“Nick, what’s going on in there?”
He doesn’t respond.
“Nick, please answer me. Tell me you’re okay.”
Still he remains silent, furthering my concern. If I can’t get to him, I at least have to try to reach out to someone. Lana will wake up soon, and I have no idea what she’s capable of. Last night aside, I know without question Heather would help me in a heartbeat.
Lana has barricaded the door, much more effectively than I managed to last night. No matter how much I try to break it open something is keeping it firmly in place. I begin pounding the aged wooden door until my fists throb, screaming in pain.
“Heather! Lana’s in here!”
I continue thrashing the door in hopes that she will hear me. The clock reads nine a.m. Heather will have surely left for work already. I’m abandoned—trapped, with no other alternative than to escape from a twenty-foot-high window.
I tug hard, trying to pry it open. Heather made sure the last time that I would never be able to get that window open again. The only other time it was opened was when Nick visited, but he secured it back—I think, unless it was another optical illusion. Every obvious escape route is blocked, now I’m beginning to panic.
At some point Lana awakes, surely from the loud pounding I’ve been vibrating through the apartment. She watches with an evil smirk as I desperately scan the room, hoping for a miracle.
“You aren’t going anywhere, Sydney. I made quite sure of that.”
Everything about her screams crazy, from her wild eyes to her bare feet. She’s as intimidating as she is insane—to the core.
“What do you want from me, Lana?”
“I want what’s mine—Dominick.”
“He doesn’t want you.”
An aggravated sigh breezes from her mouth as she stands up and begins twirling her greasy blonde locks around her index finger, calculating her next move. She thrives on the knowledge that she has me cornered. I do my best to seem unconcerned by her presence, sensing my fear will do nothing more than appease her even more thoroughly. Even without the added complication of being overly sluggish and groggy from the Ambien, I truly have nowhere to go, and zero defense against a mentally unstable girl. The one option I might hold is humoring her. She is so thoroughly obsessed with Nick…he might be the key to calming her. As sickening as the thought is, I’m going to have no alternative—I have to make her think that Nick still loves her, although he never did. This could prove to be difficult given the position she found us in only moments ago; he and I in bed, lovingly holding each other after a beautiful night of adventures. A large part of me is childishly irritated that she messed up my perfect evening. Everything had been so absolutely perfect until this point. I truly hate this girl right now. Keeping the agenda in the forefront is going to take some work, and definitely a great deal of acting, as my teeth instinctively grit as I begin my lying game.
“Look, Lana. He thought you were never coming back. If I hadn’t comforted him while you were gone, he could have hurt himself. Don’t you know anything about people with bipolar? They don’t handle change very well.” I swallow the bile that rises in my throat.
“I would have never gone voluntarily, it was Heather’s fault.”
“Then why are you so angry at me? I’ve done everything I can to help him. Lord knows what would have happened if I hadn’t stepped in. He really cared for you, he was so alone.”
“Really, he said that?” Her bottom lips quivers.
I think carefully before answering. I need her to know I can still communicate with Nick outside of sleep. This way she knows she hasn’t completely entrapped me. Perhaps not the best idea, but I need leverage too. Neither she nor I are able to sleep twenty-four hours a day, so I can become valuable to her if I can communicate FOR her. She could never attain power in meditation, her mind is too tainted. This could make me valuable to her, giving me a fighting chance against her harming me.
“He didn’t exactly say those words. He is very protective over his feelings. I picked up on some of his thoughts during meditation. That’s how we communicate outside sleep.”
“What? How is that possible? I tried everything to get to him while I was awake, even went as far as causing myself pain so I would pass out. Still nothing.”
I omit the knowledge that Nick had been evading her deliberately.
“It’s nothing you were doing wrong. Full meditation is an extremely hard thing to accomplish. I’ve had a lot of practice.”
“You will teach me then.”
“It’s not something you can just teach someone. It takes years of practice and concentration. We don’t have that kind of time. We need to figure this mystery out before Nick gives up and his world collapses in on him.”
