by D. N. Hoxa
“Yes, you are. I’m not leaving you out of my sight,” he said, and I could swear he was smiling. Smiling because he knew what I was going to say.
“Why, because I’m just a little girl? Newsflash, buddy. From now on, I’m taking care of myself.” Bugz started to laugh, and Hammer giggled. “Oh, and fuck you, Hammer.” I couldn’t not say that. “You too, Bugz.”
“I got a newsflash for you, too. You are coming with me,” he said and stepped behind me. I wondered if he was going to grab me. Before he could, Bugz came to my side and grabbed my arm with a smile. I looked down at it, and she should’ve gotten the memo by that.
“Come on, Morta. Let’s go.”
“You won't like it if I bite you.” Her eyes widened the second she heard my whisper. I knew Hammer told her. I heard him when he thought I didn’t. But it was fine by me. She took a step back and let go of me.
“I know why you don’t like me,” she said, nodding. “We’re the same.”
I started to laugh. “I am nothing like you.”
“Oh, yeah? You’re not stubborn and mouthy and simply a bitch all the time? You don’t like to pick fights just because?” She grinned, catching my flinch.
“Would you just stop? Really, how the hell do you even do this? How can you fight all the time and never get tired of it?” Hammer said, and though I was looking at Bugz’s smiling face, I could tell he was shaking his head.
“It’s in the blood. And apparently in my venom, too,” I said and gave her half a smile in return. She didn’t seem scared, but I didn’t really want to scare her. God knows that would’ve made my life easier, but I didn’t really mean to.
So I just turned the other way and walked ahead. While Hammer and Dublin talked, I was going to walk around the huge wall to see every line and every curve of it. It was so much better than the wall of Boston. But I recognized Hammer’s steps behind me, and I was going to have to spend a little more energy before I could be on my own.
“Don’t waste your night, Hammer.”
“You know, sometimes I just want to get in your head and find out where all of it comes from. That attitude and those words,” he said, and I thought, funny, I often wonder the same thing.
I would’ve maybe told him, on some night when I was in a good mood, but things like that, you just can't put into words. Thoughts, maybe. But when I thought of it, of my past, all I saw was rejection, hatred in my mother’s eyes, hatred in all the eyes that ever looked at me. And then fire. And then sharp teeth. And then blood.
“Morta, you’re being illogical,” Hammer said, calling me back to the present. I kept walking and pretending to be interested in the view around me. Well, just the wall. The other side was nothing but burnt trees and broken homes, broken cars and broken asphalt. A hell without the flames.
“So you’re just going to ignore me now?” I didn’t know why he insisted I talk to him or go with him to see Dublin.
“Did you hear what he said to me?” I asked, because I sure as hell did hear clearly when the vampire told me he wouldn't hear from me again. I didn’t know how Hammer took it, but to me it sounded like a threat, no less.
“You’ll be with me,” he said.
“And when he wants to kill me, you’re going to fight them again? All of them and then Dublin? Are you going to tell them to let me go again?” I said, mockery clear in my voice. It probably wasn’t fair, but I was being pushed. I was a little girl, all right. So much so that I’d never, ever admit it.
“Probably. But they won't attack you when you’re with me and with Dublin,” he said, without even trying to deny it.
“What do you get out of this, Hammer? I mean, I get that you need me to find Everard, but do you want him so badly that you’d put yourself in danger over and over again?” I said, and then continued to the next thought that formed in my head before I could let my pride shut my mouth. “You know Bugz is right, right? You know you’re exposing yourself to too much danger for me. Is my Lord worth it?”
“No,” he said in the next heartbeat. I stopped walking and turned around. He looked calm while he watched me. “He isn’t. Now, can we move on?”
He waved both his hands back the way we had come.
“I heard that!” we heard Bugz’s call from far away. I rolled my eyes, but I got myself into that, and there was nothing I could do anymore. I should’ve at least whispered when I said she was right. Now I was never going to hear the end of it.
