“Maybe you could get a job as a secretary there, April.”
“Okay! We should go mingle more. I’ll talk to you later, mom.” April grabbed my shoulder and led me around the room. She was tapped on the shoulder and jerked back. “Mrs. Middleton!”
“Hello, sweetie! We are so glad you could make it. It has really been too long. How are things going?”
“They are going well.”
“And how is your writing doing?”
“I’m keeping at it. No bites yet.”
“A rolling stone gathers no moss.” I could tell that Mrs. Middleton already had a few. Maybe April wasn’t the only one who wasn’t too excited about this wedding. “Your writing is so lovely, dear, I’m sure you will get a job. I was so sad when your mom told me that you almost couldn’t make it.”
“Well, here I am!”
“And who might this be?”
“Grant Taylor, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Is this your boyfriend, April.”
“It sure is.” You could tell by the rosiness of April’s cheeks that she was boasting and gloating to Mrs. Middleton. It could have also been the alcohol.
“What a handsome fellow.”
“Thank you, ma’am.”
“You take good care of April. She is sublime. Simply magnificent.”
“Don’t I know it.” April looked in my eyes and we traded a glance. She was stunning. The whole world could see it besides her.
“Tell me more about your life, dear. How are things after the accident? Did you heal properly? Do you need help?”
“I’m doing fine now, thanks.” They continued talking like that for a while, catching up. I decided to excuse myself and get a drink of my own. It would be a long night for me, and I was going to enjoy it the best way I knew how.
When I joined them again Mrs. Middleton had to go talk to another family that just arrived. She gave me a hug goodbye and whispered about what a great woman April was in my ear. It was clear to me that Mrs. Middleton was nicer to April than her mother was. Perhaps that was where April’s self confidence had gone. April snagged another drink and we went to a secluded table.
With my strict diet it didn’t take much to get me tipsy. At this point I was fine, but another glass and I knew that I would be a little bit more cheerful and a little bit warmer. I felt like dancing with April, but I knew that this was neither the place nor the time.
There was a tinge of jealousy in my heart for her. I wished she weren’t still going after this Tom guy. I knew it was hopeless, and so did she. I just didn’t want her to have any feelings for him. It was crazy and stupid, especially since I was used to being the other man. Something about April just made me want to keep her safe.
12
April
I need to take socializing lessons from Grant. He has mingled his way through my friends and family like no one I have seen before. He was able to successfully tame and slay the dragon that is my mother. I have never seen anyone accomplish that before, not even Tom. Not even my dad. I hoped that Mrs. Middleton wasn’t upset by him being here. I wanted her to like him. I at least wanted to feel like he was welcomed. I certainly wanted him there. I wouldn’t be paying him if I didn’t.
Something about Grant gave me confidence. Maybe it was being seen with him, and maybe it was just the way he treated me. He had been a perfect gentleman all night, and the way he looked at me made me actually feel beautiful. All my cares and worries were disappearing.
That is, until I saw Tom. He was standing next to his fiancée laughing loudly at the front. I needed another drink. I got up to get one, but Grant insisted he grab them.
“I don’t want a martini.”
“That’s okay. We can have armeretto sours. You’ll love these.”
He left to grab the drinks before I could ask how many calories were in them. When he got back I was able to finish it in a matter of seconds. It tasted like juice. We got another, and I could tell that they were starting to hit me. I kept staring at Tom, seeing him socialize with all these faces from my past. This was supposed to be me. This was going to be my wedding exactly. It was strange to see it in the position I was. It was almost like hovering over your body after you died. Tom would laugh and his soon-to-be-wife would giggle and they were having the happiest time being the two dumbest people here. Stupid happy. Stupid in love. Stupid life ruiners. “You see that turd in the suit up there? That’s Tom.”
“The one with the woman with the legs?”
“That one exactly.”
“Okay.” Grant stood up and started leaving.
“Wait!” I stage whispered. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to go get him.”
