Cayden breathes heavily through his irritation then smoothly turns his heels walking into the door entrance, leaving us in privacy. When it comes to me, he is quite the gentleman and would never disrespect my wishes.
No sooner than he’s away from hearing distance Heather relaxes, taking a seat in the rocking chair closest to the hot tub, and begins fiddling with her hair as she stares blankly at the picture of Nick.
“What else should I know, before we go any further? I’m sick being the only schmuck in the room every time I turn around. I want it all, the entire truth. If you can’t give me that, then I really don’t know where we are supposed to go from here.” She sighs loudly.
“I never meant to be dishonest, I just didn’t really know how to say it. Look what happened to Lana when she fessed up, you had her committed. You would have thought I was crazy—you DO think I’m crazy.”
A nervous laugh creeps from her mouth showing off her gorgeous white teeth. I can detect sweat beading across her hairline as she contemplates my comment.
“There is a major difference in crazy and sane. With or without Dominick Manning in the picture, she was a flipping psycho. You aren’t crazy, you just seem to have a lying problem—a big one.” She scowls.
“My intentions were good. And I’m not a liar, I withheld things for a reason—a good reason. I hate that you’re so mad at me. I was protecting us—trying to, anyway,” I speak genuinely.
“I’m not angry with you, Syd. I just can’t keep being the only person in the dark about what’s going on with you in your life. If you want a life without me, that’s something I have no control over, but if you want me here by your side you have to make me a priority and start trusting me a little. So no, I am not mad—I am, however, scared as hell for you. This little situation of yours is NOT normal. You have no clue what you’re dealing with here.”
“Lana was my only threat, and now she’s gone and won’t be returning. So you can relax, there is no need to be fearful for me.”
“I’m not talking about outside threats; I’m referring to the direct source. The Manning family is twisted. I’ve done my fair share of research. A ghost—or whatever he is—the entire situation makes me explore ideas I never believed in. I don’t like people screwing with my reality. And I don’t like people screwing with you. Even alive, Dominick Manning was bad news, Sydney. He was an outcast, a freak with strange abilities he wasn’t even aware of. It eventually led to some mental problems. He was—IS bad news.” Concern clouds her stern face.
I am honestly taken aback at how much she knows about the man in my life. These revelations are hitting me at a speed that knocks the wind from my lungs. While I’m glad I can finally share all parts of my life with my best friend, I’m still troubled at her perception of Nick. I don’t like it one little bit how she is portraying him as some sort of monster. He had no control over the conditions born to him. Yes, the situation is as far from normal as the Earth is to the Sun, but that doesn’t make me love him any less. I have to set the record straight. She’s going to have to accept the situation for what it is. He’s a part of me now, in every literal sense possible. Without him, there is no me. Without me, his legacy will be lost, forgotten—as if he never existed.
“I’m well aware of Nick’s mental problems, Heather, and that is not his fault. He is no more dangerous than you are. I understand this is a hard thing for you to understand, your interactions with him haven’t exactly been roses and champagne. But you must understand that he has been trapped in your home for two years. He had no other option but to assume that his death was linked to you somehow. That’s why he has been so aggressive with you. He doesn’t want to hurt you or anybody else, all he wants is to find out what happened to him and why he is where he is. You can’t be angry at him for wanting answers. I’m sorry I’ve left you in the dark. I won’t hide things from you again, but you have to promise to do the same. You haven’t been honest with me either. I know you and Nick have had run ins before I even moved in, he told me everything. I’m aware he came into your dreams. I’m aware that you blocked him out with medication. I know that the night Lana drugged your wine he used a candle to knock some sense into you. I know a lot more than you’ve given me credit for. Why did you deny his existence to me, especially if you think he is a danger?”
She ponders the question quietly. It seems that words are hanging off her tongue, yet something is holding them back. She remains silent for so long I startle as she finally responds.
“At first I thought he wouldn’t be able to get through to your mind,” she sighs.