“Why do you call him Nick? I’ll bet he hates that. I tried to call him pet names, and he couldn’t stand it.”
“Dominick is a mouthful, that’s all. It’s not really a term of endearment, I’m just a lazy speaker. He tolerates it.” I smirk, enjoying the fact that he loathes her so entirely. It’s comforting.
Where she seems to have calmed slightly, her tense posture and the jerky nature to her slight movements tell me I am nowhere near talking my way out of this situation. Fueling her love for Dominick by making her think he was deeply interested might not have been the best move, possibly only increasing her desperation. A different avenue might be the way to go. I need to shift the subject away from him, while somehow convincing her that Nick and I aren’t a couple. I know exactly what I need to use.
“Does my girlfriend know you’re here?”
“Heather—your girlfriend? Assuming you’re actually telling the truth, I can pretty much confirm that you just got dumped. She left you a note when she took off this morning—with a carload of suitcases.” She waves a sealed envelope in front of my face with a smile.
I snatch the note from her boney hands, tearing it as I rip it impatiently from the envelope.
Sydney,
I don’t even know where to begin. Last night I felt so out of control. I don’t know where that side of me came from. Everything happened so fast, and I couldn’t make heads or tails of anything. I didn’t feel like myself, maybe it was the mix of the wine and meds, I don’t know. I’m not making excuses for my behavior, because what happened was inexcusable. But I can say that I never meant to hurt you.
I’m leaving today, trying to sort my head out. I can’t face you right now after what happened. I’m taking a few weeks to try and find myself again. I love you, and that has not changed. I hope you can forgive me. A little time apart might be what we need to get over this. I hope you will still be here when I get back. I am so sorry.
I still love you, and I always will,
Heather
PS: I’m staying with my Mom, so I’m only a phone call away if you need me.
Somehow even after our horrible experience last night, I feel awful. I move into her house, lead her on, push her into drinking even when she warned us that it didn’t mesh well with alcohol, and finally take complete advantage, seducing her until she loses control. Now she’s run away from her own home to give ME space. This situation has gotten completely out of hand. The appropriate thing would have simply been to confront her about the bracelet, not screwing with her mind and emotions. Now I’m stuck here, alone with Lana, locked in this room for god only knows how long until someone finally decides to show up. Mia will begin wondering, as will Cayden. He wants to visit Nick today. This could end up being my saving grace.
“I’m expecting a visitor today, so you should really handle your business and leave.”
“Oh, you’re referring to Cayden Manning, right? He’s already come and gone. I told him you have the flu and will be indisposed for a while; through the door of course because he would have recognized me. I’m just that good. Don’t you agree, Sydney?”
She seems to have taken every escape route I could have possibly had.
“Lana, let’s just get t
his squared away right now. What do you want from me?”
“Well, I was supposed to get rid of you, but I have a better idea. Don’t worry though; you are really going to enjoy that dark room. I’ve set everything up perfectly for you. There’s a nice comfy couch for you to sleep on, pillows, blankets—the works. I will bring you food daily and of course water. Whereas I really don’t want you dying on me—yet, I really need you out of my way. I will allow you two bathroom visits per day, and a shower. It’ll be just like a full-service hotel, aside from being locked in.”
“If you need me out of the way so badly, why not just let me leave? You said you don’t want to kill me, so what’s the point in keeping me here? I can just walk right out the door, and you will never see me again. Doesn’t that sound like a more sensible plan?”
“I’m not stupid, no matter what Heather told you. I’m smarter than all of you. You’ll stay, and we will figure everything out once I get to the bottom of finding Dominick’s body. The deal was that I would get rid of you and pick back up with Dominick where I left off. The problem with that scenario is that I’m stuck here with super dyke, and trust me, we aren’t exactly friends. I like my plan better.”
“What plan is that?”