“No, are you kidding? I haven’t talked to him in two years. I never want to talk to him again if I don’t have to.”
“Come on. You have to say something. He has to see the way you look tonight.”
“It isn’t worth it. I would rather die than be seen as I am now.”
“I have never seen anyone as beautiful as you.” When he said it that time I knew he meant it and I could feel myself falling harder. I was developing a crush on an escort. Was this an exciting new high in my life or a drastic new low? Grant slipped out of my grasp and went to go speak with him. I followed but grabbed a drink on the way.
“April.” Tom sees me before I can stop Grant from saying anything. “You look… Great.” I saw his fiancée eye me up and down. She linked arms with him.
“Doesn’t she? I helped her pick out this dress tonight.” Grant said, holding out his hand to shake. “I’m Grant Taylor.”
“Oh, how do you two know each other… actually how do I know you?” Tom said, shaking the hand back. He had that dumb confused look on his face that he got when solving computer problems.
“You don’t, actually. I came with April. I’m her date.” I saw Tom’s expression change. He kept his eyes fixed on me. “This is a lovely hotel, simply wonderful. If I ever get married, I will have to keep this place in mind.” Grant turned to look at me. “Don’t let me forget the name of this place, okay, honey?”
“Okay.” That was all I could manage to gasp out. Tom looked great. It stung me a lot to see him. Part of my heart wasn’t ready for this. When I saw his face I could feel the rush of feelings coming back through me.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Tom stopped shaking hands. His eyes darted back and forth between the two of us. I could sense him spacing out, he was stuck in his own head now.
“And you must be the bride.” Grant held his hand out to Legs and kissed her gently. “You look lovely this evening. Congrats to the both of you.”
Tom began to get fidgety, his vein popping on his forehead. He was definitely jealous. “Grant, do you mind if I steal April for just a bit? Please, help yourself to some refreshments.”
“Not at all.” Grant kissed me on the forehead and went to the bar. I could tell my mouth was still agape. I shut it and tried to summon words to say. I wanted to yell at him for leaving me. I wanted to grab his face and kiss him hard on the mouth. I wanted to know why. I wanted to know what I did to make him not love me anymore.
“April, I have to say, you look absolutely wonderful. I almost didn’t recognize you.”
“Thanks.”
“I’ll go ahead and talk to my mom for a bit. I’ll come back.” Legs said, backing away awkwardly.
“So, Grant is your guy now?”
“He sure is.”
“Where did you find him? He is certainly a charming fellow.”
“Enchanting, isn’t he?” I looked over at the bar. He was making small talk with the bartender, who was laughing hysterically at his jokes. I looked back at Tom. Boring old mean Tom. “We met at a bar. He said he couldn’t stand not seeing me again. Now it’s been two months.”
Tom fidgeted and I could tell he was feeling just as awkward seeing me as I was seeing him. He was bothered by Grant, but couldn’t say anything. Tom left first. I was nev
er going to leave. This was all on him. “You know, I have to say, it is crazy seeing you. I almost thought you weren’t going to come tonight.”
“I almost didn’t.”
“Well, I’m glad you did. You certainly are doing well for yourself.”
“I could say the same for you.” I pointed at Legs. Tom glanced over too.
“Yeah, she’s a great girl.”
“Your mom seems like she is doing well. I missed her a lot.”
“Yeah, she asks about you all the time.”
“I bet that gets old. My mom does the same for you.” He snickered. “My mom is actually the only reason I am here, to tell you the truth. I really didn’t want to see you.” The honesty was coming out, and I could feel the alcohol resting in my stomach in an uneasy way. Maybe it was the nerves. Maybe it was butterflies.
“No one can really blame you.”
I was happy. Thrilled. I was so mad at Tom, but seeing him now, I’m not sure he was worth all the anger. I looked good. I was turning heads, I could tell. Maybe I wasn’t as fat as I thought I was. Maybe I was worth more than Tom. I was worthy of being loved. Now I could see Tom was jealous and he didn’t feel comfortable either. Me making him miserable the night before his wedding just by being there was all the boost that I needed to feel like me again. I realized we split for a good reason, whether it was cosmic fate or just restless uncertainty. I wasn’t over Tom, but I was going to be.
