamented before even saying hello.
"It's nice to see you too, Blair," she said. "How was your day?"
I rolled my eyes.
"I have a big, big problem,” I exclaimed.
"Have a seat," she gestured. "I'll make you some tea."
She stood and headed to the kitchen.
I opted to change clothes first, shedding my work clothes into a pile on the floor and pulling on my comfy cotton night gown. I emerged from my room, having shed some of the stresses of the day with my change of clothes, just as she finished in the kitchen. We headed to the living room and she handed me the cup of tea that relaxed my senses immediately.
"So what's going on?" she asked.
"Do you remember Aiden, from high school?" I asked.
"The skinny kid?" she asked.
"Yeah. He and I used to run around together all the time."
"Aiden Player!" she exclaimed recalling his name. "Of course!"
"He's my partner at the firm,” I said. "And my competition for the full time position."
"You’re kidding me!" She pulled herself up fully on to her knees clutching her teacup in both hands. "Didn't you guys used to date?"
"No, we never dated,” I clarified. "We were just really good friends. Most people thought we were dating though."
"I always thought you guys dated. Anyway, did something happen?"
I took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of my herb tea and letting myself relax.
"Well for one thing," I began. "He's completely hot now. He grew up a little, that's for sure. But what is most unsettling I think is that he is really good at his job. We've worked together for two days so far and he has a knack for finding details in the evidence that the rest of us might miss."
"Oh whatever, get to the good part,” she said glancing at the clock. "I know you haven't been at the office working on the case until this late at night. What happened?"
"We went out for dinner after,” I said. "It had been a long day, so whatever. No big deal really. "
"What was it like to see him again?" she asked.
"It was great at first,” I said. "That's what so confusing. Here is this old friend of mine, and I'm in this new city and I don't know anyone other than you. Of course I'm going to feel drawn to him, right?"
"It only makes sense," she said. "I mean you guys were pretty close back in the day."
"Yeah, we were,” I said, setting my cup down on the table. "But this doesn’t change anything. I'm still going after this job. I can't not go after it. Just because he's an old friend doesn't change the fact that this is the best opportunity I've ever had. I have to take him down."
"I feel as if you aren’t telling me everything,” she said.
I glanced in her direction and saw her inquisitive eyes boring into me.
"Okay fine," I said. "After dinner, we were walking back to the parking lot. Kind of taking the long way. The weather was nice, the city lights. We had just had this wonderful night out together, and he kissed me."
"No way!" she gushed. "What was it like? Did you kiss him back?"
"Of course not!" I insisted. "Maybe a little. I don't know!"
"What are you going to do?" she asked.
"I don't know,” I said. "I mean I'm not going to do anything to jeopardize the job, that's for sure. Besides I don't have feelings for him. I mean it's nice to see him, sure. But I don't feel that way about him." I looked over to see Kelsey giving me a significant look. "I don't!" I insisted.
"I don't buy it,” she said. "It's all over your face. This is more than just a reconnection with an old friend. Besides you didn't really answer my question. Did you kiss him back?"
"Oh god," I said, burying my face in my hands. "I think I did."
"I knew it," she said.
"What should I do?" I said.
"Well," she said, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "On the one hand you have worked way too hard to let anything come between you and that which is rightfully yours. You shouldn't let anything keep you from that, especially a man. Even this man,” she insisted.
/> "Yeah," I said, my eyes drifting down toward my tea.
"On the other hand," she said. "What's the harm in having a little fun?"
"What?" I said at her sudden turn.
"I mean you said yourself that he was hot."
"Did I?" I asked, batting my eyes with affected innocence.
"Yes! As long as you can keep things separate, why should you lose out? I mean you guys have that history. It's almost a perfect match. Why shouldn't you rekindle the friendship because of a job?"
"I don't think it's friendship that he is interested in."
"Or you," she said, giving my shoulder a slight nudge.
"Come on. Don't rub it in,” I said. "What's on television?"