“I will find his body, he will crossover, and I will join him shortly after. That way we will be together forever, and not under the watchful eye of anyone else. Perfect, right?” She beams proudly at her insane suggestion.
This bitch really is crazy. You can’t just enter yourself into heaven or hell. What makes her think she can just follow someone into the afterlife? Instead of voicing my opinion I opt not to further aggravate her. I will let her believe her own delusional ramblings. I’ve chosen to refrain from objection in going to the dark room. People will come looking for me at some point, and she will be the one who must answer for her actions. If for some reason I fight Lana now and she manages to get away, I will never be able to live without looking over my shoulder for the rest of my life. I give this hostage situation a day—two days, tops. When people realize I’m missing, they’ll come with the police, and she won’t be able to run. I certainly don’t relish the thought of being locked up like a caged animal, but Nick will help me get through the loneliness and isolation. Together we can overcome anything. Once I’m alone and I can reach him, we will concoct a plan of action.
“I’ll agree to go to the dark room,” I comment casually.
“You say that as if you have a choice. Silly little girl.” A horrible ugly laugh bolsters from her thin unappealing mouth.
“I’m being cooperative because I want the best for Dominick, and that means you two finally being together.”
False or not, those words bring acid into my mouth.
“I’m so happy you feel that way, Red. I was starting to think you two were a couple, all laid up in the bed together like that. After thinking it through, I know better. Dominick would never do that to me, certainly not for a pitzy little girl like you. You’re very lucky I’ve been so reasonable about it. I honestly would have killed you on the spot, but fortunately for you—he blocked me. That’s my Dominick, so compassionate and caring. Always looking out for the less fortunate.”
“Thank you for your understanding, Lana. I can see you’re a very intelligent person. I’m very grateful you saw the truth for what it was.” I roll my eyes when she isn’t looking.
“Okay, enough of this brown-nosing. Let’s get to the dark room, Red. I have people to see.” She smirks.
I ignore my chosen pet name, even though it pierces needles of aggravation through my skull. I have bigger concerns right now, such as containing my jealousy, this isn’t the time. I know who she is talking about when she says she has people to see, and it sends discomfort crawling through my skin. She is going to be with Nick—my Nick. Holding my tongue will only last so long the more she pushes me. This is a time for wit and silence. I better get to that room before my mouth wins the internal battle and lands me in a coffin.
“Let’s go then.”
***
The reality doesn’t quite sink in until I hear the dark room door lock as she scurries away to be with my boyfriend. Darkness threatens to undo every amount of strength I’ve held until this point, as tears sting my eyes. I have no way of knowing how this will end. Good or bad, I cannot let her taint my mind to the point where I can’t concentrate and meditate. It’s all I’ve got. I do my best to clear my head. I need to talk to Nick, I couldn’t get to him earlier and I can’t relax until I know he’s okay. His velvety voice is the medicine I need to smooth the ripples of sadness running through me.
“Dominick, please answer me. Where the hell are you?”
“I can’t talk to you right now, Sydney. Pull out.”
“What—why?” I demand.
“I—I don’t want to see you anymore,” he stutters.
I know instantly, Lana must have got to him already.
“Nick, I know she’s there. Don’t answer me with your mouth. Answer me with your mind. Are you saying you don’t want to see me anymore because she’s listening to you right now?”
“That won’t be necessary, Sydney. Anything I say to you I can say in front of Lana. To answer your question, no, I really don’t want to see you anymore. Now that Lana’s back I really have no use for continuing a relationship with you. She’s close to finding answers. I need her more right now. I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you. It’s just the way it is.”
“I don’t believe you, you’re lying. You love me. I saw it. I felt it in your touch, in your kiss—when we made...magic. I love you, Nick. Please don’t do this to me.”
“What don’t you understand exactly? I want to go home. I don’t belong here, I’m dead. You’re alive. Lana is willing to do everything humanly possible to make sure I get home. You’re more concerned with keeping me here for yourself. I’m sorry, Red, it’s over.”