“Hammer, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here when you get back, and I’ll keep my end of the deal.”
He could’ve been thinking that I wanted to run away from him now that I knew I could kill with just a bite. Maybe that’s why he didn’t want me out of his sight. It was a reasonable thought to think.
“I know you won't run away, Morta. You’re not stupid.”
“Then stop treating me like a fool.”
“Stop acting like one, and just listen to me for once,” he said.
“Stop telling me what to do!”
“If I don’t tell you what to do, you’ll be dead before you can say elephant!” Elephant? What the hell?
“Why won't you just leave me alone?” I asked, after a loud sigh. I didn’t even want to fight with him anymore. I just wanted to be on my own.
“I’m not going to leave you alone, Morta,” he said, but the way he made it sound, it was so very close to a promise, not a threat. When I looked up at him, I found him staring at my face, all the seriousness of the world settled on his cheekbones and his downturned lips. “Let’s not do this. Come on, I don’t want to fight you all the time. Let’s just go meet Dublin, and see what he knows.”
“Fine,” I whispered and walked right past him to get back to Bugz.
I couldn’t believe that vampire. And I couldn’t believe myself! A few words—nice words—and I turned into a lamb? Two months ago I would’ve laughed at the mere thought of myself acting like this. I didn’t trust people—or vampires for that matter—and that was my rule. The rule that kept me alive. But I was walking toward death with each step I took closer to Everard. So why did I even bother?
***
We found Dublin sitting on the porch of a very lucky, one-story house. It was small and made completely out of wood, and I wondered how it had survived the wreck around it. Everything else on all four sides was destroyed.
No, it must’ve been rebuilt by someone. It looked so neat and comfortable, exactly the kind of house I would’ve loved to live in, in a different life.
Wave and the other vampire that was with him when we first met sat there, too. But inside, I could hear and smell four others. I was expecting five more to appear any minute now.
Wave and his colleague moved to the porch entrance the second they heard us. We took our time walking to the porch, and I tried my best to convince myself that it was going to be okay. That I was with Hammer, and so far, he hadn’t let anything bad happen to me. I owed him trust.
“Thought I made myself clear last night,” Dublin called when we were still too far away from him.
“I found you, just like you asked,” Hammer said, and I heard the smile in his voice.
“I didn’t think you had it in you to come here. But maybe your name has been your destiny all along,” Dublin said to me.
I flinched and shivered at the same time. If he only knew.
“That’s no news to me,” I mumbled. When we finally were across from Wave and his friend, and they burned me with their eyes for a few seconds, Dublin asked us up the two wooden steps. They had no choice but to make way. I saw their jaws work, knowing very well what that meant. If they opened their mouths that second, I was sure I’d see only sharp teeth.
“She’s with me,” Hammer said as if that would make up Dublin’s mind.
“And you think that makes this okay, why?” Dublin asked, a small smile touching his lips.
Hammer took a quick look back at the two vampires, standing above us, just like last time. “You wouldn’t want me fo
r your enemy. Or has that changed?” he said, so seriously and coldly that for a second, I wondered if I really knew him at all. I forgot all about the way we talked and fought all the time, and then, I almost forgot the kiss he gave me. It was so full and so desperate that it was hard for a second to imagine it came from the same vampire sitting by my side.
A dark cloud seemed to cover Dublin’s face in a second. His dark eyes became even darker, and all traces of the smile were gone. He put his finger in front of his lips, looking at Hammer with his brows raised as if he just realized something. Something of great importance.
“Leave us,” he said when I expected him to start laughing and tell Hammer that he must be out of his mind. It was only reasonable for me to think so, because he was in command of eleven other, dangerous vampires while Hammer was his own man.
But a second after Dublin spoke, the door of the house opened, and all four vampires walked out. I felt each pair of eyes on my head and despite knowing that I shouldn’t, I had to turn around and look at them.
