Saving Us

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Saving Us Page 7

by Ashley Johnson


  “Is this ok?” he whispers into my ear.

  All I can do is nod my head. I’m too scared to speak. My words would make no sense right now. Where the hell is sensible Sybil when I need her. My mind knows this is wrong. I avoid Blaine for a reason but yet here I am letting him grope my ass. I’m not drunk. I’m nowhere near the level of being drunk, so that isn’t an excuse. I close my eyes and all I can do is smell him. Good God, this feels a little too right when I want nothing more to think it’s wrong.

  The song ends and he slightly pulls away. I’m so mesmerized by the moment that I nearly fall forward. His strong arms catch me and I can’t help but jerk my eyes towards his. “How much have you had to drink?” he asks eyeballing me.

  “Not nearly enough,” I mutter.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Why are you doing this Blaine?” I have to know. Yes, I’m ruining possibly the best moment but I can’t help it.

  “Doing what? Dancing with you? You’re beautiful doll face, I couldn’t help it.” There’s that sexy lazy smile, the one that I hate because it does all kinds of gooey things to my insides.

  I scrunch my nose up at his nickname for me slowly pull myself away from him. As I lean forward, he inches closer and closer until his mouth is a breath away from mine. Oh. My. God. I can feel my breath hitch and my heart begins pounding relentlessly inside my chest. Just as I think he may lean in to kiss me, my heart takes over and I snap out of it. I can’t let this happen.

  ‘Livin on a Prayer’ by Bon Jovi starts up and I fight the tears starting to sting my eyes. For a moment, I see Caleb’s face and emotion takes over. Caleb sang this to me the first time he said I love you, this isn’t right. I step back removing my hands from him and shake my head.

  “Blaine, this can’t happen.”

  “What’s happening Sybil? I haven’t done anything.”

  “I have to go.”

  I turn on my heel and walk as briskly as I can without running into anyone. Cory and Megan are slow dancing together and my guess is they didn’t see me or Megan would be running after me. I find a corner that no one is around and I back into it letting out an aggravated breath. I want to scream, I want to punch the wall. This is unfair. My heart isn’t ready for this, so why is it betraying me?

  “Sybil?” Blaine whispers.

  Dammit, of course he found me. I look up to meet him, I can’t help the tears that are welling up in my eyes. They have nothing to do with him, but he doesn’t know that. It’s all this damn song. I hear it and it’s like I can feel Caleb holding me as we dance and his soft voice singing in my ear, “Take my hand, we’ll make it I swear.” But we didn’t make it anywhere.

  Blaine’s hand meets my cheek and he wipes the stray tear away. This is the second time he’s done that for me. Before I can protest, his lips softly kiss the spot where his hand just was and I feel every nerve in my body ignite. My mind tries to protest and make this nonsense stop but my mind is no longer in control. His lips move from my cheek to the corner of my lips and I hold my breath. He plants one last soft, mind-blowing kiss on my lips and my treacherous mouth kisses him back. Slowly, my mouth opens inviting him in and he kisses me slow and sensuously. I find the back of his neck and pull him closer and he lets out a small growl. He steadies the back of my head as his tongue continues to work against mine. When he pulls away, I’m standing there trying to regain my composure and my breath.

  “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself. Don’t be mad at me.”

  I just look at him, I am still stuck in la la land. “Don’t be sorry.”

  He looks like he’s getting ready to speak or maybe kiss me again but his phone rings and he shoots me an apologetic look as he pulls it from his pocket. His eyes darken at whoever is calling him and he shoves his phone back in his pocket. Frustrated, he runs his hand through his hair and mutters, “Fuck.”

  “Do you need to get that?” I ask.

  His eyes go from dark to sad as he looks at me. “I’ll find you in a minute.” And just like that, I’m left in the corner feeling like I’ve been punched in the stomach.