I grabbed the remote and turned on the set, happy to have a mental distraction for a little while, ready to unwind for a few minutes before going to bed.
The next day I headed to work. I had hoped that a good night’s sleep would have brought me closer to an answer on how to proceed, but to no avail. I had awoken just as confused as ever, no closer to figuring out what I wanted to do.
When I stepped into the office a few moments later, I discovered that Aiden had already arrived ahead of me and Mr. Mahoney was beginning to lay out the case files. I greeted them both in a cool, professional tone, and kept up that demeanor as we began our work.
I tried to ignore Aiden, speaking to him only when I had.
We had another full day ahead of us, and I wanted to focus on the details of the case. Finally Mr. Mahoney stepped out for a while, instructing us both that he would return later to view our progress.
"Blair," Aiden said as soon as the door closed behind the senior partner. "Can we talk about last night?"
"No," I answered right away.
"Come on,” he said. "At least let me apologize. I feel bad about misreading things."
"Look," I said in a sharp tone. "You need to forget about what happened last night. I don't want to talk about it. We have a lot of work to do. Let's try and focus. Okay?"
I felt him watching me as I turned my attention back to the files before me.
"Blair," he said. "If we can't talk about it now, why don't we get together later after work."
"No," I said.
The office door opened and Mr. Mahoney returned.
"Sorry to interrupt," he said. "I left my report for the board meeting."
He gathered what he needed and left the office once more. I turned back to my work. Aiden sighed and did the same, giving up on the possibility of reaching me.
I kept my cold front up for the rest of the day and he didn’t press the issue again. Despite the awkwardness, once we got into the work we got a great deal finished. It seemed that our attention towards one another had transferred into a strange competition.
Through our annoyance with each other we spent the day actively trying to outdo the other. By the end of the day we had built a strong case, despite our differences. Our first appearance in court wasn’t for another couple of weeks from then, but I had begun to feel confident in our case. I made an offhand statement that if we had to make our opening statements the next day that I would be ready.
"No kidding," Aiden said. "I feel that way too. A strong opening and a strong closing are going to win this case. We have the first part. I'm starting to dream about the case as much as we have been working."
"I know exactly what you mean,” I said.
“I’ve been dreaming about something else too,” he quipped, leaning back in his chair and placing his hands on the back of his head.
Then, he winked at me.
I rolled my eyes.
A grin spread across his face.
“Well, you’ll just have to keep dreaming about it then,” I told him.
“We’ll see about that.”
Jesus.
I didn’t have time for him to come on to me.
This case was too important.
The following day we arrived to find that we would be heading over to the prison with the partners to meet Mr. Shaw. The partners had said that they would need us to only stay for the first part as they had some preparation to do with the client, but that he was also curious to meet the newest members of his defense team. We would be returning around lunch time, and after our break we could start back into the case as we saw fit.
"Do you want to ride over together?" Aiden asked while the partners gathered their documents.
"I'd like to, but I have to run some errands over the lunch break. I won't be coming straight back here right away."
This statement was patently untrue, but I didn’t want to be in close proximity with Aiden, especially since we were meeting the client. Though I did believe that his invitation didn’t have any ulterior motives, it was my own sense of focus that I didn’t want compromised.
“Well why don’t I run errands with you then?” he asked, moving closer to me.
“They are kind of personal things,” I lied.
“Riiight,” he said, obviously not believing a word I said.
“Yup,” I responded, looking away from his eyes since I knew if I did I would grin he would really know it was all a bunch of lies. “I’ll see you at the prison.”
I quickly moved away from him knowing I would finally give in to his requests to ride together if I didn’t.
The partners gave us directions to the prison where Shaw was in holding until the trial and we headed out.
About twenty minutes later we arrived, having driven in a caravan formation most of the way. The city had given way to a windy two lane road, which came upon a large gated entrance. I had driven past this before but never expected that I would set foot inside. Seeing the imposing entrance made my stomach flip flop.