It grew silent and I finished my drink. “You look like you’re doing well, Tom.”
“Thanks. You honestly look so great tonight, April.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
“I’m serious.”
I smiled at him and tapped my empty glass. “Well, this thing isn’t going to fill itself.” I walked away slowly towards the bar. Grant watched me step closer and patted the seat next to him. I leaned in and whispered to him “Was he watching me leave?”
“Every step of the way. Bartender!” He shouted, playfully. “Let’s get this thirsty woman some heartbreak elixir.
“It felt really shitty to see him again. There were a lot of mixed emotions.”
“You’re in luck. I have mixed drinks for mixed emotions.” Grant joked and ordered my next drink. I swayed with the jazz music. I was fairly tipsy but I was still in my right mind. I was glad that I told Tom the truth. I was happy that he was jealous. I wanted to hurt him back for hurting me. The best thing about hurting him this way was that I wasn’t doing a single thing wrong.
It felt nice to be complimented by so many people. I felt a lot less hopeless than I had a week ago. This new April kick was certainly off to a great start. I was even enjoying my time with Grant. He won over my parents and even Tom’s parents. He even made me feel pretty when I wasn’t halfway down to my goal weight. Grant was being a really good friend and I could tell why Alex was so close to him. I wanted to know more about his day by day life. I wondered if he really had a hedge fund. It didn’t seem likely if he was an escort. And if he did, why was he an escort? There were much better ways for him to make money, or at least he didn’t really have to make money.
Something about his carefree Las Vegas lifestyle really appealed to me. I wanted to be able to run away, have it so my parents stopped shaming me. I wanted to live too.
13
April
This night went so much better than expected. I couldn’t imagine I had summoned enough courage to talk to Tom, and even more surprised that I told him off. I wasn’t the same woman anymore. I felt a bit carefree, like I was in control of my own destiny. I looked out from the windows. The night painted an illuminous portrait of the moon. The water looked like diamonds sparkling in waves, reflecting the stars and basking in the glow of the moon. So much of me wanted to jump in that ocean. Half of me wanted to confess about the lie, and the other half didn’t care if I got caught. One thing was for sure, I was going to let that cool water soak into my skin before I went back to reality.
Grant sipped his last drink of the night. I had passed on having another, I was already past the point I thought I would get to. The ice clinked on the edge of his glass as he put his pink lips on the edge. My stomach felt warm, and I didn’t regret a single moment of the night. Part of me was glad I was forced to come. So much of the reservation was a fear or rejection, of being rejected again. As I looked at Grant I already reminisced about the great night we had had.
Jazz music was playing softly in the background and I swayed to it slowly. I wanted to dance. I felt like dancing. I knew I could. I could just take Grant’s hand, head to the dimly lit floor and sway with him, his strong hands on my hips and his torso pressed against mine. I could smell his cologne from where I was sitting. I imagined how amazing it would smell even closer. I wanted to dance. I wanted to swim. I wanted to feel alive. I did feel alive. I wanted this feeling to last for the rest of my life, if not just the rest of this night.
“What a fantastic song.” Grant said, swaying slightly with me. He put his arm around my shoulders, matching my rhythm, swaying to the bass’ metronome. With the alcohol and romance in the air, I felt light, like I could float up through the ceiling. I no longer felt weighted by my pound gains or my car wreck. I didn’t mind Tom, although he was staring and doing an awful job at making it subtle. I didn’t feel so burdened by my debt and loans to pay off. I wasn’t thinking about starting a career. I was only thinking about how wonderful the saxophone paired with the piano and bass, playing in harmony.
“It really is.”
“They should play this at our wedding.” Grant teased. I lightly slapped his leg and smiled. I knew he was kidding. He was either making an excellent performance, or he was toying with my emotions. He could give Meryl Streep a run for her money.