  ***

  Blaine

  Landon would ruin a moment like this, it’s what he does. I’m beginning to worry he isn’t sticking to his word and he has someone here watching me. He told me I had a month, I still have time. I don’t need a babysitter. I wouldn’t be surprised. I know he doubts me for the fact that I haven’t already completed what I was sent here for. Hell, I doubt myself. I have to turn the tables here, I want to protect her. She doesn’t deserve any of this. She doesn’t deserve me. That kiss was electrifying. I didn’t mean to do it. I told myself I wouldn’t do it, but dammit I don’t regret it. She tasted so sweet, like heaven.

  I walk outside to get away from the music of the club. I’m sure he’s getting ready to bitch me out for not answering the minute he called. Before I can call him back, his name reappears on my phone. “Hello?”

  “Blaine, Blaine, Blaine.” Fuck this isn’t good. “Tell me something good.”

  I just stand there listening to the silence on the other end of the line. He’s waiting for me to speak and right now I have no idea what to tell him. “Landon, I’m working on it.”

  “I know this. You keep telling me that every time I call. When should I see progress? Time is ticking for her….and for you.”

  I swallow and try to catch my breath. “She’s just starting to trust me ok? I’ll get it done.”

  “Think about if this girl and her kiss is worth it. Is it worth your life? Because if I didn’t know any better you’re thinking with your dick and that’s a sure fire way to make this blow up in your face. Think about it Blaine.” End of call.

  I fucking knew it. He sent someone here, but who? Now I really worry about Sybil and I have to get back inside and make sure she’s ok. I have no idea who is here, but I don’t trust any of them for a minute. He doesn’t trust me, that’s what this says. It hasn’t even been a week and he’s already got someone keeping tabs on me.

  I turn and practically run for the front doors. I have to get back inside. The minute I step inside, I have to blink a few times to readjust to the lighting. I walk briskly to the corner we just stood in but she’s gone. My heart begins pounding in my chest as the worst scenarios pop into my head. If someone got ahold of her, I’ll never forgive myself. My next stop is the bar but as I scan the bar up and down, there is no sign of her or her friends. The last place to look is the dance floor and for the first time in my life, I’m praying to God that she is there dancing without a care in the world with a beautiful smile on her face. But I’m crushed when I look all over the crowd and see that she is nowhere to be found. This night has turned into a nightmare and I won’t stop until I find her and know she is safe.

  I head back for the doors praying I missed her, but I still don’t see her. I run outside and scan the area for any vehicles that look out of place. I see nothing and my heart is pounding harder than before thinking someone has already taken her and she’s gone.

  “Dammit!” I yell not caring who hears me, but not many people are outside. They are all still inside stuck in the 1980’s. No one knows the danger Sybil may be in, and they probably don’t care but I do. I got her into this mess, now I will get her out of it.

  I’m about ready to head to my truck and start scoping the area out a little closer when I hear a laugh. My eyes dart across the parking lot and I see her. Shit, I see her! I’ve never been more excited in my entire damn life and I don’t give a fuck who Landon has here watching me, I need to talk to her one more time. I wish I could warn her to be careful but that would blow my cover and I can’t do that. I can’t risk her not being able to trust me. I may be the devil, but deep down, I’m her heaven sent angel. I’m the one who can truly keep her out of harm’s way.

  “Sybil!” I call out as I jog to where she is.

  She turns abruptly looking rather shocked that I’m running towards her. The blonde girl beside her smiles widely a
nd looks between Sybil and I. I see Cory and am at least glad she rode with them. I feel much better about her safety now.

  When I finally reach her, I’m almost out of breath but I quickly regain composure. “You’re leaving?”

  “Yeah, we’ve had our fun for the night.” She’s acting like we didn’t share something completely beautiful moments ago, but that’s probably for the best.

  “Can I have your phone number?”

  She looks at me like I just rattled off a whole story in Japanese. Cory looks at me suspiciously before shaking his head and stepping into his truck. His girlfriend nudges Sybil before doing the same and then it’s just the two of us outside the truck.

  “You want my phone number?”

  “If you want to give it to me, yes.” I say hopeful she will. I need to know she’s safe when I’m not near her.