The looks they gave me were more than every angry—even mad—look I had ever seen before. Not even my mother’s eyes could come close to the dark ones that were eating at me from a distance. I felt despicable. I felt rotten, worse than I already knew I was. I couldn’t breathe until all of them walked ahead, achingly slowly, and the dark made it impossible to see them anymore.
When I turned back, both Dublin and Hammer were looking at me. I was a coward, the worst there was, but I couldn’t keep my head down. I watched them, too, with the same coldness. We sat in silence for a good few minutes before Dublin finally spoke again, and I wished that he hadn't said anything at all.
“They’re going to kill her if they see her again. I can only hold them back for so long.”
My stomach turned as I imagined all of those vampires tearing me apart, limb by limb. It wasn’t a pretty sight in my mind. My fingertips shook with nervousness, and I felt filled, like I could explode any second now.
“They can try,” I mumbled, because I needed to say something. Not that I didn’t know that I could do absolutely nothing if they decided that was it for me. But I’d rather be killed by Hammer.
“Don’t be naïve. If you think that because your bite kills a vampire you will survive this life, you’re a fool. If anything, your death bite will be the reason why you won't,” Dublin said after he laughed dryly at my comment.
“That’s enough. No one will come near her as long as she’s with me,” Hammer said, and I felt so trusting of his words, so relieved that I actually wanted to hug him or smile at him.
“About that,” Dublin said and took a moment to switch his legs and sit straighter. “I am going to go ahead and assume that you’ve lost your mind. It’s the best I can come up with right now.”
The guy wasn’t kidding, but Hammer smiled.
“So I’ve been told recently. That still isn’t any of your business. I am here to talk about Mohg.”
“What about Mohg?” Dublin didn’t even flinch.
“I’ve been hearing things. Things I know you can explain,” Hammer said.
“Oh,” Dublin said, and a mischievous smile appeared on his face again. “Where is Bugz?”
He looked around in the dark as if hoping to see her coming. Seemed like the two went way back.
“Around,” Hammer said.
“What did she tell you?”
“Exactly what she saw.” He reached for his back pocket and pulled out a piece of paper, the same one Bugz had given him with Dublin’s drawing on it. But the interesting thing was that Dublin didn’t seem surprised at all.
“I see,” he said.
“Whatever you wanted to tell me with this is still lost on me.”
“Excuse me?” The words slipped before I could stop myself. I turned to Hammer. Did he just say what I thought he did? Because I didn’t remember him saying that Dublin had actually left that piece of paper for him specifically. That kind of thing I would’ve remembered.
The look Hammer gave me said that I should’ve kept my mouth shut, just like I suspected.
“I don’t feel comfortable discussing this in front of the young one. No offense,” Dublin said, folding his hands on his lap.
“Can you not call me the young one? Seriously, it’s annoying,” I hissed at him before I turned to Hammer again. “What exactly do you mean? Like he left this on purpose for you to find it? I thought you said—”
“Morta, we’ll talk about this later,” Hammer said and turned to Dublin. “I trust her. Go ahead.”
“Are you sure?” Dublin didn’t seem to share Hammer’s opinion of me. There was nothing I could say to that.
“Yes.”
The vampire took his time to analyze me. His eyes tried to read me like I was a freaking book. I don’t know what he was expecting to see on my face, but I didn’t ask and he didn’t tell.
“I left you that to warn you,” Dublin said.
“About what?”
“Just to warn you about everything. You’ve been around these parts long enough. I think it’s time you traveled,” he said, raising his brow.
“I’m not going to travel anytime soon, so just tell me what this is,” Hammer said, showing him the piece of paper again.