We all met in the lobby upon the instructions of the partners, leaving our valuables in the car. A guard arrived to escort us to the intake station and we each took our turn walking through the large metal detector. Once on the other side we reconvened.
The officer motioned for us to follow him and we journeyed down a long winding hallway, not unlike the road we had just traveled. When we arrived at the room, he opened the door and let us enter. Darius Shaw already sat at the only table present. I could see his wrists and ankles shackled beneath the surface. He wore the orange jumpsuit typical of an inmate. Despite the circumstances, he smiled when we entered.
"Good morning, Darius.” Mr. Mahoney asked as we all took our seats, "Are you in good spirits?"
"I'm ready to get this over with,” he said. His voice sounded soft and meek, different than I would have expected.
Truth be told I hadn't known what to expect. He glanced in the direction of me and Aiden. Mahoney introduced us.
"Darius," he said. "These are the newest members of your council. Aiden Player and Blair Michaels."
"How do you do, Mr. Player. Miss Michaels,” he nodded towards us, unable to shake our hands.
"Please call me Blair," I insisted despite the look I got from Aiden.
Even if we were to only have minimal contact during the trial, I still wanted this man to feel comfortable with me. He held himself in such a way that reflected an old world charm.
I wanted to respect that.
"What we are going to discuss," Mahoney said, pausing for a brief moment. "Is some of the questions that we believe the prosecution may bring to us. Do you feel prepared to do that?"
"Of course," Darius said.
Mahoney turned towards me and Aiden. "Of course if the two of you have any questions for the client, now is the time to ask. After today you will most likely not see him until the court date. Please feel free to take part."
I could sense next to me Aiden's posture shifting uncomfortably in the hard plastic chairs. I gave him a questioning look, but he avoided my eyes. I felt as if I had hundreds of questions for Mr. Shaw, but I opted to wait and watch, seeing how Mahoney and Ms. Klein handled the information in front of the client.
Mentally I took notes as we went along watching the dem
eanor of the client. He listened intently, his eyes focusing carefully when something was shown to him. He always answered in quiet polite tones, calling everyone 'sir' and 'ma'am'.
By the end of the morning I had a new respect for what we were doing. I had already understood that our job was important, but seeing his face, hearing his voice, made me realize just how important our work would be. This man's life was at stake. I felt more determined than ever to build a solid defense on his behalf.
That’s exactly why I had to stay away from Aiden.
I couldn’t let him break down my barriers.
I needed to concentrate on the case.
Having to tell myself that over and over told me right there he was already in my head.
We finished a few hours later. Shaw was escorted out first, walking in shuffling steps with a guard on either side of him. Watching him try to move with shackles on made me cringe inside. Under any other circumstances I would never have placed him as a suspect.
At last the guards returned to escort us back out to the lobby. Once more we submitted to the metal detectors, stepping through one at a time without incident.
"I guess I'll see you back at the office around one?" Aiden said as we stepped out into the sunlight.
"Oh, right." I had almost forgotten about the story I had told him about running errands. "Yeah, I'll see you then."
"You okay?" he called after me as I headed to my car.
"Yeah," I said. "Why?"
"I don't know. You just seem a little down or something."
I had hoped to keep my emotions under wraps, but meeting Mr. Shaw had affected me more than I cared to admit.
Apparently Aiden noticed after all.
"I'm okay,” I said. "Really. But thanks for asking."
He nodded and I turned my back opening my door and disappearing from his view.
The next couple of weeks flew by, with Aiden and I hard at work. The feedback we received from the partners was largely positive. The day before the case arrived, and we were both ready.
On a personal level, I had stuck to my resolve not to see Aiden after work anymore. He seemed to accept that as he hadn’t made any further moves, and the kiss was no longer mentioned. Though I couldn’t help but feel a small tinge of the memory of our night out in the back of my mind.
Tempted (A Player Brother Romance Book) (A Standalone Novel) (Player Brothers Book 1) Page 5