“Why not? He got to you, he got to Lana. Why not me?” I challenge, unsatisfied with her answer.
“I’m a weak personality. I was tormented so much in my youth that it eventually broke me down—I’m vulnerable. Lana too, she was—unstable on a good day. You aren’t. You’re strong and willful. I told myself it was a nightmare at first. When he got to Lana, I knew it wasn’t just my mind playing tricks on me.”
“Why didn’t you just say that then? Why lie?”
“For a while it’s all I thought about. I couldn’t figure out how he was managing to invade my dreams. I finally decided it was just flashbacks, or memories…guilt.”
“Why would you harbor guilt, or even memories? Did you know him while he was alive?” I quiz.
“Um—it’s a long story. I’ll get to that part someday, Syd. But for now I just want to make sure you know I wasn’t trying to hide things from you. Some things are just better left unsaid.”
Her lack of straightforwardness is beginning to piss me off. She expects honesty, yet answers my questions with sugar coated slivers of bullshit.
“You’re speaking in riddles. First you tell me you don’t know anything about him, now I find out you possibly even knew him personally. You’re manipulating your answers to where you have to admit nothing. It’s underhanded and sneaky. You know more than I thought. You better spill it. This is important. I want answers, not a puzzle to solve.”
“Look, Sydney, I’m already shaky when it comes to this paranormal nonsense; I choose not to acknowledge it because it creeps me out. I don’t want him in my head. Talking about it makes it more—real, I guess. Do know what I mean?”
“It’s real whether you acknowledge it or not. At what point did you decide to ignore his pleas for help and medicate him out of your mind?” I attempt to hide the disgust in my tone.
“He never once asked or pleaded for my help. There was only one thing on his mind, only one thing he had any interest in—you. It wasn’t hard for me to figure out that if he could get into my mind I could also get into his. He picked through my mind and found you there. When I picked through his mind, I saw nothing but you. His obsession for you was stronger than his need to find answers. I couldn’t let him get to you—even if through my mind. So I blocked him.”
As always, her intentions are always right on. Her execution really could use some work though. We have to learn to communicate better, if not we’re doomed to fall apart.
“That still doesn’t really explain why you denied him to me.”
“I didn’t know he had gotten to you. I thought your questions stemmed from the things I told you about Lana. If I had known you had already encountered him, I wouldn’t have denied it. I was nervous that if I told you about him—told you that he’s real—that you would open your mind to him and he would be able to get to you. His obsession with you is strong, Syd. It’s frightening how his mind works. He isn’t like me, or any other normal person you’ve known. I knew he would never let you go if he found you—ever. I was right. He already has you locked into his prison alongside him. I want you to back away from him.” Her eyes plead.
“I’m not locked into anything, I’m choosing it. And I don’t want to walk away from him. I’m here until the end. I am going to lead him home, and then I will be forced to mourn. Until then, I will love and enjoy him while I can. This is hard enough knowing I can’t keep him. I need support
. You’ll eventually get your way on this, unfortunately there is no other way for this situation to end. Just don’t ask me to choose because you won’t like my answer.”
“’I’m not asking you to choose, nor would I. This is not as simple as you’re making it sound, Sydney. Emotionally, physically—you’re in one hell of a mess.”
“I realize that, especially now that Little Monster is in the mix. I know he or she will have a lot of questions about their father, but I will have to do my best to explain. That’s something Nick and I will decide together.”
She stares—hard. I don’t know the emotional reaction brewing behind those flaming caramel eyes of hers. As well as I know her, in this moment I can’t read her at all. Something else is clicking through her mind. I can virtually hear the squeaky gears grinding in her brain.
“I need a beer.” She shakes her head, looking confused as she quickly pops inside, returning from the kitchen with two frosty beers fresh from the fridge.
“Two? Thanks, Heather but I can’t drink that.” I assume the other beer is for me.