I saw my mom staring, too. She sat on the other side of the room, having to act as an invisible podium for my tipsy father and Mr. Middleton’s hottest debate topic of the night. She looked unhappy. The look on her face was almost enough of an excuse to her horrible remarks at me. Almost. I could forgive her, but the emotional damage that had once pierced my soul created more problems that hadn’t had to have been there. Was this dull life of hers the root of her bitter attitude?
Being able to look at her and see her that sad helped me learn to be less angry with her. I think in the future I could see where she was coming from and understand the situation better. Now I knew why she had so much hatred for Ms. Middleton. She found her to be competition. She was probably relieved when our wedding was called off, since she wouldn’t have to try to get us to like her better than my other mother-in-law. My mom was very sad. I didn’t like thinking about her this way, but I saw it in her eyes. At the same time, she does it to herself. This is a vicious spiral that she keeps herself in. I wasn’t going to be like that anymore.
Grant ordered a glass of champagne and I turned my head to look at him. “I just wanted to enjoy this perfect moment with the perfect drink.” The bartender brought over a fine crystal glass, and I ordered a second one. I could probably handle just one more drink. “A toast to a lovely couple.” He remarked, clinking his glass next to my glass.
I took a sip, and the sweet taste sent a rush to my head. All the small bubbles sparked in my mouth. As I looked at the diamond encrusted waves, I felt like I was drinking the liquid star shine that reflected in the perfect water.
“I have something to tell you, Grant.”
He looked at me, with a cool but somewhat concerned expression. “What is it?”
“I don’t have a skin condition. I can swim just fine. I just didn’t feel like surfing on a first date.”
He laughed and nodded. “I thought you were going to say you had cancer or something. I’m glad to know it’s the opposite.” The music danced around us in the air for a moment. “In that case, we are going to have to take a dip in that water.”
I looked at his eyes. They were so soft. He looked back at mine. Little by little we leaned into each other’s gaze. I lost all the air in me. I closed my eyes.
His lips were soft and warm, parting mine. The kiss didn’t last very long, but it felt like an eternity. He tasted like champagne. I felt my heart flutter. I wanted to kiss more. When I opened my eyes, I looked around to make sure no one saw. My mother and Tom were both staring because of course they were.
It felt wrong, but also so perfect and so right. He put a hand on my knee and the shock woke me back up. It was all a lie. He was just acting. This was part of the job. This was what I paid him for. I felt disappointed. His face looked so sincere. Maybe he was sincere?
No, it couldn’t have been. I wasn’t going to fall for him. He had to act as the date of other women several times. He had this down to a fine art. It was all just a play and I was his stage.
Oscar for the best kiss goes to Grant and April in “Weekend at Tom’s Wedding”.
He grabbed my hand and kissed that too. “We better say goodbye to everyone before we go back to our room.” I was still in a state of shock so all I could do was nod and follow his lead. I wasn’t nearly as experienced as he was, and I wanted his charm to rub off on me. Maybe at least the alcohol would help.
We conquered our goodbyes, talking to hopefully everyone that we had to. We held hands, said what a lovely evening it was, and asked all the right questions without lingering too long. I didn’t mind being the dog on his leash for social interactions. It was easier for me this way.
I felt my lips over and over with my fingers as we went to the elevators. I wanted more, but knew that I couldn’t accept it.
14
Grant
We stumbled back to the room as gracefully as we could. She made it look easy. I was having a bit more difficult time keeping it together. She had been sort of quiet in the elevators and I wondered if I had ruined the night somehow. I hoped that the kiss wasn’t too far, and had I been sober I would have kept it strictly professional. She just looked so nice that evening, and she was so enchanting. Her laugh made you feel like dancing. We came as close as we could to dancing, and I’ll be damned if this walk back to the room isn’t a clumsy version of a waltz.
Auctioned to Him Book 8 Page 82