He just called me Red. He and Lana planned this from the start, using me until she could break out of that institution. Sadness converts to rage easily, giving me power I though was way above my head. I could rip them both apart, shred by shred, and not bat an eye.
“Don’t you dare call me that, you bastard! Is that what this is, you two sitting around laughing about how stupid and pathetic I was? She even has you calling me that ridiculous name!” Hot angry tears flow rapidly from my eyes, drenching my face.
“You and I are done. Stay away from us. We have better things to do than dabble around in silly puppy love. And just so you know, next time you try to create a perfect spot to uh—make magic, as you so childishly call it, think original, everyone’s done the beach.”
With those final harsh words the channel has been cut off. I can’t see him, I can’t smell him—he’s gone. I’m too enraged to be crushed by the fact that I will never see him again. I don’t even care right now. The most beautiful night of my life has been made a mockery. Sadness and heartbreak take a back seat to sheer humiliation. This is the lowest point—the blackest hole I’ve ever experienced, it threatens to swallow me alive as I curl into a ball in the middle of the floor. The darkness of the room keeps me hidden from the creepy shadows dancing along the wall in the dim candle light. I pray they find me and take me away.
For now sleep is all there is. My awareness of it being a lonely isolated sleep is comforting in this moment. I couldn’t handle seeing him right now, nor could I handle seeing—them. Part of me wishes to never wake up. The other part of me—the part that’s burning inside—cannot wait to rise and tear my claws into that disgusting psycho the moment she walks through the door. I hold on to that image as my eyes close for the remainder of the day and night.
***
“Rise and shine, Red. It’s a beautiful day outside. You ready for a potty break?” Lana says cheerfully.
Unfortunately, my anger and rage dissipated hours ago, regretfully being replaced by emptiness and sorrow. I hate myself for missing him, for being disappointed that I saw nothing as I dreamt, only blackness. P
ain cringes in my stomach each time his name creeps into my mind. My body is so heavy I can’t even be bothered to give Lana the lashing she deserves right now.
“I don’t need to go to the bathroom, go away,” I whisper, as my heart chokes.
“Aww, have you been crying?” She smirks. “Boys break your heart, I learned that long ago. I kinda feel sorry for you though. You tried so hard to make me believe you and Dominick weren’t involved. You aren’t very smart, are you? Did you never question how long I had been lurking around in your dream before I showed myself? Funny how quickly you forgot about that colorful little toucan. I think the red and blue feathers really brought out my eyes, don’t you, Red? It was a pretty racy show you two put on, but nothing compared to what Dominick and I did last night. You should have been there, he was mind blowing,” she torments.
“If you don’t plan on killing me, then just get the fuck out of here and leave me alone.”
“I didn’t just come to break bread with you. I was checking to see if you needed anything. You slept through breakfast and lunch so I wanted to make sure you ate dinner. I can’t have you dying on me, not yet.”
I squint slightly as the light breaks through the door. My eyes are having trouble readjusting. As soon as I begin making images out, I notice Lana has made her way through my closet and is wearing my favorite jeans and my Beatles t-shirt. My mini skirt and spaghetti strap shirt still cling to my body from last night’s escapade. It’s cold in here, I need something more to wear.
“I need some sweats and my black hoodie. I’m freezing.”
“I’ll bring ‘em when I come with your dinner. I’ve made spaghetti.”
“I’m not hungry, but I’ll still take those sweats.”
“You’re going to die in there if you keep being stubborn. Suit yourself, though. More for me.”
She brings my clothes a few minutes later. They are the only comfort I’ve found all day, offering warmth and security. If nothing else, with her gone I can at least lie here alone, without having to hear the disgusting details of their wonderful new life together. It still taunts me, however. How could he have sex with her only a day after I gave him my virginity—her, of all people? She is the foulest excuse for a woman I can imagine. Everything I saw within him was a lie. How could I have been so stupid and blind?
Dreamers (The Dreamers Series) Page 13