“They’re both for me, dumb ass. I know you can’t drink while you’re pregnant, I’m not a complete idiot.” She rolls her eyes at my ridiculous comment.
“Um, should you be drinking that either? What about the interaction with the medication?”
“I’m no longer taking that medicine, not since the night I went rabid on you.” She smirks.
“I hear you. Alcohol didn’t do much for my judgment that evening either. If I didn’t tell you already, I’m really sorry for the part I played that night.”
She shrugs it off and smiles lightly, yet a concerned look still clouds her face. Temporary silence fills the electrified mountain air. Her nails bleed from constant chewing over the last few days. This has been equally hard on her, and I have to admit she has been a trooper in this situation. Her loyalty amazes me sometimes.
“Sydney, I need to know if you trust me,” she asks in a near whisper.
“Yes, I trust you, Heather. Why?”
She fiddles with her hair like she does when she nervous. Her beautiful eyes glisten in the November sun like softened butterscotch.
“I never had the chance to talk to Dominick about anything that happened to him. Now that I know you guys are involved I need to know everything he knows about his disappearance—everything.”
“Why?” I question, considering whether Nick would want me sharing this with Heather.
“Because it’s important,” she offers simply.
“That’s all you are going to give me? It’s important?”
“That’s all I can give you. Trust—remember?”
I bite the inner part of my lip, now feeling the unease of nervousness myself. I decide after several minutes that Heather is trustworthy and I can tell her anything. Perhaps she even wants to help, which wouldn’t be a bad thing.
“Okay, but this is private, Heather. Nobody else can know.”
“Alright,” she agrees.
“The last thing he remembers is going to confront his psychiatrist, Mrs. Peyton, about a private issue. She crossed the line with him.”
“Meaning?”
“I think she wanted a relationship. His mom found out about it somehow, and she confronted Peyton about it, threatening to expose her. Nick went to talk to Peyton about the situation. The conversation apparently didn’t go well, and they ended up arguing. He walked toward the window, trying to grab a breath of air. He was feeling a panic attack coming on so he bent out to get some air. He felt a sharp pain in his neck and everything went black. He never woke up again. I don’t have proof, but I’m sure Peyton killed him. I think she pushed him from the window, and he broke his neck or something. That’s my theory anyway.”
Other than a shake of her head and a nearly untraceable smirk, Heather says nothing, so I continue.
“Lana said she has his body stashed somewhere. She also told me how to find Peyton, which I intend to do immediately.”
This revelation seems to catch her attention and irritate her all in the same as her face reddens and her breathing quickens.
“You can’t go after Peyton, it isn’t your place. Leave this to the authorities. Haven’t you had enough backlash from dealing with Manning already?”
“The authorities won’t even acknowledge that a crime has taken place so how can I do that? This is the only way. I can’t be okay with the father of my child trapped in this purgatory for eternity. Even if that means losing him forever, setting him free is the right thing to do.” I push back the tears that begin stinging my eyes.
Heather’s phone rings loudly. She retrieves it from her baggy pocket, checking the caller ID.
“Sydney, can you excuse me for a moment? It’s work. We can finish this conversation later.”
“Sure. I wanted to check in with Nick anyway. Want me to come back out when I’m done?” It still feels odd talking about Nick in front of Heather.
“Yeah, I do. I still have a few things I need to address while we are on the subject. Go talk to Manning and come back when you’re done. This shouldn’t take long.” A phony smile curls the corner of her mouth up slightly.
I steal a hug before heading upstairs to the loft where I can find some privacy.
“Love ya’, Heather Feather.”
“I love you too, Squid. Go on now. Do your ghosty thing.”
From the noises coming from the loft area it seems to already be occupied. Mia is giggling and Cayden is impersonating someone with a very strange accent—they are like a couple of teenagers enjoying the first whimsical moments of courtship. I don’t want to disturb their fun time so I head downstairs to the game room.