  She closes her eyes like she’s thinking and when she reopens them she has a faint smile on her lips. Quickly she rattles off a number and I quickly save it to my phone. I text her immediately so she has my number.

  Me: Will you let me know when you make it home doll face?

  She stares at the text then gives me an ‘are you kidding me’ look. I don’t think it’s because of what I asked, it’s because of what I called her. I can’t help it, she will learn to like it.

  She doesn’t answer but begins typing on her phone.

  Sybil: I suppose I can do that.

  I smile as she backs up to the truck door. “I’m glad I got to see you tonight. I didn’t know you came to this.” I tell her.

  “It’s kind of a big deal for Cory, Megan, me and--,” she stops herself and I know exactly who she was getting ready to name. Waves of guilt crash over me because I wish I had no idea who he was or what he did. It’s not that easy though, because I know everything. “It’s just really fun, we like it. I’ll, uh, see you at work Monday Blaine.”

  And just like that she climbs in the truck and they pull away. I feel a little more at ease, now that I have a way to get ahold of her, if something’s wrong. I can never let her feel like she’s in danger. I can’t scare her away at all.

  I’m cautious walking back to my truck but still see no signs of danger. I climb into my truck and let it roar to life. I notice a paper under my windshield wipers and I roll the window down to grab it. My eyes widen when I read the handwritten words:

  That kiss was sweet. I wonder if she’d kiss me like that? Who knows what else I may be able to get her to do if you fuck this up. Landon says hi.

  I recognize the handwriting immediately and my stomach begins turning. Landon sent Dante here and if he so much as puts a hand on her, I won’t stop until I kill both of them. I’m getting ready to pull out of the parking lot when my phone buzzes. I’m irritated thinking its Landon and I’m ready to unleash and give him a piece of my mind but I see it’s a text from Sybil. She actually did it.

  Sybil: I’m home. See you Monday.

  Me: See you Monday doll face.

  No response after that but I didn’t really expect one either. I want to get as far away from this club as I can. I’m livid that Dante is here somewhere watching. Two can play at this game.

  Chapter 10

  Sybil

  Today is Sunday, it’s the day I go visit Caleb’s parents. I had all day yesterday to sit around and think about the night before at the club. All I could think about were Blaine’s lips on mine and how daring he was to come up to me and ask for my phone number. Maybe I am wrong about him. He could be a really great guy and here I am refusing to see that. It’s not like he’s asking me to marry him or even go on a date, not that I’m ready for anything like that. Surely it won’t kill me to be nice, will it? At the same time, I haven’t even heard from him since he requested that I let him know when I got home. Oh well, I’m not losing anything over it. Megan called me yesterday trying to drag the details out of who the club guy was and I practically went deaf when I admitted that was Blaine. She asked how come I didn’t tell her right away and now that I think about it, I have no clue why I didn’t.

  The drive goes by a little too quickly and I’m now parking in the driveway staring at the magnolia tree that mocks me and the happiness Caleb and I shared. Who am I kidding? I can’t be mad at a tree. The tree didn’t do anything wrong, it just stands there in its beautiful glory, leaves blowing in the wind. I stand still, letting the breeze sweep over me before walking myself to the front door. It still hurts like hell to walk into this house, but I do it because this is the only family I know now.

  Gently, I knock at the door before turning the knob and pushing it forward. Just like I’ve done many times, I step inside and I smell what I think is pot roast. My stomach instantly begins growling, begging for just a small taste. My eyes dance over the same pictures of Caleb and me in the foyer, I miss that beautiful smile of his. I miss everything about him.

  “Sybil! Come on in, we’ve been waiting for you.” David wastes no time ushering me inside.

  “It’s so good to see you. It smells delicious in here.” I stop and pull Lillian in for a hug. She hugs me tightly back.

  “Sybil, I thought I heard you. How’s school going? Are you ready to quit at the bookstore? You know we will help you get your money back.”

  “David—“

  “Ok, I won’t push it. I had to ask. Just say the word and it’s done.”

  “Yes sir. This semester is actually pretty easy so far. I have decent professors and I love going up to the school and seeing the kids. That’s my favorite part.”