Dublin sighed loudly. “Very well. I just hope you know what you’re doing,” he said to Hammer, but the way he said it, it just didn’t feel right to me. It wasn’t a threat, no. It was more like pleading, like heartfelt advice. Like he was urging him, asking him to reconsider. This showed me such a different, strange side of Dublin and ignited the curiosity in my chest. What was their story? So far, I hadn't seen any vampire care for another. Even Bugz wouldn’t stick to fight with Hammer, though they’d known each other for centuries and considered each other friends. Something was off about this.
“Walls are being monitored, breaking points identified. Things stolen.”
“Things.” Hammer didn’t make it sound like a question, but Dublin elaborated.
“A very rare element.”
“I read about it. CFPH. Some sort of a chemical combination of iron, water, something called chelate, and something else,” Hammer said. “Holy…” That’s as far as he went. I was dying to know what he’d just figured out.
“Lots of it,” Dublin said, nodding.
“Why? And where are they taking it?” Hammer continued, each word closer to a whisper.
“Still don’t know, but it isn’t good. I’ve been able to track some of importance to the south. Brazil,” Dublin answered.
“What’s your role in all this?” Hammer said, taking his word for it.
“I’ve been given an order, not information. Mohg gave me a month. I finished in two weeks. I’m heading back tomorrow.”
Dublin sounded proud.
“What have you found?”
“What do you plan to do?” Dublin asked instead of answering.
Hammer took his time to think through the answer he wanted to give. “Find Chandra.”
A bad taste rested on my tongue at the mentioning of his mate. I wasn’t jealous, of course, but he did kiss me, so…
“It’s been three years,” Dublin said with a sigh.
“She was my mate.”
The taste in my mouth got worse.
“I never liked her,” Dublin said frowning, as if that had some sort of importance. Again, the suspicion in me grew. “I will say what I said to you last time. A vampire doesn’t disappear unless she really wants to.”
“I do know that, Dublin. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t owe me the reason. If she has one,” Hammer said, looking at the other like he was trying to figure something else out, something as important as the first one. And then he did. “You’ve heard.”
Dublin turned his head to the side immediately.
“What have you heard?”
“Again, what do you plan to do?”
“Find her.”
And here I was trying to convince myself that he was only after E
verard. I always knew I was stupid so I wasn’t too hard on myself for being blind to the fact that he was still in love with his lost mate.
“See, that’s what bothers me,” Dublin said, shaking his finger in front of Hammer’s face.
“It shouldn’t bother you.”
“You’re going to get yourself killed,” Dublin hissed.
“I’ve survived for this long, haven’t I?”
And he had. The question was, why did Dublin care so much?
“This is Mohg we’re talking about.”
“Last time she was seen, it was with Everard. So, whatever Mohg put you on, he’s in it with Everard, right?” Hammer continued. Dublin’s silence was confirmation that he was right. “So if I find Everard, I find Chandra.”
“I will warn you while you’re still here. Do not get yourself into this,” Dublin said, the advice sounding like a pleading again. The way his eyes spoke when they looked at Hammer, it was as if he was really afraid about his being harmed. Almost as if he loved him.
“I am already into this. I’m going to get to the bottom of it, and you’re going to help me,” Hammer said coldly. Dublin sighed loudly.
“Brazil. She’s in Brazil, and that is where they’re taking all the stuff, though I never saw this CFPH.”
“Thank you,” Hammer said and stood up. I followed right behind.
“Hammer, for my sake, think this through again,” Dublin said, grabbing Hammer’s shoulder. He looked almost desperate.
“I will,” Hammer said, covering Dublin’s hand with his.
“Do not let them see her again. I can’t stop them,” Dublin said and looked at me disapprovingly.
“I can stop them myself,” I said.
“They’re already on their way.” Hammer looked behind us with a smile on his face, before he grabbed my hand in his and whispered. “Run.”
We did.
***
“What’s with you and that guy?” I asked Hammer as soon as he approved of the building top we chose for the night. “I mean, he leaves clues for you? He is genuinely concerned for your well-being? He gives you advice?”
I could have kept the list going, but he decided to answer with a bunch of crap.