There is a wonderful fireplace and a sofa to relax on. I turn the key releasing the gas, igniting the warm flickering flames. I wrap myself in a fuzzy soft blanket the color of soft fragrant sage. I can almost place myself in a garden full of it. My imagination perfects itself more thoroughly the more frequently I tap into my subconscious. There are so many pieces of the human potential yet to be unlocked. My experience with Nick tells me just how much more I have to learn, and I can’t wait. I cash in on the silence, close my eyes and begin reaching for him.
“Nick, you here?”
“Of course I’m here, baby. I miss you so much. When are you coming home?” His eyes sparkle.
“Tomorrow, baby. And I miss you too. Things have been kind of crazy around here. Heather has finally acknowledged your existence. She knows about—everything.”
“I’m sure that went over real well,” he adds, casually.
“She’s being cool about it. She did have some questions about your disappearance though so I told her some of the information we have. She had done some previous research on you and your family. She could really be a huge help for us, she is a good person. I hope someday you two can make peace.”
“I’ll let you know if hell freezes over,” he sasses.
“I can make that happen when I get home and I go to sleep. I can create whatever scenario I want, remember?” I giggle.
“You’re a tricky little girl, aren’t you? I love it.”
“I learned from the master. Speaking of, make sure you have something really sexy planned for when I get back, I’m gonna tear you up when I get home.”
“You’re so damn hot.” His tongue gently grazes his top teeth, a sure sign he’s already feeling fireworks in anticipation.
“Stop doing that with your tongue. It’s crazy sexy and I have to go. Heather and I have to finish our conversation, its important.”
“Nice, Syd.” His face is displeased.
“What?”
“You can’t just throw me into an ice bath when I’m on fire. You’re a tease.” He puts his tongue back into its sexy place, holding it there, purposely driving me crazy.
“Revenge is sweet. Remember that, Mr. Manning.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, baby, anxiously awaiting your revenge. Unlike you, I love it when you torture me, I love
the pain you make me feel everywhere.” He winks and disappears into his world, leaving me breathless.
I make my way back upstairs to the front door, pausing momentarily as I realize Heather is still in conversation. From the window I note her pacing as she speaks through her Bluetooth. Not only does she look agitated but the wild usage of her hands as she speaks also indicates something is very wrong. Concern builds slightly as I wonder what’s happened now. I walk out with a puzzled look just as she hangs up.
“I’m going to have to leave, Syd. It’s an emergency at work,” she huffs.
“It can’t wait? We still have one more night here. I don’t want you to leave,” I beg.
My words bring a smile to her full lips.
“I need you to come with me, actually. We have a conversation to finish, and we can do that in the car on the way home. While you were downstairs I went ahead and asked Mia and Cayden if they would like to stay and have the place to themselves for the night and tomorrow. They certainly didn’t argue.”
“I’m sure they didn’t. They’ve been cadoodling like school kids all weekend, and it’s aggravating my morning sickness,” I joke.
“I hear you. I asked them to just bring your things home for you tomorrow so we can go ahead and get a head start on the ride now.” She seems edgy and rushed.
“Okay, let me go say goodbye, and we can head on out.”
“The cab will be here in a few minutes; they’ll need the truck to get home. They already took off to the grocery store to get some steaks and champagne for their romantic evening. She told me to let you know she’ll text you later.”
“Alright. Do you want to chat before the cab gets here? This is a private matter, and I don’t really feel comfortable discussing it in front of a strange cabby.”
“I totally agree. Look, Sydney, you cannot go after this woman on your own. If she is what you say she is—a murderer—then why would you even consider getting involved with such people. Let me do some more digging first,” she suggests.
“Heather, I really appreciate that you are concerned for me, but I have a way of finding her without her even knowing I’m coming. Lana gave me a few clues, and one of them is a direct link to her. I don’t want to put you in a bad position and lie to you anymore, but I’m doing this. End of story.”
Dreamers (The Dreamers Series) Page 19