  “We’re so proud of you, honey. We can’t wait to watch you graduate next year.” David smiles at me.

  “I can’t believe I’ve come this far. I never even imagined I would get into college.”

  “Believe it, Sybil. We’re behind you completely.”

  We chit chat a few more minutes before eating lunch. It’s a late lunch but that’s ok. I’m stuffed. Lillian Thomas can make one hell of a pot roast. She tempts us with dessert, banana pudding to be exact and I get a small helping. I’m not ready to leave yet, I still treasure every memory. All three of us sit in the living room while Mr. Thomas begins flipping through the TV guide.

  “Never anything but junk on anymore.”

  “I know, I can’t stand reality TV and that’s all you ever see.” I’m not a typical young lady. I can’t stand reality TV, it’s not real. It’s fake and people are just too into it to see it.

  “I thought I saw a movie a few channels back, I’ll just put that on and hope it’s something good.”

  I smile and relax as he goes back a few channels. I’m not even sure what’s on, but we watch it laughing and talking the whole time like nothing ever happened. It’s nice, but at the same time, it feels so wrong.

  Lillian gets up and disappears for a few minutes before coming back into the living room. She smiles as she sits beside me keeping her fist closed. I’m curious and nervous all at the same time. I have no idea what she has or why her eyes are beginning to look glassy like she may cry at any time.

  “Sybil, no matter what happens, no matter where life takes you, we want you to remember you will always be like our daughter. This was my grandmother’s pearl ring. Caleb was going to give it to you the night you two got married. We had it turned into a necklace so you can wear it. I want you to have it.”

  My jaw drops, hitting the floor with a loud thud. All I can hear is my heart pounding as I stare at the beautiful ring. “I can’t accept this.”

  “Yes, you can. We want you to have it. Nothing would make us happier.” She insists.

  I look to David for some kind of help with this, but he just smiles and nods his head for me to take it. Slowly I reach for the necklace and cradle it in my hand. This necklace is beautiful and there is no way in hell that I can ever wear this. If anything happened to it, I could never live with myself.

  “I can’t wear it.”

  “Yes, you can. Let me show you.” She gently pushes my hair from my neck and places the neck
lace on me. Once she clasps it together, I steady my hands to hold it. I need to feel is against my bare hands. I close my eyes and I can picture Caleb holding the necklace in his hands. I can feel him breathe into my ear, that I’m the only one for him. I open my eyes and am brought back to the cruel reality that is now my life.

  “I’ll treasure this, forever.” I tell her. The smile on her face tells me she knows I will.

  It breaks my heart to see the sun beginning to set. Time has flown by and now I have to head home alone, alone with nothing but my memories to keep me warm at night. I hug them tightly, promising to come back next week. I wonder if Caleb is smiling down, knowing they still love me. Speaking of Caleb, I decide I need to go see him today. I was going to wait until tomorrow but I miss him terribly, especially after this visit to his parents. I usually stop and buy flowers but I just drive until I reach the cemetery.

  I climb out of truck carefully holding onto the necklace like it’s my lifeline, as I make my way slowly to where he lays. My beautiful, sweet Caleb, the only guy I’ve ever truly cared for.

  “I miss you.” I whisper to the headstone. I know he can’t hear me, but I continue to speak anyway. “I think you’d be proud of me. School is going good and Cory has kept his promise. He’s the best I could ask for. I just came from your parents’ house. Mom cooked a roast and it was good. She gave me the pearl necklace today. I told her I couldn’t accept it but she insisted. I wish you were here to have given it to me, but I’ll treasure it for the rest of my life.”

  A rumble of thunder rolls in the distance and I look up at the sky. I should have watched the weather, but that was the last thing on my mind. I stare at the headstone for another few minutes before blowing a kiss and straightening myself up. It’s getting easier to walk out here and not completely lose my mind. For a while, I couldn’t come out here without breaking down into nonstop tears. I’m proud of myself for the strength I’ve obtained throughout this whole ordeal.

 

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